Heart of Conviction: Nathan (Conviction Series Book 1)

by Aly Nichole

  Hailey tilted her head and looked at James. I couldn't help but compare them, now that they were next to each other and there were similarities. They were subtle, but there. They shared a cute button nose and a round chin with a slight dip.

  "Hi," James's voice broke. His eyes scanned over every inch of Hailey.

  "Hi, so you're a doctor like my Nate." Hailey smiled at Nathan. It was adorable how she claimed Nathan.

  Nathan's chest puffed out, and he kissed the top of her head.

  "Yeah," James answered, his eyes soaked up every detail of Hailey.

  I laid in bed curled up. I was uncomfortable, but I couldn't find any other way to lie that didn't hurt. Tears stung in my eyes.

  "Angel." Nathan climbed into my bed.

  I refused to turn and face him. He didn't need to watch me cry again because all I did was cry and cry. I cried for my brother. I bawled because of Trey, and I cried because I was in pain.

  He picked me up and sat me in his lap. His nose was in my hair, and his massive arms wrapped around me in a protective embrace.

  "I thought it went well with him today," Nathan said. I knew it his way to gauge what was wrong with me this time.

  It went very well with James, but it was another thing to add to the pity party I was throwing myself. I cried harder into his chest. "I'm sorry."

  "Why are you sorry?" I heard the confusion in his tone.

  I let out a teary laugh, "I cry all the time."

  He pinched my chin and forced me to look at him. God, I could fall into his eyes. "You have been through so fucking much, and it's not going away overnight. So fucking cry all you want, Angel, I got you."

  I wiped at my cheeks. "I don't want to cry anymore. I want to just forget for a minute." I wanted to be numb; I wanted to feel anything other than sadness, anger, and pain.

  Nathan shifted us so quickly that I squeaked when I bounced on the bed. His eyes darkened as he loomed over me. His eyes moved slowly over my body. I craved to cover myself up.

  "I can give you a distraction."

  My breath hitched. The look he gave me told me exactly what kind of distraction he had in mind. "I'm—" I bit my bottom lip. God, I couldn't tell him even if he was a doctor. He was still my boyfriend.

  Nathan's face softened for a moment before it turned to something darker. "Angel, I told you at the diner I was going to punish you for looking at me like a snack."

  My mouth popped open, and my brain short-circuited.

  He leaned back on his heels, and my legs trapped underneath him. Nathan grabbed the bottom of his shirt and slowly peeled it off.

  My eyes glued to his chest, my fingers itched to trace every line with my tongue. I watched his hand dip into his shorts. The outline of his fingers wrapped around his length was easily visible in his dark athletic shorts.

  "See something you like, Angel." He smirked, and his hand crept under the fabric.

  I nodded my head, unable to stop watching his hand move up and down. My body trembled underneath him. Jesus, I wanted to see him. "Please."

  Nathan tilted his head as his tongue slowly traced his bottom lip. "Please, what, Angel?"

  "I want to see you," I moaned.

  He let out a deep chuckle. "You want to see this." He slowly pushed down his waistband. Nathan's hand wrapped around his thick cock.

  I licked my lips, and my body arched towards him.

  Nathan took his time moving his hand down then up again. The tip was wet from his arousal. "You're going to lie there and watch me jerk myself off, and I'm going to cum all over you gorgeous tits."

  With his free hand, he yanked my tank up to my chin. Nathan's fingers trailed between my breasts.

  My skin tingled underneath his ghostly touch. I rubbed my legs together, needing some kind of release. I felt my arousal, and I cursed. I was unable to do anything but watch.

  Nathan moved his hand faster, and the other hand explored my body. His breath picked up, and the sexiest noises fell from his mouth.

  "Nathan," I moaned, writhing under him. God, I didn't know how hot it was watching.

  His chest glistened under the lights, his eyes closed, and he adjusted himself closer to me but without touching my stitches or arm.

  Nathan gritted his teeth and panted, "I'm coming."

  The warmth of his release hit my chest, and I moaned.

  Nathan caged me between my arms and kissed me with so much heat I melted into a puddle of goo.

  "Fuck, Angel, that was hot. Next time, though, I'm coming inside you." His forehead touched mine, and my good hand went to his back.

  "You better," I murmured. I was horny, but also I was content for the first time in weeks.

  Nathan rolled off me and grabbed some wipes, and cleaned me up. After I pulled my tank down, I curled into his side.

  "You're not crying."

  I snorted. "Thank you."

  My knee bounced up and down. This room grated on my nerves with the off-white color and crappy wooden table and chairs. I didn’t understand why we couldn’t fucking do this shit at Ira’s office.

  I pulled at the roots of my hair. “He needs to hurry.”

  Sade sighed, “He said he was slammed today. And we need to be grateful to him. He has been working hard on not just his cases but mine as well.”

  Sade’s eyes were brighter today, and she only had one moment when she teared up. Thank fuck, I knew it was a process, and I took great pride in finding alternative ways to distract her when she needed it.

  “I just want to get back home.” It was partly true, but I was anxious as fuck. Ira’s call was brief and held no information at all. Just come to the courthouse, meet in conference room B, and click.

  Sade patted my hand. “I know. I’m sure Ira will be in here soon.”

  Ira threw open the door and slammed his bag onto the table, cursing the entire time.

  My brows raised, and I watched as he paced back and forth. “What’s going on?”

  Ira loosened his tie and glared at the wall. “Mr. Benè had attempted to blackmail me, well more like you, nevertheless, blackmail all the same.”

  I gritted my teeth, my hands tightened into fists. That mother fucker. “What has he said exactly?”

  Sade took my hand and clung to it as Ira continued to stare at the wall.

  “He wants me to be his lawyer and negotiate a plea deal in exchange he would sign over all his parental rights to Sadie.” Ira’s voice was devoid of emotion.

  I blew out a breath, “Okay, well can you win sole custody without agreeing to what he wants?”

  The moment the question left my mouth, I fucked up. My brother didn’t know how to lose.

  Ira turned to me, his eyes spitting fire. “Of course I can, you idiot. My anger is not from Trey fucking Benè. My caseload today is pissing me off, and people are idiots who didn't fucking do their jobs or think they know the law better than me.” His nostrils flared, and I winced.

  My brother didn’t like to cuss. With his job, he got judged more harshly if he did. But I wasn’t in the mood for his shit attitude. “You know what, golden boy, fuck off. Sorry that we’re strung a little tight, but you call and say get here and then walk in here like you did fucking got me worried.”

  Ira’s eyes went back to the wall, and he rubbed his forehead. “I didn’t have time to meet you at the office or come to your place, and I didn’t have time on the phone to explain what was happening.”

  “Thank you, Ira. I know how busy you are, and you’ve done so much for me. Thank you.” Sade’s voice was soft, and she thumbed away a few stray tears.

  Ira nodded, unable to make eye contact. “Of course, Sadie. You’re welcome. I informed him it would be hard for him to file for custody when he goes away for manslaughter, attempted manslaughter, and a slew of drug charges and kidnapping.”

  Sade tensed next to me. “Is the DA making me testify?”

  Ira shrugged. “It depends if they offer a plea deal or if they go to trial. If there is a trial, then yes, th
ey will put you on the stand. But the DA in charge will most likely do some sort of deal. He’s weak in the courtroom.”

  “Oh, okay.”

  I knew a deal of any kind would not go over well with Sade. She wanted justice for Zac and for herself. The months of torment, stalking, then the accident. My girl wanted her pound of flesh.

  “The other thing that I needed to discuss with you was Mr. Cornell’s lawyer sent over paperwork to sign away his rights. He said if you want child support, back and going forward, he would pay it. But Mr. Cornell feels he couldn’t guarantee if he will be in her life regularly.”

  My body slumped. After we met with James, I had a good feeling this was what he would do. I wanted to be excited because I was a selfish man, and I wanted Princess as my own, but I couldn’t help but feel it. The sting, one day Hailey will ask, and I wouldn’t lie to her. And I worried she would feel the same rejection I felt when I learned about my sperm donor, Tyler, and I didn’t want that for her.

  I wrapped my arm around Sade, lending her my strength. She said she hoped he would stick around and be a figure in Princess’s life. Another person she could turn to if she felt alone.

  “So he’s just — abandoning her?” Her voice wavered as she stared at Ira.

  My heart lurched out of my chest. God fucking damn it.

  Ira finally turned his gaze on Sade. “No, he’s a man that knows his limits. And now Hailey won’t ever feel guilty when she calls Nathan Dad or Daddy.”

  Ira and I always had this argument. He never felt rejected when our real dad left us in the dust. Ira was always the practical one and minimalist. Tyler was not worth his time or effort, and because he didn’t want us, it opened the door for Liam to come and be the man they needed. And no one could tell my brother any different.

  I sighed. “Ira, not everyone feels the way you do.”

  Ira frowned and shook his head. “And not everyone wants to wallow on a loss that isn’t a fucking loss.”

  I felt Sade’s eyes bounce back and forth between us. Some things never change with age. “Angel, what would you like to do about child support?” I asked to change the subject.

  Sade pulled at her bottom lip with her teeth. “I want nothing. He can’t throw money to ease his guilt. I just want to be able to contact him if Hailey ever has questions. James can be the one to explain.”

  Ira nodded. “Okay, and the DA should contact you soon about the decision made for your case.”

  “Okay, thank you, Ira.” Sade stood up and attempted to hug my brother.

  My brother stiffened at the contact, and I smirked. The man could only handle certain affections from certain people. And my girl wasn’t in the circle just yet.

  Ira cleared his throat and patted her shoulder. “You’re welcome. I will see you both for Sunday dinner.”

  I pushed the tablet away from me and thumped my head on the desk. I knew I needed to figure out how to lessen my schedule. It gutted me thinking I might have to stop taking new patients, but I wanted more time with Sade and the kids.

  Sade had been more pensive since our meeting with Ira. I didn’t know what was going on in her head, but I hoped we could talk about it when she was ready.

  Fuck, I wanted to be home. Home, not my condo that had been empty except Masen and Mickey, who were trying to buy houses. But Sade’s place, where my girls were, and my RJ.

  “Dr. Valentine, do you have a moment to do a consult on the psych floor?”

  I tilted my head, keeping it on the cool surface of the communal nurse’s desk. My eyes squinted at her. I thought I hid well enough, but I guess not. I hated that I had to do a rotation here once a month to keep my privileges.

  The nurse fidgeted under my stare.

  “What exactly am I consulting on?”

  She clasped her hands together. “I worry that a woman is pregnant and too scared to say. I thought maybe you could work your magic.”

  I groaned. One hour, I had one hour left. “All right.”

  They dedicated the top floor to psych patients. I had only been here twice in the few years I’ve been with the hospital. It had dull colors, and no one ever wore a damn smile.

  I shivered, making my way to the reception desk where a burly man sat with one eyebrow raised at me.

  “They asked me to come speak with a woman who may be pregnant.”

  He stood and waved for me to follow.

  We walked down the corridor, and I stumbled, and my feet cemented to the floor.

  She was leaning against the window, looking out. Her hair was longer than the last time I saw her. Sara. My throat closed up, and I moved my way towards her. A gust of air escaped my lungs. I was relieved to see her here. We all worried we would get the call.

  “Sara.”

  Her head jerked away from the window, and her dark eyes enlarged. “Nate.”

  All the anger I had towards her evaporated. I took three steps and pulled her into my arms. “Thank fuck, you’re okay.”

  Maybe it was watching Sade lose her brother that made me want to hold my sister a little tighter. But all the anger and frustration I had was gone, and concern and relief flooded my body.

  “I’m sorry, Nate, but I’m trying now.” Her voice shook as her arms hugged me tighter.

  I held onto her a little longer, and I promised her I would check on her and made sure she had my number.

  Sade was sitting on the couch. Her hair was loose around her face, and she looked peaceful.

  I flopped down next to her and took her hand in mine. “Sara’s in rehab.”

  She took a sharp breath. “That’s amazing.”

  I nodded and pulled her into my lap and buried my face in her hair, sucking up her scent and warmth. She was everything and more.

  “Let me buy us a house. I want to come home to you and the kids every day for the rest of my life. I want to sit on the couch like this till my last breath. Let me buy us a house.”

  I held my breath, waiting for her to reject my offer. Tell me it’s too soon.

  Sade pulled away just enough to look me in the eye. “I love you, Nathan. Buy us a home.”

  Epilogue

  Nathan

  I stared at the box full of Zombie-Hero, and Masen Valentine is my Uncle’s shirts. There had to be thirty shirts in all colors and would fit Princess perfectly. And she would only wear them. Not the nice clothes Sade and I shopped for.

  I felt Sade come up from behind me and snort. “I love your brother. Does this stuff for her, but also I could strangle him.”

  “You wait, I’ll get even with the little fucker.” Masen would eventually get a girl and have a kid.

  Sade’s lips pressed to my arm. I watched her walk away with a slight sway. God, I couldn’t believe she agreed to live with and buy a place. I wanted the kids to have a yard to play in and get a dog to run around with. The dream I thought was long gone.

  It wasn’t easy. Sade confessed she worried I was trying to replace Trisha and Felicity with them. Nothing was further from the truth. It didn’t help when Trey went to trial. He spewed all kinds of shit. He took a plea deal, and Ira got him to give up his rights to RJ.

  It was rough. She took back moving in with me and tried to shut me out again. I planted my ass on the couch and refused to let her.

  “Babe, if you want Hailey to wear anything else, you might want to hide the box before we go pick her up.” Sade’s voice pulled me out of my thoughts.

  “Yeah, I’ll bury it under the kitchen boxes.”

  House hunting was complicated and frustrating. Then my mom and dad took it out of our hands and told us they bought us a house as a present.

  Sade refused, and partially still refused, and Dad was getting a kick out of it. But slowly, we had been packing things up for our new place. I figured by the time we had it packed, she would be ready to live in our new house.

  It wasn’t a mansion size like my parents’ place, but it was larger than Sade had agreed to when we started negotiating.

  “Do you
know who all is coming for dinner Sunday?” Sade asked.

  I hummed, “Masen and Maddi are of town, and Wyatt’s still adjusting to MIT, but everyone else will be there.”

  Family dinner had been a big thing for Sade for the last couple of months. My mom and Red took her under their wing and showed her what family was.

  It fucking warmed my heart seeing her adjusting to my family and being more involved. Sade left her job and started working under Red and talked about going back to school to become a nurse.

  I turned and looked at my girl. She had more life in her since the accident. Her arm was out of her cast, giving her the independence she craved after being hurt. She was doing a little dance as she picked up RJ’s toys and clothes I had lying around from my earlier shopping trip.

  “Angel,” I called to her. She turned, her lips pulled up on the one side. Fuck, she was my heart. “I love you.”

  The next time all of my siblings were in one place, I would put the ring I had hidden away to good use.

  Sade’s face flushed. “Love you too, Nathan.”

  Acknowledgments

  I need to thank my beta readers for going over and helping me fine tune my writing. Sarah, Dawn, Christy! You guys were freakling amazing thank you.

  And thank you Black Widow Designs, you made a kick-ass cover and formatted my book even though I waited to the last minute. Thank you!

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  What’s Next

  Mind Of Conviction