by Jenny Frame
Quade had been sure there was something between them, but to actually hear Penny say it was something else.
“What does someone like you see in me, Penny? I’m just a farmer. You’re a smart, beautiful, successful businesswoman, and a Huntingdon-Stewart.”
“Are you kidding?” Penny said. “You’re kind, strong, gentle with your animals, and tender, just like my dream—”
Penny stopped abruptly as if she realized she’d said too much, and her cheeks went pink.
How could she be someone’s dream? Quade was astonished.
“When you took care of me after my last fit, and you stayed with me, it was the safest I’ve ever felt, and every night since I’ve missed you, like you should be there. It’s all because of you.”
Tears came to Penny’s eyes and Quade turned around to face Penny, holding her hand tightly. “Hey, don’t be upset. You have to know I feel the same. The first time I saw you walk up my driveway, you took my breath away, and I’ve tried to take care of you since. I never in a million years thought I was in your league.”
“Of course you are, Sammy, but I’m not upset because of how I feel. It’s because what I feel for you has made me face some things I’ve never had to before.”
“What is that, sweetheart?”
Quade felt Penny’s hand tremble, and she remembered all the little clues she had picked up along the way. The way she flinched when touched, the stubborn attitude to do everything herself.
She tried to help Penny say it. Quade held up their joined hands. “Is it to do with this? Being close with someone?”
Penny nodded, and she dried her tears. “Yes. I’ve never had a relationship. I’ve never even slept with someone.”
Quade squeezed her hand. “You find it difficult to trust, let people in?”
Penny wiped her eyes. “Yes. I never could, not until I totally trusted them anyway. The women I met wanted into my bed, and I wanted just to hold their hand and test whether I could trust. I hate to show the real me, because that’s always been what people have laughed at.”
“Why would you say that?” Quade asked. “Why would anyone laugh at you, Penny?”
“When I was at boarding school, I was about twelve when my epilepsy developed. I was at the top of the stone stairs in the entrance hall when I had my first attack. I fell down the stairs, broke my leg quite badly, but to me that wasn’t the worst. When I came out of it, there were teachers pinning me down. I couldn’t talk, I couldn’t move. I was confused and helpless.”
“I’m so sorry. That must have been so scary for you.” Quade stroked the back of Penny’s hand with her thumb.
“What made it worse was all the other girls crowded around the teachers, looking down at me, whispering, laughing, I felt so vulnerable.”
“Kids can be so cruel.” Quade’s heart broke for Penny. It was no wonder she had so many fears.
“Ever since, I’ve always kept that vulnerable part hidden. I don’t want to be laughed at again, and I’ve always been frightened I’ll have a fit while I’m being close with someone, and I’m completely vulnerable.”
Everything about Penny fell into place. Quade considered carefully how to respond. She didn’t want to say the wrong thing. Rather than talk about the intimate side of her worries, she asked, “What did you feel when you woke in my arms from your fit.”
Penny thought carefully. “I felt safe. I always feel safe with you, Sammy. Do you know you’re the only one, outside my family, that’s gotten past my bedroom door?”
Quade shook her head. “I didn’t, but I understand why.”
“You do?”
“Yeah, the first time I saw all your medications by the side of your bed, I knew that it was your most private space. The side of you that you didn’t trust anyone else to see.”
Penny gave her a small smile. “You understand me like no one else has, but you deserve someone who won’t try to kiss you and break your nose.”
Quade chuckled. “I don’t deserve anything. Never in my wildest dreams did I ever think a beautiful sophisticated woman like you would have feelings for me. I’m the luckiest person in the world that you even look my way.”
“Don’t say that, Sammy. You’re gorgeous, you’re Sexy Farmer.”
Quade smiled. “Well I’m glad you think so, but I have to ask you something, Ms. Huntingdon-Stewart.”
“What?”
“Would you allow me to court you?” Quade asked.
“But I’m supposed to be wooing you,” Penny said.
Quade furrowed her brow. “Who told you that?”
“Bridge. She said I was to woo you.”
Quade smiled and shook her head. “Don’t listen to Bridge. She always has to be in charge. I do the courting—that’s the way it is.”
“Okay, okay.” Penny laughed. “I’d be delighted to be courted by you, Sam McQuade, but—”
A look of worry was back on Penny’s face.
“No buts,” Quade said. “Do you know what old-fashioned courting means?”
“Flowers, walks, that kind of thing?” Penny said.
“Yes, it can include all those things, but mainly what it means is slow,” Quade said.
“Slow?”
“Slow, and getting to know each other slowly, building our relationship slowly, and getting comfortable with each other, so that whatever happens, happens naturally, and never until you are absolutely ready. That’s the way I was brought up to behave when I had romantic feelings for someone.”
Penny pulled Quade’s hand to her lips and kissed it. “I think that’s the nicest thing anyone’s ever said to me, Sammy. Thank you for understanding.”
“I always understand you. You never have to feel scared or pressured with me, okay?”
Penny nodded. “I’ve never wanted to explore this with anyone before. I just hope I can be everything you want.”
Quade ran the back of her hand along Penny’s arm. “Penny, I don’t have huge experience with women. Compared to Harry or Bridge, I’m a novice at best, so I have no expectations other than what you want to share with me.”
“Okay, I suppose at least one of us should know what they’re doing,” Penny joked.
Quade reached out and cupped Penny’s cheek. “The slow scenic route seems good to me. Now, can I get some of that delicious looking cake?”
The tension broke and Penny laughed.
* * *
Penny decided that gateaux should be for dessert since she heard Quade’s stomach rumbling. Quade sat at the kitchen table with Princess enjoying her attention, while Penny looked in Quade’s fridge.
“Eggs, bacon, milk, cheese? Don’t you have anything else to eat?”
“There’s some potatoes in the pantry,” Quade said.
Penny sighed and turned back to find Quade’s eyes locked on her bottom. It made her smile. Since their talk, Penny felt like she’d crossed another boundary, and a weight lifted off her shoulders. She felt like she could relax and enjoy what was growing between them without worry about where it might lead. Penny trusted Quade, and no matter how Quade insisted she would court her, Penny was going to do a fair bit of wooing and enjoy the experience.
She stood up and put her hands on her hips. “I thought you farmers needed to eat big meals all day? You must do, to give that strong body of yours the energy.” Penny winked at Quade.
Was she actually flirting? And enjoying it? Penny’s heart was more free than it ever had been. Because of Quade she could now try to enjoy those little sweet beginnings of a relationship that she never could before, and she decided she was going to revel in it.
“We do, but if you only know how to make egg and bacon, bacon and egg, and egg, bacon, and chips, it’s hard.”
Penny was horrified at Quade’s diet. “You can’t eat that three times a day. How do you cope?”
Quade ruffled Princess’s head and set her down on the floor. “Well, if I’m working at Axedale, Annie makes us lunch, and I usually go to the pub for dinner,
or there’s the fish and chip shop. Then on Sundays I go to Axedale for Sunday lunch.”
Penny shook her head and tutted. “That needs to change, but for right now how does an omelette sound?”
Quade beamed. “Sounds brilliant.”
Penny went back to the fridge, then said, “Do you have any spinach in your vegetable garden?”
“Yes,” Quade said slowly and reluctantly.
“Excellent.”
Forty-five minutes later, Penny brought over two plates to the table. She put Quade’s down in front of her, and Quade rubbed her hands together.
“This looks so good.”
The cheese omelette with toast on the side looked like something you’d get at a restaurant, and she couldn’t wait to dive in.
Penny put her own plate down and went back to the cooker to get a frying pan.
“There’s one more thing,” Penny said.
Quade looked in horror as Penny spooned some wilted green leaves onto her plate.
“What is that?” Quade prodded it with her fork as if it might be dangerous.
Penny grinned. “It’s sautéed spinach. Spinach grown by you, so it’s even better.”
Penny put the pan down and took her seat. Quade looked at Penny’s plate and saw no green at all, only toast. Why was she being singled out for this torture?
“You don’t have any?” Quade pointed with her fork to Penny’s plate.
Penny began to spread jam on her toast. “That’s because I’ve got nothing to have it with. I could have had a stir fry with your beautiful vegetables, but you’ve no garlic, chillis, soy sauce—I really need to take you shopping.” Penny crunched into her thick cut toast.
Quade couldn’t think of anything worse than eating that green splodge, so she started on her omelette, hoping that Penny would forget about it.
“This tastes so good,” Quade said.
Penny took a drink of water and said, “Would you like to come for dinner at my cottage? When you haven’t got any other offers, of course.”
“Really?” Quade said excitedly. “Wait? What other offers have I got?”
“All the ladies from your dating app. Oh, and my fans would love to cook for Sexy Farmer.” Penny waggled her eyebrows.
“As if. That would be great, to come to yours. Dougal would love it too.”
Dougal barked and jumped up on one of the kitchen chairs.
Penny laughed. “What’s he doing?”
Quade cut off a piece of cheesy omelette and held it out for him. “He always sits up here begging for scraps and keeps me company. It’s not much fun eating on your own.”
Penny gazed dreamily at her, and then pulled out the other chair. “Princess? Up.”
Princess jumped up and Quade immediately gave her a share of the food.
“You’re not alone now,” Penny said.
Quade looked around the table and for the first time since her aunt and uncle died, the farmhouse felt alive again.
“Don’t think I’ve forgotten about that spinach, Sam McQuade.”
Dammit.
* * *
Quade drove Penny and Princess back to Northwood Cottage after spending a lovely evening together. After they ate, Penny and Quade talked and talked until they realized it was midnight.
It was such a revelation to be able to talk to Quade about her insecurities and have Quade chase them away.
They stopped outside and Penny said, “Thank you, Sammy. I never thought I’d be able to talk like this to anyone.”
Quade turned around in her seat. “Don’t worry about any silly fears in your head. You’re safe with me, Penny. I’d never expose any of your secret fears or personal life. You’re beautiful, kind, and a good mum to Princess. You deserve someone to take their time to show you how good a partner they could be.”
Quade would be the perfect partner, she knew. Quade was a once in a lifetime chance at happiness. Once someone won her love, Penny was sure that she would love them for the rest of her life.
“Thank you for understanding, anyway, and sorry about hurting your nose last night. I suppose I was trying to show you how I felt, but I messed it up and felt foolish.”
Quade smiled. “Everything will come right in its own time. Like the seasons in the countryside. You wait until conditions are right. You don’t force them.”
Penny could have melted in her seat. Quade was a girl’s dream. “You know, I was attracted to you from the first time I saw you. I tried for the longest time to find a flaw in you—that’s what I usually do, you see. When I find someone attractive, I find a reason, a flaw in their character, to put me off, and I always have, but not with you. I couldn’t find one flaw. All I found were things that I dreamed of in a partner.”
Quade blushed sweetly. “I have lots of flaws, believe me.”
“Not to me,” Penny said.
They gazed at each other silently for a few minutes. Penny’s heart was thumping wildly, and she wasn’t scared.
She felt herself being drawn closer to Quade, and then Quade broke the silence by saying, “Let me walk you to your door.”
Quade got out, and Penny tried to calm her racing heart. Quade helped Penny out and took the bags they had filled with vegetables from Quade’s garden, then whistled for the dogs.
The dogs jumped out and ran to the door.
“Here, let me take some bags, Sammy,” Penny said.
“Oh no. Taking you home and carrying your bags is part of the courting process,” Quade said.
Penny followed her to the door. “So when do I get to woo? I think it’s only fair.”
“Penny, you woo me every time you smile at me, every time you frown at me, even, every pretty dress you wear, every unicorn onesie you wear, and everything you cook for me. You’re wooing me all the time.”
Penny sighed with happiness. “Thank you. That was a lovely thing to say.”
She unlocked the door and Quade carried the bags into the living room.
“So tomorrow at six for dinner?”
“I can’t wait,” Quade said.
There was a moment when Penny actually hoped Quade would kiss her, but she just reached for her hand and kissed it.
“Goodnight, Penny.”
“Night, Sammy. Sweet dreams.” I know mine will be.
As Quade walked to the door, she turned her head back to say, “I will—oh, and enjoy your book.”
Penny was confused. “What book?”
“The one on your bedside table.” Quade winked and walked out the front door with Dougal.
Penny felt her cheeks grow extremely hot. She had seen it.
Chapter Sixteen
The following week was one of the happiest Quade had ever had. After a hard day’s work, she and Dougal went to Penny’s for dinner. They enjoyed a great meal, and Penny even went to the trouble of making two different meals, one health-conscious for Penny, and what Quade would call a normal dinner for her. Although with every meal, Penny added more vegetables to her plate.
Penny was determined to improve Quade’s palate and crowd out the more unhealthy choices, and if Penny wanted her to try them, Quade would. She was fast becoming completely enamoured with Penny. Every day they spent together, the more Penny relaxed, and the funny, sweet, woman she was came through.
Today Penny was filming in the kitchen at Axedale Hall, and Quade was having a suit fitting for the wedding which was a week away. Quade was helping Penny set up her equipment—putting lights up, setting them, and positioning microphones. Riley had taken Dougal and Princess to play outside with her and Caesar, to give Penny some quiet to record. Princess was used to being on camera, Penny said, but since she’d met Dougal, her inner dog had come to the surface and was a bit loud and playful.
Quade had hardly been able to take her eyes off Penny. For her recording she was wearing a fifties-style pink skirt with a large white poodle on it and a tight white blouse, with a pink neckerchief. She reminded Quade of her childhood crush on Olivia Newton-John in Greas
e. Quade always wanted to be Danny, driving one of those cool cars, with Sandy in the car beside her.
Now she had her own version in front of her and she wanted to kiss her so badly.
“Is this light okay, Penny?”
Penny was standing behind the large kitchen table setting out her ingredients, bowls, and kitchen equipment. She looked up and was dazzled by the light.
“A bit more to the right, Sammy.”
Quade moved it and Penny said with a sexy smile, “Perfect. I should use you as my assistant for every video.”
Quade’s heart fluttered as it did with every compliment Penny gave her. “Anytime. I’ll do anything for you, you know that.”
Penny gazed at her silently for a few seconds, then put down what she was holding and walked over to her.
She took Quade’s hands and stepped closer. “I do know that. You know, all my life I thought being strong meant doing everything myself, but I was wrong.”
“Why?” Quade asked.
Penny felt like she was falling deeper and deeper for Quade with every moment she spent with her. Quade was so easy to fall in love with, and that was frightening but made her feel elated at the same time.
“I was wrong because since I’ve had you in my life, I feel stronger than I ever have. Knowing you are behind me has given me such confidence.”
Quade slipped her hands around Penny’s waist and inched closer. “I’m glad to hear it. You are the strongest person I know, sweetheart.”
Penny smiled, her heart thudded, and their lips inched closer. “I like it when you call me that.”
It was going to happen. They were actually going to kiss and Penny wanted nothing more in the world than to feel Quade’s lips on hers. Just as they were about to touch, the kitchen door burst open and they moved apart quickly.
Penny cursed her bad luck. She was so ready to kiss Quade, but she smiled when a grinning Annie and Bridget walked down the stone steps.
“Sorry, did we interrupt something?” Bridget teased.
Quade’s cheeks were adorably pink as she was sure hers were as well. “No, just getting set up.”