I Am Adam

by J.T. Twerell

  Chapter 8

  Year 9

  Eve sat under the tree on the high hill and watched the children play in the lake below. While she greatly enjoyed playing with them, it was the quiet times in the hills that she truly loved. From up here she could see the large clearing filled with sheep that Star and Wellna took care of every day. She noticed that Moon was with Star almost all the time, and Star enjoyed her being with him out in the fields. Dawn loved to be with the little ones, and it seemed like Wind and Sun were able to make enough little ones to keep Dawn very busy. She felt his presence and said in her mind, "Hello Domatarious."

  "Hello Eve," she heard in her mind. "How are you feeling today?"

  Turning she saw him standing behind her, and felt the peace and comfort he brought by simply looking at her. "I am very well and very happy today. It is peaceful up here and your being with me is even better."

  "I sensed you were bothered by something. Is there anything you want to talk about?"

  "Something is different out there," Eve said as she pointed out toward the distant valley. "It troubles me when I feel things I do not know and understand."

  "What is it you are feeling, Eve?" Dom asked as he sat next to her.

  "It is how my belly feels when I am hungry, but it is not in my belly, it is more in here." She said as she pointed to her heart. "It feels empty and hurting. I feel it more when I look out at the far places and try to see if anything looks different."

  "That is a feeling of loneliness Eve. It comes when you are alone and do not want to be. You do not feel alone with the others because you have many around you and there is a strong feeling of love."

  "Why do I feel it if I am not alone?"

  "You are feeling something from someone else, Eve, and it is a strong feeling. When you have these experiences, they are to help you understand what is going on beyond what you are able to see."

  Eve thought about this for a while, then turned to Domatarious and said, "Do the others sense these feelings as I do?"

  "They can Eve, but when they become busy with the things of living, they ignore these feelings. When that happens, they miss the help the feelings provide. You are feeling this loneliness and it is there for you to understand so you will be able to handle whatever comes to you."

  "While I do not understand all you say Domatarious, I have learned to trust that I will understand when I need to. I told Sun I was talking to you and she wants you to come and see her. She said it has been a long time since you have been with her."

  Dom smiled and placed his arm around Eve. "Oh, I am always with her, but she is not always aware of my presence. Adam and Sun are doing all they need for their journey and do not need to see me. I am happy that I can be with you."

  Eve turned and put her arms around Domatarious and looked into his eyes. "I have been with you before Domatarious. I don't understand when, but I have known and been with you before I was here."

  "Yes Eve, you have been, and you may remember someday all the times we have shared together. In the meantime, enjoy the journey you are on, for it is good."

  Eve hugged him, stood, and headed back down the trail toward home. "We have been together longer than I can remember," Domatarious said quietly to himself and then disappeared from the mountainside.

  As the sun set behind the mountains, everyone began to head home. The noise around the fire grew with the arrival of each person, and soon the home filled with laughter and joy as the family shared their meal together. Wind was feeding the babies from her breast as Sun and Eve passed out food to everyone. Wind and Sun had delivered about the same time, so they were able to share in the feeding of each other's babies. Adam and Star had taken the sharp stones to the lake and both of them now had much shorter head hair. Adam had cleaned off much of his face hair and everyone had great joy in feeling the new bare places on his face.

  Adam, Star, and River added more trees to the shelter and now they had more places to rest in at night and during rain. Wellna found a female friend and they now had four little Wellnas who also romped and played with the children around the shelter.

  After they all ate, they sat around the fire and looked at the stars above. Eve and Sun made up stories about how the stars got there and they told about the people and animals that lived up in the sky. Soon the babies fell asleep and one by one, each little one found their sleeping place and quietly fell asleep.

  Adam had taken the insides out of a log and when he hit it with sticks, it made a fun sound. As he played on the log, Wind and Sun moved around the fire, their feet coming down with the sounds Adam made on the log. He put the log aside and started to clap his hands together the same as he had with the log. Wind and Star did the same with their hands and Adam joined them in moving his feet around the fire. He turned around and stepped hard on Wind’s foot and she let out a yelp. They all stopped and looked at her until she laughed and kicked Adam playfully. He reached out, grabbed her, and pulled her close so she could not kick again and they all laughed hard as she struggled to break loose. At last, Adam kissed her and let her go.

  With a loud scream, a figure jumped out of the darkness and pushed hard against Wind. She stumbled back, lost her balance, and fell into Sun, knocking her against the big rock at the edge of the shelter. As Adam turned to see what was going on, a brown streak flashed by him and jumped on the being that had pushed Wind. Adam saw that Wellna had the being by the Arm and had knocked it to the ground and was attacking it fiercely. Suddenly, Wind jumped to her feet and screamed "Adam!" He turned to look at her but saw she was looking at the figure on the ground and not at him.

  "Wellna, come back!" Adam hollered at Wellna. Obediently, Wellna let the being go and stepped back to Adam, but never took his eyes off the intruder. Wind rushed forward to the being, and said, "Adam, what are you doing?"

  "You are mine, Wind. Why are you with this one?" the intruder shouted at her.

  Adam looked at Wind and the intruder and began to understand that this was Wind's Adam. The male looked up at Adam and glared at him with eyes of fire. Adam felt the strange feeling coming from the male, and tensed as he did when confronting a wild animal. Wind suddenly turned and said, "Sun, are you hurt?"

  Adam looked toward Sun and saw that she was lying on the ground and not moving. He rushed to her side and grabbed her hand. Sun did not grab back, but lay on the ground as though she was asleep. "Sun, wake up." Adam shouted at her, but she made no move or reply. Then Adam saw the blood behind her head, and lifted her up and looked at the cut that was pouring blood all over her hair and down her back. "Wind, Sun is hurt and will not wake up," he cried out. Wind came to Sun's side and saw that she was very still. She looked at the cut in her head, but saw that it was no longer bleeding. Leaning over she put her head on Sun's chest and held it there for a minute. "No," she cried, "Sun, no. Come to us Sun. Come to us." She then buried her head in Sun’s neck and began to cry in a deep and painful voice.

  Adam looked at Wind and suddenly began to understand Sun was asleep and would not wake up again. He grabbed Sun, pulled her close to him, and started to rock her in his arms. With tears running down his face he kept repeating, "I love you, I love you."

  Wind turned toward the intruder, pointed a finger at him, and screamed. "You, leave here. Leave here now." The force of her voice woke Eve and she came to the opening of the shelter and saw the wounded male crouching on the ground with Wind telling him to leave. She saw Sun on the ground in Adam’s arms and felt his pain as he cried and rocked her. She turned to the new male, looked into his eyes, and suddenly felt emptiness in her so deep she could not breathe. It was the feeling she had experienced the last few day, but more intense. It was the feeling of loneliness. She watched as the wounded male stood and walked into the forest.

  She turned back to Adam and knelt down next to him. Placing her hands on Sun, she felt the absence of life that she felt on the dead sheep she had seen. She placed her hands on Adam and felt the pain in his heart. With every part of
her inner strength, she loved him and poured comfort into his brokenness. He sensed her and looked over to see who was there. Reaching out with both of her hands, she took his head in her hands and kissed his forehead. "I love you Adam, and I give you all the love I feel for Sun."

  Adam pulled Sun closer and through tears, looked at Eve, reached out, and touched her face. A peace came over him, and he looked over to Wind who was crouched in the corner. As he opened his arms to her, she rushed to him and held him tight. Together they held Sun, and cried out their pain.

  Eve walked to the edge of the clearing and into the forest. "Sun is gone Domatarious," she said aloud. She felt his hand on her shoulder and a flood of peace filled her inner being.

  "Yes, Eve, her journey has ended and she is not here anymore."

  "I will miss her greatly," said Eve, "but I know where she has gone, and it is good."

  "Where do you know she has gone, Eve?" Domatarious asked her.

  She turned to him and said, "She has gone to Eternity and it is a beautiful place. I remember being there and it is more beautiful than anything I have ever seen. I remember the light being beautiful and full, but no sun was there for the light. The light came from everything and not from any special place. I remember others there also and how we loved being in this place." Looking at Domatarious, she said, "And I remember being there with you. I am from there and I know now that is where I live. I am here on Earth, but I am only here because I wanted to be. I am here to do the things of the God of All Good Things. Sun is from there, and has now returned. I know these things, Domatarious, but I do not know how I know them."

  "You have been given a gift of remembering your journeys before you came here Eve. It is a gift that will give you great understanding and you will help others to know how good life is and how much they are all loved."

  She looked back at the home and saw Adam and Wind sitting on the ground still holding Sun's body. "I must go to the other male," she said.

  "Why do you think you have to do that Eve?" Domatarious asked.

  Looking up at him, she said quietly, "Because, he is Adam. I am Adam. All of us are Adam and we must be one together. He is hurt and lonely and I will go to him, for he is one with me." She turned and went into the forest to find the new Adam.

  "You are Eve to those who know you here," Dom said quietly as he watched her disappear. "But you are my Satari and I love you and I celebrate your journey."

  Enough moonlight filled the night to see the path, but even without it, she felt his presence. He was in physical pain, but the pains she felt went much deeper. She wondered what things he had been through to cause this much pain and hurt inside. Coming to the clearing by the lake, she saw him sitting near the water holding his arm to his side. "Adam, are you hurt badly?" she asked as she approached him.

  He jumped to his feet and turned toward her. "Do not come near me." He snarled at her and stepped away.

  "I am Adam also, and I am called Eve," she responded as she continued to walk toward him. He was somewhat larger than her Adam and his head hair and face hair were long and matted. He seemed much darker than Adam, but the moonlight was dim and caused the shadows to play tricks with her eyes. He did not move as she came near, but continued to look at her and tense in his body. "Let me see your arm Adam."

  He looked at her and seeing she was but a small girl, relaxed somewhat and held out his arm. The forearm was a mass of small bite marks, but the upper arm was torn open and, even in the small light of the moon, Eve saw it was sliced open deeply. She reached out, took his good arm, and led him into the lake, where she had him sit until the wounded arm was submerged. She held it there for a time and then lifted it from the water and placed her lips on the deep cut. She felt the healing flow through her and into the wound, just as Sun had taught her to do. She ran her lips down his arm to the smaller hurts and finally placed the arm back into the water. All the time she did this, Adam never took his eyes off her.

  "What are you doing to me?" he asked her quietly.

  "Sun taught me this," she replied, "I see the hurt, then I call upon a deep love for you and let it flow through me. Look at your arm now Adam and you will see that the love I give you brought healing to your pain."

  Adam pulled his arm from the water and saw the deep cut had now closed and only a long red mark remained. The smaller cuts were but dots on his arm. "Who are you that you do such things?"

  She smiled at him and he saw her gentle face in the moonlight as she spoke, "I am Adam, and I am known as Eve. I am the child of Adam and Sun, and this is where we live."

  "Why didn't you do this to the female who was hurt back by the fire?" he asked.

  "Her life was gone, and nothing I could do would help. She has gone to the great healing and we cannot bring her back from there," Eve replied as took his hand and led him out of the water, back to the grass on the shore. "Why did you act as you did Adam, for it caused great pain to all of us?"

  "The male was with my Wind and he cannot take her from me."

  "Why do you think Wind belongs to you?" she asked.

  "We are one from the beginning and she is for me and not for him."

  Eve looked at him for a minute and felt the feeling of loneliness that had been part of her for sometime. It was his pain she felt, and she had a better understanding of what he was thinking. "You have been apart from Wind for a long time and yet you have continued to search for her. I do not think you would search for a lost animal that long, so I think it is because you love her and miss her that you go far from your home to find her. How can you think she belongs to you and yet still love her?"

  "I do not know this love thing you talk of, for I only want Wind to be back with me. I have looked for her so I could bring her back."

  "Why did she go Adam?"

  "I don't know, she is like the wind, so I call her Wind."

  "She left you because you look at her as you look at other things you call your own. She is an Adam, as you and me. No other Adam owns her. You feel love for her because she is different from the other things around you and you want to be with her and have joy. However, because you feel this, you have to let her be who she is, and not force her to be what you want. That is love Adam, and it is a great gift."

  "Does this new Adam she is with love her?"

  "Yes he does, and he loved Sun, who was with him as Wind was with you. He gives to Wind and allows her to be who she is and she loves him because of this. Because of you trying to take Wind back, Adam has now lost his Sun. I think when we act in ways that do not show love, only hurt will come to us. Now we have much hurt at home, and you are still without Wind."

  "Now he has Wind and I have nothing. This is love?"

  "I know this is love when I am able to be with you and you do not cause me harm. I know this is love when the healing flows to your arm and makes it well." She reached up and touched his face. "I know this is love because I feel your loneliness is less than it has been for sometime, and you cannot leave us, or the loneliness will destroy you. You must stay with us and learn to love, for you are Adam, and this is your strength."

  "How do you know all these things for one so small?"

  "I have a great teacher who explains things to me and I seem to know things that I did not learn here. I don’t understand how all this comes to be, but I know you are hurt inside more than you are hurt in your arm. As love healed your arm, it will heal your inside too. I must go back home to help with the pain there. Go up the hill, for there is a clearing where you may rest. I will come for you and bring you home and you will not be alone anymore."

  "I will not go back and see Wind with him and not be with her."

  "That is your choice Adam, but think about leaving and never being with anyone again. It would not be a good thing for you to do, but I cannot force you to stay. It is your journey."

  She rose and walked back to the path in the forest. He watched her go and looked down at his arm. The cut was almost gone, and he felt no pain at all. He tho
ught of Wind and her being with this other Adam and felt the tightness in his belly. How could she do this to him? He could not allow this. Then he thought of this gentle girl with her thoughts of love. She knew him as if she had been with him forever. She brought a feeling to him he felt when Wind had been with him. That feeling made him relax and he slowly stood to his feet and headed toward the clearing Eve had suggested. "I will try this love, but I am still Adam and she is my Wind."

  Eve came into the clearing and saw Adam and Wind were still sitting next to Sun. Neither spoke as she came near and she felt the hurt they were feeling.

  Wind looked up as she approached and said, "Where have you been Eve, I looked for you, but could not find you."

  "I have been with the other Adam."

  As she said this, Adam looked up at her and she felt a feeling she had never received from Adam. He jumped to his feet, grabbed her, and shouted, "Where is he, show me for I must find him?"

  Eve looked into Adam's eyes and gently took his hands off her shoulders and held them to her lips. "Adam would Sun want you to cause more pain?" she asked softly. She opened his hands, put them around her face, and continued to look into his eyes. "He is Adam, as we all are Adam, and Sun would want us to love him as we love each other." She let go of his hands, walked over to Sun, and knelt before her lifeless body. Sadness filled her as she realized she would no longer hear Sun's laughter and feel her love of life. Nevertheless, a greater joy filled her, as she knew that Sun was now in a place of beauty she had never seen before. Eve smiled as she pictured Sun touching all the beauty and feeling good in her new home.

  "Why do you smile Eve?" Wind asked.

  "I know where Sun has gone and I know how happy she is with all she is seeing. I am sad she is not here, but I am happy for where she is now."

  "How do you know these things Eve?" Adam asked.

  "I have been there," she replied. "I do not know when, but I know I have been there and it is where we will all go when our journey here is through." Looking at Adam she continued, "Domatarious has spoken of these things to you long ago, and you must try to remember his words so your pain for Sun will be less."

  "How is the other Adam, Eve, is he hurt?" Wind asked

  "I have allowed the healing to flow through me and his arm is well now. However, the hurt he feels inside will take time to heal. I told him to rest in the upper clearing until I return to him, but I do not know if he will do this." Sitting next to Wind, she said to her, "He is very much alone and this causes him to act in ways that are not good for him or those around him. He loves you Wind, but thinks you must be his for him to be well. I have talked to him about this, but his need is great and my words are small. I will go to him and bring him here, but it is up to you and Adam how he will heal from his pain. I do not know how you will do this, but I know you both can stop his pain, if you choose to do this."

  Turning to Adam she said, "You and Wind must wake the children and explain that Sun is gone. We will prepare Sun for a celebration of her new life, for our sorrow may be great, but knowing she is well and happy will make us lighter. Carry Sun to the lake and I will wash her in the water. Send Star to the lake and he will help me prepare what we must do next."

  Adam looked at her for a long time and said, "You talk to us like we are the children and you the older. You do not seem as the Eve we have known. What has happened to you?"

  "There are things I see and understand that I have not seen before. When Sun was no more, it is as if the clouds went from my mind and things became clear. I only want to make your pain less Adam, for I have great love for you and know that the feeling you now give me is not one that will work well for you. You and Sun brought life into the Earth we live in, because you loved each other and wanted to bring more love. Now you feel this anger and it is strange to you and to me. I know it is because you are in pain, but it must not stay as part of you, or all you and Sun ever wanted will go away. You are Adam, and I am Adam, feel my love and Wind’s love and know that we will always be with you, even as Sun is always with you inside." She slid next to him, put her arms around his neck, and felt his arms go around her and hold her. He began to cry, and in his release, she felt the anger become less. "I loved Sun very much," he sobbed as he held her, "and that love gave us you. I feel her inside me making me whole from my pain." He pulled back, looked into her eyes and smiled. "I see her eyes in you and that feels good. I will carry her to the lake and you do what is right in your thinking. We will feel our sorrow, but we will also celebrate Sun's new life. Go to the new Adam and bring him to us, for Sun would want all the Adams to celebrate her life together. Wind and I will talk and find what we are to do, but know that your words, wherever you found them, are healing to our wounds." He held her again and she felt his love grow strong. "Thank you Adam," she whispered to him, "for being strong."