The Child Guard

by Lorcan Montgomery

  “That’s as may be, but it doesn’t need to stain your skin forever too. Besides, it looks like righteous justice to me. You were defending the camp from those who would have harmed us.”

  “You can’t put an optimistic spin on this, Davena. I must serve a penance.”

  “And is that for you to decide?” Davena’s eyes blazed. “Who died and made you High Priest? We are only Immaculatii, we do not decide or distribute penances. If you are so intent on your wrongdoing then you can confess before the priest in Auris, and he will decide what is to be done with you. But until then, I absolutely will not have you smelling like a charnel-house and attracting flies! To the stream with you!”

  Sampson stood up immediately, then paused as he realised he’d done it.

  “Are you giving me orders?” he asked, with a stern expression.

  “Yes I am, and I will continue to do so until you come to your senses and stop this moping!” Davena barked at him, standing her ground against his steely gaze.

  “I wouldn’t argue with her if I were you,” Kane said, and Sampson gave him a betrayed look before turning on his heel and marching off to the river.

  Davena turned to Kane, and if he thought he was going to be let off lightly for supporting her, he was sadly mistaken.

  “That’s your job, Brother-Corporal,” she said, crisply. “You can’t let anyone mope or sit brooding like that, misery festers and paralyses if let alone and out here it’s unsafe. When they get out of these Borderlands, to safety, then they can sit and contemplate their actions, talk until their tongues bruise, weep and pray for forgiveness. But right now they need to move, to do, to busy their minds with tasks until we have done what we need to do.”

  “Understood,” he said.

  Her face softened, and she reached out to lay a small hand on his shoulder.

  “That goes for you, too,” she said. “I can see you’re hurting over what’s occurred and I can see that you’d rather not be the one everyone relies on right about now but you have to. You can’t just lie down and give up. That’s why you must move, and do, and keep your mind busy. When we get out of here, if you need to talk about it then, you just let me know. But not before.”

  She patted his cheek, in a maternal fashion. “Now, to check Sampson isn’t staring into the water contemplating his existence,” she said, and strode off in the direction of the small stream.

  Kane watched her go for a moment or two, then stood up. His joints clicked, but he ignored them and went to check round the tents.

  His first instinct was to check on Eder, but assuming the situation hadn’t changed since he’d left the tent Eder was likely to be fine. Instead he headed to Terrell’s tent, to see how he was coping after the attack from Sophia.

  As he stuck his head into the tent, Terrell seemed to be curled up asleep, so Kane reached over to shake his shoulder gently. There was a blur of motion, and he found himself forced down onto his elbows and knees, as the point of a hunting knife pricked the soft flesh under his chin.

  “Oh,” Terrell said, sleepily. “It’s you.”

  Despite that, it seemed to take an unnervingly long time for the blade to be moved and Kane to be released.

  “Expecting someone else?” Kane said, rubbing his chin and seeing a smear of blood on his fingers.

  “Well that mongrel witch might come back still,” Terrell stowed his knife in its sheath, and sat, curled up into a small ball in a corner of the tent. “Her kind like to finish what they start.”

  Kane couldn’t pinpoint the odd note in Terrell’s voice. There was bitterness, yes, and shame, but there was something else, too.

  “Just came to see how you were holding up,” Kane said, awkwardly.

  “I’m just peachy, really,” Terrell said, voice dripping with sarcasm. His face twitched, expression briefly disgusted. “Absolutely fantastic. You saw what happened; how do you think I’m holding up?”

  “We didn’t see anything, Terrell, all we saw was you met her eyes and then you fell over.”

  “It was all- all in my head?” Terrell seemed stunned, but once again the fleeting expression of revulsion crossed his face. “She didn’t… didn’t touch me?”

  “She was about three feet away the whole time.”

  “But I-“ Terrell stopped and shook his head like he was trying to get water out of his ears. “I thought everybody had seen. The things she showed me, Kane, you wouldn’t believe.”

  Kane leaned back, fear blossoming in his stomach at Terrell’s words. What if Terrell had already fallen under Sophia’s spell and was now lost forever? Kane shook the thought away hastily. Terrell sounded haunted, traumatised, not a thrall longing to do Sophia’s bidding. He seemed to be burdened by the visions he’d seen, but he didn’t elaborate on what they had been, just remained staring at a point somewhere in the middle distance. There was silence in the tent, aside from the occasional rustle of fabric as Terrell fidgeted back and forth. Kane didn’t know what to say, he thought about mentioning his strange dream but it hadn’t been the same at all, it hadn’t been real.

  “I want her to come back,” Terrell said, with a hint of a whine in his voice. “But I don’t know if I’d kill her or if I’d end up begging her to do it again.”

  “You’re stronger than that, Terrell,” Kane said, reassuringly. “You won’t succumb to her so easily a second time.”

  “But part of me wants to,” Terrell whispered. “Something in me just wants to lie back and surrender to her. You don’t understand how good it felt. She didn’t do it to you.”

  “No, I don’t understand what it was like,” Kane admitted. “But I do know that you’re not going to roll over and be the pet of a Sidhe. There might be a part of you which wants to, but we both know there’s a bigger, stronger part of you which would never, ever surrender to that sort of humiliation.”

  Terrell closed his eyes, and drew in a deep breath, seeming to inhale Kane’s words and draw strength from them.

  “You’re right,” he said, at length. “If I see that Sidhe witch again, I’ll kill her.”

  “Good man,” Kane said, and clapped him on the shoulder. “Now, we need to get the camp struck and get the squad moving again as soon as possible. Can I count on you?”

  Terrell nodded, but his eyes were still focused on some distant vision. Kane left him to his preparations, and went to check the rest of the camp. He found his feet automatically heading towards his and Eder’s tent, and again veered away, heading to check on Cahaya instead.

  He tapped on the canvas, politely, and upon receiving no response pushed the flap open. Cahaya lay asleep like a child, arms thrown out in different directions. Her curly hair tumbled about her face, which was flushed with sleep. Her eyes were open slightly, and Kane thought he could see colour beneath the line of her eyelashes. Her chest was still, as he watched, and he began to panic.

  He crawled over, and patted her face, awkwardly. Still nothing. Frantically, he cast about him for an inoffensive place to touch in order to wake her. He settled on the soft flesh on the underside of her upper arm, grabbed it between his fingers and pinched.

  There was a desperate, rattling gasp, and Cahaya sat up, colliding with Kane. She clung to him, fingers clutching at his hair, his clothes, anything tangible she could get a grip on. Her eyes were still blank, and white, but they stared around the tent in blind panic. She was shaking, and Kane gingerly put his arms around her to try and warm her up. If Terrell came in there would be hell to pay, but he didn’t know what else to do.

  She collapsed against him; great, gulping sobs shaking her small frame, and Kane was unsure what to do other than pat her shoulder hesitantly.

  “It’s okay, you’re awake now,” he said, soothingly, as her sobs subsided. “It was only a bad dream.”

  “I couldn’t… I tried…don’t give in, please, please…” she gasped, clutching at his collar. “It was her… it was her, she’s got you, she’s taking you and I can’t...”

  “We’re all fin
e, Cahaya, calm down. She’s long gone.”

  “She’s still a-hunting before the sun rises, setting traps for little rabbits to break their backs,” Cahaya said in a sing-song voice that wasn’t her own.

  Little rabbits.

  Kane went cold all over. He scrambled to disentangle himself from Cahaya’s grasping hands, but she hung on with a death-grip, still in the chill embrace of her nightmare.

  “Sorry about this,” he said, then slapped her smartly across the mouth. She let go of him in shock, and as he fled the tent he continued to apologise, grimacing as the handprint formed on her cheek. He ran for his tent, ignoring the curious look from Terrell, and dived through the opening, landing on top of Eder.

  The blankets had wound around Eder as he tossed and turned, and now they were wrapped around his struggling limbs as he fought against his own nightmare. Kane reached out to disentangle him, and received a flailing backhand to the face for his troubles, leaving him dazed and disorientated. He clambered on top of Eder, despite the wriggling, and took Eder’s head in his hands.

  “Wake up,” he pleaded. “Please, wake up and see me.”

  Eder’s eyes shot open, huge pupils surrounded by a ring of bluish-green. He stared, unseeing, at Kane, still fighting.

  “Gods have mercy… take me…” he wheezed, his voice faint and strained as his chest heaved to take a breath he couldn’t quite catch.

  “Eder, please come back,” Kane said, looking into those unnatural eyes with despair. “It’s me, I’m here, I’ll make it better.”

  Eder’s back arched convulsively, still fighting for the breath he seemed to be choking on.

  “...name of the Sister… no more… please no more!” Tears sprang from the corners of Eder’s wide open eyes as he sobbed hoarsely.

  “You can fight her, Eder, I know you can,” Kane said, ignoring the clawed fingers scrabbling at his arms and the back of his hands. Eder’s breath rattled in his throat, like someone was throttling him in his dream, and his struggles became weaker, fainter, but the huge black eyes were still staring at Kane as though he were a monster.

  “Please, Eder, come back to me,” Kane murmured, pressing his face to Eder’s in desperation, first forehead to forehead, and then in a brief, crazy moment of daring, mouth to mouth, feeling Eder’s dry lips against his own.

  All at once, the struggling stopped, and as Kane drew back, feeling inexplicably guilty, he saw Eder’s pupils shrink to normal size, blinking in confusion as he drew in a huge breath.

  “Kane?” he asked, cautiously.

  “Yes, Eder, it’s me.”

  “I was – there was the most awful dream. It was a dream, wasn’t it?” Eder’s voice was faint, and Kane had to strain to hear him.

  “It was a nightmare, Eder, a bad one, but I promise you’re awake now.”

  “You were in my dream.” Eder didn’t elaborate further, and a shudder ran through his whole body. “Are you real? I can’t tell.”

  Kane felt a strong urge to kiss him, as proof, but instead gave Eder a light pinch on the shoulder. Having thus confirmed his realness, he abruptly remembered he was sitting astride Eder’s body, and he scrambled hurriedly off.

  “We should be moving soon,” he said, gruffly. “Get packed as quickly as you can, we’ll eat when we’re away from here.”

  He ducked out of the tent, leaving Eder bleary-eyed and confused.

  Naturally, the next day’s march was another trudge of exhaustion, still reeling from the fight and what appeared to be an attack in their dreams the next morning from Sophia. Once Cahaya was fully conscious and aware, after apologising profusely again for striking her, he had asked her about it, and whilst she had answered to the best of her knowledge, she couldn’t explain how or why Sophia had struck back, nor how she knew it to be so. Kane chalked it up to another unsolvable mystery, and continued on with his day.

  The one plus side to the whole affair was the reaction of Eder.

  Kane hadn’t been able to forget the ultimatum Eder had given Sophia, the cool calmness in his voice as he’d drawn his bow. It was the one memory of the night he didn’t mind revisiting, seeing Eder ready to defend him, almost as though he’d been staking a claim. But that was surely wishful thinking, Eder had made it perfectly clear he didn’t want anything to do with Kane; coming over to comfort him after the fighting was done was surely a one-off, an exception birthed by shock and trauma. As for the brief, desperate kiss which had awoken Eder from Sophia’s nightmare; he didn’t even know about it, hadn’t agreed to it and therefore it was highly unlikely to be repeated.

  Kane had been surprised when Eder had approached him after breaking their fast, just before they set off on the long day’s journey.

  “Are you all right?” he asked, quietly, and Kane was so taken aback it took him a moment or two to reply.

  “I’m standing, aren’t I?” he replied, trying to put a brave face on the whole thing. “Nothing I can’t walk off.”

  “That wasn’t what I meant,” Eder said mildly. “But if you’re well enough to be flippant then I suppose you can’t be too upset.”

  “I’m…” the word ‘fine’ died on his lips as he looked at Eder. “I’ll survive. We all will. Nightmares and Changelings aside.”

  Eder shuddered at the mention of nightmares. “Don’t remind me,” he said. “You don’t suppose she’ll come back again, do you?”

  “Not with you and your bow about, I shouldn’t think, not after you shot her.”

  “Shot at,” Eder said, with a rueful laugh. “I wasn’t sure if shooting the person nominally under your protection without a fair warning would be appropriate.”

  “Still, you got her to leave off me. You might have saved my life.”

  “That’s a trifle dramatic,” Eder said, but there was a trace of pink in his cheeks. “Besides, we keep each other safe. That’s what a squad does. We look after each other.”

  “Thank you.”

  There was a pause, everything unsaid between them still hanging in the air, unresolved.

  Eder smiled. “You’re welcome,” he said. “Just try not to get into too much trouble in future.”

  The remainder of the day, through his tiredness, through the worries and the confusion, Kane’s heart was lightened by that brief conversation, and the feeling that no matter what had occurred, things would return to normal. Unsaid and unresolved could wait.

  16. The Fiorella

  “A woman in her full power is a man’s worst nightmare.”

  Siminan proverb

  That night was a restless, anxious one, but for all their tension and twitchiness Sophia did not return, whether in person or in spirit. Kane was heartily thankful for her absence, but couldn’t rid himself of the nagging thought of her, like an itch at the back of his mind, never quite forgotten.

  She was not mentioned around the campfire, very deliberately. Instead the squad took refuge in what passed for normality. Terrell ate more than seemed to be humanly possible, Sampson made waspish comments about it, and the whole thing dissolved into relatively good-natured bickering as Davena chuckled at their increasingly colourful insults and half-heartedly bade them behave. Even Cahaya joined in, siding with Davena, as the conversation degenerated into silliness and levity. Nobody seemed to have any inclination to go to their tents and try to sleep, and Kane recognised their avoidance for what it was. As the sun set and no Sidhe song began, he dismissed them and settled down to sit a first watch.

  Eder stayed with him for a while, until Kane caught him yawning one too many times and marched him to the tent to get some sleep. He fancied Eder leaned against him deliberately as they crossed the camp, but that ridiculous, fleeting thought disappeared after a moment.

  No nightmares-that-were-not-nightmares came to torment them, and the next day found them with renewed energy, more so when the light brightened up ahead. Around mid-morning, the forest retreated around them, and they found themselves on the shores of a mighty lake.

  “This appears to
be Lake Spéir,” Kane said, after consulting their map. “We are out of the Borderlands, from here it’s a four day ferry and ten days’ march into Auris itself.”

  Terrell let out a cheer, which was joined by Davena and Cahaya. Even Eder clapped his hands and Sampson gave a stiff nod.

  “If we head west, skirting the woods, we should reach a bridge that leads to the town of Dathanna, where we can catch a barge heading down the river towards the sea, and towards Auris.”

  “What are we waiting for?” Davena said, brightly.

  “What, indeed,” Kane replied, and they set off down the bank of the lake.

  “We did it,” Eder said, quietly, as he drew level with Kane. “We made it through.”

  “Aye, we did,” Kane said, feeling better than he had in weeks now the oppressive weight of the Sidhe forest was gradually being put behind them.

  “Well done.”

  He turned to accept Eder’s congratulations, or possibly dismiss them as unearned, but his friend had already dropped back to walk alongside Davena, making sure she could keep up through the thick springy grass of the lakeside.

  They reached the bridge to Dathanna in the middle of the afternoon. Kane had quite forgotten how hot it could get in the afternoon with no trees to provide shade, particularly now they were so far south, and they were sweaty and sunburnt by the time they arrived at the bridge.

  It was a sturdy stone construction which had stood the test of time despite the tread of hundreds of feet. The guards at the entrance to the bridge gave them the briefest of glances, but their Child Guard surcoats were passport enough and they were waved through without Kane needing to present his papers. He felt a little disappointed.

  The town of Dathanna, despite being similarly situated, was not very much like Woodedge. It had grown up on a small peninsula, pinched between Lake Spéir and one of its distributary rivers. Three sides of the town were surrounded by water, and the fourth, facing the western forest, was shielded by a wall of stone, tipped with iron, which had fallen into disrepair in places.