DEREK'S MATCH

by Jami Gallardo

  I was feeling tired during the ride but as soon as the beach comes into view, I’m suddenly wide awake. We park close to the Santa Monica Pier, but we don’t go there since it’s crowded with people. The lights of the Ferris wheel look so pretty in the dark.

  “Oh my god,” I say as we get out of the car.

  The sound of the waves is like music to my ears. I’ve missed the beach so much and, while this is not my Newport Beach, it’s just as satisfying.

  Derek smiles, looking amused. “You like the beach?”

  “Are you kidding? I love it. Come on!” I say reaching for his hand and pulling him forward.

  It’s dark but I’ve always thought the beach is better at night. There’s less people and it’s more relaxing. I’m so excited to be here. I kick off my shoes as soon as we get close to the water. I wish I wasn’t wearing jeans but that doesn’t stop me from walking into the water. The water rises just below my knees.

  “You know, I would’ve brought you here first if I would’ve known it was going to make you this happy,” Derek says as he stands behind me. His arms go around my waist from behind and I let him because he’s making this moment even better. I allow my head to rest back against his shoulder as I stare at the water and sky. There are a couple stars. Even the weather is perfect.

  It’s been a long day. This is the perfect way to end it.

  “I forgot how much I missed it,” I say as I stare at it. “My parents own an oceanside inn so I’ve always lived close to the ocean.”

  “Oh, I didn’t know that. You’re going to have to tell me the name so I can stay there whenever I’m in Newport.”

  I pull myself away and roll my eyes at him.

  “What?” He asks as he follows me out of the water.

  “It’s not your type of luxury hotels,” I say as I sit down on the sand, facing the ocean.

  “I’m not always all about luxury, Gin,” He says as he sits down next to me, close enough for our arms to touch.

  “That’s hard to believe.”

  “Come here,” He says as he pulls me by the arm.

  “What are you doing?” I laugh.

  “I want you close to me.” He wraps his arm around my waist and pulls me so that I’m sitting in between his legs. His knees are propped up on either side of me and I rest my back against his chest. His cheek brushes against the right side of my face. It’s such an intimate position and I like it. The fact that we’re sitting like this on the beach just makes it all better.

  “You’re very smooth, Derek Collins.” I smile at the ocean.

  “You’re damn right I am,” He says making me smile.

  “I know you think I’m some stuck up son of a bitch,” He says after a moment. “But I’m not like that…all the time.”

  I pull my head back against his shoulder so I can look up at him. “I don’t think that,” I say and he looks down at me and raises an eyebrow. “All the time.” I add with a smile and he chuckles.

  Then he stares straight ahead at the ocean. He suddenly looks serious. “I’ve been doing this since I was sixteen,” He says thoughtfully. “Nobody taught me how to deal with fame or money.” He pauses. “I spent most of the time alone, away from my family. It all just happened so quickly. It feels like it’s still happening so quickly.” He looks at me. The moonlight makes his blue eyes shine. Gosh. He’s so gorgeous. “It’s been so fucking hard and it still is sometimes. Some days are just easier than others. I try my best.” He shrugs.

  I don’t say anything for a moment. This is the first time Derek Collins is being vulnerable. I suddenly feel bad for calling him an asshole numerous times. I guess I thought he was a shallow asshole with no feelings. I was wrong. I realize that he’s had a lonely life. Being away from your family and your home is not easy. I know that now and he’s been doing this since he was sixteen.

  I reach for his hand and play with his fingers on my lap. “Now you’re making me feel bad for calling you an asshole.”

  I feel his smile on the back of my head. “Good.”

  “You love what you do though, right?”

  “Oh yes,” He says. “I loved modeling when I started back in my teens. I know it sounds obnoxious but I’ve always been so good at it without even trying. Many struggle to give the camera the right pose or look but that’s never been the case with me. I’m just good.”

  I roll my eyes at the ocean. “You said you loved it. You don’t love it anymore?”

  “I do. I just enjoy acting more now. It started off as a way to change things up when modeling become so easy, it was almost boring. Acting is challenging and different. I fucking love it.”

  He presses his lips on my temple and it makes me feel tingles in my stomach. He does it so naturally and casually, completely unaware of the way it’s making me feel. That’s the first time he’s kissed me. It’s not on the lips but it counts. It’s still a kiss, his lips are on my skin. I know then that I’m going to remember this night for the rest of my life.

  Smooth. Very smooth.

  “Uh,” I clear my throat. “May I ask what the casting you did this week was for? Or is it a secret?”

  “It’s a secret,” He says. “But I’ll tell you only because I like you.” He grins. “It was for a stripper role in a movie.”

  My eyes widen and I turn my head to look at him. “Stripper? Really?”

  He smirks at me. “Yes.”

  “You?”

  He shakes his head with a chuckle. “Yes, me. I’ve got the body for it, Gin, don’t look so surprised.”

  I laugh nervously. “So what is it about?”

  “I’ll know more about it when I get the role.”

  “You sound very confident.”

  “I’m perfect for it,” He says and his lips brush against my cheek. “Wouldn’t you agree?” He asks in a low voice.

  I gulp, feeling thankful he can’t see my face right now. “I wouldn't know.”

  “You want to find out?” He asks.

  Yes.

  “No,” I say in a small voice then I turn look at him. “I’m not going to have sex with you tonight, Derek.”

  “Really? I wish you would’ve told me when I invited you to come then I wouldn’t have spent the whole day trying to get you to sleep with me,” He says amusedly, his voice drips with sarcasm.

  I purse my lips in surprise. “Okay, fair enough.”

  He smiles. “I didn’t invite you here to have sex, Gin. I know you’re not that type of girl.”

  “Good. I’m glad you know that.”

  His arm goes around my waist and he presses me closer to him. God. It feels so good to be right here, in between his legs, in his arms with his chest pressed against my back. There is no other place I’d rather be than right here, with him.

  “It just makes me like you even more,” He says in a low voice. His lips move against my ear as he speaks. “Now, don’t get me wrong, Gin. I would love to be with you and it didn’t go unnoticed that you said you wouldn’t sleep with me tonight. I’m going to cling on to that little hope.”

  My heart is beating hard against my chest. I wonder if he can hear it. My mouth is dry and I don’t even realize that I stopped breathing until I take a deep breath. All he did was speak seductively to me and my body responds this way? This is scary. Very scary.

  “You really need to stop saying things like that to me.”

  “Why?” He asks, his lips brush against my temple.

  “You know why.”

  “No, I don’t. Please tell me.”

  I stare at the ocean, thoughtfully. “How many other girls have you had in between your legs, Derek? How many other girls have you wooed to bed?” I turn my head to look at him but he doesn’t say anything. I suddenly feel angry and I don’t even know why. Why did I bring these thoughts to my head?

  I sigh then I stand up. “Exactly.”

  “Hey, Gin.” Derek calls as he stands up then he reaches for my hand. He pulls me back to him and waits for me to look at him. “I know
you think I’m some sort of player that sleeps with a different girl every night.”

  I look at him. “You’re really trying to convince me that you don’t?”

  “Yes, because I don’t.” He insists and I look away, annoyed. “No, Gin, look at me,” He says and I meet his eyes again. “Yes, I flirt with a lot with women but I don’t take them to bed. I’m careful about who I sleep with.” His eyes soften. “I can count the women I’ve been with in one hand. I’m not the playboy the press makes me look like I am.”

  I look at him for a moment, trying to decide whether I believe him or not. I don’t even know why I decided to get mad about this right now. The thoughts of him having another woman in between his legs and holding her like he was holding me—they were too unpleasant. But I’m not his girlfriend. I have no reason to get angry about it just like he has no obligation to be giving me an explanation right now. Yet he is.

  “You can have any woman you want, Derek,” I say and the realization hurts a bit. “It’s none of my business who you sleep with.”

  “You’re right. I can have any woman I want,” He says and his voice is factual, not obnoxious. “But, fuck, I’ve never worked this hard to get one to like me.”

  I roll my eyes at him. “You know I like you.”

  A faint smile appears on his lips. “It’s nice to hear you say it.” His hand goes up and he touches my chin with his thumb in soft strokes. That touch alone sends tingles all the way down to my toes. “Be my girlfriend, Gin.”

  “No.” I whisper.

  His eyes search mine. “You like me and I like you. What reason is there for you to say no?”

  I bite my lower lip, nervously. “You want the truth?”

  He half smiles. “I wouldn’t expect anything else from you.”

  I look away then look back up at him. “It’s scary, Derek. You—you’re too much. You’re too goofy. You’re too handsome. You’re too famous. You’re too wanted by everyone else in this world. It…it’s hard to believe that out of all the women—models and actresses—you can have, you ask me to be your girlfriend.”

  “Well, believe it, because it’s real. This is happening.”

  I shake my head with a smile. “I’m not going to say yes right now.”

  “Right now.” He repeats then grins. “I can work with right now.” His eyes travel down my lips and I begin to tense.

  “I’m going to walk away now.” I announce taking a step back, making his hand drop.

  “Fine,” He says as he follows me back to the car. “I’ll chase you for as long as you want me to, Gin.”

  Now that makes me smile so hard that my cheeks begin to hurt.

  I left a part out in my little speech to him. He’s not just too handsome and too attractive and too famous and too wanted by everyone else—it’s not just that.

  Derek Collins is also too good to resist…and the night is still not over yet.

  16. anything, everything

  “Hey, come here.”

  Derek reaches for my hand and pulls me towards him as we reach the car. He leans against it and I stand in front of him. Everything feels so dreamy with Derek. It feels like we’re in a movie. Anything Derek does must look like he’s in a movie.

  He’s so close to me and I allow my eyes to travel down his neck, to his broad shoulders and muscular chest. Yes. I can see it. He would make the perfect male stripper. He looks so good with clothes on, I can’t imagine how good he looks without them. Why am I even thinking about him naked? I kick those thoughts out of my head immediately.

  “You can touch me, Gin,” Derek says softly and his eyes look amused when I look up at him. He grabs my hand and places it on his strong chest.

  “Don’t flatter yourself.” I roll my eyes at him but I leave my hand there then I move it to his impressive muscular arm. “You work out a lot, don’t you?”

  “Every day,” He says proudly then shrugs. “Well, almost every day. Depends on where I am, really.”

  “You ate pizza today.” I remind him then I smile. “Did I make you break your diet?”

  “Hardly.” He grins. “I still eat whatever I want most of the time.”

  I nod, thoughtfully.

  “Tell me about you, Gin,” He says looking down at me.

  I smile. “What do you want to know?”

  “Anything, everything.” He smiles. “Tell me about your family.”

  “I have an older sister. Her name is Natalie.” I smile as I think about her. I miss her. She’s probably my best friend. I feel bad for not calling her more often. I decide to call her on Monday or when I get back to New York. I mostly keep up with her through the pictures she posts on Instagram. “She just had a baby.”

  “Oh? So, you’re an aunt.”

  I nod. “Yes. His name is Samuel.” My smile begins to fade.

  Derek frowns as he studies me. “What’s wrong?”

  “Nothing,” I shake my head. “It’s just sad because I haven’t met him. He was born in January and I haven’t been able to go to Newport. He doesn’t know what I look like and I’m his aunt.”

  “Why haven’t you been able to go?” He asks softly.

  “Work, school, money.” I shrug. “I’ll go once the semester is over. I’m sorry if I’m being dramatic. I don’t mean to.”

  “You’re not,” He says. “You are making me feel guilty, though.”

  “Guilty? Why?” I ask looking up at him.

  “Well, because I haven’t seen my family in a while and they live in New York.”

  I frown. “Why don’t you visit them?”

  He looks up at the sky, thoughtfully. “My family is…” He looks at me again. “Too much.” His lip quirks up in a half smile. “I think I know what you meant earlier when you told me that I’m too much.”

  “Too much?” I repeat.

  “Yes,” He says then he chuckles. “Everyone thinks we’re this great, successful family but we’re all pretty fucked up, really.”

  I smile and shake my head slowly. “I don’t know what you mean.”

  “I know,” He says. “I don’t really want to get into it right now.”

  “Okay,” I say.

  He looks at me and smiles. His hand goes up to my face and he strokes my jawline with his thumb like he did earlier. It’s almost like a warning. It makes my insides warm. “You are so exquisite,” He says looking at me. “You have such perfect features.” He continues, trailing his hand on my cheek. “I love your cheekbones.”

  I look away with an embarrassed smile. “Shut up,” I say because he’s making me blush.

  Derek Collins just called me exquisite and complimented my face. How is this real life?

  “I want to kiss you, Gin,” He says softly and I look at him in surprise. “But I have an event on Wednesday so I need to make sure that you’re not going to punch me.”

  I laugh, biting my lip.

  His hands are on either side of my face, his thumbs stroke my jawline softly. “Do you want me to kiss you?” He asks looking into my eyes.

  I purse my lips in anticipation. I look down at his full, delicious looking lips. “I think it’s pretty obvious.”

  He smiles at me. “I just can’t seem to get a proper yes from you, can I?”

  I shake my head with a stupid smile on my face.

  He raises my head and I watch as his eyes roam all over my face before they land on my lips. He leans in slowly and presses his lips against the left side of my mouth and kisses me right in the corner. He’s teasing me and I try to pull away in protest but his hand goes around my waist and he keeps me in place.

  “We only get one first kiss, Gin,” He whispers looking into my eyes. “Let me enjoy it, please?”

  I’m speechless and completely dazzled by him. Oh, I am so deep in. I can’t speak so I just nod once and he leans in and kisses my cheek. And then he kisses my other cheek. He places butterfly kisses along my jawline and I get the weird sense that we shouldn’t be doing this in public. We’re the only ones in t
he parking lot and the beach appears to be empty but this still feels too intimate. I just want him to kiss me and get it over with.

  And then he finally presses his lips against mine. I close my eyes and put my arms around his neck. Our lips move slowly as they get to know each other. He tightens his arm around my waist as our lips begin to move faster. And then I feel his tongue on my lower lip and I part my lips wider, giving him entrance. I feel him smile against my lips which makes me smile and then we’re laughing.