Shadowheart

by Laura Kinsale

  At the cliff’s rim, arising suddenly from the raw rocks, a smooth pedestal of limestone lay uprooted from the ground. Putting her hand upon it to steady herself, she looked down into a vertical chasm at dolphins playing in the jewel-blue water of the narrow inlet below.

  She glanced back, upward to the castle itself mounting the highest point of the island. The slender, fantastic spires of black stone seemed to dazzle in the afternoon sunlight, gleaming like the Raven’s cloak. With deliberate insolence, she dropped the bundle of cheese and fruit on the ground, sitting down against the ruined block. It made an excellent windbreak, commanding a view of the crevice and inlet.

  She pressed her hands over her hot cheeks. For a long while she sat in this strange and magnificent place between the sea cliffs and the sky. As a girl she had wandered wild places, sought them out when she was troubled or distressed, drawn there by that unwomanly side of her nature that Cara deplored. She took some melancholy consolation in the emptiness, in the vast prospect that revealed every hue of nature before her.

  She put her fingers to her eyes. Green fool that she was, she had thought the Raven fascinating—dangerous—God save her, she had thought him almost alluring. For a deluded hour she had even believed she had found an ally, that she might make of him a friend.

  Shame flooded her. Shame for the loss of her honor, shame for the word that Lady Beatrice would carry back to England for Raymond and Cara and everyone at court to hear—shame and anger that for even a moment she had trusted him. Bargain, would she? Bargain with a treacherous outlaw, her sworn enemy; even her sister had despised him, by his own admission, but Elayne had not had wit enough to wonder why.

  And she knew why she had not wondered. Because she was frail. Because she was weak. Because he was so beautiful and mysterious that he had blinded her with it. And even now she felt the place he had touched her throat, even now she closed her eyes and ached with a hot, nameless ache when she thought of it.

  She leaned down with her skirt about her knees, hiding her face from the world. She rocked back and forth with her eyes squeezed shut, trying to erase from her mind the image of him in the dawn light, the figure of black and silver, the trace of a fleeting smile. Abruptly she took out her journal and ink-horn. In Libushe’s language she penned an insulting description of Il Corvo, in unfettered, grisly detail, making him a good degree more hideous and rough than was truthful.

  She gazed out at the horizon for a few moments, then dared to leaf back through the pages to the poems she had written to Raymond.

  She bit her lip. He would never hear her poems, never laugh with her, never kiss her or call her his foolish darling, his little cat, again. Until this moment, the truth of it had not penetrated her heart. It had seemed that somehow, someway, she would return to him. She stared down into the ravine and wondered if she flung herself off might she turn into a dolphin and swim away, as Libushe had once told her of a girl who transformed into a seal and vanished into the misted sea.

  She stood up. For a long, dreadful moment she thought of it.

  She thought of the fall, the rocks...the water.

  She had not the nerve.

  Bowing her head, she turned from the edge—and gave a low cry at the sight of a white dog tugging at her forgotten bundle of food. The animal startled and looked up at her, no more than a large puppy, almond-shaped black eyes in a downy white face. But it didn’t retreat or snap as she grabbed the bundle away, only stood and stared up at her hopefully.

  "A fine thief!" she said gently, unable to scold such a sweet face. "Where’s your family?"

  The puppy moved toward her, sniffing at her hem. It leaped up and rested its big paws on her thighs, grinning. Clearly it was no wild animal. She thought it must be from a litter of the great white dogs that guarded the castle, although as young bitch began to play with the folds of Elayne’s gown, it had none of the majestic dignity of those beasts. She was more a disgraceful tumble of white fluff, wriggling and turning her belly up to invite a pet.

  Elayne reached into her bundle and broke off some cheese. The puppy rolled upright and took it politely, nibbling the tidbit from her fingers. Elayne sat down, biting into the sweet plums herself. After they had devoured all there was, she wiped juice from the corner of her mouth and sat with the warm weight of the puppy in her lap. Her head ached. She supposed Il Corvo would be searching for her.

  Let him search. Let him have his wedding feast without a bride.

  It was quiet here, and so empty. There was no one to order her or caution her or arrange her future with an uncaring snap of their fingers. There was only the young dog, a friend with no demand or desire but to nestle close and share a meal. Elayne bent her head and rested her cheek on fur softer than any costly pelt, smiling in her misery.

  FIVE

  When she opened her eyes again, it was to see the pirate sitting on a rock, examining the pages of her journal by the angled pink light of the setting sun. The white puppy was playing with the tip of his boot. She sat up quickly as she realized what he had in his hands. "That’s mine!"

  He was dressed differently now, plainly, in black hose and a simple white shirt belted with silver and onyx, his sleeves pushed up past his elbows. His hair fell loose about his shoulders, longer and blacker than any Christian man’s should be.

  "Then it’s you who pines so sweetly for this Raymond," he said.

  It was as if his dark eyes saw through her body and into her past and future. She evaded the look, unsure if it was mock or menace in his voice. "Raymond?" she mumbled. "He is—a friend."

  The corner of the pirate’s mouth lifted in a knowing smile.

  "Very well!" she exclaimed. "Why ask? If you perceive so much by your magic, then I have no secrets!"

  "Mere speculation and deduction, Lady Elena." He smiled again. "But here—" He looked down at a page. "Am I truly such an ugly, uncouth fellow?"

  "You can read it!" she said sullenly. "How can you read it?"

  "I make a study of alien texts," the Raven said. He flipped through pages of her journal lightly. "As any philosopher must."

  "Philosopher! A mere pirate, who forces himself on unwilling maids."

  He tapped the toe of his boot back and forth as the puppy pounced on it happily. "Alas, no wonder you describe me in such unflattering terms, if that’s what you believe."

  Elayne took a deep breath. She twisted the gold band around her finger. "Then you won’t be surprised if I don’t attend your celebration feast, since—whatever you may claim—I don’t believe that we’re truly wed."

  "Before you cast off my ring, Lady Elena," he said gently, "let me survey your situation for you. You have two choices. You may accept me as your husband, or you may be sold to some kind Moor who treats his concubines better than his wives, and no one in Christendom will lay eyes upon you again."

  Elayne brushed a thick strand of hair back from her cheek. "How should I believe that? The girl Margaret declares that you’d never sell anyone as a slave."

  "Very well—" He stood up. "If you wish to stake your life upon a maidservant’s notion of me."

  The puppy bumbled over to Elayne. She busied herself in petting it. The pup put its paws on her knee, licking her fingers. Its fur was the softest thing she had ever touched.

  Elayne leaned over the pup while it nosed her face. "Are you a lost princess?" she whispered. "Did you refuse to do what you’re told?"

  The puppy bit her nose. She drew back with a yelp. The pup jumped away and then came back to chew at the hem of her robe. "Ever naive," he said dryly.

  "Avoi," she said, touching her nose and finding blood on her finger. "She’s only a baby."

  "Do you always trust what appears innocent?"

  Elayne daubed at her nose with her sleeve. "I don’t ascribe deep devices to puppies, it’s true."

  He squinted at her face. "I hope it doesn’t leave a scar. It would lessen your value when I sell you to the Saracens."

  She drew her hem away from the puppy�
�s teeth as she stood. The sun was going down behind a bank of dark clouds, turning everything to brilliant golden light and harsh shadow. His loose white sleeves billowed in the dying breeze.

  "May I have my book?" she asked, holding out her hand.

  Somewhat to her surprise, he returned the journal without dispute. "How came you to write in that tongue?" he asked.

  "Lady Melanthe sent a wisewoman," Elayne said shortly. "She taught me of many things."

  "You seem to have made a broad study indeed. Wide learning isn’t common in a maiden."

  "Perhaps it isn’t common, but there’s nothing wrong with learning."

  "No, it is excellent," he said, nodding. "I hope you’ll continue apace. Make yourself free of my books and manuscripts. They’re full of dust and interesting ideas."

  She wasn’t accustomed to approval of her studies. Nor to men who encouraged her to entertain interesting ideas. "Well," she said, "for such time as I remain here, I shall."

  "Good. I doubt you’ll find much to read in the harem." He gave her a dark-eyed look. "But at least you’ll have ample hours of leisure to meditate on your vast knowledge, between carnal visits from your master."

  Elayne felt the blood rising to her face. She had no memory of what he had done, but Libushe had emphatically explained to her, for her protection, just what a woman could expect from a man. She wished that he would not be so comely in his body and face as he stood with his boot braced against an overturned block of stone. It made her angrier at him still, that he wasn’t abhorrent, but made her feel hot and willing to be touched by him.

  As ever, he seemed to see into her mind. "We’ll endeavor to find you a buyer not so ugly as myself," he said. "But I can make no certain promises."

  She turned away, pulling her skirt free of the branch of a windswept bush. "You mock, but it was fiendish of you to do what you did. To put some potion in my drink, and then to—" She pursed her lips and broke off a piece of the branch. "To humiliate me." She twisted the stick between her hands until it cracked and splintered. "And then to announce it before Lady Beatrice and those people, so she’ll carry the news of it to England, and tell them that I—that I desired it."

  The clouds on the horizon were darkening, rising over the sun. A sharp puff of renewed wind blustered across the headland.

  "You told me that you didn’t want the Riata," he said. "You begged me to keep you here. Would you have consented to wed me, if I’d asked?"

  She whirled around. "No."

  "So—I merely spared our recital of that chapter, then." He shook his head. "Lady Elena. Iniquitous I may be, I don’t deny it, but you’d be wise rather to reconcile yourself and see what you can make of it, than to struggle against me like some doomed moth in a spider’s web."

  "Reconcile myself to ravishment by an outlaw? What good end could I make of that?"

  "Alas, the only subject that your teachers seem to have neglected is your own history." He leaned his shoulder against the broad, broken pedestal of stone and tossed a stick for the puppy to chase. "And how does my lady Cara appear in these latter days? Is she quite beautiful?"

  Elayne tucked her chin at his sudden change of direction. "Cara? She appears as any matron in good health and generous flesh, I suppose."

  "Become a fine English peasant, has she? And what of that churl she chose to wed?"

  "Sir Guy is a knight, not a churl."

  The Raven gave a flick of his hand. "Nothing but a varlet with the dirt still on him. It’s too bad you were obliged to reside in such company as would only grace a sheep sty. No doubt that’s why you conceived this debased affection for some common English fellow."

  Elayne sucked in a sharp breath. "Debased! How dare you!"

  He snorted, tweaking the stick from the puppy’s mouth in spite of its quick attempts at evasion. "No? For what purpose did you want him? Not marriage, in the name of God."

  "Of course I wanted marriage!" she said. "I love him."

  He looked at her as if she were mad. "You’re Monteverde."

  "What of it? Cara always said I might marry a man I could love, and Lady Melanthe, too."

  "Bah, you’d never disgrace the name of Monteverde in that manner!" He hurled the stick. The pup bounded away after it, sniffing among the rocks. "I wouldn’t have allowed it."

  "You!" She stared at him. "What do you care?"

  "The devil take your sister and Melanthe! They knew I didn’t save your skin and carry you five hundred leagues to marry some common English muck bucket!"

  "Save me?" she echoed in bewilderment. "You haven’t saved me—"

  "Ignorant infant! They’ve told you naught in truth, have they? You were toddling poison-bait for the Riata in Monteverde. The last of your line still there, in their hands, while they knew Melanthe had lied to them till her tongue turned black. She didn’t get you out of there. You’re alive by my hand—I’m the one who brought you out and conveyed you safe to your sister’s godforsaken mud pit in the woods. Little though you seem to know or remember of it." His lip curled. "Though I apprehend that Melanthe and your sniveling sister had their reasons enough to keep you unwitting."

  "What raving is this?" Elayne sputtered. "I don’t believe you!"

  "Did you think you’d been wafted there upon some angel’s wings? I smuggled you out of the Riata fortress in a laundry basket, and a bold child you were, too, at a bare six years. We crossed the mountains with a dog for a guide—one just such as this, the white guardians of the flocks—I lost the way and the rain turned to ice; I carried you until I thought we’d both be dead. But that dog came to you, and you held onto it, and it took us. You don’t remember." He shook his head. "You don’t remember any of it?"

  "No, I’ve never—"

  But she looked at him as he stood in the last of the evening light, the fading sun on his black hair and flawless face. With a terrible insight, she saw too clearly what she had struggled to deny. Even curved in disgust, his mouth was well-formed; his features lit with real emotion more beautiful than ever—so like her dark angel, so painfully familiar.

  "It’s not possible," she said. She shook her head furiously. That a pirate in the midst of the vast sea would know her past—know more of it than she did herself. She didn’t want to give credence to what he said, and yet...

  And yet...

  "No one ever said aught of anyone such as you!" she exclaimed heatedly.

  "No, I doubt your sister would have the name of Allegreto Navona on her lips."

  "You make no sense. You said me yourself the house of Navona was our enemy."

  "Yes," he said. "Your mortal foe."

  "Then why would you go to such length for me?" she demanded. "Why?"

  "Oh, for love," he said with a sneer. "I supposed myself in love with your sister."

  Elayne’s mouth dropped open. "With Cara?"

  He posed in an ironic bow.

  "No," she said. "I don’t believe it! She’d be terrified of you."

  "She was." He looked out at the horizon blazing in gold and pink above the storm bank. "She was," he repeated slowly.

  "Cara?" Elayne could not even imagine such a thing. Cara, who seemed so sedate; so plump and wifely and bound to Savernake and her home. A pirate had loved her. This pirate, this angel-demon man with his magic and life of hazard. "I cannot conceive of it," she said faintly.

  "No more can I conceive how you want some English peasant in your bed," he said. "But then, so did your sister. Perhaps it’s some taint in your mother’s blood."

  The manner in which he said it was like a slap across the face. Elayne drew herself straight. "Sir Guy is no peasant, nor Raymond. And who are you, after all?"

  "Your husband now, sweeting. You may call me Allegreto—the bastard son of Gian Navona," he said, "since you seem so woefully untutored in your own history."

  "Whoever Gian Navona might be."

  "A man you may thank the merciful Lord God you could dare to forget. Your sister and Lady Melanthe are in full debt to me for the
ir easeful lives today." He smiled bitterly. "If I’d done my father’s bidding, your sister would have had me after all, instead of her English commoner, and Lord Ruadrik would be long rotting in his grave."

  "I don’t believe it! I don’t! How can all this you say be so?"

  "No one told you, so you think it can’t be so? Then perhaps you don’t know that your faithless Melanthe was promised to wed my father after Ligurio died," he said. "But she was so bold as to run away to England, and foolish enough to find a husband there instead. So Gian ordered me to poison her inconvenient Ruadrik, to free her from that bond."

  "Poison him!" she gasped.

  "Poison him to death. But Lord Ruadrik lives, does he not? And he ought to go on his knees every night in dread thanks to me." The pirate touched his dagger, his fingers sliding over the jeweled haft. "My father was not pleased. He left me to drown in a stone well after he found I hadn’t done his will with Melanthe’s knight."

  "Sweet Mary," she breathed.

  "I betrayed him." He shrugged and rested back against the stone pedestal. He drew the dagger, sending it into a shining spin around his hand and catching it as if it were a plaything. "I was brought up to do exactly as he bid me—to slay in silence, from behind, so that no one knows where or whence it comes." He gazed at the tip of the blade. "It was said I murdered him myself."

  She thought of him standing at Lady Beatrice’s back, of his casual touch on the knife. She felt the powerful presence of her dark and mysterious angel, and knew now why she’d never spoken of those dreams to Cara.

  "Did you?" she whispered.

  "No." His eyes did not meet hers. He turned the dagger in his palm. "In truth, I doubt I could have killed him. I loved him. I was terrified of him." He sheathed the knife. "He was my father."