Professor X

by Kiki Leach

  Prez shook his head, then pointed at a quietly fuming Xavier. "You let me know first thing in the AM what she says." Xavier nodded in agreement and swallowed hard to keep from spewing a single word of fire toward his VP. "Alright."

  After slamming the gavel and dismissing church for the night, Prez got up from the table and returned to the front of the club, preparing to make a call for clubhouse company. The other brothers followed in unison with the exception of X, who remained seated and Scooter, who remained at his side.

  As the door closed behind them, Scooter glanced at his brother and lifted his brows in question. "You gonna see her tonight?"

  "Nah, gonna try callin' her with this shit instead. Don't wanna see the look on her face when I tell her what the club is askin' from her now."

  "If she's still willin' to help us outta this shit, brother--"

  "Don't matter." He stood up from the table and moved toward the door. "She thinks the only reason we never hooked up after I got patched in was 'cause of the pussy floatin' in and outta here -- pussy I coulda had on my cock any goddamn time of the day or night I wanted... I let her believe that shit even up to the second I was inside her 'cause it was easier, and then I started believin' the shit for myself to spare what I knew could come after she was gone." He stopped and looked over his shoulder as Scooter stared into his face. "I never wanted her fallin' into this kinda shit, havin' that old lady status without bein' official."

  "You can't control whatever the fuck she happened to want for herself, brother. This life out here has always been it. You've always been at the top of her goddamn list..." He got up from his chair and leaned against the table; he folded his arms and chortled. "Gabi said she used to tell her about dreamin' what it'd be like to see your ass again; to start the fuck over with her comin' in fresh -- never havin' seen another cock inside this club but your own... She still wants that shit from you, brother, and I don't think anything is gonna stop her from tryna get and keep it for herself this time around."

  "Yeah, well, Rocka might," he replied. "Asshole doesn't just want back inside of her again, he wants me watchin' it happen."

  "Jesus Christ..." His eyes lowered as the bridge of his nose wrinkled with disgust. "Still a sick fuck."

  "It's beyond that shit with him now that she's back; motherfucker is all 'bout the pain and what he can get from it between the two of us... I ain't watchin' some shit like that go down, but I can't be with her in knowin' that it could either."

  "You'd toss away somethin' good you could have with her over somethin' she can't control with this motherfucker?"

  "Ain't about that shit. Regardless of what the fuck she's always wanted from my ass, she cared about that prick at some point too. What if bein' with him again triggers some kinda shit she didn't realize--?"

  "And she what?" he interjected. "Wants him back? You're bein' serious?" Xavier nodded as a pensive look crossed his face. "Brother, I don't see that shit happenin' -- not even goddamn close with that shriveled ol' prick. You own every part of this bitch right down to her goddamn heart and soul, always fuckin' have since we were kids runnin' around here like dicks. You start seein' and realizin' this shit, blockin' out whatever kinda fear keeps holdin' you back from understandin' the truth, we won't be havin' a conversation like this again. Feel me on this, and go talk to your girl."

  He dropped a hand on top of his shoulder and bobbed his head before stepping out of the room.

  Xavier clutched the knob as the door remained open, reflecting on the words of his best friend and questioning the weight of his own goddamn fear. Then he closed his eyes and conjured Mariah's face, remembering the feelings that passed between them as he held her all night in his arms, sometimes watching her sleep and move against him with a comfort he hadn't felt from a woman since she left. His heart began to pound as his cock began to stiffen.

  "Yo, brother!" Cheddar called, forcing his eyes to pop open. "You takin' a few of these with us before headin' out?"

  Xavier eyed his brothers as they sat around shots of tequila plastered across the bar and pool tables before moving around the door and closing it behind himself. "Nah, I need to start headin' out," he said. "Make that phone call to Mariah when she gets outta class and off campus."

  "Alright," hollered Prez. "Remember to let me know what's up for the mornin'."

  "Yeah, brother, will do."

  After peacing out, Xavier rushed outside and hopped on top of his bike, keeping the intensity of Mariah's image in his mind as he zoomed from the lot and headed straight home.

  Chapter Twelve

  Xavier

  Six beers, a full bottle of tequila and four hours later, that motherfucker remained on edge, his heart dangling from the tip of a goddamn cliff until his doorbell rang.

  "Shit." As Xavier sat up on his couch and groaned in anticipation of who it could be, he wiped the sleep from his eyes and looked toward the front door. "Yeah?" When silence abounded from the other side, he reached for his cut on the table in front of him and latched onto his holster, sliding his finger across the trigger of his .45. "Who the fuck's out there?" he hollered, his face turning puce as he spat from the corners of his mouth. "You gonna speak up or do I need to blow a hole through that goddamn skull first and ask again later?"

  "It's me, X," a soft voice finally responded. "I didn't hear you the first time out here, I'm sorry."

  "Mariah?" The muscles in his face relaxed as he wagged his head and groaned. "Shit, darlin' -- I didn't know."

  "It's okay. Are you going to let me inside?"

  "Yeah, doll, just a second."

  He shoved his .45 back into the holster and jumped to his feet, then draped his cut along the back of another couch and rushed to the door, pulling back and swallowing hard enough to rattle the wisp of air floating between them as Mariah bent her head to the side and smiled.

  "Hi," she told him.

  "Hey, darlin'." He nodded and straightened himself while tugging at his shirt. "It's late, yeah?"

  "Not late enough for me; shouldn't be for you either when it's barely midnight." She smiled again and subtly chewed her bottom lip to keep from saying more of what she knew she shouldn't. "Actually, I don't think that I was expecting for you to be here."

  "Yeah?"

  "No. Part of me thought it was possible for you to still be at the club with my calls going ignored and now seeing that your bike isn't parked outside."

  "Yeah, I uh..." He blinked a few times and took in a breath while his eyes lingered on the beauty of her frame. "I put it in the garage for the night... What're you doin' out here 'round this time as it is? You get lost on the way home from school?"

  "Not exactly." Her grin widened as her head dipped; she wagged it left to right and rolled her eyes until they reached the back of her skull. "You texted me almost six hours ago to say that you would call and tell me something about the club once I was finished with my last class; you never did and I panicked."

  "Shit." He swiped his forehead and stepped aside, allowing her to shuffle past him and bounce into the living room. "Sorry, darlin', my ass fell the fuck asleep."

  "I can see that." Her eyes darted to the coffee table covered from corner to corner in empty beer bottles and partially smoked joints. She soured and brushed her hand across her nose to quell the smell before turning back to him as he closed the door. "Did you have issues at church?" she questioned. "With letting the brothers know what I told you about Rocka and the Kings?"

  He nodded before brushing past her and stepping into the kitchen. "They ain't surprised this asshole might be linked up with the Kings against us, but they also know they need to keep him around 'til we get this shit settled." He moved to the fridge and reached for another beer, this time in a can. After popping the tab, he drank until there was nothing left and slapped his hand across his chest, coughing as the bubbles consumed his throat.

  Mariah leaned against the frame, watching him with a concern that nearly ate her to the bone as he tossed the can into the trash a
nd grunted. "Why are you drinking so much tonight, X?"

  "Thirsty as shit, darlin'. Nothin' else seems to be hittin' the right spot."

  "What else did the club tell you tonight about Rocka?" she asked. "What else did they say needed to be done?" He latched onto the edge of his counter, hard enough to damn near snap it between his fingers, and looked to the floor; his teeth clinched as he gulped, almost refusing to respond. "X."

  "They wanna know if you'd be willin' to talk to his ass again," he replied. "They want the Kings back down here to scope 'em out -- knowin' the only way to get that shit to happen without lookin' like we know what the fuck is up is through pussy... They want you goin' to Rocka and askin' if we could have somethin' at ACE's with his girls, the Kings, other charters and whatever abandoned pussy we can get out there for a night. Get 'em high, drunk, fuckin' out in the open like usual... we can get inside some shit if their minds are preoccupied with somethin' else."

  "Okay. But..." She stood away from the frame and placed her hands in front of herself; she stepped to his kitchen table, leaning against the back of a chair, and shrugged. "Why the hell is this something the club thinks I need to ask him?"

  "He told you this shit first-hand, darlin'."

  "He wanted the club to know," she retorted.

  "Don't matter. Him wantin' you back in his bed means he's willin' to talk more openly 'bout shit that'd no doubt keep his ass mum with the rest of us."

  "So I should go back to him and risk being felt up for the second time in the hope that he tells me more of what Boone and Tractor need to know about the Kings? Maybe he'll only cop a few more feels instead of asking me to jump back on his dick this time?"

  "What the fuck?" His face twisted with ire as he rounded the table and stood directly in front of Mariah, his giant stature practically towering her small frame. "What the fuck are you sayin' 'bout bein' felt up -- What the fuck did that asshole do to you down there, Mariah?"

  "It doesn't matter."

  "The fuck it don't, darlin'."

  "I don't want you going down there and attacking him for it. We still don't need the kind of hell that would bury us if you did."

  "Fuck that shit, darlin' -- I don't care 'bout that shit. Fuckin' him up over somethin' he mighta done to you would be worth it."

  "No, it wouldn't."

  She spun away from the table before he could respond and sauntered back into the living room, only stopping as Xavier stepped behind her and rested his hand at the small of her back, his fingers brushing across the skin exposed beneath her tank.

  "Darlin'." She shivered against him as every sense in her body faded with every breath released between them. Her heart fluttered and swelled with affection. "I didn't want this shit," he muttered. "But the club wanted me to ask--"

  "Because they know I would do anything to help you from going under." She walked away from him as the pain of that truth hung in the air like a wistful cloud bound to rain upon them at any second and headed for the couch, taking a seat and sinking into the cushions. She placed her hands inside her lap and looked into the darkness of his wide screen television before lowering her head to a pillow and parting her lips to exhale. "You know that I've loved the club for as long as I can remember," she said in a quiet voice, almost too damn low for even herself to hear. Xavier watched her body shift against the fabric of his couch, remembering the last time he allowed anyone to take up his space in the same way, and shook his head in realizing he never truly had before now, not since her. "I loved that ridiculous smell of leather and the fumes flying in the air when you'd take off from the lot on your bikes," she continued. "I loved being part of something and having an extended family... even if I was being passed around from time to time like an over-sucked lollipop before I knew better." She removed her shoes and lifted her bare feet to the edge of his coffee table. Xavier grinned at her becoming comfortable in his house all over again before taking a seat beside her and lifting his own feet from the floor. She peeked at him from the corner of her eye and reached for his hand, placing it inside her own before bringing them to her heart. "Not much has changed since I left here," she said. "Not ACE'S, your house or the punched holes in the walls that I can still see from here... not the town itself. Everything is... something of the same, except you personally."

  "Yeah?" He snickered. "Pretty sure I ain't changed for shit either, darlin'."

  "You're much more open than you were before I left, at least with me." She lowered their hands to her lap and interlaced their fingers, folding them over the back of his hand. "And you're much more affectionate."

  He folded his fingers over the back of her hand and pressed their palms together, forcing an electric shock to pass between them. She gulped to keep from reacting to him with her mouth firmly pressed against his own. "Couldn't be that way with anybody else if I tried," he said.

  "And have you tried, X?" She leaned into him, close enough to taste the beer on his breath as her heart rate increased, and rolled her tongue between her lips in anticipation of his answer. "Have you tried with anyone else since me, ever?"

  "Nah." His voice lowered as he closed his eyes for a few seconds and wagged his head. "You already know from what I told you before that I ain't."

  "I know." She blushed as a knowing smile crossed her lips. "Maybe I wanted to hear it again, knowing that it makes me special to you or something like it?"

  "Yeah, darlin', it does. Makes you real goddamn special to a motherfucker like me. Always has and will."

  "You promise?"

  "Yeah, darlin', always." He lifted his other hand to her face, brushing her cheek with the corner of his thumb; her mouth fell open as her eyelids fluttered; the heat from his touch nearly forced her to collapse against him. "You wanna stay out here with me tonight?" he questioned. She bobbed her head. "You got class in the mornin'?"

  "In the afternoon. I'll call Rocka after and ask him about the girls and Kings at ACE'S."

  "I don't want you meetin' with him on his turf again. Just like I told you before and what you said tonight confirms that shit, the motherfucker can't be trusted."

  "He can't, which is why I know that he won't come to the club," she said. "And he won't come here. Weasels are only good for so long outside of the hole they managed to fall into."

  "Goddamn." His hand fell from her face as he sat back and stared into her eyes with a concern masked by fear. "He's gonna try some more shit after wantin' answers for himself 'bout you dancin' for him again."

  "I know... But if I can actually buck up and tell him what we talked about before, say that my having sex with him isn't a guarantee for employment... he could listen? Especially if my point for seeing him again is about the club needing his help with the Kings; he'll think he still has a chance if I keep coming around for the club and think we're sharing a personal secret if we talk about the Devils or Kings."

  "What are you gonna do if that shit ain't enough for him?" he asked, his fingers tightening around her hand as they remained inside her lap. "What if nothin' gets done on his part 'cause he's hangin' onto you hoppin' back onto his cock 'fore it does?"

  "It's a bridge I'll have to cross when I get to it, X. But... I'm not willing to return to the person I was before I left. She died the minute that you killed her."

  "Darlin'--"

  "You know what I mean in that sense... I never want to go back to who I was before we were together -- not even for a job that I need or as a favor for your club." A quick sigh of relief escaped him as he dropped his feet back down to the floor. She sat up and frowned. "You thought I would go there with him again if I had more time to think about it?"

  "Don't know," he answered. "But I couldn't stop you from it if that was what you thought needed to be done for yourself or the club. I ain't in the business of controllin' you or your body."

  "You don't have to be. Just know that anything I hope to do with it moving forward would be with no one else but you."

  He chuckled and brought the back of her hand to hi
s mouth, keeping a solid grip around her fingers as he pressed his lips against her skin and mumbled. "You promisin' me that shit?"

  "Yes... With every single inch of my heart, Xavier, I promise." They stared at each other for what felt like an eternity until he finally pulled her on top of him and slipped an arm around her waist. She moaned against him and snaked her arm around his neck while adjusting herself; she stared into his eyes with more love than her heart could contain and smiled. "This is nice." Her gaze slipped to his mouth as she slid her tongue between her lips and exhaled.

  "Yeah, darlin', always is. Only goddamn thing that can relax my brain after leavin' the club is bein' with you."

  "I'm the cure you'll need until the end of time," she joked.

  "Yeah... Goddamn jokin' aside, you just might be."

  She brought her eyes back to his face and grinned wide enough to set her cheeks on fire. "I still love you like crazy... I still love you in a way that would make me feel crazy if I ever stopped."

  He nodded. "Without a goddamn doubt, darlin', I'm still feelin' more of the same."

  "What do we do if none of this ends well for any of us, Xavier? Where the hell do we go from here?"

  "Don't know... But I might need you by my side either way once it's over."

  "I'll need you by mine." She reached for his hand again and kissed the center of his palm. He worked his hips against her and groaned. "We'll always have each other regardless of what happens from here on?"

  "Always, darlin'. No other motherfucker could stop the shit between us if they tried."

  Chapter Thirteen

  Mariah

  A few days later, I returned to ACE'S to meet with Rockafeller about the party.

  After tossing back a slew of shots at the bar with the hope of gearing myself up to see him again, I climbed the stairs to his office and made my way inside, stumbling to the couch as he closed and locked the door behind me.

  "Oh boy."