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Complete Dramatic Works of Thomas Dekker

Page 53

by Thomas Dekker


  BARTERVILE

  Besides the use.

  FIRST GENTLEMAN

  The use is there too.

  BARTERVILE

  Hold.

  I’ll take it without telling.Put it up.

  BOTH

  Not till we see the writings.

  Enter LURCHALL.

  BARTERVILE

  Dare you touch it?

  BOTH

  Dare!Yes, sir, and date stab him to the heart

  Offers to take it from us.

  BARTERVILE

  Who stabs first? [Flings money amongst it.

  Now, touch it if you dare; there’s gold of mine

  And if they lay one finger on’t, cry thieves,

  They come to rob me!Touch it if you dare.

  FIRST GENTLEMAN

  Damn’d wretch, thou wild go quick to hell I fear.

  BARTERVILE

  No, sir, the devil shall fetch me when I go.

  LURCHALL

  [Aside.] Th’art all my errand.

  SECOND GENTLEMAN

  We are cheated both.

  BARTERVILE

  Proceed in your Chancery suit; I have begun your bill.

  Humbly complaining.

  FIRST GENTLEMAN

  Of thee, villain, I’ll complain

  That sells thy soul for money; devils on earth dwell,

  And men are nowhere; all this world is hell! [Exeunt Gentlemen.

  BARTERVILE

  I kiss thy forehead, my witty Oedipus,

  That canst unfold such riddles.[One rings.Exit one Servant.

  LURCHALL

  Sir, I am bound

  To do you all service, [Aside.] till I you all confound.

  Enter First Servant.

  FIRST SERVANT

  Master Silverpen the proctor, sir, sends word if you come not in to-morrow and personally depose your payment of the two hundred crowns, you’ll be non-suited.

  BARTERVILE

  That is a law-draught goes down coldly.

  LURCHALL

  Why sir?’Tis but your swearing the money is paid.

  BARTERVILE

  If oaths had back doors to come in at without danger of damnation to catch a man’s soul bith back swearing were brave.

  FIRST SERVANT

  What answer shall I give the proctor’s man?

  LURCHALL

  Tell him my master shall come in and swear. [Exit Servant and enter.

  BARTERVILE

  Do, tell him; on thee I’ll build.Now all my fear

  Is for appearance at the Chancellor’s court.

  No trick to save that?

  LURCHALL

  I have a brave one for’t.

  Bring in a pottle of wine.[Exit Servant.] Will Carlo here,

  My fellow, depose a truth if he see it, to help

  His master?

  BARTERVILE

  Wut thou not, honest Carlo?

  SECOND SERVANT

  Yes, sir.

  Enter Servant with wine.

  FIRST SERVANT

  Here’s the wine.

  LURCHALL

  Set this to your head anon, sir; when ’tis there

  Away you, and to-morrow thou mayst swear

  Before the chancellor, and swear true, if he

  Were in that case thou leftst him, ‘twere in vain

  To hope he could live till thou camst back again.

  BARTERVILE

  All knights i’th’ post learn this trick; the fits upon me now.

  LURCHALL

  Take a good draught; ‘twill help you, sir.It gulps;

  He’s almost breathless.Carolo, away!

  FIRST SERVANT

  I am gone.[Exit.

  LURCHALL

  He’s gone, he’s gone, sir.

  BARTERVILE

  One gulp more had choked me;

  This wine has washed my fears off. Tha’st given me power

  To make me dote upon thee.Carolo’s gone?

  LURCHALL

  Yes, and will swear his heart out to your good.

  Swear let him; be thyself and he damn’d too.

  BARTERVILE

  So I may get by it.In my bosom’s sleep,

  My dove, my love, prosper but thou and I.

  LURCHALL

  And let all else sink.

  BARTERVILE

  Let ’em, so I kiss gold;

  The young man’s whore, the saint of him that’s old.[Exeunt.

  Act Two, Scene Three

  ENTER PRIOR, ALPHEGE, HILLARY, and Friars with pruning knives, spades, &c. met by SUBPRIOR and SHACKLE-SOUL.

  SUBPRIOR

  Whither, mad men, run you?

  OMNES

  To our vines.

  SUBPRIOR

  Your vines!

  The tree of sin and shame!This serpent here

  Has with that liquorish poison so set on fire

  The brains of Nicodeme and Sylvester

  That they in drunken rage have stab’d each other.

  PRIOR

  Stab’d!

  SHACKLE-SOUL

  Yes, they bleed a little, but have no harm.

  Their young blood with the grapes being made warm

  They brawl’d and struck, but I help off the blows,

  Yet the subprior says from me their quarrel rose.

  SUBPRIOR

  It did.

  SHACKLE-SOUL

  In very deed, for I’ll not swear,

  It did not, sir; to me your malice bear

  As if that all such mischief done were mine;

  But ‘cause yourself shall see how I repine

  To see vice prosper, pardon me, good Lord Prior,

  If I a tell-tale be of what mine eyes

  Beheld with water in them.Sin will rise

  In holy circles I see sometimes.

  PRIOR

  What sin?

  SUBPRIOR

  What hast thou seen?

  SHACKLE-SOUL

  Would present I had not been,

  But till I utter it, my clogg’d conscience bears

  A man upon a woman.

  OMNES

  Ha!

  SHACKLE-SOUL

  I speak’t in tears;

  Scumbroth, our cook, and a female I beheld

  Kissing in our orchard; on her lips he dwell’d,

  I think, some half hour.

  SUBPRIOR

  Shame to our reverend order!

  A woman in our covent!Sin black as murder.

  PRIOR

  Our cook shall be severely punished; a woman,

  A tempter here!

  OMNES

  Abominable!

  PRIOR

  Rush, thou’lt rebuke sin.

  SHACKLE-SOUL

  Though, my lord, I’m bad,

  I’m not given that way.

  PRIOR

  Let up some plagues invent

  To lay on this lecherous knave.

  SHACKLE-SOUL

  Some light punishment,

  Good my Lord Prior; suppose ‘twere your own fault,

  Whip as you would be whipp’d, the best’s naught.

  SUBPRIOR

  He shall be punish’d and then lose his place.

  PRIOR

  That, sir, shall be as we will.To our vines, away!

  SUBPRIOR

  For shame, give o’er! Dare you profane the day

  That is to holy uses consecrate?

  PRIOR

  Why?What day is this?

  SUBPRIOR

  Lambert the martyr.

  PRIOR

  No matter,

  To vex thee deeper, this whole day we’ll spend

  Only about our vines.

  SUBPRIOR

  You vex not me,

  But heaven; what warrants you to do this?

  PRIOR

  Our will.

  SUBPRIOR

  Thou hast thy will, thy wish thou ne’er shalt have,

  In sight of heaven who sees and punishes

  Men’s black i
mpieties; and in sight of these,

  Sharers in thy full sin, and in his sight

  T’express whose vileness there’s no epithet.

  PRIOR

  No matter what he says, Rush.

  SHACKLE-SOUL

  I’m known what I am.

  SUBPRIOR

  To thee I prophecy, vicious old man to thee,

  Who erst with lift-up-hands and down-bowed knee

  Seemest to have has work in heaven; now, full of spite,

  Only to sate a liquorish appetite;

  Digs our religious wails up, planting there

  Luxurious fruits to pamper belly-cheer;

  For all thy pains to dress it, of this vine

  Thy lustful lips shall never taste the wine.

  PRIOR

  Distracted fool, instead of my just anger

  Thou only hast my pity.Thou prophecy?

  OMNES

  Ha, ha!

  SUBPRIOR

  Laugh on, but since nor prayers prevail nor tears,

  I’ll power my grief into my prince’s ears. [Exit.

  SHACKLE-SOUL

  He’ll go and complain to the king.

  PRIOR

  Let him complain,

  Kings cannot subjects of their food restrain.

  Away![Exeunt.Manet SHACKLE-SOUL.

  SHACKLE-SOUL

  Engender sin with sin; that wins rich heat

  May bring forth lust; lust murder may beget;

  But here strike sail, this bark awhile hale in

  And launch into the deep a brighter sin.

  Ho, Glitterback, ascend to Shackle-Soul,

  To Shackle-Soul ascend, ho Glitterback!

  Thou richest spirit, thrust up thy golden head

  From Hell thus high.When?Art imprisoned

  In miser’s chests so fast thou canst not come?

  Or feast thou thieves or cutpurses?Here be some

  Can save thee from their fingers.When?Arise,

  And dazzle th’approaching night with thy glist’ning eyes.

  GLITTERBACK

  Here.

  A Golden Head ascends.

  SHACKLE-SOUL

  How thou sweatst with coming!Save me those drops,

  Gold’s pure elixir, stilling from thy locks

  Shake from thy brows and hair that golden shower.

  So, get home, quick, to Hell lest Hell grow poor,

  If rich men’s paws once fasten thee, and beware

  I’th’ way thou meetst no lawyers; they’ll pull thee bare.

  Hence, down!

  GLITTERBACK

  I’m gone. [Descendit.

  SHACKLE-SOUL

  Cool night, will call Friar Clement forth anon.

  Angels, be you his strong temptation.

  Wine’s lustful fires him warm not.At this spring,

  Scorn’d by the rest, for him, spread thy gilt wing

  Full in his eye.As he drinks water down

  In streams of avarice, let his weak soul drown.[Exit.

  Act Three, Scene One

  Enter the KING, NARCISSO, BRISCO, SPENDOLA,

  JOVINELLI, RUFFMAN, followed by ASTOLFO.

  ASTOLFO

  I do beseech your Highness, yet turn back

  And comfort the sad lady whose fair eyes

  Are worn away with weeping.

  JOVINELLI

  If her eyes be worn away, what should a man do with a blind wife?Kill her with flies?

  KING

  I cannot abide a woman that’s fond of me.

  SPENDOLA

  Nor I.

  NARCISSO

  I would love a woman, but as I love a walnut, to crack it and peel it, eat the meat, and then throw away the shell.

  JOVINELLI

  Or as noblemen use their great horses, when they are past service, sell ’em to brewers and make ’em drey-horses.So use a woman.

  ASTOLFO

  So, so.

  RUFFMAN

  The Indians are warm without clothes and a man is best at ease without a woman; or if your Highness must needs have one,

  Have factors to but the fairest, dote not any,

  But like the Turk, regard none, yet keep many.

  KING

  You hear the jury’s verdict.

  ASTOLFO

  Whose foreman’s the devil!

  These council thee to thy destruction.

  KING

  Destruction?Why?Though Heaven can abide but one sun, I hope we on earth may love many men’s daughters.Tell Erminhilda so; send her home to the duke her father and tell him too, because the disease of marriage brings the stone with it.I hate a woman; I love not to be cut; enclos’d grounds are too rank.

  RUFFMAN

  Best feeding on the commons.

  ASTOLFO

  Will you not marry this chaste lady then?

  KING

  No, sir, and will you now my reason have?

  A woman is an insatiate grave

  Wherein he’s damn’d that lies buried.

  OMNES

  On, on, away!

  RUFFMAN

  [Aside.] Brave battles!Fight you, but I’ll win the day. [Exeunt.Manet ASTOLFO.

  Enter OCTAVIO and ERMINHILDA

  ERMINHILDA

  I heard the story; tell’t not o’er again.

  ‘Twere cruelty to wound men being half slain.

  OCTAVIO

  ’Tis cruelty too much, and too much shame

  That one of your high birth, youth, beauty, name,

  And virtues shining bright, should hence be sent,

  Like some offender into banishment,

  Abus’d by a king and his luxurious train

  Of parasites, knaves, and fools, a kingdom’s bane.

  For them, by him not car’d for, you came not so,

  But as his bride, his queen, and bedfellow.

  ERMINHILDA

  And yet am neither.From my father’s court

  Came I, being sued by princes too, for this?

  To see him, his subjects scorn and myself his?

  Once thought I that his love had been, as fate,

  Unmoveable, and is’t now turn’d to hate?

  Yes, yes, he’s wavering as the running stream,

  And far more idle than a madman’s dream.

  ASTOLFO

  Send to the duke your father; let him enforce

  Your plighted marriage.

  ERMINHILDA

  Worse than a divorce.

  No, to his eyes since hateful I am grown;

  I’ll leave his court and him, and die unknown.[Exit.

  ASTOLFO

  All runs I see to ruin.

  OCTAVIO

  If he pursue

  These godless courses, best we leave him too;

  That land to itself must a quick downfall bring

  Whose king has lost all but the name of king.[Exeunt.

  Act Three, Scene Two

  Enter SUBPRIOR with an earthen pot and a lanthorn;

  SCUMBROTH with him, with a piece.

  SUBPRIOR

  Get thee to bed, thou foolish man, and sleep.

  SCUMBROTH

  How?Sleep?No, sir, no.I am turn’d a tyrant and cannot sleep.

  I stand sentinel perdu, and somebody dies if I sleep.

  I am posses’d with the devil and cannot sleep.

  SUBPRIOR

  What devil possesses thee?

  SCUMBROTH

  The fencer’s devil, a fighting devil.Rush has committed a murder upon my body, and his carcass shall answer it.The cock of my revenge is up.

  SUBPRIOR

  Murder!What murder?

  SCUMBROTH

  He has taken away my good name, which is flat manslaughter, and half hang’d me, which is as much as a murder.He told the Lord Prior and you that I was kissing a wench.It’s a lie; I give him the lie, and he shall fight with me at single pistol against my caliver.Do I look like a whore-monger?When have you seen a wencher thus hairy as I am?Rush, thou diest for this treason against
my member’s concupiscentiality?

  SUBPRIOR

  Thou would not kill him, would thou?

  SCUMBROTH

  No, but I’ll make him know what ’tis to boil a cook in’s own grease!I am scalding hot; I am charg’d with fury; I carry a heart-burning within me.I kiss a whore?I shall have boys cry out to me now, “Who kiss’d Mary?”No, Rush, Scumbroth shall give thee sugar pellets to eat.I will not be danc’d upon!

  SUBPRIOR

  Let me persuade thy piece of mind to-night:

  Get thee to rest; if Rush have thee belied,

  Rejoice by wrongs to have thy patience tried.

  He shall forgiveness ask thee.

  SCUMBROTH

  Let me have but one blow at’s head with my cleaver i’th’ kitchen and I freely forgive him, or let me bounce at him.

  SUBPRIOR

  These bloody thoughts will damn thee into hell.

  SCUMBROTH

  Do you think so? What becomes of our roaring boys then that stab healths one to another; do you think they will be damn’d up too?

  SUBPRIOR

  I think so, for I know it.Dear son, to prayer;

  Two sins beset thee:murder and despair.

  I charge thee, meet me at my cell anon

  To save thee will I spend my orison.

  In name of Heaven, I charge thee to be gone!

  SCUMBROTH

  Well, sir, the cold water of your council has laid the heat of my fury. He has met with his match but I will shoot off my anger.I will be gone, and why?Look you, because the moon is up and make horns at one of us.As the nobleman’s coach is drawn by four horses, the knights by two, and the cuckold by three, even so am I drawn away with none at all.Vale, bonos noches; I am possess’d still.It buzzes here.Vale.[Exit.

  SUBPRIOR

  Bless’d stay of light, struck there to illuminate

  This world darkened o’er with sin.Thou watchest late

  To guide men’s coming home, showing thereby

  Heaven’s care of us, seeing how we tread awry.

  We have two great lights for midnight and for noon,

  Because black deeds at no time should be done.

  All hail to thee, now my best guide, be given!

  What needs I earth’s candle, having the lamp of heaven?

  Now Benedicite? Where am I?

  Enter SHACKLE-SOUL as RUSH, aloof.

  O, whether am I going?Which way came I?

  Ah, well-a-da,’ I come to fill my pot

  With water not with thee.Thou art misbegot,

  Else wouldst not lie there.What orphan’s blood

  Hast thou suck’d out to make this golden flood?

  None drink this well but I; how is it then

  Thou thus waylay’st me, thief to the soul of man?

  Would some poor wretch, by loss of law undone,

  Had thee!Go do him good; me canst thou none.

  My wholesome cup is poison’d; it flows o’er

  With man’s damnation, gold; drink there no more.

 

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