Accelerate

by Kay Marie

  Everyone shakes their head and Bull slams the gavel, signaling Church is over.

  Chapter Eight

  Cali

  I’m pacing the kitchen, freaking out at the fact Ryan is here— in my bakery. I haven’t seen or spoken to him in five years and he decides to show up out of the blue?

  “If you don’t calm the fuck down, I’m going to need a Xanax,” Bash says to me. I stop pacing and glare at him. The kitchen door opens and my heart rate picks up.

  “They’re gone,” Wren tells me as she walks in. I calm down. “So, how do you know Buster?”

  Bash crosses his arms over his chest. He’s heard this story multiple times. I let out a heavy sigh and lean my back against one of the counters.

  “Short version— we met when we were nine. We were best friends through high school and decided to give dating a try. We had an argument one night about our futures which ended with him leaving. Never to be seen or heard from again. Until today,” I explain to Wren. Her jaw drops.

  “No phone call, letter, anything?” She sounds genuinely shocked.

  I shake my head. I had accepted this and have tried like hell to let go and move on. I thought I was making some kind of progress until I saw him. It made it clear how much I truly missed him. It also brought back all the pain from him leaving and I’m mad as hell at him. I never got the closure I needed. Maybe that’s what I need to be able to move on.

  “That doesn’t seem like something Buster would do,” Wren adds.

  “Well, he did,” I spit out and she winces. I hang my head and sigh. “I’m sorry, Wren.”

  “Oh, Cali.” She walks over to me and wraps her arms around me. I hug her back. My phone vibrates in my pocket, causing me to pull away from her. I take it out and I have a text.

  From Minx: Buster said to tell you to look for Alaska.

  My heart drops. In middle school and high school, before Ryan dropped out, we got a little creative with how we would pass notes. My favorite book was and still is Looking For Alaska by John Green. Ryan went to a used book store and bought a worn-down copy of it. He made it into a hollow book and we would fold our notes, put them in the book and pass it to each other. Sometimes, he would put the book in my backpack or my locker when I wasn’t around and would tell me to look for Alaska.

  “Cali, are you okay?” Bash moves to my side.

  “Yeah, I, uh . . . I just need to go check for something.”

  I walk out of the kitchen and go straight to the books. I scan the shelves until my eyes land on the one I’m searching for. I grab it and fan through the pages. It stops somewhere in the middle where, sure enough, there’s a note. I recognize the handwriting as Ryan’s. He starts the note by calling me sólnyshka, small sun. It’s a term of endearment he has used since we were younger. He used to tell me I was the light in his world of darkness. He tried to learn Russian multiple times, but only a little bit actually stuck.

  I’m sorry for showing up out of the blue, but I had to see if it was actually you. I’m sorry for what happened last time we saw each other and for never reaching out to you. I don’t expect you to forgive me, but I hope you’ll give me a chance to apologize face to face.

  He signed it with a heart and put his phone number underneath it. I fold the note again, put it in my pocket, and place the book back on the shelf. I keep my hand on the book for a beat, lost in my thoughts. What did he mean he had to see if it was actually me? How long has he been back? Where did he even go? I have so many questions I want to ask him, but I’m not sure if I can face him.

  “Find what you were looking for?” I jump and turn around.

  “Holy shit, Wren! Don’t go sneaking up on people,” I tell her.

  “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to,” she laughs out. I give her a small smile.

  “What were you looking for,” Emma asks as she walks over to us.

  “Ryan left me a note with his phone number,” I tell them. They both stare at me with wide eyes.

  “Are you going to text him?” Wren blurts out.

  “I’m not sure. Maybe, so I can get the closure I need,” I say.

  “Do you still love him,” Emma asks. I pause before answering her. “You do, don’t you?”

  “I don’t know. I mean, I don’t even know him anymore.” I sigh. “It’s been five years. We’re both different people now.”

  “True, but you could get to know each other again,” Wren says.

  “If you go that route, you need to make him prove himself,” Emma adds. She’s right, but maybe all he wants is to apologize then we’ll go our separate ways. I guess I’ll have to text him and go from there.

  “Do we have any special orders for cakes today,” I ask changing the subject.

  “Not today, and Bash has been on a roll keeping everything stocked and ready to go,” Emma says.

  “I’ll get started on doing inventory,” I decide. “Be sure to tell me if you need an extra hand with anything.”

  Wren grabs a book and sits to read. Emma goes behind the counter as a group of people walks in. I go back into the kitchen and start taking inventory there first. Once I’m done with food inventory, I move on to books. It’s three in the afternoon by the time I finish with inventory and ordering things we need. Wren is now on the clock working.

  “Wren, will you need a ride home when your shift is over,” I ask her.

  “No, my roommate is going to pick me up. Thank you, though,” she responds.

  Once I get home, I shower and change into some pajama pants and a tank top. I turn the TV on, but I’m clueless to what’s on. I’ve been going back and forth about texting Ryan or not. I cave in and decide to do it. What’s the worst that could happen?

  Chapter Nine

  Buster

  I’ve been sitting here for the past five minutes staring at my phone. She actually texted me. I didn’t bother thinking of what the fuck I would say if she did since I thought for sure she wouldn’t.

  From Cali: I found your note. I wasn’t sure if I would text you, but here I am. It’s Cali, btw.

  “Why the fuck are you staring at your phone like that,” Shade asks. I look away from my phone to him.

  “She texted me,” I tell him.

  “No shit?” He sounds as surprised as I feel. I look back to my phone and type out a response.

  To Cali: I wouldn’t have blamed you if you didn’t, so thank you. Can we meet somewhere and talk face to face?

  She doesn’t respond right away. This was a bad idea. I shouldn’t have asked her to meet with me yet. After a few minutes my phone pings.

  From Cali: I can’t tonight. Maybe later this week?

  I’ll take what I can get at this point. I’m the one who fucked up. I’m at her mercy.

  To Cali: How about Wednesday? We could meet for an early dinner?

  Again, she doesn’t respond, so I set my phone down and try not to worry about it.

  “You good, brother,” Shade asks.

  “Yeah, I’m good. I asked her if she would want to meet for dinner this week so we could talk,” I tell him.

  “Straight to the point, huh?”

  “I wasted five years not talking to her. I don’t plan on wasting any more time. I have a lot to make up for,” I explain.

  “If she’ll even let you. What happens if she has a boyfriend? Or wants nothing to do with you?” he questions.

  “Then I’ll leave her alone, but I have to try.”

  A couple of hours later, I’m laying in my bed, watching some Adam Sandler movie on TV. My phone pings with a text message. Glancing at it, there’s a text from Cali.

  From Cali: Wednesday works. Meet me at We Knead Pizza at 5:30 p.m. It’s right by A Novel Bunch.

  To Cali: I’ll be there.

  The next few days drag. There haven’t been any more sightings of the cartel, so they’re either laying low or were never here. My bet is on them laying low, waiting for us to let our guard down. Bull still doesn’t want us going anywhere alone. Which is how I end
ed up with Sketch tagging along tonight. He’s gonna hang out at the bakery while I have dinner with Cali.

  I’ve had a couple of prospects keep an eye on the bakery the last few days to make sure the cartel wasn’t around. So far, so good. I recall Cali telling me her father is a powerful man. I met him a few times, but never long enough to get to know him. She also has two older brothers who check in with her quite a bit. They threatened me a few dozen times in junior high and high school. They’re protective, but good people. One thing I’ve always regretted was not getting to know her family more. Her dad traveled a lot. I had dinner with her and her mom a handful of times. That was always fun. Her mom always cooked amazing meals.

  “Are you nervous about seeing her tonight?” Shade breaks me out of my thoughts.

  “Nah, I’m good,” I say. Shade makes a noise that sounds like a cross between a scoff and a laugh. I shoot him a glare.

  “Bro, it’s been five years. She’s gorgeous and she runs her own business. Which means she’s gotta be smart. Too smart for your dumb ass,” he laughs out.

  “Ha-ha, keep laughing, asshole. I wouldn’t blame her if she didn’t want anything to do with me. She’s too good for me.” I pause. She deserves more than I can ever give her. She always has. “I’m glad she’s giving me a chance to talk to her face to face. After tonight, the ball will be in her court.”

  We don’t talk much after that. I finish working on this car, clean my workspace and leave for the clubhouse. I told Sketch I would meet him here and since I still have a room here, I can get cleaned up.

  After I shower and get dressed, I head to the main room to find Sketch. As soon as I walk in, I want to walk right back out.

  “Buster,” Lexus draws out, stalking toward me.

  “Shit,” I mumble. “Not now, Lexus. I got somewhere to be.”

  “Aw, baby, stay with me. I’ll make it worth it.” She slides her hands up my chest. I grab her wrists as she reaches my shoulders.

  “I’m not interested,” I growl out, shoving her hands down. I storm out of the clubhouse, hoping Sketch is out here. Jackpot. He’s at the picnic table talking to Raze and Minx.

  “What’s got your panties in a bunch?” Shade calls to me.

  “Fucking Lexus, can’t take no for an answer.” Him and Raze both laugh, understanding how annoying that girl can be. Minx rolls her eyes. She does her best to ignore the cut bunnies.

  “B, I heard you have a date tonight.” She’s eyeing me curiously.

  “Yeah, Cali agreed to go to dinner with me.”

  She jumps up, squealing and throws her arms around my neck, squeezing me in a hug.

  “Fuck, Minx, calm down. It’s just dinner,” I tell her.

  “Just dinner,” she mocks. “She told me what happened between y’all. If she agreed to dinner with you, that means something. I’m pretty sure she still has feelings for you.”

  “I won’t get my hopes up,” I whisper. I hope that’s what it means. Minx gives me sad eyes.

  “You ready?” Sketch stands from the table.

  “Yeah, let’s go,” I respond. For the first time in a long time, my stomach twists with nerves. It rarely happens, but when it does, Cali is involved.

  “Good luck, B.” Minx hugs me again before sitting back down with Raze, who gives a chin lift.

  I jump in my car while Sketch climbs on his bike and we take off. I drum my thumb on the steering wheel the whole drive over, my nerves working in overtime. I arrive at the pizza shop five minutes early. Cali said it was right by her bakery and she wasn’t lying. It’s right across the street from it. I didn’t notice when I went to A Novel Bunch since I was so focused on seeing her. I watch in my side mirror as Sketch parks his bike in front of the bakery, and I head inside We Knead Pizza to grab a table. The entire time, I’m hoping I don’t look as anxious as I feel.

  Chapter Ten

  Cali

  I’m supposed to meet with Ryan in ten minutes and I’m hiding in my office at the bakery. Yury is here and will be staying here while I go on my date. If I can even call it that. I’m not sure if this will be considered a date. I glance at the feed of the security cameras. One of the Savage Menaces parks his bike right in front of the shop. I leave the office and walk to the front of the shop. Wren and Emma make catcalls at me from behind the counter.

  “Oh, stop,” I tell them. They both chuckle.

  “Seriously, girl. You are hot,” Wren says to me. I’m wearing distressed jeans with knee-high boots and a long sleeve top that twists in the back. The twist shows off a good portion of my skin. It’s sexy without being too sexy.

  The door opens and Wren’s eyes are the size of saucers. I turn around and the biker is walking toward us.

  “Hey ladies.” He gives us a flirtatious smile. His eyes find Wren and her cheeks flush pink. “I’m Sketch.”

  “Look somewhere else, dude. She has a boyfriend,” Emma tells him. Wren’s cheeks turn a deeper shade of pink and Sketch breaks eye contact with her, turning to me.

  “Cali, right?” I nod. “Buster is at the pizza shop.”

  “Thanks,” I respond.

  “Have a good time. Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do,” Emma sing songs and throws me a wink.

  “And what wouldn’t you do?” I tease her and she grins.

  “Keep an open mind. You both have changed a lot since you last saw him,” Wren reminds me.

  Sketch places an order as I walk out of the bakery. I stop at the edge of the sidewalk and glance at the pizza shop for a moment. Am I ready to talk to him? I spot him through the window. He’s sitting at a table, facing the window. He’s tapping his foot. It’s a nervous habit he’s had since we were little. Not much makes him nervous, so it seems as if our meeting has him as nervous as I am. The thought makes me smile and with a little more courage, I cross the street. When I walk in, he’s talking with the waitress. As she walks away, his eyes find mine and I make my way over to him.

  “Hey,” I whisper as I come to the table. I notice his eyes dilate as he takes me in.

  “Hey.” There’s a gentleness to his tone like he’s afraid one wrong word, I might shatter. He stands and moves to pull my chair out. Some things never change. I’m curious how many other women he’s been this way toward. I shake the thought away quickly. I don’t need to think like that. Hold your head high, Cali. I tell myself.

  “You look great, Cali,” he tells me as he sits back down. “I ordered your favorite, thin crust supreme.”

  “Thank you.” I smile. As I’m about to say more, our waitress walks over to us and sets a drink down in front of him.

  “Can I get you something to drink,” she asks once she’s done gawking at Ryan. I roll my eyes. He has his Savage Riders cut on. I’m sure it gets him all types of attention.

  “I’ll have a sweet tea please,” I reply. He keeps his eyes on me the entire time. I smile on the inside, trying to stay neutral on the outside. I don’t want to tell him I liked him doing that. The waitress writes it on her notepad and walks away.

  “I’m really proud of you,” he tells me. The corner of his mouth pulls in a sexy half-smile. I both love and hate that smile. “You have wanted a bakery since I first met you. Now, look at you.”

  At that, I can’t help but smile. I’m honestly surprised he remembers that conversation.

  “I’ve worked my butt off to get to where I am,” I tell him.

  “I don’t doubt that.” Our waitress comes back with my drink, pausing our conversation again.

  “Your pie should be out soon,” she says only looking at Ryan. His eyes are still on me when he responds.

  “Thank you.” The waitress pouts at his lack of interest and walks away.

  “What size did you order,” I ask him.

  “The biggest one they have.” He chuckles. We both love pizza so I’m not surprised. “Whatever is left over, one of us can take home.”

  He’ll eat at least half of the pizza alone, maybe more.

  “How have you been?
Are you seeing anyone?” There’s a look in his eye I can’t quite place.

  “Do you actually think I would have agreed to meet with you if I was seeing someone?” I say it with a bit of sass.

  “No, I guess not.” He smirks at me.

  “The bakery has been my life for the past three years. I honestly don’t do much outside of work.” There’s no sense in lying to him. His expression turns somber.

  “Cali, I want to apologize to you. Nothing I say will change the choices I made when we were younger, but it’s something I’ve regretted every single day since.” I didn’t anticipate this conversation happening so soon.

  “Then why didn’t you call, or hell, even text?” It comes out harsher than I intend but my heart is still bruised.

  “I was so ashamed of myself. Then it got to the point where I didn’t think you would even want to hear from me. I was young and stupid, and I had no idea what I was doing. As a result, I lost the best thing that ever happened to me,” he explains. “I’ve let a lot of time go wasted. I can’t change what I did, but if you’ll let me, if you’ll give me the chance, I’ll do whatever I can to make it up to you for however long you’ll have me.”

  A flood of emotions washes over me and I’m suddenly not hungry anymore.

  “Cali,” he whispers my name and I peer at him over my shoulder. “What do you think?”

  “Honestly, I’m not sure. I’ll need time to think about it.”

  “Of course. I don’t want to rush anything. Take your time. Just,” he pauses. “Thank you.”

  “For what?” I look at him confused. I’ve never seen him like this. He’s changed quite a bit since I last saw him. Naturally, the waitress chooses this moment to bring out our food. I turn away from them, afraid tears will fall from my eyes.

  “For this. For having dinner with me,” he says once the waitress walks away. He glances down for a second. “I’m sorry if I’m being too blunt. If I’ve learned anything in the last few years, it’s that time is valuable and I’ve already wasted too much without you.”