We break up but we know we’re going to get back together. Our break up is a break, a chance to find ourselves and get better for each other. Derek always begins to date someone else almost instantly. It actually took him a bit longer this time but I was waiting for it.
I was prepared to see him with my new replacement.
Jealousy still stung though. I hate to see him with other women. I hated to see him last night with her. I hated the way he touched her as they danced. The way he smiled at her. The way he kissed her. The way she looked at him. Other than the fact that she’s not in the public eye, she is not different from the others. She’s still my replacement. She’s still just someone Derek is using to make me jealous and she’ll be the reason we get back together.
It’s nothing personal. It’s just the way it is.
I don’t have anything against her, other than the fact that she’s sleeping with the man I love. Maybe I can even thank her when Derek and I get back together.
All of this goes through my head when Jeremy asks me how it felt so see Derek last night at the party.
It’s Sunday morning and we’re having breakfast at our favorite brunch restaurant. Jeremy is the only family member I trust enough to be friends with. We’re the outcasts of the family and that has brought us together.
I grab a strawberry from the fruit bowl and take a bite as I think about Derek. He looked so good last night. When does he not? Truth is, I miss him. That's why I jumped at the opportunity to see him. I owe it to the twins. I’ll have to buy them some Louis Vuitton purses as a thank you later today.
“It was good,” I say after chewing on the strawberries.
Jeremy smirks at me. “Are you guys back together or what?”
I smile. “Not yet.”
“Why are you guys like this?”
“Like what?” I ask even though I know exactly what he means.
He moves his head to the side as he speaks. “You break up, you guys make each other jealous, you get back together, you guys break up and do it all over again.”
I shrug. “It’s fun.”
“It’s exhausting just hearing about it.”
I roll my eyes at him then purse my lips as I look at him. “What did you think of her?”
“Think of who?” He asks as he looks down at his food.
I roll my eyes with a smile. “My replacement.”
Jeremy grins. “She’s hot.”
My smile fades. “You’re annoying.”
He laughs. “What? She is. She’s probably the hottest girl your idiot ex-boyfriend has dated.”
I ignore his comment because I know he’s just trying to annoy me. “Did you tell her what I told you to tell her?”
“That you and Derek will eventually get back together? Yes.” He looks at me. “Though the whole world knows so I’m pretty sure she already suspects it.”
“She doesn’t,” I say reaching for my drink. I look past him, at the city view. “She’s probably hoping it’s different with her.”
“It could be.”
I narrow my eyes at him. “Whose side are you on?”
“She’s different, Sadie,” He says with a shrug. “Maybe it’s what Derek needs?”
“What Derek needs is me.”
Jeremy raises an eyebrow at me. “Now you sound like those crazy, obsessed ex-girlfriends.”
“I’m not.” I look at him. “Derek misses me. He’s trying to get my attention. That’s why he’s dating her.”
“I don’t know. You heard about that couple that got married last week. They met through Ian’s app.”
I roll my eyes at him. “The stupid app is not a threat to me.”
“So what do you think about her being matched to your beloved that night in a bar full of other women?”
I shrug. “I don’t know, luck? She should buy a lottery ticket.”
Jeremy chuckles. “Derek is not that worthy,” He says and I narrow my eyes at him and he grins. “Remember when you hated him just three months ago when you guys broke up?” He asks.
“I didn’t hate him.” I look down. “I was just…annoyed with him.”
Annoyed. Surprised. Scared.
I panicked.
There is something that nobody knows except for me and Derek. It’s the real reason we broke up. It’s a powerful truth that I’m holding back, for now. I’m just waiting for the right moment. This truth will be what breaks that girl’s heart because it’s so obvious she’s already in love with Derek. She’ll be stupid not to fall for him.
The bad news for her is that he is mine and I am his and there is absolutely nothing or anyone that can come between us. It’ll be us together at the end of everything.
I look at Jeremy and smile. “Okay, here’s what I need you to do…”
27. remember me?
SAVANNAH
I look straight ahead at the road in front of me as I drive. It’s been over a week of driving this car and it still feels as dreamy as the first time I drove it on my own.
I didn’t ask Derek to let me borrow it, I wouldn’t, but he asked me to take it to get to work and be able to go places since I’ve been staying over at his place. I couldn’t turn it down. I’ve been dying to drive it. I never thought I would be driving a Tesla to get to work or go to the grocery store.
The days have been going by really fast since Ian’s party. I began to sleep in Derek’s room with him and it’s been amazing. We still haven’t had sex but we kiss a lot. I know it’s only a matter of time before we go all the way and I almost can’t wait. I want him. All of him. It’s embarrassing how much I want to have sex with him. I’m so glad he can’t hear my thoughts.
Today I have my last final of the semester which makes it an even better day.
No school means I’ll have more time to spend with Derek. He’s been having photoshoots and meetings lately, though, so I’m not sure just how much time we’ll be able to spend together. Still, I’ll have more time to focus on him without feeling guilty. We can kiss longer in the mornings.
This morning, I almost ran late. He kissed me goodbye as I was heading out the door and the kiss turned into a very long, very hot kiss. It was nearly impossible to pull away from him. If I didn’t have this final, I would’ve given in and missed class.
I’m so glad this semester is over. I feel confident in all the finals I’ve taken and I’m confident in this last one that I’m going to take. I’ve learned so much already; I feel so accomplished. Now that the semester is over, I’ll finally be able to visit my family in Newport. I’m going to ask for the days off from work today. I hope I can get at least five days off though a week would be great. Maybe I’ll ask for the whole week off if Jim is in a good mood.
I get to school and park in the same spot I’ve been parking on for the past few days. It’s been pretty cool to drive this awesome car but it’s also stressful. I know I’m responsible for it if something happens to it and I don’t have the money for that sort of debt.
“That’s what insurance is for, Gin,” Derek said to me the day he asked me to take the car for the first time.
He is obviously crazy in letting anyone borrow his expensive cars but I also know that he’s a millionaire. He can buy all the cars he wants.
Ever since the interview came out over a week ago, I’ve finally understood just how famous Derek is. We were trending on Twitter and I couldn’t help but peek at what people were saying. There were many people commenting how cute we are as a couple. Others called us a hoax, claiming we’re just faking to be the perfect couple to help Ian sell his app. I gained even more followers on Instagram, especially after Derek posted a picture of us on his profile and tagged me, making us Instagram official. Everyone forgot all about Sadie being at Ian’s party which I liked.
Our relationship seems more solid now that we’re out there and everyone knows we’re together. Everything has happened so fast, I haven’t even had time to worry about what happened at Ian’s party. I catch myself thinking about it so
metimes. It’s almost like I’m trying to warn myself subconsciously but I refuse to listen.
For the first time in a long time, I am happy. Genuinely happy. I mean it when I smile. Waking up every morning with Derek’s arm around me is a gift. I don’t want this dream to ever end.
“Hey, Savannah!”
I turn around and see Kim walking towards me.
“Hey,” I say with a smile when she catches up to me.
“Ready to conquer this last final?” She asks as we walk.
“So ready.”
Kim and I go to lunch after our final then we hang out before we both have to work that evening. Work is the only thing that feels normal these days so it doesn’t feel like a burden it did a few weeks ago. I enjoy doing what I do. I wouldn’t be going to culinary school if I didn’t. But I’m definitely excited to take a break. I submit my request for the week off and hope for the best.
After work, Kim and I walk to the bar. We agreed to have a drink to celebrate being done with the semester. I don’t want to drink because I’m driving but I have an ice water to accompany Kim.
“How have things been with you and Derek?” She asks after Adrian hands us our drinks.
“Good.” I smile.
“Just good?” She teases, wiggling her eyebrows.
I laugh. “Great. Fantastic. Amazing.”
“That's more like it.” She laughs.
I don’t know why I glance at the doorway as someone is walking in. I frown when I see the familiar face. It takes me a moment to remember where I know him from and then I do. Jeremy, Sadie’s cousin, is walking into the bar right now.
I look down at my drink. I don’t know why I’m trying to hide my face. Why would he want to talk to me anyway? I know I don’t want to talk to him. The last time we spoke left a bad taste in my mouth. I don’t want that. I don’t need that.
Yet, despite all this, I see him make his way towards me from the corner of my eye.
“Everything okay?”
I look up at Adrian who is studying me with his brown eyes. I nod with a small smile. “Yeah, just a bit tired.” Not necessarily a lie. Maybe I should’ve just gone home.
“Hey, remember me?”
I turn to my right and meet Jeremy’s eyes. As if I could forget everything he said to me the other night. It’s suddenly rushing back into my mind. It’s what they do. Ugh. I’ve been trying so hard to block that conversation from my mind. It looks like I’m about to have it again.
“Hi, yes,” I say to him. “Jeremy, right?”
He grins. “Right.” He looks up at Adrian. “Let me have a beer, man.”
“Coming right up.” Adrian responds.
I look at Kim and she gives me a who is he? look. I didn’t tell her about Jeremy when I told her about Sadie showing up at the party. Again, I was trying to pretend that conversation never happened.
“This is my friend, Kim,” I say to Jeremy. “Kim, this is Jeremy. He’s…” I trail off because I don’t know how to introduce him. He’s not my friend. He’s my boyfriend’s ex-girlfriend’s cousin. What a weird introduction. Why is he here anyway?
“A friend, I hope,” Jeremy says shaking Kim’s hand. I pull back so his arm won’t touch mine.
He seems to be one of those guys that are touchy and invade personal space without realizing it. He’s sitting close enough for our shoulders to touch and I shift uncomfortably and glance at my phone, checking the time. How long ago did we get here? Right, like five minutes ago.
“I’ve never seen you here,” I say casually. It can’t be a coincidence that he just walked into this bar out of all the other bars down the street. I have a bad feeling about him. My gut is telling me not to trust him.
“It’s my first time here,” He says then nods at Adrian when he hands him the beer. “You come here a lot, don’t you?” He asks turning to look at me. “I mean, this is where you and Derek met?”
I nod slowly as I look down at my drink. “Yes, this is where we met.”
Of course he would know that. Everybody knows. This bar has become very popular thanks to that. It’s the reason I haven’t come here in a couple days. People leave me alone most of the time. I just feel them staring and whispering whenever they figure out that I’m Derek’s girlfriend. It’s the paparazzi that actually follow me if they spot me. It’s still very crazy to me.
“You guys are pretty serious, aren’t you?”
I turn to look at him. “Did Sadie send you over to investigate?”
He chuckles at my question then takes a sip from his beer. “She didn’t, no. Sorry if I’m coming off that way. I’m genuinely curious, just like everyone else.” He shrugs.
The thing about Jeremy is that he speaks with a genuine look in his eyes. For a moment, I think that maybe I’m overreacting. Maybe I’m just overthinking everything and he’s being honest. I can’t tell if he’s faking it or not and it’s bothering the hell out of me. I don’t know him. He’s basically a stranger, yet he’s talking to me like we’ve known each other for a while. Derek has never mentioned him, so I don’t know what sort of relationship they had when he was with Sadie. What would he think about Jeremy showing up at the bar and coming straight to me? Is it as suspicious as I’m making it seem or am I overreacting?
I don’t know. I don’t know what to think.
I wish I could have a sidebar with Kim, who is chatting with Adrian while I try to avoid answering Jeremy’s questions.
“What do you want, Jeremy?” I finally ask looking at him. I realize that I don’t have to be nice to him. We’re not friends. I owe him nothing.
He half smiles. “You’re not a shy girl.”
“No, I’m not.” I agree.
“I like that,” He says looking into my eyes. “I don’t want anything but a friendship. I thought we got along pretty well.”
“So you decided to come to the bar where you knew you would find me?” I prompt because that’s pretty creepy. A guy doesn’t do that, unless…
“Okay,” He says with a smile. “You caught me.” His eyes roam all over my face. “I liked you a little too much, Savannah.”
I raise my eyebrows then laugh. “Are you messing with me?”
“Of course not.”
“You know I’m seeing Derek.”
He shrugs. “I thought I would give it my shot, in case he’s being an asshole to you.”
“I can handle him.”
He grins. “I can see that. Maybe that's why I liked you so much.”
I lean back because I didn’t realize how close he had gotten to me. Then I clear my throat and begin to stand up. “I think it’s time to go,” I say turning to Kim who nods in agreement.
“I’m ready to go,” She says in agreement.
I’m in such a hurry to stand up and walk away, that somehow my foot gets stuck on the stupid stool and I stumble back and brace myself to hit the floor.
I never hit the floor because Jeremy puts his arm around me and pulls me back up.
“Whoa,” I say then laugh sheepishly because I’m sure everyone else just saw that. I drop my hands and take a step back. I’m way too close to him. “Thanks.” I tell him because he might’ve saved me from breaking a bone or cracking my skull. I don’t necessarily like him but I’m not ungrateful.
“Anytime,” He says with a smile. “See you around.”
“Sure,” I say already turning around and following Kim out the door.
“What was that about?” She asks once we’re outside.
I shake my head, just as perplexed. “I have no idea.”
That is the understatement of the evening.
28. maybe
Back in Newport, I would watch over my parent’s inn a lot especially when they went on vacation. My sister used to live in Portland before she got married so, really, I was the only choice for them. I used to hate it when I was a teenager and they would make me work during the weekends. I would help my mom clean the rooms and do the laundry and cook. The older I got, the more
I enjoyed working at the inn.
My favorite thing to do, of course, is cooking for the guests. We’re not a five-star hotel so the meals at the inn are homey meals like buttermilk pancakes, eggs with beans, homemade tortillas made by my mom, among other dishes we’ve mastered over the years.
DEREK'S MATCH Page 19