Fiends and Familiars

by Dunbar, Debra

  “Hounds.” I stood and faced the lazy canines. “You all will sleep in my garage tonight. I release you. You are free to stay, sleep, and eat what I provide, or you may return to your infernal home and master. It’s your choice, but you cannot stay inside my house tonight.”

  They stood and stretched, grumbling a bit at being denied a cozy night in my living room. I grabbed the bag of dog food I’d bought earlier, and they perked up, following me into the garage. I poured food into several bowls and dishes, then added a few blankets and pillows and several buckets of fresh water. Leaving the garage door open enough for them to go as they pleased, I wished them good night, then went back inside, sealing the wards around the garage. I trusted the hounds since I’d bound them to me, but I wanted to give them the freedom to leave if they chose, but not open my house up to whatever monsters might want to enter—including Ty.

  “You,” I pointed at Rhoid. “I need to talk to you.”

  The other three squirrels took off and hid under the couch. Rhoid looked as if he were about to do the same.

  “I protected you. I stood here in my living room and faced down a demon and a pack of hellhounds to keep you from being dragged off to hell. The very least you owe me is an explanation.”

  Rhoid squeaked and patted a little paw on his chest, an innocent-squirrel look on his face.

  “Talk, or I’ll kick you outside of my house and outside of the wards,” I told him. “My magic is wearing off the hellhounds. They’ll hunt you down and have you within minutes without my protection.”

  Rhoid sighed then hopped along the edge of the counter, leaping ten feet onto the nearest chair where he sat with his arms crossed in front of him.

  “Are you really Faust? The Faust?” I waited for his nod. “Tell me how you ended up in hell, how you managed to escape, and everything since then.”

  I made a bargain with Satan when I was alive, he told me. Through smarts, trickery, and magic I managed to live for nearly three hundred years, but Satan finally outwitted me and I died, my soul forfeit to hell for all eternity.

  I had no idea what his original bargain had been, but he’d gone into it with open eyes and managed to evade paying the price for far longer than had been the original intent of the deal. As much as the idea of hell’s punishments gave me the creeps, the guy had willingly entered into this deal.

  After suffering for a few decades, I bribed and tricked a few demons, then stole Charon’s boat and managed to escape. But one of the demons I’d tricked was smarter than I thought and my resurrection spell came with a curse.

  You’re a squirrel. That’s your curse.

  He nodded. Do you know how sick I am of eating nuts and cracked corn? Of having sex with squirrels? I can’t even perform magic like this. He held up his tiny paws. Ever since I escaped hell I’ve been like this, trying somehow to break the curse.

  “Well, I can’t help you break the curse. That’s not the sort of magic I can do,” I told him. What I didn’t tell him was that one of my sisters might be able to help him. Sylvie was a luck witch, and also had the opposite skill. If she couldn’t break a curse, then I was pretty sure Cassie could. But I wasn’t offering that up at this point. I might never offer that up. Being a squirrel was a better fate than being tortured in hell, and I couldn’t justify Rhoid avoiding all that he’d agreed to when he’d sold his soul to Satan. Plus he was a bit of a jerk. There was a reason I’d named him Hemorrhoid, after all.

  I didn’t come with you because I thought you could break the curse, although that would have been an added benefit, Rhoid said. I came with you because I knew you could protect me against Typhon and his hounds. I saw the effect you had on my squirrel friends, and knew you had the power to wrest control of the hellhounds away from their demon master. And I saw what a soft, weak, emotional response you had toward animals. I knew you’d protect me.

  I was starting to regret that I had protected him. Rhoid had used me just as Typhon had used me. Both of them deserved to be tossed out of my house and left to their own fates. But if I’d escaped hell as a squirrel with a pack of hellhounds and demons after me, maybe I’d use a capable witch for my protection as well. I couldn’t completely blame Rhoid, even though he was a total asshole.

  And I couldn’t completely blame Ty either. Faust had made a deal then welched on it. Ty was just doing his job in trying to retrieve him. And if I’d had a job to do and encountered a warded house with my quarry locked inside, I might try to sneak in via a dream as well.

  It wasn’t Ty’s fault the dream had turned erotic. That…that was probably on both of us. There was an attraction there, and I knew it wasn’t just on my side. Yeth had said Ty had thought himself enchanted. Maybe he’d doubted our attraction to each other just as I’d doubted his intentions.

  Yes, he wanted Faust back, but now that I thought about it, he truly hadn’t tried to attack me with his hellhounds. Plus if he’d wanted inside my house to get the squirrel, he wouldn’t have had to endure a putt-putt date with me when he could have broken through the wards and forced his way in.

  And he’d left when I told him to, although I knew if he really wanted he could have overpowered me, even with his hellhounds as happy puppies. My magic worked on them, but not on him, and he was far stronger than I was. I had no real defense against demon magic. But he’d walked away from Faust, a soul he’d been hunting down for centuries, because I’d told him to.

  Maybe there was some sort of compromise we could reach where Faust paid per the terms of his contract, but not necessarily the traditional hellish punishments. I needed to think on it before I reached out to contact Ty, though. And I definitely needed to get my emotions and heart under control before I saw him again.

  You’re not going to turn me over to him, are you? Rhoid asked, twisting his paws nervously together.

  “I don’t know. You made a deal, and it’s not my place to protect you when you refuse to hold up your end of the bargain.” Ugh. This was going to get ugly if I couldn’t come up with some compromise. If Ty went to Lucien and complained that I was protecting Faust, things would get very prickly in my family. I wasn’t even sure Cassie would stick up for me on this one. Rhoid had sold his soul after all.

  Unless there was a weird loophole in the contract. I wasn’t a lawyer, but Cassie was. Maybe she could figure something out. It would be better than me trying to come up with a deal. The only problem with that was that I’d need to tell Cassie everything, and I wasn’t sure I was ready to do that.

  But there was one of my sisters I’d definitely tell. Tomorrow. After a good night’s sleep, that is.

  “Go hide under the couch with your buddies,” I told Rhoid. “I promise I won’t do anything tonight.”

  Chapter 13

  Adrienne

  “You don’t have a lot of choices here, Addy,” Babylon wiped the bar down, then started washing glasses while I munched on a sandwich. “Turn the squirrel over, go to Cassie and Lucien and see if they can modify the contract somehow, or spend the rest of your life with this Faust barricaded inside your house.”

  I really didn’t like the last idea, and it wouldn’t work anyway. “He won’t stay behind. He insists on coming everywhere with me now. I’m literally going on calls with a vulture and four squirrels crammed into the cab of my truck.”

  Lonnie winced. “Honestly I’d just turn the damned thing over to the demon and wash my hands of the whole thing.”

  I groaned. “If he was in human form I’d totally do it, but he’s this cute, adorable, fuzzy squirrel. With little tiny paws, and a little twitchy nose, and big dark eyes.”

  “Yeah, they’re just as cute when they’re skeletons.” Babylon sighed. “I get it. I really do.”

  “When I walked in and saw Ty holding that fuzzy little guy up in the air like he was strangling him, I just lost it,” I told her.

  Lonnie nodded. “It would have been a different case if Ty were holding up a wizened old wizard who’d sold his soul centuries ago.”


  “I’m not sure I could have just excused Ty for choking an old man either.” I picked at my French fries. “I’m going to have to go to Cassie. Which sucks. It’s going to put her right in the middle between me and Lucien. I hate to do that.”

  “Eventually his job and ours was going to conflict,” Lonnie pointed out. “Cassie will work it out. She always does. And the best part is that takes everything right out of your hands. No longer your responsibility.”

  Except Rhoid still would kind of be my responsibility. And I still didn’t know what to do about Ty. Was there any way to make up with him after all that happened last night? Did I even want to make up with him?

  “You’re still coming to the party tonight, aren’t you?” Lonnie asked.

  I wrinkled my nose. “I probably shouldn’t. I’ve got so much to do, and Rhoid won’t stay home. It’s probably not safe for him to be running around a corn maze and bonfire with half of hell after him.”

  Although I hadn’t seen any of the hellhounds since last night. Neither had I seen Ty or any demons. Did Ty call a temporary truce? Were they waiting for an opportunity to jump on the squirrel and haul him back to hell?

  “That’s not your problem. If asshole Faust wants to leave your nice, safe, warded house, then that’s on him.” Babylon dried her hands and leaned over the bar. “Addy, you are coming to this party. You need to live your life. At no time did you promise to protect this squirrel who made the decision to run and hide behind your skirts. He’s the one who got himself in trouble. You’ve helped him far beyond what any witch would be expected to do.”

  “I don’t know. I’d feel terrible if I was partying it up and demons trashed my house and took Rhoid to hell. Or if he got snatched out of my truck or the field while I was eating barbeque and drinking beer.”

  “What’s the worst thing that could happen? Well, besides your house being trashed, that is. Faust already died once. So he dies again and spends a few days getting smacked around in hell until you pull enough strings to get him out on bail or get his sentence lessened. Thousands of people sell their souls to Satan, and they don’t get the luxury of a few hundred extra years of life, then a few hundred more running around as a squirrel. Stop taking on the world’s burdens, Addy. And especially stop taking on some asshole wizard’s burdens.”

  She was right. “Okay. You win. I’m going to the party tonight. But first I’m dropping all these animals off at my house and forcing them to stay there while I go talk to Cassie.”

  And I did just that, although one animal I couldn’t force to stay in my house. Drake came with me to the law firm where Cassie worked, waddling after me through the hallways and up the elevator to my sister’s office. I’d called ahead of time to make sure Cassie put me in her schedule, and to let her know that I needed Lucien to be there as well.

  My sister stood and came around the desk to give me a hug. Lucien stood beside her desk, a grim expression on his face. To his left stood another demon—one that I’d gotten to know carnally just last night.

  Ty was sexy as hell in a black business suit, his dark hair brushed back from his forehead. Unlike Lucien, he didn’t appear upset or angry. His expression was carefully blank, but as my eyes met his, I saw a brief flash of worry crease his forehead.

  “Why are you sheltering this criminal?” Lucien snarled. “Nothing concerning Faust is your business.”

  “It became my business when a squirrel took shelter in my house,” I snapped back. “I didn’t know the details of his contract with your father, or even that he was a human. I let some squirrels live in my house, then suddenly last night a demon and a pack of hellhounds are trying to kill an animal I had under my protection in my own house.”

  “And now you know differently, so hand him over.”

  I folded my arms across my chest. “Nope. Not happening.”

  “Let’s go over the contract Faust and your father’s representative signed.” Cassie moved back behind her desk and picked up a stack of papers. “Everybody sit while I read this.”

  “It’s airtight,” Lucien insisted. “His soul is ours. Our best contract lawyers in hell have looked at it.”

  “Well, I haven’t and since Faust is here and not in hell, he’s under our jurisdiction.”

  “He’s not in Accident,” Lucien argued. “You don’t have any more standing outside of Accident than I do.”

  “No, but as the soul in question has claimed sanctuary in my sister’s house, I do have jurisdiction. Our homes and places of business outside of Accident are still considered ours, just like embassies.”

  Lucien began to pace. I’d never seen him face off against my sister like this. He’d always seemed absolutely whipped, but maybe in private he actually stood up to her occasionally.

  Nah.

  Cassie flipped through the first two pages, then rubbed her forehead. “I don’t know, Addy, this looks pretty solid. Can’t you just give the guy back? He got way more than he’d bargained for in this contract from what I can see. It’s time for him to pay the piper.”

  “Keep reading,” I insisted. There had to be something I could do. There was no way I could look that squirrel in the eyes and send him off to hell for eternal torture.

  “Addy, please,” Ty pleaded. “His soul was legally bartered to us, and he’s been evading his end of the bargain for far too long. There is no reason for you to give him sanctuary.”

  “Don’t call me Addy, you asshole. Rather than come knock on my door when you realized I had Faust, you invade my dreams and have sex with me, then stalk me, ask me out on a date, and have sex with me again. Then once you’re in my house and we’re naked, you grab my squirrel and choke him.”

  “Wait…what?” Cassie pushed aside the stack of papers and stood. Fire crackled along her fingers as she glared at Ty.

  “Dude, seriously?” Lucien shook his head at Ty, then eyed Cassie nervously. “You actually thought screwing a witch was a good way to grab a soul she was safeguarding?”

  “She enchanted me, seduced me,” Ty complained. “All I was trying to do was find a way to get inside her wards.”

  “More like find a way inside something else,” I snapped.

  “Oh, like I could help it. I can’t resist you. The moment I’m with you I completely forget about my job, my hounds, the soul I’ve been trying to hunt down for centuries. If that damned squirrel hadn’t come into the living room and broken your spell, I would have spent the night with you in absolute bliss.”

  Somehow that was equally flattering and maddening. “There is no spell, you moron. I haven’t enchanted you. It’s you who seduced me, who took advantage of me to get Faust.”

  “You slept with my sister?” Cassie’s voice rose into a shriek. “Three times?”

  Ty squirmed. “Twice was in her dreams, so that doesn’t really count.”

  “Like hell it doesn’t buster.” I walked over and poked my finger into his chest.

  “I don’t like the idea of your demons screwing around with my family,” Cassie snarled at Lucien.

  “Well, it’s a little late for that since four of your seven sisters are shacked up with various denizens of hell, not including you,” Lucien snarled back.

  “There’s a difference between honest attraction and someone not being truthful about who he is and why he’s seducing my sister in her dreams.” Cassie jammed her hands on her hips.

  I did the same. “Yeah. I didn’t know you were the demon from my dreams when I met you at Pistol Pete’s. I didn’t suspect it until you sprouted horns as you were trying to strangle my squirrel. I didn’t even realize you were a demon—I thought maybe you were fae.”

  “Fae!” Ty nearly spat as he said the word. “How could you ever think I was fae? How?”

  Lucien stepped between us. “None of this matters. What does matter is that there is a soul we need to collect—a soul that legally belongs to us. Right, Cassie?”

  My sister grumbled something about how someone was definitely not getting any sex ton
ight, then sat back down at her desk to finish reading the contract. I tried to glare at Ty through Lucien, and I was pretty sure he was doing the same back to me. After fifteen very long minutes, Cassie pushed the stack of papers aside and sighed.

  “Faust’s soul belongs to Satan as soon as he dies. He milked that for as long as possible, living a few centuries past what his normal lifespan should have been. But the moment he died, his soul became forfeit.”

  “See? I told you so.”

  That was the absolute wrong thing for Lucien to say. Cassie gave him a glance that should have made him spontaneously combust, then looked at Ty who wisely took a step backward.

  “Yes, you did tell me so, but there is one small fact you’re overlooking. Darling.”

  I shivered when Cassie called Lucien “darling.” I noticed he did as well.

  “Faust is not dead,” she continued. “Therefore his soul does not currently belong to Satan.”

  “He died!” Ty shouted. “He died and we collected. His current state of aliveness doesn’t matter because his soul was forfeit at his death.”

  “Unfortunately the contract was poorly worded.” Cassie made a tic-tic noise and shook her head. “You might want to take that up with this particular crossroads demon, or someone in your legal department that puts together the boilerplate contracts. The wording does not specify his soul transfers to you upon dying, to continue in your possession after that act regardless of his current state. No, it says the soul belongs to Satan when the living being is dead. Mr. Faust was dead, and during that time his soul was legally yours. Now he is not dead, and his soul no longer belongs to you. According to this contract, his soul is Satan’s only when he is dead.”

  “Oh for fuck’s sake!” Lucien threw his hands up in the air, then eyed a few items on Cassie’s desk as if he were considering throwing them. Thankfully he thought better of the impulse, otherwise I had no doubt he would have been spending several nights sleeping on the front lawn.