Complete Dramatic Works of Thomas Dekker

by Thomas Dekker

  The Citie elected sixteene Comitties, to whom the Mannaging of the whole busines was absolutely referred: of which number, foure were Aldermen, the other grauè Commoners.

  There were also Committies appoynted as Ouerseers, and Serueyors of the workes.

  ARTIFICUM OPERARIUM QUE IN HOC TAM CELEBRI APPARATU, SUMMA. SUMMA.

  THE Citie imployed in the Framing, building, and setting vp of their fiue Arches, these officers and worke-men.

  A Clarke that attended on the Committies.

  Two officers that gaue Summons for their meetings. &c.

  A clarke of the Workes.

  Two master-Carpenters.

  Painters.

  Of which nnmber, those that gaue the maine direction, and vndertooke for the whole busines, were only these seauen.

  William Friselfield.

  George Mosse.

  Iohn Knight.

  Paul Isacson.

  Samuell Goodrick.

  Richard Wood.

  George Heron.

  Caruers. 24

  Ouer whom, Stephen Harrison Ioyner was appoynted chiefe; who was the sole Inuentor of the Architecture, and from whom all directions, for so much as belonged to Caruing, Ioyning, Molding, and all other worke in those fiue Pageants of the Citie (Paynting excepted) were set downe.

  Ioyners 80

  Carpenters. 60

  Turners. 6

  Laborers to them. 6

  Sawyers. 12

  Laborers during all the time, and for the day of the Triumph. 70

  Besides these, there were other Artificers, As:

  Plommers, Smythes, Molders.

  TO THE READER.

  READER, YOU MUST vnderstand, that a regard, being had that his Majestie should not be wearied with teadious speeches: A great part of those which are in this Booke set downe, were left vnspoken: So that thou doest here receiue them as they should haue bene deliuered, not as they were. Some errours wander vp and downe in these sheetes, vnder the Printers warrant: which notwithstanding may by thy Authoritie be brought in, and receiue their due Correction. As in F. 2. For, From his owne cleare strength, Read, cleare, straight, &c. And within fewe lines beneath that: In steede of, (Because alluring this tryumph) Read, because that during these, &c. In the Cant. likewise, beginning thus, Shine Titan Shine, In steed of, O this is Had, read, O this is He. And in the sixt staffe: For, Here stayd, Had still. But here Had list not tary. Read for euery Had, hee Other faults pardon, these I thinke are the grosest.

  FINIS.

  The Family of Love (c. 1607)

  In collaboration with Thomas Middleton

  CONTENTS

  Dramatis Personæ

  Preface

  Prologue

  Act I Scene 1.

  Act I Scene 2.

  Act I Scene 3.

  Act II Scene 1.

  Act II Scene 2.

  Act II Scene 3.

  Act II Scene 4.

  Act III Scene 1.

  Act III Scene 2.

  Act III Scene 3.

  Act III Scene 4.

  Act IV Scene 1.

  Act IV Scene 2.

  Act IV Scene 3.

  Act IV Scene 4.

  Act V Scene 1.

  Act V Scene 2.

  Act V Scene 3.

  Epilogue

  Dramatis Personæ

  GLISTER, a doctor of physic

  [Peter] PURGE, a jealous pothecary

  DRYFAT, a merchant, a Brother of the Family

  GERARDINE, a lover

  [Laurence] LIPSALVE }

  [Gregory] GUDGEON } two gallants that only pursue city lechery

  CLUB, a prentice

  VIAL, a servant to Glister

  [SHRIMP] }

  PERIWINKLE } pages to the gallants

  MISTRESS GLISTER

  MISTRESS [Rebecca] PURGE, an Elder in the Family

  MARIA, niece to Glister

  [SERVANTS]

  Preface

  TOO SOON AND too late is this work is published: too soon, in that it was in the press before I had notice of it, by which means some faults may escape in the printing; too late, for that it was not published when the general voice of the people had sealed it for good, and the newness of it made it much more desired than at this time. For plays in this city are like wenches new-fallen to the trade: only desired of your neatest gallants whiles they’re fresh; when they grow stale they must be rented by termers and country chapmen. I know not how this labour will please: sure I am it passed the censure of the stage with a general applause; now whether vox populi be vox Dei or no, that I leave to be tried by the acute judgment of the famous six wits of the city. Farewell.

  Prologue

  If, for opinion hath not blaz’d his fame

  Nor expectation filled the general round,

  You deem his labours slight, you both confound

  Your graver judgment and his merits:

  Impartial hearing fits judicious spirits.

  Nor let the fruit of many an hour fall

  By envy’s tooth or base detraction’s gall,

  Both which are tokens of such abject spirits,

  Which wanting worth themselves hate other merits;

  Or else of such which, once made great by fame,

  Repine at those which seek t’attain the same.

  From both we know all truer judgments free;

  To them our muse with blushing modesty

  Patiently to her entreats their favour;

  Which done, with judgment praise, or else dislike the labour.

  Act I Scene 1.

  A GALLERY IN Glister’s house.

  Enter Glister, his wife, and Maria.

  GLISTER

  Tricks and shows: protestations with men are like tears with women, forgot ere the cheek be dry. Gerardine is a gentleman; his lands be in statutes: ‘a is not for thee, nor thou for him; ‘a is a gallant, and young thoughts be most unconstant.

  MARIA

  Yet young vines yield most wine.

  MISTRESS GLISTER

  But old vines the best. Believe not these great-breeched gallants; they love for profit, not for affection; if ‘a brings thee to a fool’s paradise, ‘a will forsake thee.

  GLISTER

  Which fortune God send my enemy. Love is a cold heat, a bitter sweet, a pleasure full of pain, a huge loss, and no gain. Why shouldst thou love him only ?

  MARIA

  Words cannot force what destiny hath seal’d.

  Who can resist the influence of his stars,

  Or give a reason why ‘a loves or hates,

  Since our affections are not rul’d by will,

  But will by our affections? ’Tis blasphemy

  ‘Gainst love’s most sacred deity, to axe

  Why we do love, since ’tis his only power

  That sways all our affections; all things which be,

  Beasts, birds, men, gods, pay him their fealty.

  GLISTER

  Tut, love is an idle fantasy, bred by desire, nursed by delight, an humour that begins his dominion in Leo the Lion, the sign of the heart, and ends in Aries the Ram, the sign of the head; his power is to stir the blood, pricks up the flesh, fills all the body with a libidinous humour, and is indeed the overture of all ladies. Which to prevent, I have banished Gerardine, your dearly beloved, my house; and as for you, since I am your guardian by my brother’s last will, I will sequester you from all other rooms in my house, save this gallery and your upper chamber, till in discretion I shall find it convenient to enlarge you.

  MARIA

  My body you may circumscribe, confine

  And keep in bounds; but my unlimited love

  Extends itself beyond all circumscription.

  MISTRESS GLISTER

  Believe me, Maria, I have known the natures of divers of these gallants: if they possess the unlimited love of us women in never so ample manner, without the society of the body, I know how soon their love vadeth. Young men’s love is like ivy: it must have somewhat to cleave to, or it n
ever prospers. Love is like fasting-days, but the body is like flesh-days; and ’tis our English gallants’ fashion to prefer a morsel of flesh before all the fasting-days in the whole year.

  Enter Vial.

  GLISTER

  The news with you, Vial?

  VIAL

  And it like your worship, here’s Club, Master Purge the pothecary’s prentice, come to invite you, my mistress and Mistress Maria to supper, and to see Master Gerardine’s will sealed.

  GLISTER

  Tell Club my wife and myself will be there, but Maria shall not come.

  Exit Vial.

  There must be your sweetheart’s parting feast: now ‘a perceives no access to my house, ‘a will to sea. A good riddance: if ‘a returns not, you forsooth are his heir, that’s not much amiss. Yet there may be tricks; I will not be overreached. Come to your chamber, where till my return you shall be in safe custody.

  [Exit with Mistress Glister.]

  MARIA

  O silly men, which seek to keep in awe

  Women’s affections, which can know no law!

  Maria ascends [to the upper stage].

  Act I Scene 2.

  A STREET BEFORE Glister’s house.

  Enter Gerardine, Lipsalve and Gudgeon.

  LIPSALVE

  Now, by the horns of Cupid’s bow, which hath been the bane to many a tall citizen, I think there be no finer fools under heaven than we men when we are lovers. How thou goest crying up and down with thy arms across for a wife; which hadst thou, she’d cross both arms, head and heart. Dost not yet know the old saying, a wife brings but two good days, that is her wedding-day, and death-day?

  GUDGEON

  Believe him, Gerardine, ‘a speaks now gospel; a man may take more wife with one hand than he’s able to put away with ten, G[erardine]. A wife is such a cross, that all married men would most gladly be rid of.

  GERARDINE

  And yet such [a] cross that all bachelors would gladly be creeping to.

  Profane not thus the sacred name of love,

  You libertines, who never knew the joys

  Nor precious thoughts of two consenting hearts.

  LIPSALVE

  Didst ever see the true picture of a lover? I can give thee the hieroglyphic; and this it is: a man standing naked, a wench tickling him on the left side with a feather and pricking him under the right side with a needle. The allegory, as I take, is this: that at the first we are so overjoyed with obtaining a wife, that we conceit no heaven like to the first night’s lodging; and that’s the signification of the left side, for wives always in the night take the left-side place. But sir, now come to the needle on the right side: that’s the day-time, wherein she commands; then, sir, she has a certain thing called tongue, ten times more sharp than a needle, and that at the least displeasure a man must have shot quite through him.

  GUDGEON

  Gramercies, Lipsalve, my neat courtier! But sirrah Gerardine, be thyself sociable and free, leave not thy native soil for a giglot, a wench who in her wit is proud —

  LIPSALVE

  In her smile deceitful —

  GUDGEON

  In her hate revengeable —

  LIPSALVE

  And in nothing but her death acceptable. I’ll tell thee, there’s no creature more desirous of an honest name and worse keeps it, than a woman. Dost hear? Follow this song, and if ever thou forsake thy country for a wagtail, let me be whipped to death with ladies’ hair-laces.

  GERARDINE

  Let’s hear that worthy song, gentle Master Lipsalve.

  LIPSALVE

  Observe:

  [Singing] Now if I list, will I love no more,

  Nor longer wait upon a gill;

  Since every place now yields a wench,

  If one will not, another will;

  And if what I have heard be true,

  Then young and old and all will do.

  How dost thou like this, man?

  GERARDINE

  No more, no more.

  This is the chamber which confines my love,

  This is the abstract of the spacious world.

  Within it holds a gem so rich, so rare,

  That art or nature never yet could set

  A valued price to her invalued worth.

  LIPSALVE

  Unvalued worth? ha, ha, ha! Why, she’s but

  A woman, and they are windy turning vanes:

  Love light as chaff, which when our nourishing grains

  Are winnow’d from them, unconstantly they fly

  At the least wind of passion. A woman’s eye

  Can turn itself with quick dexterity

  And in each wanton glass can comprehend

  Their sundry fancy suited to each [friend].

  Tut, their loves are all compact of levity

  Even like themselves: nil muliere levius.

  GUDGEON

  Tut, man, everyone knows their worth when they are at a rack-rent. In the term-time they bear as great a price as wheat when transportations are —

  Enter Maria at the window.

  GERARDINE

  Peace; let’s draw near the window and listen if we may hear her.

  MARIA

  Debarr’d of liberty! O, that this flesh

  Could like swift-moving thoughts transfer itself

  From place to place, unseen and undissolv’d:

  Then should no iron ribs or churlish flint

  Divide my love and me. Dear Gerardine,

  Despite of chance or guardian’s tyranny,

  I’d move within thy orb and thou in mine.

  LIPSALVE

  She’d move within thy orb, and thou in hers?

  Blood, she talk[s] bawdy to herself. Gudgeon, stand close.

  MARIA

  But in vain do I proclaim my grief,

  When air and walls can yield me no relief.

  GUDGEON

  [Aside to Lipsalve] The walls are the more stony-hearted then.

  LIPSALVE

  [Aside to Gudgeon] Peace, good Gudgeon, gape not so loud.

  MARIA

  Come thou my best companion, thou art sensible

  And canst my wrongs reiterate; thou and I

  Will make some mirth in spite of tyranny.

  The black-brow’d night, drawn in her [pitchy] wain,

  In starry-spangled pride rides now o’er heaven;

  Now is the time when stealing minutes tell

  The stole delight joy’d by all faithful lovers;

  Now loving souls contrive both place and means

  For wished pastimes; only I am pent

  Within the closure of this fatal wall,

  Depriv’d of all my joys.

  GERARDINE

  My dear Maria, be comforted in this:

  The frame of heaven shall sooner cease to move,

  Bright Phoebus’ steeds leave their diurnal race

  And all that is forsake their natural being,

  Ere I forget thy love.

  MARIA

  Who’s that protests so fast?

  GERARDINE

  Thy ever-vowed servant, Gerardine.

  MARIA

  O, by your vows it seems you’d fain get up.

  LIPSALVE

  [Aside to Gudgeon] Ay, and ride too.

  GERARDINE

  I would, most lov’d Maria.

  [GUDGEON]

  [Aside to Lipsalve] I knew it: he that to get up to a fair woman will stick to vow and swear, may be accounted no man.

  MARIA

  But tell me

  Why hast thou chose this hour to visit me,

  Which nor the day nor night can claim, but both

  Or neither? Why in this twilight cam’st thou?

  GERARDINE

  T’ avoid suspicious eyes; I come, dear love,

  To take my last farewell: fitting this hour,

  Which nor bright day will claim nor pitchy night,

  An hour fit to part conjoined souls.

  Since that my native
soil will not afford

  My wish’d and best content, I will forsake it

  And prove more strange to it than it to me.

  In time’s swift course all things shall find event

  Be it good or ill; and destinies do grant

  That most preposterous courses often gain

  What labour and direct proceedings miss.

  MARIA

  Wo’t thou forsake me then?

  GERARDINE

  Let first blest life forsake me! Be constant;

  My absence may procure thy more enlarge

  And then —

  MARIA

  Desire’s conceit is quick, I apprehend thee.

  Be thou as loyal as I constant prove,

  And time shall knit our mutual knot of love:

  Wear this, my love’s true pledge. I need not wish,

  I know thou wo’t return, [n]or will I say

  Thou may’st conceal thyself, being return’d,

  Till I may make escape, and visit thee.

  I prithee, love, attempt not to ascend

  My chamber-window by a [ladder’d] rope.

  Th’ entrance is too narrow, except this post

  Which may with ease, yet that is dangerous:

  I prithee do it not. I hear some call. Farewell:

  My constant love let after-actions tell.

  Exit.

  GERARDINE

  O perfection of women!

  [LIPSALVE]

  A plague of such perfection!

  GERARDINE

  How she woos!

  By negatives shows —

  GUDGEON

  Thee what to do, under colour of dissuasion.

  GERARDINE

  She’s truly virtuous!

  LIPSALVE

  Tut, man, outward apparance is no authentic instance of the inward desires. Women have sharp falcon’s eyes, and can soar aloft; but keep them like falcons from flesh, and they soon stoop to a gaudy lure.

  GERARDINE

  Why, then Huguenot women are admirable angels.

  GUDGEON

  But angels make them admirable devils.