Lovers Hiatus

by Taylor Love

  Damond dropped down next to her and promptly took her cup. Gulping down a good portion of what turned out to be peppermint tea before she snatched it back.

  “And you, Mr. Wannabe James Patterson, are a bit of an asshole”

  “Is that the clinical term for it, Professor?”

  “No, your type of assholery falls into the Machiavellianism diagnoses.”

  “Hmmm, I like it. I’d like permission to use that line in a book.” Damon asked even as he was already scribbling it down.

  “Go right ahead. I plan to cite your name when I talk about anti-social behavior.” Janae retorted dryly.

  “So you know how I said I was thinking about having a female psychologist in my new series. I want you to be the consultant for me. I mean I’ve looked up some things, made up some. But I have you right here. Do you have an hour to go over some key scenes that I’ve written? Assess the lingo, and the thought process my doc might have.”

  “You really want to pick my brain?” Janae eyebrows lifted in surprise.

  “On the head shrink part, yes.”

  “Okay, fine. I can give you until dinner to help you out, but you have to cook and do the dishes.”

  “Like I said...vindictive.” He proclaimed shaking his head.

  IT WAS A WEEK LATER and Janae was sitting up in her office mad at the world. It was an unreasonable thought, she recognized that and still she hated everybody. After the first couple of slow weeks her work had taken off, which made sense. She had only needed to stitch her work and concepts together into a readable, interesting and teachable book.

  Now with about ten percent left, she only needed to summarize everything, but was suddenly thrown for a loop. Janae had covered a lot of ground on her topic and didn’t know where to start. She hadn’t written more than two paragraphs in the five hours she had been up here today. Using the time instead to pour over other chapters. Double and triple checking some of her research facts. Making slight changes to some sections even though this wasn’t the time for editing.

  “Dang it! Why is my brain fritzing out now?”

  Slamming back from the table she got to her feet and started a stomping version of pacing.

  “I want this to be done, but I’m worried about the peer review,” Janae said to the air.

  When someone a few years back with similar perspectives as hers published, a few people had tried to poke holes in every theory.

  “Jesus, I so hate the damn peer review system.”

  Janae flung a pillow from the bed to the other side of the room, as if that would hurt anything or even make her feel better.

  DAMOND TURNED HIS EYES to the ceiling again. This was twice now he’d heard her tramping around up there. He was starting to wonder what the hell was going on. She normally wasn’t this noisy. Plus, what had started as an irritation now had him curious. This time he finally stood up.

  “Let’s go see what the Professor is up to.”

  If she had been in her bedroom downstairs he might have thought she was packing. He was intently aware she only had one more week with him, or rather at the cabin. Damond could see Janae being an early packer, one of those people who re-checked a hotel room before they left. He was trying not to think on it too much—her leaving that is. Odd, when she’d first arrived all he could think about was how slowly eight weeks would go by. Now Damond felt they’d gone by too damn fast. He took the steps two at a time, as he wasn’t trying to disguise he was coming.

  “Hey, you cool in there?”

  “Please go away. I’m busy. I don’t have time to...play around.”

  Damond would have left it at that if her voice hadn’t sounded so tight and upset, so he opened the door any way.

  “Sounds like you could use a quick bre-”

  He faltered taking a quick look around the room. Seeing pillows strewn about, numerous papers and open books lying everywhere. Even when writing she was neat, and he’d never seen her work area no matter where it was look like this.

  “What in the world are you doing in here?” He was truly puzzled and became more so when she burst out in tears at his question.

  “I don’t know what I’m doing, that’s the problem!” Turning from him while wiping her eyes as she went to stare out the window.

  Damond was stunned. What in the holy hell was going on? Shit he hated a crying woman, it seemed like he never had a clue what was actually wrong.

  “Janae, tell me what happened...”

  Her tears still streaming she snapped around.

  “Everything is wrong! I’m almost done with this book. I’ve worked hard and you know what...it won’t be good enough. Someone will go out of their way to disprove it or parts of it. What makes it even worse is the fact I’ll still have to write another book, and another. All to prove I know my shit, even after all that damn education I’m still paying for. To stay relevant in my field period, and have a hope of being tenured, I have to keep doing this!”

  Janae threw her hands up and started sobbing in earnest. “I’m tired of keeping up. So damn tired, and yet there’s never any rest!”

  “Hey, hey, come here.” Giving her a hug, he wiped her cheeks. “What’s with the tears baby? You don’t cry at a strange, naked assholes in your cabin, my constant teasing or my snide remarks. Don’t let this break you down.”

  “It’s my work! I’m so close to being finished and tying it all together, but now I’ve hit a mental roadblock. Then that got me thinking was any of it good.” Janae left his arms and started pacing again.

  “This time around it’s only my name on it. No one or anything to hide behind. When folks in my specialty start picking it apart, it will be my concepts and ideas and knowledge they’re dissecting.”

  Damond sat on the bed and listened, when she took a big enough pause he finally jumped in.

  “Let me ask you a few simple questions. One, do you consider what you’ve written to be accurate to the best of your knowledge and research?”

  “Yes, of course I do! I wouldn’t go around pulling facts from the air.”

  “Two, do you believe your book flows and makes logical sense in the order that you’ve mapped it out?”

  “Yes.” Now she frowned, finally coming to a standstill. “I’ve made sure that each chapter flows into the next as an easy transition, and builds on what was discussed in the previous chapters.”

  “Great, now last question. And this one is easy. Do you believe you’ve done your best?”

  “Of course, I would never not do my best on anything, much less a text teaching and giving information to others.”

  “Well, there you have it.” Damond tossed up his hands. “Come here.” He waved her over until he could pull her down next to him.

  “Don’t let self-doubt win, that bastard plagues writers. Often when we’re near the finish line. It’s as if the weeks, months and for some years they’ve worked on something is suddenly all trash. It’s not. You have high standards, you would never put out anything subpar.”

  “I wouldn’t, would I. Thanks for saying that.” Janae burrowed into his side, feeling calmer already.

  “What you need is a new perspective.” Damond rubbed her back. “Focus on what you have accomplished already, not what you haven’t. Give yourself a break and then make a plan for wrapping this project up. Cut it into smaller sections if need be.”

  “Smaller tasks to complete a whole, are less stressful. I needed that reminder. Ugh, I think this is just my post period hormones and stress.” Janae wiped under her still dripping nose. “It’s only been over a day and a half, so my hormones are still fluctuating.”

  Damon was thankful her birth control made the time as short as it was, not to mention happy to know it was done with. It had been the longest five days.

  “Thanks for the gynecology lesson.”

  “You’re welcome.” She poked his shoulder. “Thanks for listening.”

  “No problem. Make sure I don’t need to do it again. I suck at being Mr. Sensitive.�
��

  “Aww, I don’t think you did that bad.” Janae praised him. “I’m impressed.”

  “Yeah, well don’t get used to it. We should get back to work.”

  Chapter Fifteen

  AFTER HER TALK WITH Damond Janae felt much better and chopped the last chapter down into sections to tackle one at a time. It was nice to have someone who understood writing and how it could twist you up inside or bounce her concerns off of. The fact that he hadn’t dismissed her feelings as being dramatic was unexpected. He’d been able to comfort her and give her a kick in the pants at the same time. Janae was able to settle into work so well, that she lost track of time, and didn’t hear him until he was knocking on her door again.

  “Come in.”

  “I was waiting for you to come down for dinner but you never did.”

  A quick glance at her phone showed it was already 6:45.

  “Sorry, I completely lost track of time.” Janae apologized. “I hope you didn’t start cooking. I’ll whip up something for tonight.”

  “Don’t worry about it. That’s not why I came up. I’m putting on some clothes so we can go out. I’d tell you to do the same but you look fine.”

  “Out? Where to?”

  “I’m taking you to dinner. And don’t ask too many questions before I change my mind. Give me about thirty minutes and I’ll meet you downstairs.”

  “Okay....” But she was already speaking to his back as he left.

  Looking down at her clothes, Janae rushed down the steps to her bedroom. He was taking her out on a date and she couldn’t stop smiling. Damond was often gruff and at times could be even cynical, but she’d learned over the last few weeks that he could be downright sweet as well. Jumping out of a quick shower, she took her hair down. Smoothing the waves and curls with some leave-in conditioner before turning her attention on what to wear.

  She wanted to look pretty for him tonight, to do something special, just as he was going out of his way to cheer her up. She hadn’t foreseen having a hot affair with a man while she was up here and had only brought basic underwear with her. Not that he had complained as he preferred her completely naked. But Janae wanted to look more feminine for him, sexy.

  Not long after they’d started sleeping together she had bugged him until he’d taken her to the closest mall. True she could have driven herself, but she had grown accustomed to being chauffeured. As a modern woman Janae told herself she should be ashamed, but it could be tiring doing everything on your own, 24/7. Having someone to do half the meals, drive and an ear to talk to, felt wonderful. Just knowing there was another “option” besides do it yourself took a lot of pressure off.

  After he’d grumbled for show they’d headed out to Station Mall which wasn’t that far from the center of town, but did happen to be on the other side of the St. Mary’s River on the Canadian side. It had felt good to get out the cabin and also have a little slice of city. They’d agreed to meet back up in forty-five minutes and parted ways. She hadn’t wanted him to see what she was buying because where was the surprise in that. Hitting the first women’s clothing store she ran across, Janae wasn’t impressed. Luckily the next place had a better selection. A red and black satin and lace underwear set, and a slinky long sleeve dress shirt had caught her eye and walked out the door with her.

  Tonight she would get to wear both purchases. As Janae got dressed she remembered the rest of that day. Once they’d met back up he’d surprised her by asking if she wanted to catch a movie, at the mall theatre. She’d easily agreed not even minding the action packed one he picked. Even laughing when he convinced her to sneak some food from New York Fires inside her purse for them to eat. They’d had fun, eventually checking out a few more stores together before leaving for home. If she really thought about it, that could count as their first date. Either way, she was excited that he had initiated dinner out tonight.

  DAMOND DIDN’T KNOW what the hell he’d been thinking organizing this dinner. But leaving her earlier today he’d been disturbed by the encounter. Crying didn’t suit the Professor at all, and he hadn’t liked it. Seeing that vulnerable raw side to her made him both uncomfortable and cranky for no reason, and all he could think about was putting a smile on her face. He’d take that lofty bored expression she sometimes used to ignore his antics, over that sad and defeated look in her eyes any day. So he’d hopped on the internet and started looking for places to eat until he found something she might like. Now he was downstairs, waiting for her to come out, and the wait was well worth it.

  She had on a pair of jeans that he was sure he’d never seen before, because who could forget something that molded hips and ass to perfection. The red shimmery top she had on, hung off one shoulder making him instantly think of licking the exposed skin. But it was her hair that stole the show. Left loose and pinned up on one side, only to cascade down the other. It made her look young and sexy. He was sure she could rival the students she taught.

  “You look great.”

  “Thank you. I hope I didn’t keep you waiting.”

  “It wouldn’t matter.” Damond ran his eyes slowly over her so she could see the appreciation in them. “It was worth it. Let me help with your coat.”

  Janae was touched and surprised how his simple solicitous behavior had butterflies flitting around in her stomach. Like she’d told him after their first time together, he could be charming when he wanted to. In the car Damond kept the conversation light, keeping her laughing with jokes and crazy stories. They both steered away from work and just enjoyed the serene nights drive into town.

  “So where are we eating?” Janae finally asked. “I’m just now realizing that I’m very hungry.”

  “You’ll see when we get there, which should be any minute now. I think you’ll like it.”

  “As long as they have food, I’ll be good.”

  Janae rethought that comment as they pulled into what seemed like a plaza parking lot. The outside of Fuji Japanese Steak House & Sushi was not impressive, but she plastered a smile on her face as he came to let her out. She did like sushi, and she was famished, so taste was her main concern right now. Inside was much better. The bright colors at the bar area, contrasted with the rest of the dimly lit restaurant giving it a nice ambiance.

  As she looked around spying on what people had on their plates, Damond had a brief conversation with a server, before they were led to a two-person table in a corner. It was the most privacy they would get in this casual dining setting and it was perfect in her mind. Settling down with menus, Damond quickly ordered some miso soup and a spicy salmon roll as starters. Only turning to her once the waiter was gone.

  “Damn, sorry I didn’t mean to order for you, I should have asked.”

  “It’s okay this time. I happen to love both those things.” Seeing his shoulders relax, Janae reached across the table to briefly squeeze his hand.

  “Plus I’m starving. So thanks for making sure I’ll be putting food in my stomach sooner than later.”

  “You’re welcome...I’m definitely ready to eat myself.”

  Janae’s face heated because he wasn’t looking at the menu but at her. She had been keenly aware of missing his loving once her period started. At the same time appreciating him not making a fuss about it. Damond had come to her room every night to rub her back. Though she’d felt fine, the hardheaded man had insisted. After feeling slightly put out, she’d felt taken care of, just like she did today. When their drinks arrived and they put in their main meals—the Hibachi steak and shrimp for him and the chicken and salmon for her—she turned to thank him again.

  “This was a nice surprise Damond. But you didn’t have to go out your way because I had a meltdown.”

  “Don’t flatter yourself Professor, I wanted some steak. Plus, I didn’t want to chance you throwing something and putting a hole in my wall. Remember, I’m invested in the upkeep of that place.”

  “Whatever you say.” She let him play it off. “By the way, thanks to your counsel I got a de
cent amount done after you left, so I’m feeling good about my progress and finishing before I leave.”

  “Yeah? Well good, that’s only six days away.”

  Janae laughed. “Don’t tell me you’re counting the days until I’m out your hair.”

  “Not quite.” His tone was somber, before he changed the subject. “So what’s next for you once you get back?”

  “Well...” She cleared her throat from the brief, but heavy moment. “When I leave here I’ll have couple of months to review and edit, then send it off to a professional set of eyes. I’ll be teaching one spring and summer class to make up for lost time. Classes start in May. Once my book is as good as it’s going to get, I send it off for the peer review, they have up to six weeks to look at it. Then my hope is to make it available for my fall classes.”

  Damond’s eyebrows rose. “In other words no rest for the weary.”

  “Exactly.” Janae played with her chopsticks, the reminder that their time was ending making her appetite wane. “How about you, aren’t you almost done?”

  “Yeah I am, should be done before this week is out with book one. Then I’ll immediately start work on the next. I’d like to have both done if possible before I hit the road. Then much like you, I’ll start the revision process. I’m hoping to have the first one published however by early August. Then release the second by December.”

  “You will. Don’t hope, just claim it.”

  Damond smirked. “Now you sound like my grandmother. She used to always say that.”

  “Didn’t all our grandmothers say that? But I have found that mind over matter does actually work and there is science behind visualization techniques. You know seeing yourself in a situation and succeeding ahead of time. Did you know they often teach this to athletes, as a way to psych them up and win?”

  “No, I didn’t. Tell me more, actually don’t. It might ruin sports for me.”

  “How would it?” Chuckling she rolled her eyes at him. “Help me understand your logic.”