A Case of Some Delicacy

by K C Kahler

  Mr Bennet and Sir William Lucas volunteered to be umpires, as usual, and placed the stumps at each end of the square. A coin flip determined that Mr Darcy’s team would strike first. Elizabeth opted to field short, though she adjusted her depth depending on the batsman. The match progressed splendidly, and everyone seemed to be enjoying themselves except Mr Darcy, who stood gravely on the side of the field flanked by Mr Collins and Miss Bingley. Under the circumstances, Elizabeth had to forgive him his gravity.

  Most of the gentlemen had removed their coats within a quarter of an hour due to the unusually warm temperature of the day. Elizabeth suspected they were using restraint while striking and bowling in consideration of the ladies. As a result, the game was casual and pleasant with light banter filling the air.

  Elizabeth’s only point of vexation was her estrangement from her father. Serving as umpire in the past, he would often make witty comments about the play. But today he remained silent.

  At half an hour into the innings, three of the batsmen had been run out or thrown out, and Mr Darcy’s side had scored forty-six runs. Mr Collins joined Kitty at the stumps. Mary bowled to Kitty, who usually swung at anything. She missed three completely but caught the fourth ball late, sending it rolling gently into the grass. Kitty did not bother to run, and Charlotte quickly retrieved the ball, returning it to Mary. Meanwhile, Mr Collins, despite the shortness of the hit, had begun to run. Lydia’s angry voice came from the side of the field, “Get back, Mr Collins! You will be run out!”

  He froze in confusion, then turned back. Mary pretended to bobble the ball. She could have easily knocked the wicket while Mr Collins was out of the crease, but perhaps she thought it improper to embarrass a clergyman. He was thus mercifully allowed to return to his place with some pride intact. Kitty missed the next two balls, and Mr Bingley came forward to bowl to Mr Collins.

  Though he bowled fast, Mr Bingley was inclined to bowl wide and give away extras. It would have bothered Elizabeth’s competitive nature if he were not so jolly about it. Mr Collins managed a hit. The ball took several high bounces and then rolled deep. He was so busy watching the ball that when he finally started running, he crashed into Kitty, who had already reached his end of the pitch. She stumbled backwards to the ground, the bat flying out of her hand. Mr Collins attempted to bow and apologise, all while still running—or rather lurching—in the opposite direction.

  Mr Saunderson retrieved the ball and threw it to Elizabeth, who decided that the safest course of action for all involved would be to put out the wicket before Mr Collins reached his ground. Her throw did just that, and he was out. After being helped up, Kitty chose to retire. This brought Mr Darcy and Lydia to the stumps.

  Mr Bingley grinned while Mr Darcy smirked back across the pitch, lending him a mischievous quality. Mr Bingley bowled his fastest ball yet, but it was wide, very wide. Peter Lucas, the wicket keeper, had to dive to retrieve it.

  Elizabeth called out, “Mr Bingley, a little restraint please. We prefer them to earn their runs, do we not?”

  “My apologies. I was trying to intimidate Darcy with the sheer power of my bowling.”

  “Remember that I have yet to bowl to you today,” warned Mr Darcy.

  “Indeed! Never was there a more fearsome sight as you when you are losing a cricket match.” Mr Bingley had mock fear in his voice.

  “But I am not losing.”

  Mr Bingley bowled a slower ball, and Mr Darcy hit it with a resounding crack. It sailed over the boundary, resulting in six runs. Lydia cheered and jumped, taunting Elizabeth.

  It was Elizabeth’s turn to bowl. She approached the pitch, and Mr Bingley handed the ball over with a shrug. Now she would end Lydia’s taunting.

  Indeed, Lydia would soon be chastened, but not by Elizabeth’s bowling.

  Lydia stood behind the crease, anxious to prove that she was no longer the second best cricket player among the Bennets. She would get no help from Mr Collins. What a laugh she had when he knocked Kitty down!

  She waited for the ball, expecting it would take a strange bounce. Missing Lizzy’s first throw, she huffed in frustration, but hit the next ball cleanly. It bounced between two fielders and rolled deep. With a hoot she set out to run, pleased to see that Mr Darcy was fast. They scored three runs before the ball was returned to Peter Lucas.

  “Well done, Miss Lydia,” said Mr Darcy. Although he was so very serious, he was quite handsome—and quite rich. What a shame he was such a bore. Lydia looked triumphantly at Lizzy, who rolled her eyes as she prepared to bowl.

  The first ball took a deceptive bounce, and Mr Darcy could only block it back to protect the wicket. They did not attempt to run. But he swung cleanly at the next ball. It landed between two deep fielders before it rolled to the boundary. Four more runs!

  Mr Darcy and Lydia batted through a few overs in this fashion. He usually reached the boundary, while she placed the ball well enough to score at least one run. Unfortunately, the hour time limit was soon upon them. Lydia’s team had scored seventy-eight runs. The players took a break for refreshments.

  Lydia sought out Mr Darcy to ask whether she could field in her normal spot: silly mid-on. Her quick reflexes often allowed her to catch or run someone out from that position.

  He regarded her for a moment. “I suggest you play short instead. There are new players today. For example, Mr Bingley bats much as he bowls—he swings wildly at anything.” Lydia laughed, and Mr Darcy continued, “We do not want you injured.”

  “I am not afraid, Mr Darcy.”

  “I can see that, Miss Lydia.” The fleeting appearance of his dimples stunned her. “You may field as silly as you like when the batsman is someone you know, such as one of your sisters, but stay farther back when any of the gentlemen are striking. Is that agreeable?”

  Lydia conceded before asking, “Where shall you put Mr Collins?”

  “Deep, very deep,” he answered solemnly.

  She burst into giggles. “I think that is wise, Mr Darcy.”

  “Thank you.” There were those dimples again. “Do you have any other suggestions about field positions?”

  Nobody ever asked her for advice. “Kitty is a surprisingly good wicket keeper. Walter Lucas would do well also. And do not allow Maria to bowl unless you want six extras given away.”

  He acknowledged her advice and then asked, “Do you bowl?”

  “Oh yes, pretty fast. But I cannot spin it as well as Lizzy.” He said nothing in reply, and then she remembered something else. “If Lizzy and Peter Lucas are paired up, they will stretch what should be a one-run hit into two or three runs. They are both very quick.”

  “I suspected as much from the way they fielded. Miss Elizabeth seems to enjoy cricket.”

  “Yes, Lizzy always preferred boy games to proper girl activities. She and John Lucas were thick as thieves growing up.” Lydia had always been jealous. John Lucas was the first boy she ever fancied. But he had been away for two years serving on a merchant ship.

  Miss Bingley emerged from behind Mr Darcy as if she had been invited into the conversation. “Miss Eliza is a regular hoyden. It was shocking to see her leaping about and catching balls.”

  “She is quite an asset to her team,” Mr Darcy answered.

  “I do not think it proper for young ladies to play cricket amongst gentlemen.”

  “I disagree. Georgiana and I often played cricket with our cousins and neighbours.” Mr Darcy turned to Lydia. “Georgiana is my sister. She is about your age. I taught her to play.”

  Miss Bingley amended her earlier statement, “Oh, playing with family is perfectly acceptable of course. But for Miss Eliza to be making a spectacle of herself among these officers and mere acquaintances, it is rather unseemly.”

  Lydia snorted. Unseemly?

  Mr Darcy responded more eloquently. “Again, I disagree. If Georgiana were here, I would be happy to let her play in such a friendly match.”

  Miss Bingley had dominated the conversation quite long enough in
Lydia’s opinion. “Oh, Mr Darcy, we should love to have your sister play with us! She must be very good if you taught her.” He smiled, making her quite giddy. “Does Miss Darcy have many fine gowns? And bonnets! Lord, I can imagine the bonnets she has, with you being so rich!”

  Just then, Elizabeth and Mr Bingley came over. “Shall we resume the match?”

  Lydia was pleased with her fielding performance. She bowled an over fairly well, and ran out Charlotte Lucas. But her proudest moment was catching out Mr Bingley, who did swing wildly at any ball that came his way.

  By the time Peter Lucas and Lizzy were at the stumps together, three batsmen were out, and Mr Bingley’s side had scored fifty-two runs. It was just as Lydia feared. Neither Lizzy nor their young neighbour hit powerfully, but both picked the best spots to hit the ball and ran so fast that they scored many runs. After two overs, Mr Darcy bowled again. Surely his spin would hinder Lizzy. Lydia moved even closer, certain that her quick reaction could make the difference. She wished desperately to catch Lizzy out.

  Mr Darcy’s first throw was wide, which disappointed Lydia. He always seemed to have such control. As she looked at him, she noticed he had rolled up his sleeves, as Denny and some of the other officers had done earlier. Lydia did not often have occasion to see men in such a state of dishabille—and certainly not gentlemen. She could not tear her gaze from Mr Darcy’s forearms. They were tanned and sinewy, hinting at the strength contained therein. How had he gotten so tan? Did he roam his grand estate with his sleeves rolled up, or did he go without any shirt at all? The thought made her flush. As she watched him bowl, Lydia was struck by his gracefulness—a masculine gracefulness that she had never seen before or simply had never noticed.

  Further thoughts on Mr Darcy’s fine bowling form were cut short by the sudden searing pain above her right ear, and then, darkness.

  * * *

  Jane ran towards Lydia in a panic. When she reached the gathering crowd, Elizabeth and Mr Darcy were both kneeling at Lydia’s supine form.

  Elizabeth spoke quietly, “Liddy, can you hear me? Lydia?”

  After a few moments, Lydia groaned and murmured, “I stood too silly.” Jane sighed with relief.

  “Oh Liddy!” Elizabeth cried. “Why were you not attending the match? Whatever had you so distracted?”

  Her eyes were still closed, but Lydia said clearly, “Mr Darcy’s arms.”

  Mary began coughing.

  “Stop coughing, Kitty. I am the injured one.”

  Of course Kitty defended herself, “That’s not me! That’s Mary!”

  Jane cleared her throat. “Perhaps if the crowd could move back a bit…”

  Charlotte and her father ushered people away from the scene, leaving only Lydia’s sisters and Mr Bennet standing near.

  Mr Darcy asked, “Miss Lydia, can you open your eyes?”

  Her eyes fluttered, but then Mrs Bennet’s lamentations reached the group. “My dearest Lydia! Has Lizzy finally killed you with her hoyden’s game? I knew I should not allow a cricket match today, but Lizzy insisted! Oh, speak, my poor child!”

  “Mama, your yelping hurts my head,” Lydia said crossly. “In the name of all that is holy, lower your voice.”

  “Oh!” Mrs Bennet cried in an agitated whisper. “She has been knocked senseless!”

  “No, my dear, that is the most sensible thing Lydia has ever said,” Mr Bennet replied. “Come, Mrs Bennet, let us summon Mr Jones for the girl. She is in capable hands for now.”

  As a sense of relative calm settled over the six remaining people, Mr Darcy asked again, “Miss Lydia, can you open your eyes?”

  She briefly opened them, but quickly screwed them shut. “It is so very bright. It hurts my head.”

  The afternoon sun was quite bright and warm. Elizabeth spoke, “You may keep your eyes closed, but Jane and I shall help you into the shade. Can you sit up?”

  “I think so.” Her head moved off the ground before sinking down again.

  Mr Darcy offered, “Perhaps I should carry her into the shade.”

  Elizabeth and Mary looked too shocked to respond, and Kitty started giggling.

  Jane answered, “That is very kind, Mr Darcy. Please take her over to the shade of the tree, and I shall wait with her there. Lizzy, will you see to the guests? Mary, will you fetch a blanket and a drink for Lydia? Kitty, go tell Papa what we are doing.”

  As the middle Bennets all rushed off to do their assigned tasks, Mr Darcy carefully scooped Lydia into his arms to carry her, and Jane followed behind.

  * * *

  Jane, Mary, and Kitty made their way upstairs after a very long day only to find Mr Collins perched at the top of the staircase, blocking the way

  “My dear Cousin Jane, your diligent care of your unfortunate sister has been most commendable. I can only aspire to one day be the recipient of such loving attention as you today bestowed upon Miss Lydia.”

  Although Jane appreciated the praise, she dearly wished to check on her sister. A blow to the head was a serious injury. Lydia should not be left alone for very long, and Mr Collins’s speeches tended towards the very long.

  “I thank you, Mr Collins, but I did no more than any of my sisters would do for me. Is that not right, sisters?”

  Behind her, Mary answered in the affirmative; Kitty only yawned loudly.

  “Indeed, how inspiring it is to see the sisterly devotion shared amongst my fair cousins. Lady Catherine would be most gratified to hear…”

  Kitty snorted and said something under her breath. Mary chastised Kitty in a hushed tone. Mr Collins was still going on about the ideal relationship between sisters, and at the moment, Jane’s two sisters were of little help in allowing her to escape his undivided attention.

  “…and I consider myself most fortunate to be connected with so affectionate and devoted a family of sisters.”

  Mary joined Jane on the top step. “Reverend Fordyce offers insight into the ideal sisterly relationship: ‘When I see two sisters, both of them pleasing and both esteemed, living together without jealousy or envy, yielding to one another without affectation, and generously contending who shall do most to advance the consequence and happiness of her friend, I am highly delighted: dare I add the more highly, that such characters are not very common!’”

  “That is precisely right, Cousin Mary! To see such exemplary conduct from my five cousins is indeed a delight!”

  If only Jane could get away while he and Mary discussed Fordyce! While searching in vain for an escape route, she caught sight of Elizabeth peeking from behind her bedroom door. Kitty again yawned noisily, such that the sound echoed through the hallway.

  Jane attempted a graceful exit. “We thank you for the sentiment, Mr Collins, and now bid you a good night. Kitty, as you can see, is quite fatigued.”

  Mr Collins did not seem ready to remove himself from their path. In fact, his attention was fixed on Jane in a most disconcerting manner. “Dear Cousin Jane—” he began, but was interrupted by Kitty yawning once again, making an exaggerated show of covering her mouth.

  The click of a door was heard. Jane thought Elizabeth would swoop in as she had been doing lately, but instead, it was her father’s aggravated voice. “What on earth is that sound? Is a goose being strangled in the hallway?” He did not wait for an explanation. “Well, girls, take yourselves and any geese present to your rooms and be quiet.”

  The girls scampered off to their respective doors while Mr Collins went into the guest room. After several minutes of silence, three doors were cracked open. In a flurry of nightgowns, Elizabeth, Jane, and Mary flew across the hall to Lydia and Kitty’s room.

  * * *

  Lord, how her head hurt! Lydia could not remember what had happened immediately after her injury, but she blushed in humiliation at the memory of her foolish display. If she had only been paying attention, she could have caught Lizzy out. It would have been her greatest moment of triumph. Instead, she had done the one thing that should not be done when playing silly—s
he had taken her eye off the ball.

  As she lay on her bed, Lydia heard a strange noise in the hallway outside her door. After a few moments, all of her sisters entered to check on her.

  Perhaps the best indication Lydia’s injury was not serious was the return of her natural curiosity, her desire to know all. “What was that commotion in the hallway?”

  Elizabeth sat on the edge of the bed. “Mr Collins was wishing his fair cousins a good night. Do you regret not being included in his felicitations?” Lydia snorted before Elizabeth gently turned her swollen temple towards the candlelight. “Oh, Liddy, I am so sorry!”

  “It is not your fault. My own inattention caused it.”

  “Does it hurt terribly?” Kitty asked.

  “It is a dull ache now. But at first I thought I would go blind with the pain. How did I end up sitting under the elm with Jane, so far from the pitch? I do not remember.”

  Jane moved to sit at the head of the bed and put her arm around Lydia. “Well, Lizzy was striking and you were standing very close; you probably remember that.”

  Lydia listened while her sisters filled in the gaps of her memory. There were some embarrassing bits, but what was the use of dwelling on them? Besides, all of that paled in significance to one detail.

  “Mr Darcy carried me to the elm? How wonderful! I am sure he lifted me as if I weighed nothing at all! I knew his arms were strong!”

  “Lydia! You were caught gawking at those arms,” Elizabeth chided.

  “So? I daresay you were all admiring one or another of the gentlemen’s arms.”

  “Even if that were the case, we would not admit as much to the object of our admiration. Mr Darcy knows you were ogling him!”

  “Surely being struck insensible is ample excuse for anything I ought not to have said. I shall worry about it no longer. But I shall thank Mr Darcy for carrying me the next time I see him. He is so gallant!”

  “He offered to send for his physician from London if Papa wished.” Mary showed a hint of satisfied pride when they all reacted with astonishment at her news. “Of course it was not necessary, but it was a very generous offer.”