Lovestrung: A friends to lovers romance

by Karen Ferry

  What could I say? It was best to leave well enough alone and move on. Frustrated, I went to my closet, found my suitcase, and started to throw my clothes haphazardly inside it. The longer I stayed in this house, the worse it would feel to say goodbye, and I couldn’t risk it.

  My eyes fell on the bed in front of me, the covers tangled and showing the imprint of where she’d been only minutes ago. Agony tore through me and I closed my eyes, welcoming the memory of our kiss. I let it play through my mind over and over for a long time, as if it was a scene from a movie, and then I shut a lid on it.

  I buried it deep and locked it away, never to be opened again.

  It had to be this way.

  It just had to.

  12

  Waiting

  Present Day

  Penelope: Something’s come up. I can’t make it to dinner tonight. Sorry.

  I furrowed my brows and stared at the text on my phone, willing the words to disappear from the screen. That wasn’t part of the plan. I’d waited a whole year for her to come back – there were times it felt like I’d waited my entire life for only her, and now this? A brush-off?

  A drop of water fell on the screen, and I brushed my wet hair off my face. I’d just come out of the shower, ready to spend the day getting my apartment to look more like a home before seeing her tonight, and when her name had lit up my screen, I hadn’t bothered to grab a towel and dry myself before reading it.

  I fired off a text to her.

  Me: Sunshine, are you sick?

  Anxious for her answer, I wiped the steam off the mirror in my bathroom and stared hard at my reflection before picking up shaving foam and my razor. My phone dinged, and I looked down at it as it balanced on the counter.

  Penelope: No, but my parents decided to spend the night and I don’t feel right ditching them so soon after I’ve just returned home. And Eliza and Hugo are staying as well, so…

  Clenching my teeth, I cursed southern hospitality to the fiery pits of hell. Before I risked sounding like a lovesick fool and texted her back, begging her to come to me, my cell dinged again.

  Penelope: But to tell the truth, we’re all pretty jet lagged today, so taking it easy is probably best.

  I grunted. I hadn’t thought of that, so couldn’t exactly blame her for wanting to take it easy on her first day home. Still, I had a nagging suspicion that she was telling me a bunch of excuses and not the real reason for cancelling on me.

  Me: Get some rest. How about tomorrow?

  Penelope: We’ll see.

  Annoyance flared to life and instead of giving her a scathing reply, I grabbed the shaving cream and lathered up. I rinsed my hands, letting the soothing water cool my temper, before drying off and I sent her another text.

  Me: Don’t play coy with me. Do you regret what happened yesterday?

  It took her a long time to reply, but when it did, a wicked grin crept over my lips.

  Penelope: No, I don’t. My head is still spinning from the way you kissed me.

  Me: Good.

  Penelope: I never wanted you to stop. No boy has ever kissed me like that.

  Me: I’m no boy, darlin’. You’ll do well to remember that.

  Penelope: That sounds like a threat.

  Me: Not a threat. Consider it more a promise of what’s to come the next time I see you.

  Resigned that I wouldn’t get another taste of Penelope any time soon, I finished shaving and left the bathroom. I went to the walk-in-closet next to my new bed that had arrived this morning and pulled on some sweats and a T-shirt and then I set about unpacking so that I could spend the next few hours getting the rest of my new bookshelves up.

  What I really wanted to do was to send off a string of texts to her, conveying the fantasies I’d had of her for so long, but I managed to keep in check. I wasn’t great with words. I preferred showing a woman what I wanted. I gave while taking, always making sure she was satisfied before getting my own release, but when I thought about our heavy make-out session yesterday and how close I’d come to spilling my load before she’d come, a shudder coursed through me. I felt like a wild teenager again instead of a twenty-seven-year-old man.

  When my phone alerted me of another text, I was scowling at the step-by-step guide in my hand. Who the fuck knew it would be this fucking complicated to assemble bookshelves?

  I sighed and picked up my phone from my pocket.

  Penelope: Does that mean you’ll devour me the next time I see you?

  Blood buzzed in my ears at the image her words conjured. Penelope lying on her back on my couch, her long legs and thighs slung over my shoulders while my fingers spread her pussy lips and I fucked her with my tongue. From what I’d seen and felt last night, I already knew she was completely bare apart from a small, neat strip of hair, and my mouth salivated. Groaning, I pressed down on my aching dick.

  Me: Darlin’, I’ll do whatever you want me to.

  I twitched when my phone started to ring, lighting up the screen with Penelope Calling, and I swiped to answer.

  “I’m sorry I can’t be with you tonight,” she said, her voice soft and apologetic in my ear.

  “Me, too. What are you doing? I thought your guests were keeping you busy.”

  “Eliza and Hugo are taking a nap, so I thought I’d better unpack.”

  I got up from my place on the floor to grab a water bottle from the fridge.

  “Shouldn’t you relax as well?” I asked, resting the phone between my ear and shoulder to uncap the bottle.

  “Mmm, probably.” Ruffling sounded in the background. “But I feel edgy, restless. I can’t seem to settle so I’m going to keep busy until tonight and hope I’ll crash.”

  I brought the bottle to my lips and swallowed a few gulps.

  “That sounds sensible.”

  “I’ve been known to not always be impulsive,” she teased.

  That made me chuckle. “Yeah, I know.”

  I looked out over the mess that was my floor and frowned. “Well, even though I’m anxious to spend time with you, it’s probably a good thing you’re not here right now. My home’s a disaster.”

  She laughed and I heard some creaking and a sigh once she’d stopped chuckling. “Gramps told me you’ve only just moved into your new place. I can’t wait to see it.”

  “Me, too,” I answered on a murmur and walked to the other end of the room. I stared down at my king-size bed that had finally arrived yesterday evening when I came home from dinner with the Montgomerys. It was made of wrought iron with burnished copper fixtures on the ends of the headboard. On a whim, I decided to put into words how much I longed for her. “I’ve missed you.”

  She was quiet for some time, keeping me waiting with my heart lodged in my throat.

  “You have?”

  “Of course I have. I…damn it, Pen. I’m not good at this thing.”

  “What thing?” she prompted.

  “This. Talking.” I let out a long breath and sat down on the firm mattress. “I mean, I’m not good at talking on the phone.”

  “It’s all right. Actually…” She hesitated for a beat but then seemed to make up her mind and her words flowed, stumbling over each other. “I almost didn’t call you, because that would make everything more real.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “I’ve had a crush on you for years, Ethan, but I meant what I said a year ago and again yesterday: I don’t feel like I know you anymore, and then seeing you last night, and then…then, getting all caught up in the heat of the moment…it was everything and more than I could ever imagine. It felt glorious and amazing, but it also scares me. For the first time in my life, I’m truly scared of my own feelings. I woke up this morning thinking it had all been a dream – a crazy, wonderful dream – and I couldn’t help but wonder if what we did last night was one colossal mistake.”

  I squeezed the phone tightly as her words seeped through me.

  “Mistake?” I growled. “Penelope, nothing will ever be a mistake where t
he two of us are concerned.”

  She inhaled, and I wished I could see her right now. That I could comfort her and reassure her that what we’d have would be worth it. That she was worth it.

  I was the unworthy one.

  “You listen to me, and pay attention. I. Want. You. I’ve always wanted you, ever since you were fifteen and I realized you weren’t only my best friend anymore. That you’d somehow morphed into…well, something more. But I buried it deep, so deep that I never allowed myself to dig it out again. I didn’t want to hope that there was even the possibility of an us happening.”

  I lowered my voice. “I know you’re scared, and fuck, so am I, but I’ve been desperate for you for years. You’re my girl, and you always have been. Now, we won’t only be friends anymore. We’ll be friends dating, exploring the fucking mind blowing attraction we have for one another, and we’ll take it one day at a time. You hear me?”

  “I’m your girl?” she whispered.

  The quiet wonder in her voice made me groan. How could she not know this?

  “For fuck’s sake, this conversation would be so much easier to have if you were here.”

  “Oh, really?”

  “Yes,” I hissed. “At least then I could shut down your fears with my mouth and my body. Make you forget everything but you and me.”

  “Damn it, now I wish I was at your place, too,” she sighed. “Tomorrow night?”

  I fisted my hand and quietly rejoiced. “Fuck, yes. And bring a bag. I’m not letting you out of my sight until Wednesday. Maybe Thursday.”

  Fuck, stay the whole week with me.

  I could hear the grin in her voice when she answered. “I’ll bring enough, don’t worry.” Then she seemed to sober up and sighed softly. “I better let you go.”

  The reluctance in her voice made me feel like I was ten feet tall.

  “Only if you feel you should. I don’t mind.”

  “I thought you said you weren’t good at talking on the phone?”

  “Well, you’re not horrible to talk with, darlin’. You never have been.” I stood up and stretched before going back to the living room. “Plus,” I scowled at the offending bookshelves littering the floor all around me, “you’d be giving me a break from working on the meanest bookshelves for a while.”

  “Aww. Cute.” The teasing note in her voice made me ache for her. “Actually, I do need to unpack, and once the honeymooners are awake, I’ll go see what they want to do.”

  “Technically, they aren’t on their honeymoon because they aren’t married yet.”

  “Semantics. They’ve been together for five years, lived together the past three, and they bicker as if they’ve been married for fifty. Trust me, the fact that they haven’t made it official yet is just a technicality.”

  My grin turned into a full blown smile. “You’re adorable.”

  She hummed, and the sound made my dick stir. “All right, I’ll talk to you later. Oh, and you haven’t texted me your address yet.”

  “I’ll get on that right away. Later, darlin’.”

  “Later, Ethan.”

  Smiling wide, I swiped the red button before tossing the phone on the couch next to me. Feeling happier than I had in a very long time, I looked at the mess on my floor. Then, deciding I needed to get a move on, I got up and got to work.

  If my girl was going to stay with me for a couple of days, I wanted her to see that it was the truth I wasn’t a boy anymore. A man didn’t act or live like a slob in a dorm room. A man got shit done in order to impress his girl.

  13

  Stalling

  I wasn’t prepared to have Penelope over for dinner.

  Well, I was and I wasn’t.

  I’d cleaned the whole place after conquering and finishing the bookshelves late last night, the chicken was in the oven, and I’d lit fucking candles on practically every available surface.

  Candles. I should be admitted to a psychiatric ward, trying to set a romantic mood like I did.

  But having a girl – scratch that, a woman – over for dinner was so new for me that I hardly knew what to do with myself. Hence the cleaning all day. I didn’t want to be presumptuous, but I’d changed the sheets and bedding on my bed – after waking up with a leaking dick, it would be rude not to. Maybe she’d talked herself out of staying the night, and if she had, I wouldn’t put any pressure on her – even though it would suck if she wanted to leave, I’d accept it. I only hoped she’d let me play with her first.

  My dick had been semi hard the last couple hours, and I’d been tempted to relieve myself in the shower earlier; but hoping Penelope would spend the night had stilled my hand. If she did, I didn’t want to risk a lack of stamina. Need and fire were at a low simmer inside me, wreaking havoc with my mind, and I knew it would only get worse once she got here. The memory of the other day when she’d let me inside her wetness, teasing her until she’d come all over me, played on repeat in my brain.

  “Get a grip, man,” I muttered at my reflection in the bathroom mirror. “Great, now I’m talking to myself.” Annoyed, I styled my hair a little bit, making sure that it looked like I’d made an effort to look nice for her.

  It was just after six in the evening, and Pen had texted me only ten minutes ago, letting me know she was on her way.

  I pulled at the V neck of my black T-shirt and left the bathroom the same moment the buzzer alerted me that she’d arrived. The minute I laid eyes on her beaming smile shining up at me from the camera the nerves I’d refused to acknowledge all day disappeared.

  Fuck, she was beautiful.

  “Come on up, darlin’,” I grinned, pressing the button to let her in. I opened the door and went to wait for her in front of the elevator, not caring in the least if I was coming on too strong for her.

  The minute the black doors opened, my jaw dropped open at the sight of her.

  She’d turned her hair into a wave of long, curly locks, and she was wearing the most alluring black, lace top with a high neckline, leaving her arms bare from the shoulders down. My eyes wandered down and I shook my head at the long, light pink ballerina skirt that came all the way down to her ankles. Her toes peeked out of black sandals, the nails painted the same shade as the skirt, and worried I’d start to salivate, my gaze crept back up to land on her face.

  “Wow,” I murmured.

  “Now, that’s exactly the reaction I was going for when I picked this outfit,” she said and came toward me.

  “Fucking gorgeous, darlin’.”

  She grinned up at me before leaning up on her toes to press a lingering kiss on the corner of my mouth. When she stepped back, I quirked an eyebrow at her.

  “That’s all I’m getting? A light peck?”

  “Don’t be greedy,” she tsked and then pointed her thumb over her shoulder. “This way?”

  “Yes.”

  Still grinning at me, she hefted her small overnight bag and gave me her back as she wandered closer. My steps faltered when I saw all the buttons on her top, and I suppressed the groan that wanted to rumble from my chest.

  How am I going to survive tonight?

  “I was wondering,” she mused as she took in my loft, “why do you sometimes call me darlin’, and then, other times, you use sunshine instead?”

  I hurried after her, shutting and locking the door without losing her from my eyesight.

  “Ah, you’ve noticed that, have you?”

  “When it comes to you, I tend to notice everything, Ethan. I always have.”

  My heart skipped a beat – an actual, honest-to-God skip that I felt down to the very tip of my toes – and I ran a hand through my hair.

  How did I explain the distinction between my endearments for her without sounding like a fucking pervert?

  “Want a glass of wine?” I asked instead and went to the bar.

  She walked closer and nodded. “Do you have any white?”

  “Of course. Frederik sent me home with a case the other night,” I smiled, making her chuckle.


  “Gramps does love to spoil his kids,” she nodded.

  My heart warmed at that even when it settled like a rock in the pit of my stomach at the same time.

  “He thinks of you as his, you know.” I glanced at her, overcome with the tender sound of her voice. “He always has. As have Dad and Mama. Surely you already know this?”

  I didn’t know what to do or say to that revelation. The truth was that I didn’t know, but now that she’d told me, I was able to admit to myself that I’d hoped that was the case. I went to get the wine from the stainless-steel fridge before opening the cabinet hanging next to the stove. After I found the wine glasses, I turned back around and smiled softly at her.

  Her eyes looked nervous as her lips formed a cautious smile. “You haven’t answered my question.”

  I frowned as I opened the drawer underneath the table top. “It’s a little embarrassing,” I admitted, my voice quiet.

  “Oh, God, now I really want to know why you do it.”

  Chuckling, I shook my head. “You always were as curious as a kitten.”

  “I’ll take that as a compliment, thank you.”

  “It’s meant as such.” I wet my lips and poured her glass and extended it to her. As I made my own, I lowered my gaze and took a deep breath. “I started calling you sunshine when we were just kids because that’s what you felt like to me – this cute, ballsy, best friend who lit up the room whenever she walked in and aimed her smile my way, warming me from the inside out.”

  She gasped but I still didn’t meet her eyes.

  “Darlin’ is for now, when you’re no longer only my best friend, but a young woman who makes my dick hard and I want to kiss and fuck all the time.”