by Nikki Ash
Oh my God.
Chapter Three
Emery
I throw myself down on the couch with a grunt. After getting off work, the last thing I want to do is chase around a three-year-old, but I have no choice.
“Mommy!” Hollis shouts as he climbs up and jumps on me.
“Hey baby,” I say, kissing his forehead. “Have you been good for Aunt Ashlyn and Aunt Mila?”
My sister laughs. “No. That child is a menace. He takes after you.”
Hollis pouts. “She's telling stories, Mommy. I good boy.”
Ashlyn comes over and grabs him off me. “You're a very good boy, H,” she tells him. “Aunt Mila doesn't know what she's talking about.”
I smile as I watch her take over with my son. My best friend has been a godsend throughout his life. After finding out I was pregnant, I knew I had two options: I could either terminate and try to move on, forcing myself to forget it ever happened, or I could put the baby first. The answer was clear. And when my parents told me I was no longer their daughter because I was pregnant out of wedlock, I knew I made the right decision, because I would never do that to my son.
Despite the circumstances, I've done well. I have a small apartment for Hollis and me, but the neighborhood is safe and there’s space for him to play outside. I have a job that allows me to work from home. Mila and Ashlyn take turns coming over and watching him for me while I get work done. Honestly, I don't know what I would do without either of them. They have been my saviors in all of this. But out of everyone, Hollis has been the most important. He's everything, and every day that I watch him grow amazes me even more. I never knew I could love someone as much as I love him.
“But I want to play with Mommy,” Hollis tells Ashlyn as she carries him away.
She looks over at me and crinkles her nose. “It looks like Mommy needs a nap.”
“Mommy just needs to get laid,” Mila jokes, and Ashlyn and I cough to cover up her words.
Hollis giggles. “Mommy buys me toys when she gets laid!”
Oh God. “No, honey. It's paid. When Mommy gets paid.”
“Paid. Paid. Paid!”
Ashlyn puts him down as he scurries away. “What happened to that one guy you were seeing?”
“Yeah, what was his name? Jon? Ron?” She snaps her fingers. “Rob!”
I chuckle and shrug. “He had a tiny...”
“Aw, he had a push-pop,” Mila quips with a giggle.
“Push pops?” Hollis chimes in. “I love push pops!”
Ashlyn facepalms while I cringe. “Okay, maybe we should put him down for a nap before we have this conversation.”
“I've got it,” Ash says as she gets up and grabs him as he tries to run away. “Come on, little H. It's nap time for you.”
He struggles in her hold. “But I don't want a nap! I'm not sleepy!”
“Sure you are, buddy,” she tells him as he starts to yawn.
As my best friend puts my son down, Mila scrolls through her phone.
“Hey-la, your boyfriend's back,” she singsongs.
I look over at her like she's talking nonsense. “What?”
She turns her phone around, and an article about Harland is on the screen.
Sound the Sirens' Harland Storm is Heading Home to Weather His Own Storm.
Okay, whoever wrote that could have been a little less obvious. Still, I knew about all the shit that went down with Lindsey, because I needed to convince Ashlyn that finding her and slitting her throat was a bad idea. I didn't know he was coming home, though. The last time I saw Harland was when I was running from his house, and that's not a memory I like to relive.
The one secret I've kept from my best friend. The only thing in my whole life that I've never told her. The sole thing that could make her hate me—the night I spent with her brother and the result of that night, my son. The only person I did tell is my sister, which is exactly why she's looking at me right now with mischief in her eyes.
“He was already falling asleep before I even made it out the door,” Ash tells me as she comes back in the room.
My brows furrow. “I didn't know Harland was coming home.”
She looks confused for a second, and then her eyes go wide. “Shit! That's today?” She grabs her phone off the coffee table. “I've got to go! Love you!”
“Love you, too,” I call back to her as she runs out the door.
Meanwhile, Mila is bouncing her eyebrows at me suggestively as she shakes his picture in my face. I roll my eyes and throw my arm over my face.
I'm totally fucked.
There are certain times when being a mom is a little harder than normal. Take his birthday, for example. Trying to juggle working and taking care of Hollis is a lot, but add planning his fourth birthday party to the mix, and I'm a walking train wreck.
“What do you want at your party, H?” I ask him as he plays with his favorite toy dinosaur.
He looks up at me and smiles. “Presents!”
“Well, obviously.”
“And cake! Lots of cake!”
My grin widens as I watch his joy at such simple things. “There will be plenty of cake, baby boy. But what do you want for you and your friends to do?”
Not that he has that many friends. I've tried to get him out and socialize at the park and such, but whenever someone looks at how young I am, you can see the judgment in their eyes. I can practically watch as they do the math in their head and their eyes go to my hand to look for a ring.
Seriously, this isn't the 50s.
“Bounce house!” he yells and then proceeds to get up and jump. “Bounce! Bounce! Bounce!”
I can always tell when Hollis is getting ready to take a nap, because he fights it hard. He becomes overactive to try to keep himself awake. The problem is, if I let it happen, he becomes a total nightmare to get to sleep at all. Overtired toddlers are the worst.
“Okay, we can get a bounce house, but you need to take a nap for Mommy while I plan your party. Can you do that?”
His bottom lip sticks out in a way that always turns me to mush. “But I don't want to, Mommy. I’m not tired.”
“Even so, you need a nap.”
I reach out and take his hand and lead him down the hallway toward his room.
An hour and a half later, I've got the bounce house booked as well as the cake ordered, and a face painter scheduled. My thought is that the more there is for him to do at his party, the less he will notice the lack of other kids there. I have a few people coming, like the two little girls who live downstairs and the boy from across the courtyard, but sometimes I wish I had the money to put him in daycare so he could make friends.
I'm shopping online, searching for different presents he wants, making his wish list, when there's a knock at the door. There are only two people it could be, but being as Mila is at her friend's house, getting ready for her bachelorette party, it has to be Ashlyn.
“Why are you knocking? Just come in!”
Nothing. No movement comes from the door. No sound of keys on the other side.
I sigh and toss my computer onto the couch and make my way toward the entrance.
“Ash, I've told you,” I groan. “I gave you a key for a reason.”
But as I open the door, the words are sucked right out of me. Harland leans in the doorway, looking like everything I remember, only hotter. The scruff that lines his face makes me want to run my fingers against it and feel it prick my skin, and the look in his eyes shows all he's been through the last few weeks.
Fuck. Stay calm, Em.
“Same genetics, but wrong Storm,” he says with a wink. “Though I like to believe I'm the better of the two.”
I look him up and down. “Maybe for everyone else, but you know no one holds a candle to your sister for me.”
He hisses in feigned injury. “Ouch. Growing up made you cold.”
Cold isn't the word I'd use, but having to raise my son has made me harder. It's given me a level of confidence I didn't know
existed. It's made me strong. I let my eyes rake over Harland once more.
“What are you doing here?”
He gives me a boyish grin that five years ago would have flipped my insides. Hell, it still has an effect, just one I've learned to tame since then.
“I can't come see my favorite little sister?”
I damn near vomit in my mouth. “Ew. Don't call me that.”
Chuckling, he cringes. “Yeah. I realized as soon as I said it.”
The way he's standing there tells me he doesn't have any intentions of leaving, so instead of asking why he's here—a question I'm more than afraid to know the answer to—I step aside to let him in. He smiles charmingly as he walks past me and into my apartment.
“Cozy little place you've got here,” he says.
Yeah, and it looks a hell of a lot better with you in it.
Fuck, focus Emery. It's been less than five minutes, and he's already getting under my skin. As if I haven't been looking at a miniature version of him for nearly four years. How Ashlyn hasn't noticed the resemblance yet is a mystery to me, but I'm not about to point it out. Not when she'd kill me for it. Hell, she'd kill me if she found him here right now, but thankfully that could be justified as him just wanting to catch up.
“So, how've you been?” I ask him, guiding us into safer territory than my thoughts.
He shrugs. “Been better. Ex is a psycho. You know, normal shit.”
I take a seat on the couch across from him. “I heard. That sounds rough.”
The corner of his mouth raises in a smirk. “Don't act like you didn't know she was crazy.”
“I'm not saying that. I’ve always known she's a damn nutcase. But no one could tell you that back then.”
He looks down at his lap and nods. “I was a stupid kid.”
“You were young and in love,” I reason.
“Something like that,” he murmurs, but before I can question it, he changes the subject. “Tell me about you though. How's life been?”
We spend the next half-hour talking about random shit, and I honestly think it might be more than he's ever talked to me at once. I tell him about my job as a marketing executive for a small corporation, and he tells me what Australia is like, knowing I've always wanted to go there. With every second that passes, I start to calm, thinking maybe he's not here for what I thought after all.
“The spiders cannot be that big,” I argue.
He raises his brows at me. “I'm telling you, it was the size of my head. I don't think I've ever heard Rhys scream so loud in my life.”
I can't help but laugh at that thought. Rhys has always been a tough guy, except for the time he tried hitting on me when I was sixteen, and Harland looked like he was going to rip out his jugular.
Reaching over, he grabs a picture off the end table, and my heart starts to race.
Play it fucking cool.
“That's Hollis,” I tell him calmly. “I'm sure your mom or Ash mentioned him.”
He nods. “Your son, right?”
“Yeah.”
A small smile makes its way to his face. “He's cute. Looks like you.”
Don't blush.
Do not blush.
Shit.
“He's a total terror, but in the best ways.”
He chuckles. “That's what Ash said, that being around him for more than an hour and you're ready for a nap.”
“Pretty much,” I giggle.
Everything goes quiet for a second, and I start to look around the room for something I can talk about that isn't the little boy who's half his. I never expected this conversation so soon. Though really, I should have.
“So, how long are you back for?” I question.
He looks up at me, and it's written all over his face. There's no denying it. And he doesn't even try to beat around the bush as I swallow hard. With our gazes locked together, I couldn't break it if I tried. Instead, I'm stuck, just staring at him helplessly. Finally, he speaks.
“He has my eyes, Em.”
Fuck.
Chapter Four
Harland
For hours, I lay in bed, but I'm wide awake. No matter how much I toss and turn, there aren't enough imaginary sheep to count that could help me fall asleep. I mean, how is anyone expected to sleep after they find out they have a son they knew nothing about?
It took me days before I got up the courage to go over to Emery's place, after doing some detective work and sneaking the address from my mom's address book. And once I was there, I bit my tongue for a half-hour before saying something about him.
I guess I had hoped she would tell me first. Then again, if she had any intentions of telling me, she would have when she found out she was pregnant. And judging by the way Ashlyn never said anything, I'm guessing she doesn't know either.
“Ugh,” I groan into the darkness.
Rolling over, I grab my phone off the nightstand and scroll to the one person I've always told everything.
“Hello?” Vance answers, thankfully wide awake.
“Hey, man.”
“H,” he sighs. “What's wrong?”
I sit up and run my fingers through my hair. “Every time I think shit is going to calm down, I swear something else knocks me the fuck over.”
“Put him on speaker,” Rhys says in the background.
Of course they're together.
“What the hell happened now?” Vance asks.
The words feel foreign in my mind, and now that I'm about to say them out loud, it's a shock to my system. “I have a kid.”
“You what?” they say in unison.
Vance groans. “Please don't tell me you knocked up Lindsey.”
“No,” I answer rapidly. “God, no. Not Lindsey.” I pause for a minute, knowing the reaction I'm going to get for this. “It's Emery. We have a son together. He's almost four years old.”
“You fucked Emery?” Rhys squawks. “After you damn near decapitated me for even looking at her a certain way?”
Vance already knew. I had told him a few days after it happened. But Rhys has wanted in Emery's pants since she grew a set of tits and stopped looking like my little sister's sidekick.
“Focus, Rhys,” Vance tells him. “How do you know it's yours?”
I snort. “Well, for one, he could be my twin. I have no idea how she's kept it a secret this long, but it's fucking obvious. And two, she told me.”
She didn't exactly want to, but when I confronted her on it, there wasn't any room for her to deny it. And the second she started to tear up, I knew. Hollis is my son. I have a fucking son.
“That's shit, man,” Rhys says. “She seriously never told you?”
“Do you really think I would have abandoned my son by choice?”
“No,” Vance answers for him, and I can only imagine what face Rhys is making right now.
Prick.
“So, what are you going to do?” my best friend asks.
I sigh heavily. “I don't know, but I need to figure it out.”
The whole night, I barely get a wink of sleep. I can't help but remember the look on Emery's face when I all but told her I know Hollis is mine. The way she couldn't look me in the eyes as she nodded, and the feelings that rushed through me when it was confirmed.
I have a son.
A little boy who’s walking and talking and keeping everyone on their toes.
And then comes the realization that I missed out on so many milestones. His first steps. His first words. His damn birth, for fuck’s sake. They're all things I can't get back. Things she took from me.
The more I think about it, the angrier I get. I mean, I knew there was a chance after the condom broke that night. Especially since we fucked bare in the pool. But I thought that she would tell me if she got pregnant.
Surprise. I was wrong. Again.
Just like I was wrong about Lindsey.
As I lay in my bed, staring at the ceiling while the sun comes up, I start to wonder what my life would’ve been like if I had
n't gotten back with Lindsey at all. That night with Emery—fuck, it was everything I wanted for so long. She was always there, with her perfect body and innocent doe eyes. I wanted her, but she was off limits.
My sister was my other half growing up, and as much as I may have picked on her, I never wanted to do anything to betray her. Even now, she's too important to me. So, dating her best friend, and indirectly taking her away from Ashlyn, was something forbidden. I don't know if that made me want it even more, but I told myself I'd never let it happen.
Until it did.
After finding out we were getting a record deal, I knew I'd be leaving. I was going to be on tour, and everything in my life was about to change. I sat out by the pool and thought about it all, let it play through my mind, and then she showed up. Emery came out looking every bit like what I needed in that moment.
And I was weak.
She's always made me weak.
I gave in.
And I loved it.
But the next morning came with the shame and regret I should have felt the night before, when she was staring back at me like I hung the damn moon. So, when Lindsey came over to apologize, I convinced myself that she was who I wanted. And I took her back despite the heartbroken look in Emery's eyes.
I pull up to the park where Emery is throwing Hollis's birthday party. It's got a huge field where she has an obnoxiously large bounce house set up. There are blue balloons with the number 4 tied in every possible place, and a face painter table is set up by the playground.
A few little kids run around, and it only takes me a second to point him out.
Hollis.
He's adorable, with Emery's light brown hair and my green eyes. He even has her smile. He's perfect, but she kept him from me.
I go to the back of my truck and pull out the massive ride-on Jeep I got him, throwing it over my shoulder as I walk toward the party. Don't get me wrong, it's fucking heavy, but it's not a bad thing to let her see my muscles flex.