No Matter What

by Nicole Jackson

  “What in the ghetto twins is going on here?” Dreka teased, as she approached Nunnie, who was posted up in front of Mix, while he leaned up against his car.

  “What?” Nunnie cheesed hard.

  “Bitch, you heard her,” Tink added. “Yall taking this shit a lil’ too far. Matching Burberry short sets? Come on, man,” she cracked up.

  Nunnie smiled brightly, truly in her bag. Mix had convinced her to wear her hair completely down, and she had the whole wild curly look going. She’d found the perfect dramatic lashes to frame her pretty eyes. Her brows were impeccably threaded. Her full lips were popping, and her skin was glowing.

  Dreka looked her sister up and down, feeling like a proud mama bear. She’d finally gotten her little swag together. Still, Dreka also noted the bag of saltine crackers Nunnie was clutching.

  “Nunnie, what’s up with those crackers?” Dreka interrogated.

  Leaning over, Nunnie spat on the ground. “I was a little nauseous earlier.”

  Dreka frowned. “Nauseous? What you doing nauseous?”

  “That’s the same shit I asked,” Mix interjected, while holding onto Nunnie’s waist.

  Studying Mix’s hand, Dreka quickly surmised that he was really trying to keep his hand planted near her sister’s stomach. His ass wasn’t slick. He was probably standing there hoping that she was carrying his ugly ass baby.

  “Look, I aint no doctor,” Nunnie groaned. “So, I don’t know what the hell is wrong.”

  Tink lifted a brow. “Bitch, did you bleed for the month?”

  Staring at the ground, Nunnie shrugged.

  Dreka’s scowl deepened. “What that mean?”

  This time, Mix flat out rubbed Nunnie’s stomach. “That means that we grown, Dreka. So, stop acting like you the mama. She late as fuck, but she’on wanna take a test, and I fault you for that.”

  Dreka jerked her head back. “You fault me?”

  “Hell, yeah. She so concerned about what you gon say that she avoiding facing the shit.”

  “Boy,” Dreka rolled her eyes. “Me telling Nunnie what I feel is right is just my way of looking out. She is 18 years old. So, there is still a lot of shit that she don’t know. Our mama is in prison, so we are all we got. So, as long as you deal with her, you gotta deal with me. We a package. Even when she aint fucking with me. Now, with that being said, if my sister is pregnant at her age, I’ma be in my feelings a little. I can’t lie. But I’ma be here. Ten toes down. That’s my word. And if she aint, I really wish that your ass would stop trying to get her pregnant, until yall get yall shit together. Like at least let her find a better job, and yall get your own house first. Damn, nigga. Fucking think.”

  Mix sucked his teeth. “Last time I checked, I was fucking grown, like I said. Besides, kids just push niggas to go harder. So, Ion see the problem. All I see is blessings.”

  Screwing her face in disgust, Dreka rolled her eyes. “Nigga, please.”

  Meanwhile, across the parking lot, Save and Yoni traveled through the thick crowd, attempting to make their way to the store.

  “Bae, you wasn’t exaggerating,” she voiced, as she strolled next to him. “It’s fucking packed out here.”

  Save nodded, as his eyes scanned over the crowds. “Hell, yeah.”

  “Damn, I bet it’s gonna take forever to get in this store, look at the line,” she said for the hell out it, hoping to make conversation. She was low key hyped as hell to be out in public with him, although he was being rather dry with her.

  Truthfully, Yoni knew that Save probably wasn’t ready to be with someone else, but he’d agreed to give them a shot and she was with it. Hell, she was going to take her chance to be with Savion anyway that she could get it. In her eyes he was literally the most handsome cat on the north and she was honored to merely be associated with him. There were several girls that would scratch her eyes out to claim the same. So, she was definitely going to bask in her moment.

  For Save, Yoni had been a decent distraction, with her light skin, slim and curvaceous figure, but there’d been no confusion about where he stood. Everybody knew that he had unfinished business with Nunnie but were trying to convince him to keep his distance. Everyone swore that it was in his best interest to let her go, fight his cases, get most of his charges dropped, hope that Nunnie and fam don’t show up to court, and take a plea for the assault on a family member. His niggas wanted him to move smartly, because they didn’t want him jammed up with all the work he’d put in for them. There had even been a rumor floating around that if Save got out moving around too recklessly that they’d pop him, while he was out on bond, because they couldn’t afford him being a liability. Therefore, he’d been weighing the pros and cons, telling himself that Nunnie wasn’t worth the trouble. It was simply time to close that chapter in his life, and face whatever consequences for putting his hands on her back at Marie’s. Letting go is what he’d been trying to do, but today was a different ball game.

  After glancing over the crowds, Save spotted Mix posted up in front of Nunnie, who was sitting on the hood of his car, swinging her legs. The two were clearly dressed alike and were openly kissing for the world to see. Right then, the disrespect couldn’t have been realer. Save, Mix, and Nunnie were all right there from Brewster, so everybody knew exactly who they were. Everybody also knew that Mix had taken Save’s bitch and was now publicly with her, kissing her, like he was in love and shit. In all the years that Save had known Mix, he’d never seen him be that open with any broad, but was now letting it all hang out with his bitch, no less.

  Save stood there, recalling all the times Mix would ask him questions about Nunnie. Intimate shit. Was she a freak? Did she fuck like she danced? Did he think that she’d ever leave him? Naively, Save had chopped it up with his boy, thinking that they were getting blunted out, trading stories. All the while, he was feeding the enemy the tools necessary to take his fucking place. Never in his life had Save felt so played. Manipulated.

  Standing there watching his onetime friend tongue the only girl he’d ever claimed to love down, stirred something deep down within him. That churning within his stomach quickly left a bitter taste in his mouth, as he hastily stepped away from Yoni.

  “Save, where are you going?” Yoni questioned, as she scurried after him.

  Pushing through the crowd, Save said nothing. Eventually, he stomped right past Dreka and Tink, bumping their shoulders in the process.

  “Hey!” Tink shouted, before realizing who’d rudely caused her to trip forward.

  Angrily, Save stepped right up behind Mix, who never saw him coming. “Nigga, I told you, you’d have to see me.”

  Dreka’s heart dropped down to her feet, as she noticed Save grip the butt of a gun, tucked into the back of his jeans.

  Protectively, Mix spun around, keeping his body wedged between Save and Nunnie. Save was merely inches away from him, as they practically stood nose to nose.

  “Nigga, I’m here. So, what’s up?” Mix gritted.

  Save smiled cynically. “Back up and let me holla at my bitch.”

  “BK, you aint got no bitch over here.”

  Save attempted to peek around Mix, but Mix moved right with him. “Nunnie—” he got out, before Mix shoved him back.

  “You aint got shit to say to her. Address me,” Mix growled.

  Once again, Save smiled, before charging at Nunnie, gripping her shirt. Of course, she screamed, causing both Dreka and Tink to react. They tried to pull her away, wanting to diffuse the situation. Frankly, at this point, Dreka knew in her heart that Save was fully capable of pulling his gun out and using it. What was most frightening was that she knew that he’d probably shoot any one of them, because he truly didn’t give a damn. And those were the types that you simply didn’t want to do battle with, if you loved your life and planned on keeping it. This wasn’t a game.

  While Dreka and Tink tried to pull Nunnie out of Save’s grasp, Mix unloaded a fury of blows onto his face. Ever alert, Dreka kept her eyes trained on t
he gun at the back of Save’s jeans that Mix was seemingly unaware of.

  “Mix, be careful. That nigga is packing,” she announced, just as Save finally scrambled away.

  Stumbling back a bit, Save reached for the back of his jeans.

  “He got a gun!” Tink shouted, as she grabbed Nunnie’s hand, and they made a run for it, along with all the other bystanders outside.

  Mix’s heart pounded in his chest, as he reached for his own pistol that was stuffed in his shorts. So, just as Save whipped out his .38 he pulled out his nine-millimeter. Save got the draw first and attempted to fire. Unfortunately, his gun jammed.

  “Fuck!” he vented, as Mix ran right up on him.

  In close-range Mix locked eyes with Save while dumping three bullets into his body.

  BLOW! BLOW! BLOW!

  Save’s body slumped to the ground.

  “Oh, my God, Mix,” Nunnie cried out, as she stood on the other side of his car, witnessing it all. Mostly everyone had run off, but she was so concerned about his well-being that she couldn’t leave…even with her life on the line.

  Mix spun around, waving her off. “Man, go! Go with Tink nem! I’ma catch up with you! Go!”

  She hurriedly nodded. “Okay, be careful. I love you. Oh, my God, I love youuuuu!” she boohooed.

  “Nunnie, let’s go!” Dreka shouted from a distance.

  Mix nodded, as he ran to hop into his car. “Alright. I love you too. Now, go!”

  ***

  The tears wouldn’t stop falling. They couldn’t. Nunnie’s reckless decisions had come back to haunt her in the worst way possible. The worst. Never had she thought that her creeping with Mix would turn into all of this. Did she expect a little drama? Sure. Did she expect to be talked about? Absolutely. However, nothing could’ve prepared her for repercussions of this magnitude. Nothing.

  Yes, Save would threaten her whenever he thought that she was playing with him, but what hood nigga didn’t? What boyfriend in general didn’t? Most times she’d just laugh his threats off, because she thought that his little jealousy was cute. It was harmless. Never had she taken into consideration that he was serious. Never had she thought that she was playing with her life, all those nights she’d lay with Mix in Marie’s house, hoping Save didn’t pop up. She really had no clue what she’d gotten herself into, but now Save had unleashed a pungent stank onto her life that could never be scrubbed away.

  Dreka sat across from her sister on her boyfriend Ted’s couch. She sighed heavily, as she glanced up from her cell. “They saying he aint dead. He’s at Bentaub in critical condition.”

  Tink, who sat right next to Nunnie, lifted her head. “Where did you get that from?”

  “His cousin Big Ashley just posted it on Instagram,” Dreka reported. “Her police ass is going on and on about Mix too. Make me wanna drag her ass. On God. Trying to fucking blame my sister,” she mumbled.

  Nunnie’s heart skipped a beat, after hearing that. Even after everything else, she still had to deal with bullshit. Save really tried to hurt her, but that was somehow her fault too. People were truly unreal, but at a tender 18, she was quickly learning that this was the way of the world.

  “Fuck them hoes,” Tink spat, rolling her eyes. “I can already see it. It’s finna be a whole lotta fights behind this shit, and I’m ready for whatever. The way I see it, all them hoes can catch these hands. Cause right is right and wrong is wrong. Aint nobody finna defend that bitch ass nigga in my presence. For real. I could feel the shit all in my bones. He wanted to kill Nunnie…and shit, he probably would’ve killed us too, just on GP.”

  “Exactly,” Dreka concurred. “That’s why Ion feel no type of way about Mix shooting his ass. He did what needed to be done. I can honestly say that nigga stood his ground and protected Nunnie like a man. So, fuck them hoes and what they got to say.”

  “True.” Tink cut her eyes at Nunnie. “We talk our shit, but he a real one. So, just calm down and let this shit play out. I feel like it’s gonna play out and yall are gonna be alright.”

  Dreka nodded, although she didn’t share those exact sentiments. Yes, she did believe that Mix was a real one, but she wasn’t sure if everything was going to be alright. Mix had shot Save three times, leaving him in critical condition. As of right now, he was facing attempted murder charges, which could possibly be upgraded to murder, if Save didn’t make it. Yes, there was a slight chance that he could beat those charges, but there were no guarantees. So, no, she wasn’t certain that everything would alright, but for her sister’s sake, she was praying that they would be.

  ***

  Nunnie was on the very verge of losing her mind. For a week now her life had been in complete chaos. Save was still in the hospital, fighting for his life, and she hadn’t laid eyes on Mix since the day of the shooting. She’d gone back to Gertie’s to gather some clothing, but didn’t feel comfortable staying there without Mix. Crazily, with the detectives actively searching for him, he hadn’t been home, and had been laying low, staying with friends. Not wanting to get Nunnie entangled in his legal woes, he’d been keeping his distance, which she didn’t agree with. She didn’t give a damn about who was looking for him. She needed to be wherever he was, but he wouldn’t hear of it. In fact, she hadn’t even spoken to him directly, which had her deep in her feelings. This world was too much to face without him, but apparently, he hadn’t caught that memo.

  After going back and forth about it, Dreka forced her to delete all her social media apps off her phone. According to Dreka, social media was detrimental to her mental health. For days on end Nunnie was going back and forth with people on Facebook and Instagram who wanted to offer their unsolicited opinions about her situation with Save and Mix. People actually typed up long paragraphs about her, running with false information, talking about what they thought. Never mind what impact it could have on her life after they were done dissecting her, only to log off and tend to their real lives. It was enough for a weaker minded individual to lose it. Thankfully, her older sister was keen enough to realize that she needed an intervention. Therefore, she’d disconnected from those toxic outside voices, and now only had to deal with the people around her.

  Standing stoically behind the register, Nunnie rang up a customer’s Jordan’s. Burdened with sadness, she’d forced herself to show up to work, because she couldn’t afford to lose her job. At least not right now. She honestly didn’t know what was in store for her, and that was downright frightening.

  For the past five days, she’d been crashing at Dreka’s sometimes boyfriend’s apartment. Ted was a handsome older cat that Dreka would often lay up with. No, he wasn’t the only guy she was seeing, but he was one of the more stable ones, so she’d stay at his place more often than she did with others. She’d also purposely squatted at his place, because it was big enough for Nunnie to tag along, right then. So, Nunnie would spend her free time in Ted’s spare bedroom, crying her eyes out, begging God to take the pain away. She was literally depressing everyone around her, so they all practically dragged her ass off to work.

  “Did you find everything you need?” she absently asked the customer, while focusing on the shoes in front on her.

  “No, not really,” he responded.

  “Oh,” was her only response, because she truly didn’t give a damn, either way.

  “You wanna know why?”

  “Huh?” she lifted her head, locking eyes with him. That’s when it dawned on her that she was dealing with a regular. The guy would come in and purchase shoes at least once, sometimes twice a week. He was undoubtedly a Jordan’s fanatic, but he’d also buy every other hot tennis shoe they’d have in stock. Not only that, but he’d usually buy at least three to four other pairs of shoes, telling Nunnie that he probably had multiple kids. Hell, he was so tall, chocolaty, and athletically built that she had to question if he was a professional athlete. With that being the Galleria mall, and him spending big bucks each time, the possibility didn’t seem like much of a stretch.

&nb
sp; “I asked if you wanted to know why,” he reiterated.

  She gave him a look of confusion. “Know why what?”

  He cleared his throat. “Why I didn’t find everything I need.”

  “Oh, yeah. Why didn’t you?”

  “Because I needed you to smile.”

  She arched her brows, as she pointed at her chest. “Me?”

  “Yeah, you. Usually, when I come in here, you’re smiling from ear to ear. It lights up the room. It rubs off on me. I smile, cause you smile. But today you got the saddest look in your eyes and it’s messing with me, honestly. I’ll probably carry this with me all day. And I’ll probably find myself wondering…what’s bothering you.”

  Nunnie squinted. “Now, wouldn’t that be a little crazy?”

  “Wouldn’t what be crazy?”

  “To burden yourself with somebody else’s problems.”

  He shrugged. “It wouldn’t be intentional. Like I said, it’s your energy. I’ve been feeding off it. Even if you didn’t realize it. Like, you’re one of the main reasons I choose to shop at this particular store all the time. I like to catch the good vibrations you give off. And I guess that alone had been satisfactory enough for me, without ever saying much to you, until I couldn’t get that from you today. So now, it’ll be on my mind. I’ll be thinking about what’s up the girl with the magical powers. She can usually make my day with a simple little smile, but she allowed something to take that away.”

  Nunnie tucked her lips into her mouth, as she fluttered her lashes. No one had ever come at her quite like this, as she was taken off her note. Without a doubt the dude was handsome, however, she was in no position to heed what she perceived to be tactful flirtation. The love of her life was off somewhere, ducking the police, while her ex clung to his life. Hell, she still didn’t know what she felt about Save’s condition. It was all too much to process, and the last thing she needed to do was further complicate her life.

  “Well, you know life happens, but I wasn’t trying to ruin your day, so here you are,” she offered him a weak smile.