by S A Clayton
She sighs, knowing my logic is semi-sound.
“Wouldn’t your landlord have paid for the hotel?” I thought the same thing, so after Dane left, I went and asked him. It was a resounding “no,” since he’s “not made of money.” When I tell Jenn this tidbit, she just starts groaning about how horrible landlords are in this town.
“Fine, but you better let me know if anything weird happens and I’ll be over there in a heartbeat to kick his ass.”
“Sure Jenn, you’ll be the first person I call.” I hang up the phone and zip up the last suitcase and roll it to the front door where I have the rest of our stuff stacked. I take a deep breath, open the front door, leaving it open as I walk the four feet to Dane’s apartment. I knock, listening for signs of life behind the walnut door, so when I hear nothing, I knock again, finally hearing footfalls on the other side. As it opens, I’m about to berate him for taking so long when all rational thought leaves my brain because standing in front of me is Dane—in just a towel—water dripping down his gloriously bare chest.
“Sorry, I was in the shower.”
I can feel the nod of my head, but no words come out of my mouth because all I can seem to do is take in the tattoos that cover his chest and shoulders, traveling down his arms and ending at his wrist. How did I not notice those before?
“Nel, you okay?”
My eyes dart up to his, which are sparkling with mischief. Shoot, I was totally busted for staring for too long.
“Yup, I’m good.” The blush creeps even further up my chest and up my neck as I avert my eyes to look anywhere but the towel-covered portion of his body.
“You sure? You seem a bit… distracted.” That knowing smirk on his lips makes me want to smack him but at the same time I can’t figure out if I actually want to climb him instead.
“Yeah, I’m fine,” I whisper, the dryness in my throat causing my voice to crack, and that’s when he decides to lean against the doorframe, placing his hand on the top of the towel, lowering it just an inch.
“You know, if you want to see what’s under here, all you have to do is ask. Trust me when I say I’ve been dreaming about that since I left you that night.” His eyes darken and the atmosphere in the room changes.
“I-I didn’t mean to…” I stutter as he holds up his hand, making me stop whatever embarrassing things were about to shoot from my lips.
“Nel, I get why you didn’t text me back. You have Jaxon and a whole life built here. So, I get it. Trust me.”
I tilt my head to the side. How the hell is this man single? His laugh alerts me to the fact that once again, I said that out loud. I really need to stop doing that.
“My life before this was never really relationship inclusive.”
“Sorry, that’s none of my business…” I mutter as that smile returns.
“If I have it my way, it will become your business.” Ignoring my stare, he goes out into the hall, towel still hanging low on his hips, as he picks up my bags from my doorway, and brings them over into his place.
“Are you coming in, or are you going to just stand there and imagine me naked?”
I shake myself out of the daze I put myself in by watching him and step into his apartment.
This is going to be an interesting week.
“So, we’re staying here?” Jaxon asks quietly as I take his hand and lead him through Dane’s front door.
Dane is dressed, thank god, and sitting on the couch off to the left while I take Jaxon into the kitchen.
“But why?”
I take my millionth deep breath since picking Jaxon up from school. Having to repeat yourself to a child is a given, but this is probably the fifth time I’ve explained why we’re staying here, and it still hasn’t sunk in. Before I have to explain it all... again, Dane calls him over to sit next to him on the couch.
Fascinatingly, Jaxon bounds over as if he doesn’t have a care in the world, and plops himself down beside Dane, whose eyes I’ve been avoiding since this morning. But I can’t help but watch with rapture as Dane explains the situation once more to my son, and as Jaxon sits there silently listening to him, I wonder what his secret is.
“What about Christmas?” His eyes grow big and the tears start and my heart sinks into the floor. “How will Santa know where I am?”
The fear in his voice breaks me open as I haul him to me, sitting on the floor as he wraps his arms around my neck.
“Jaxon, I promise that Santa will know exactly where you are.”
Dane’s eyes meet mine across the couch as a sad smile crosses his face. “Hey, little man?” Dane asks, Jaxon turning in my lap. “Why don’t you write Santa a letter explaining where you are? That way he knows…”
Jaxon’s face breaks out into a smile as he looks between Dane and me.
“Mommy, do you think that will work?” The hopeful look in his eyes is the balm I didn’t know I needed.
“Well, it couldn’t hurt!”
With that, he runs down the hall and into the room Dane made up for us and we’re left alone once more.
“Thank you for that.”
His smile returns, and I feel the warmth that always washes over me under his gaze. “He’s a good kid.”
I get up, heading back toward the island and as I lean against the sink, my head down and taking a deep breath. Dane comes up behind me and the second his hands grasp my hips, pulling me gently back against his hard chest, I suppress a whimper, shaking my head.
“I can’t do this,” I mutter, stepping out of his hold and running down the hall only to find Jaxon playing in his new room. Leaning against the doorway, I watch as my son plays with his toys, oblivious to everything that’s going on, and I pray it stays that way.
I need to remember that I’m doing all of this for him. I need to remember that my life can’t have distractions, not when Jaxon’s involved. So I repeat the same mantra over and over in my mind: do not get involved with Dane.
I can handle a week of him… right?
Chapter 10
I really wish I could get the look in her eyes out of my head when she saw me in just a towel. Yet the more time I spend with her in my apartment, the more I want her eyes on me. The more I want to feel her touch again, and the more I want to feel her wrapped around me.
I know something is holding her back. She tells me it’s Jaxon, but being around her, seeing her avoid my eyes, giving me the cold shoulder when I know she feels what I feel, it tells me there’s more to this than just her son.
So, when she walks into the apartment after dropping Jaxon off at school, I haul her against the wall and trap her between my arms.
“Dane, what are you doing?” Her voice isn’t angry like I assumed, it’s worried and maybe a little nervous.
“Something I should have done the second I saw you standing in that hallway last week.”
Just as she opens her mouth to say something, I mold my lips to hers, groaning at the taste as memories of our last kiss come flooding back.
My hands find their way to the base of her skull, pulling her closer as I devour her lips. Her hands grip the back of my shirt, pulling me closer as I savor the feeling of her slowly grinding against me.
“Dane, we can’t…” she groans between kisses, but I don’t listen. My lips travel down the column of her neck, past her collarbone, stopping at the opening of her blouse. “I have to get to work…”
I ignore her, my tongue darting out and reveling in the taste of her skin.
“Call in sick,” I mutter, continuing my ministrations against her sensitive skin.
My hands find their way to her breasts, squeezing them through the thin fabric of her shirt, and I groan as she arches her back, giving me the all-access pass I’ve been craving. I take full advantage, unbuttoning her shirt as I lick my way between the mounds I have been dreaming about for weeks.
&
nbsp; “I’ve fucking dreamed about seeing these…”
Her moans fill the room as my fingers find the snap of her jeans, and just like that, it’s as if cold water is poured over her head. Nellie locks up under my touch as she pushes me away. When our eyes meet, the desire I saw a second ago is gone, replaced with something I’ve never seen from her before… fear.
“What’s wrong?”
She doesn’t answer, walking into the kitchen and buttoning up her blouse as she goes.
“I thought…”
“Yeah, well, you thought wrong.” Her voice is shaking, her fingers desperately trying to do up every small button, but she’s struggling, so I do the only thing I can think of… help her. “What are you doing?” she whispers, her eyes never leaving my hands, which are now expertly doing up her shirt.
“Talk to me,” I plead. “I know you feel this pull between us, I know you remember what our first kiss was like… and the second.” I give her a playful wink, but she just shakes her head. She tries to walk away again, but I stop her, pulling her even closer.
“Dane, we can’t.”
I refused to believe that the universe didn’t put me here in this apartment across the hall from the woman that turned my life upside down with just a kiss. It’s too coincidental.
“Baby…”
She whimpers at the term, and just as I’m about to kiss her again, reminding her exactly how good we feel together, her phone rings. She untangles herself from my arms, quickly looking at the call display before answering.
“Hello, Brian.”
Jealousy I didn’t even know I possessed rears its ugly head as her eyes meet mine with a smile. She mouths my ex right before going back to listening to whatever he’s about to say, and from the look in her eyes, I can tell it’s not good.
“How the hell did you find out?” she mutters, pinching the bridge of her nose. “No, I’m fine, I’m staying with a neighbor.” She looks my way as I wink in her direction and can’t help the sense of satisfaction that comes from seeing the blush rise against her cheeks.
“He’s just a neighbor, Brian, he was home when the flood happened and offered to take us in.”
I growl at the mention of me being “just a neighbor” because if I have it my way, I will become way more than that.
“It’s only for a week,” she sighs as she rolls her eyes at something he says. “No, I am not letting you take Jaxon for the week.” She pauses and then groans in frustration. “Because he’s my son too, we have a custody agreement and you’re working out of state!” She hangs up the phone, closing her eyes and she leans against the wall.
“Everything okay?” I know it’s a dumb question. Her body language alone tells me she’s anything but okay right now.
“Brian doesn’t like the idea of us staying here.”
I give her my best smile, trying to get her to lighten up, but it doesn’t work.
“This isn’t funny, Dane, he’s really pissed.”
“So, let him be pissed.”
“I don’t have time to deal with this.” She looks at her watch, sighing. “I have to go to work.” She grabs her bag off the floor where she dropped it earlier and heads toward the front door.
“I’ll see you tonight.” My voice is strained as I hold back the actual words I want to say to her. At first, I think she missed the tone, but when her eyes meet mine over her shoulder, I can see the glint staring back at me.
“Goodbye, Dane.”
“Bye, gorgeous.” And just like that, she’s gone, and I’m left with a hard-on and a new plan of attack.
Chapter 11
Do I want to be sitting at my desk, rummaging through emails hoping to find something, anything to distract me? No. But right now it’s the only thing I have distracting me from thinking about everything that happened this morning. Was I naive to think living with Dane would be simple? That I wouldn’t want to jump his bones every time he walked into a room? And now Brian is pissed, and honestly, I don’t blame him. If he told me he’d be living with someone I’d never met before and taking our son, I’d have the same reaction. But right now, staying with Dane is my only option. Even if being around him stirs up feelings I haven’t had since the night Brian and I got married.
“Nellie, can I see you in my office for a moment?” Cheryl, my boss, calls from across the room.
I’ve been working as her legal assistant for a few years and although it’s not what I want to do for the rest of my life, it pays my bills and is very rewarding. When I step foot into her office and she motions for me to take a seat, I do, watching as she leans forward onto her desk, her eyes meeting mine.
“Nellie, I need a huge favor.”
I tilt my head to the side, wondering what she could possibly need from me.
“As you may know, Jason was let go last week.”
I suppress a smile because that is such a diplomatic way of saying he got fired. We all know it from the way he stomped out of here yelling about how unfair his life is.
“Well, it turns out that he left quite a mess behind, and there are a bunch of case files that haven’t been loaded into our system yet.”
I close my eyes because I know exactly where this is going.
“Cheryl, you know if I could I would love to help you…” I start, but she holds up her hand to stop me.
“Why did you want to work here?” she asks as I give her a confused look, and when she doesn’t say a word, I take a deep breath.
“I needed a job,” I admit, looking away and taking in all the awards, plaques, and diplomas that adorn her walls. “I had just gotten divorced and I was on my own for the first time in my life and needed stability.”
She nods her head as if she expected that answer. “And why have you stayed?” A knowing smile plays at the edge of her mouth as I sit back, my eyes leaving hers.
“Because I love helping people.”
Our eyes meet once more and she quirks an eyebrow. This woman knows exactly what she’s doing here. She just had me admit that I love helping people while simultaneously asking me for help.
Dang it.
“What exactly do you need to be done, Cheryl?”
She turns behind her desk and pulls out a stack of files that will take at least three hours to complete.
“These are all the files Jason left behind. Most of these needed to be in the system weeks ago…” She obviously sees the panic on my face because she pushes the stack to the side and leans forward. “Nellie, I know you have Jaxon, so if you can’t find anyone to watch him, I will find someone else. I just know I can trust you to get it done right the first time.” She’s an expert at guilt-tripping, and it’s freaking working. Plus, the overtime pay won’t hurt.
“Can I make some calls and get back to you?”
When she agrees, I head back toward my desk and start making some calls. It takes me all of five minutes to get through my list, every one of them busy, including Jenn, who is working late herself. All three of my usual babysitters are busy and as I scroll through my phone, one name pops out and I wonder if I’ve actually gone insane for trying this.
Before I lose my nerve, I press call and before long he answers.
“Hi, Dane, I need a huge favor.”
It’s after eight p.m. and I’m finally done. I put all the files back on Cheryl’s desk for her assistant to file in the morning, turn off my computer, and finally make my way to my car. The streets are lined with Christmas lights, every pole, every lamp, and every window seems to remind me that Christmas is only a week away and I just took my son out of his home.
I pause just behind my car, my hands resting on the trunk as the tears stream down my cheeks. The heaving, all-consuming guilt I’ve been pushing down over the past few days now flows over me like rain, soaking into my skin and burrowing deep into every crevasse of my subconscious.
Am I doing the right thing? Did I just ruin Jaxon’s Christmas by staying at Dane’s? I shake myself out of that train of thought, pushing all of it aside as I take a deep breath and drive myself home. My mind is anywhere but on the road in front of me, and the harder I try to convince myself that I’m a good mom, the louder that evil voice in the back of my head becomes.
By the time I park outside our building, I’m exhausted. The last twelve hours are weighing heavy as I open the front door and head toward the elevator. As the floor ascends, that sinking feeling creeps through my bones. What if Dane didn’t pick up Jaxon? What if something horrible happened while I was gone? I shake the thoughts out of my head because I know deep down that Dane would have called.
Before I open the front door, I take a deep breath preparing myself for the worst, but what I don’t expect is opening the door and being bombarded with the smell of fresh pine. As my eyes adjust to the darkness, I take in the room around me. It’s a completely different room from the one I left this morning, with twinkling lights on every surface. Flashing red, green, orange, and pink lights flash as I close the door behind me. But what has me gasping is the franken-tree that sits in the corner, looking like one of the ugliest Christmas trees I have ever seen in my entire life. There is tinsel everywhere, but what makes me laugh is the fact that it stops halfway up the tree, and I smile, knowing that that is because Jaxon couldn’t reach any higher. The top of the tree looks like an adult decorated it, with color-coordinated decorations and well-placed streamers. But it’s not until I get closer that I stop short, taking in the handcrafted ornaments that I’ve never seen before.
Best Mom Ever is written on cut pieces of round wood, painted to look like a Christmas tree, wreaths, and candy canes. The tears fall silently as my fingers trace the letters, I know Dane wrote out first, so Jaxon could trace them.
It’s the sweetest thing I have ever seen.
“He asked me to make those for you.”