by Royston Wood
*
Tumble was cross when she was dragged into the sea.
She was angry when several waves were allowed to break over her, giving her a real soaking.
And she was outraged to be shoved into the boot of the Noisy Metal Box That Transports, rather than her normal, luxurious position on the rear seat.
She had no idea why all these things were happening to her but suspected that Ruff had done something very naughty indeed.
The smell in the boot of the Noisy Metal Box That Transports was awful. That’s what happens when you put a Corgi that has been dunked up to its neck in slurry and only very poorly rinsed in the sea into a small space. Ruff didn’t mind though; he quite liked it. But it’s not as comfy as the back seat! It’s a bit cramped. Ruff wriggled around a bit, trying to find a more comfortable spot in amongst the various piles of junk, wellie boots, jackets, hats and gloves that lived in the boot.
“Well done, Princess!” he muttered.
“What is that supposed to mean!” snapped Tumble.
“Well done for getting us shoved into the boot instead of the nice soft back seat. That’s what it’s supposed to mean!” growled Ruff.
“I hope you don’t think us being put in the boot is anything to do with me! It must be something you’ve done.”
“It’s your smell,” grumbled Ruff.
“My smell? My smell!” snarled Tumble. “I smell gorgeous!”
“Yes, you do,” agreed Ruff. “But I don’t think the Pack Leader and the Lead Female think so.”
“Why not!” demanded Tumble.
“Humans have funny ideas about what smells nice. Take those horrible smells they keep spraying into the air, or the ghastly scents they dab on after they’ve had a bath…brrrr…for example.” Ruff couldn’t help but quiver when he said the word bath.
“humph!” snorted Tumble. “But you smell nearly as lovely as me and you weren’t dumped in the sea!”
“Ah!” said Ruff with a small smile. “The secret is to build up the smell slowly, a layer at a time. That way they don’t notice. Your trouble is, you went for the full scent in one big splat.”
“Big splat!”
“Yes, big splat. They were bound to notice when you jumped straight in and started swimming around.”
“Oh! Maybe you’re right,” mumbled Tumble. “I never really thought.”
“No. You never really do,” grumbled Ruff.
“Now you look here!” shouted Tumble, jumping to her paws. Her sudden movement dislodged something from the tangle of rope she had been lying against.
“Talking about looking for things, we have to look for my missing toys,” said Ruff, quickly changing the subject.
“Urgh!” groaned Tumble, flopping back down. “Ow!” She landed on the thing that rolled out of the ropes. “Now look what you’ve done!” she snapped at Ruff. “I wish you’d stop going on about your manky old toys!”
Ruff frowned. “If we don’t find them the Goblin Horde will invade the Pack Lands and we’ll all be murdered in our beds. And they’re not manky.”
“Yes they are,” shouted Tumble picking up the thing that had hurt her and hurling it at Ruff’s head, in the hopes that it would hurt him too.
The thing bounced off of Ruff’s head with a hollow thunk.
“Oi!” he barked. “This is very serious! If we don’t find my missing toys then…” Ruff voice faded away as he stared hard at the thing Tumble had thrown at him.
“It’s my ball! I’ve found my rubber ball! Hooray!”