Times Like These

by Ana McKenzie

  ‘I get it,’ Merren said. ‘But don’t, okay?’

  Lucy straightened and smoothed her dress. ‘Sorry Merren. Can’t make any promises. Too many interesting angles.’ She opened the bathroom door and laughed. ‘Assistant, huh? That’s what they call it these days?’

  She was gone before Merren could make any reply, let alone think of a snappy comeback. This was bad, was all she could think as she dried her hands, took a breath, and stepped back out into the crowd.

  Bianca gave her a grateful smile when she reappeared at her side.

  ‘Everything all right?’ Merren whispered.

  To her relief, Bianca nodded. ‘It’s going well, I think. I feel terribly exposed, and I’m in desperate need of a drink, but I’m holding my own, I think. People aren’t treating me too much like I’m some sort of freak – the artist who can’t see.’

  ‘Of course you’re not some sort of freak,’ Merren said, shocked. ‘Is that how you see yourself?’

  Bianca shrugged, shook her head. ‘No. Yes. I don’t know. This had to be done, though. I had to come out here tonight and face it all. If I want to keep painting, that is.’

  ‘And you do.’

  She nodded. ‘And I do, of course.’ She turned to Merren, smiling. ‘And I can; I have to keep reminding myself of that. I can.’

  ‘Yes,’ Merren said. ‘You sure can. Those paintings you’ve been doing are extraordinary. They really are.’

  Bianca was nodding, her face radiant, when the Mayor walked up.

  ‘Merren!’ she said. ‘How pleasant to see you here – I didn’t realise you were also a patron of the arts. Or perhaps your partner here is?’ Alarmingly, Meredith Todd turned smiling to Bianca.

  ‘Meredith,’ Merren found herself saying. ‘This is Bianca Graves; she’s an artist.’ She touched Bianca on the elbow. Bianca, we’re talking to the Mayor, Meredith Todd.’

  ‘Oh my goodness,’ the Mayor said. ‘I know who Bianca Graves is! I’ve admired your work here in the gallery many times.’

  Bianca gave an awkward, confused smile. ‘Thank you,’ she said. ‘You are a friend of Merren’s?’

  Meredith laughed. ‘Well, it would be nice to think so, considering Merren’s bright future, but really I think it would be more appropriate to say we’re colleagues.’ She turned to Merren. ‘Wouldn’t you say, Merren? After this year?’

  ‘That is extremely generous of you, Meredith,’ Merren said, knowing the cat was well and truly out of the bag now and it was far too late to stuff that sharp-needled feline back in. ‘It’s been an honour to work so closely with you for the last eight or nine months.’

  The mayor laughed. ‘Pish posh,’ she said. ‘Enough of the honour. If we’re going to talk about that, then it should be mine, to be able to access your extraordinarily bright mind.’

  Merren was trying not to see Bianca turning her face this way and that between them, confusion written large on her features. She was only glad Macy was currently somewhere else.

  ‘Merren works with you?’ Bianca asked at last.

  ‘Oh yes. Merren is spear-heading our initiative to bring Dunedin well and truly into the twenty-first century. Drag this gorgeous old city kicking and screaming, if need be. She’s determined to have us with an all-free, all-autonomous electric public transport system by 2030.’ The Mayor patted Merren on the arm. ‘I’ve no doubt she will achieve it too. She’s quite the visionary when it comes to fusing social and technological ideals.’

  Bianca turned to face Merren. ‘I had no idea,’ she said. ‘What else do you get up to?’

  Both Merren and the Mayor laughed, although Merren’s was from nervousness.

  ‘I’ll leave Merren to tell you all about her successes,’ Meredith said. ‘I’m afraid I must mingle.’ She leaned toward Bianca. ‘I would love to talk with you about art sometime, and where we as a city can be more focused on such. Perhaps we can meet for a proper chat some time. Merren has my number; I’d be very pleased to hear your opinions.’

  A moment later, she’d swanned off, then just as quickly, she turned around and came back.

  ‘Oh,’ she said. ‘Merren, make sure you tell your date about the White Paper you’re delivering to parliament next year on blockchain security for voting and such things.’ She smiled and looked confidentially at Bianca. ‘Merren is too modest for her own good. She wouldn’t tell anyone about anything she does, if she had her way. Thinks it’s bragging, or something silly.’ Straightening again, Meredith grinned. ‘You make a gorgeous couple, by the way. I’m so pleased I got to meet you, Bianca. And now, I’ve really got to go.

  Bianca turned towards Merren, who wanted to melt away in the crowd for a moment too.

  ‘I can explain,’ she said.

  ‘You can?’ Bianca asked. ‘You can explain that bizarre conversation we just had with the Mayor of Dunedin?’

  Merren swallowed. ‘Well, yes,’ she said. ‘I guess I can.’

  ‘You’ve been working with the Mayor’s office. You’re designing the future of the city? You’re presenting something – god know’s what – to parliament next year? She said parliament, didn’t she? I wasn’t hearing things?’

  Merren didn’t know what to say, so she blurted the first thing that appeared on the tip of her tongue.

  ‘Yes,’ she winced. ‘And I made a lot of money on the crypto-currency market when I was younger too. And then I invested it in a few things and made even more.’ She tried to stand there and smile at Bianca, but it sat beseechingly on her face. She shook her head, touched a hand to Bianca’s arm.

  ‘I’m really sorry you’re finding all this out like this – it certainly wasn’t what I’d planned.’

  Bianca was staring disbelievingly at her. ‘What the hell were you planning then? Announcing it on the 6 o’clock news? Over the radio? Getting the Prime Minister to write me a personal note on your behalf?’ She shook her head. ‘I just don’t believe this, Merren. You’ve made a complete fool of me.’ She hugged herself, drawn and upset, holding herself the same way she had the first day Merren had met her.

  ‘I’m sorry,’ Merren said. ‘I tried to tell you – I spent all day trying to get hold of you, but you weren’t home.’

  ‘We’ve spent a lot of time practically in each other’s pockets,’ Bianca spat back at her. ‘You couldn’t think to tell me some of this at any stage during that time?’ She turned away, blinking. ‘No, you couldn’t. You had to let me think you were just a university student after a holiday job.’

  A cold stone dropped to the pit of Merren’s stomach, chill ripples spreading through her. ‘No,’ she said through numb lips. ‘Oh no – I never let you think anything of the sort.’ She shook her head from side to side, even though Bianca couldn’t see her. ‘You made that assumption all by yourself. I had no part of it.’

  ‘You didn’t disabuse me of it!’

  ‘I said plenty of things that should have made you think differently.’

  That made Bianca peer sideways at her, arms still wrapped protectively around herself. ‘No,’ she said. ‘You didn’t, or I wouldn’t still have been thinking so, would I?’

  Merren drew in a breath, trying to steady herself. She was all too aware that they were in a crowded room, and already curious glances were being thrown their way. She reached out for Bianca.

  ‘Let’s go talk about this somewhere more private, Bianca,’ she said.

  But Bianca was still shaking her head. ‘I don’t believe this. I just don’t believe this. The Mayor asked you who your date was. I have never been so embarrassed in my life.’ Merren saw her choke over the words, her slender neck bobbing.

  ‘That’s not entirely fair, Bianca,’ Merren said. ‘I’ve said a great deal about myself over the last couple weeks that you just didn’t care enough to hear. This situation isn’t just because I left things out.’

  Bianca swung around and grabbed Merren’s sleeve. ‘Of course it is,’ she said. ‘You told me nothing! I would have remembered this!’

 
; Merren hung onto her temper by a fraying thread. ‘Bianca,’ she said, her voice low. ‘You simply weren’t listening to me; that’s the problem. It wasn’t a problem until tonight, because I know how much you have going on right now, but I can’t let you think I’ve been holding things back from you. You could have listened, and you could have asked.’ She leaned back.

  Bianca stared at her in shock, then dropped her hand. ‘Can you find Macy, please. I want to go home.’ She blinked her grey eyes, stormy now. ‘Without you,’ she added.

  Merren stared at her for a long moment. ‘Fine,’ she said. ‘I’ll find Macy for you. Stay right here.’

  ‘No need to find me,’ Macy said out of the blue. ‘I’m right here, and quite the scene you two are making.’ She glared at Merren as though everything she’d thought about Merren had just been proved true. ‘Bianca,’ she said, still scowling at Merren. ‘I’ll be pleased to take you home. Everyone will understand, with your delicate condition.’ She bared her teeth in a snarl at Merren.

  ‘And if you’ve any respect for Bianca’s career, you will also leave.’

  Leaving wouldn’t be a problem. Merren had no desire to spend one more minute on the balcony of the art gallery, surrounded by people having a good time when she was so obviously no longer doing the same.

  ‘I’ll walk out right behind you,’ she said, her temper gone, only a blank tiredness in its place. ‘That way everything will look normal.’

  ‘There’s nothing normal about any of this,’ Bianca said, and Merren saw that her knuckles were white where she gripped her sides. It made something inside herself hurt, and she wanted to hold Bianca back, explain everything to her calmly, sensibly, tell her how she felt. How she really felt.

  But they had an audience. And Macy Joy was leading Bianca determinedly away, her back rigid. Merren found herself simply trailing along behind it.

  Her gran had been right, she thought ruefully. But how else should she have played it? It hadn’t been her intention to cause harm, or complicate things in any way. ‘In over your head, Merren,’ she muttered to herself, and then lifted her face, caught Lucy looking at her from the crowd. Lucy lifted her champagne glass in a salute and dropped a wink at Merren.

  Merren was almost glad she was leaving for the conference the next day, because she had a feeling she did not want to see tomorrow’s newspaper.

  And she especially did not want to see Bianca learning about it.

  Not that there was any chance of that, she realised, as Macy hustled Bianca into the limousine, and shut the door pointedly in Merren’s face.

  Chapter Thirty-Eight

  Bianca started shaking in the car, and she didn’t stop, even when the limousine pulled up her driveway and parked. Macy helped her out and led her to the front door, taking charge, digging the key out of Bianca’s purse and unlocking the house. She pushed it open and tugged Bianca over the threshold.

  ‘Well, I would call that an unmitigated disaster,’ Macy said, pulling Bianca into the dark house, forgetting she needed the lights on. ‘Except that we talked to the important people before the gala even began and that young up-start was behaving herself then, at least.’ She gave a disgusted sniff.

  ‘I want to go to bed,’ Bianca said. She couldn’t stop shaking; her whole body felt thin and fragile. She thought if she had even one more shock, she’d shatter like glass.

  ‘Good plan. Look, you’re shaking like a leaf. I’ll never forgive that girl. I knew she was trouble from the moment I clapped eyes on her.’

  ‘She’s been marvellous to me,’ Bianca managed through chattering teeth. ‘I don’t know why she did that tonight.’

  ‘Because she wanted to hog the limelight,’ Macy said with a grunt, closing the door and snatching up Bianca’s arm, leading her up the stairs. ‘She wanted some of your glory. It’s not everyone who gets to spend their time with someone of your serious talent, Bianca.’

  But there was something wrong with that, Bianca thought as she let Macy lead her to her bedroom and plant her at the end of the bed.

  ‘Shoes,’ Macy said, bending down to tap at Bianca’s left foot. She lifted her leg, and Macy tugged the boot from her foot. ‘Other one.’ Bianca lifted her other leg and Macy took that one off too.

  ‘Stand up, there’s a good girl. We’ll get you into bed,’ Macy said, ‘and you can have a big sleep, and in the morning, we’ll assess the damage and decide what to do. You’re not the first and you won’t be the last woman to fall for someone with their own underhanded agenda.’ She waited while Bianca undressed. ‘Where are your jammies? In the drawer?’ She didn’t wait for an answer but rummaged in amongst Bianca’s underwear. ‘Look, this will do,’ she said, putting an oversized tee shirt in Bianca’s hands. ‘I’ll go make you a hot cup of tea. Or something stronger if you’d like. I could do with something stronger after the night we’ve had. I’ll be sleeping here tonight, I think. You’re in no state to be left on your own.’

  She waited for Bianca to climb under the blankets, then grunted with what sounded like satisfaction.

  ‘I shouldn’t like to keep you from your family,’ Bianca said. She pulled the covers up, wanting to be left alone.

  ‘You’re not,’ Macy replied. ‘There’s no one at home anymore. Robert left for university at the beginning of the year – he’s living in Auckland, and Gary and I split back around August, it was.’ Bianca could almost hear the smile in her voice. ‘So I can stay as long as you need me. And it’s obvious you need me.’ Another sniff. ‘I’ll get you that cup of tea, my dear, and everything will be better in the morning. And don’t you worry a bit. You’re better off without that little gold-digger.’

  Bianca turned away from the sound of Macy’s footsteps leaving the room and going down the stairs.

  Despite the shock that had her still shivering, even between the covers, Bianca shook her head. Merren wasn’t a gold-digger. What had she said?

  ‘She made a lot of money,’ Bianca whispered to herself. ‘On some sort of market.’

  And the Mayor knew her. So did that journalist. Bianca pressed her face to the pillow. She guessed one question she’d had was answered, at least. Merren wasn’t spending time with her because of her success.

  It turned out Merren was successful in her own right.

  Exhausted, Bianca fell asleep before Macy returned with the cup of tea, and with that thought ratcheting around her head.

  There was light in her room when she woke and outside her windows birds warbled and sang without a care in the world. She rolled over onto her back and stared up at the hole her failing eyesight bored in the ceiling. Every inch of her body ached as though she’d spent the night running a marathon instead of sleeping there in her own bed.

  ‘Ah good, you’re awake.’ The voice shocked her into sitting. Macy loomed into the edge of her vision, a narrow, angular shadow. She blinked at the stick-like figure.

  ‘I’ve had another peek at your work in progress,’ Macy was saying, advancing on the bed. ‘I’m thinking we get a journalist to come do a feature article on you. Human-interest story, and all that. I bet the women’s magazines would be interested in you.’ She sat down on the bed beside Bianca and pressed a hot mug into Bianca’s hands. ‘Coffee, darling. You know what – that’s a brilliant idea. I’ll call the editor at the Women’s Weekly right away.’ A movement Bianca couldn’t interpret. ‘Well, when her office opens, if she works on a Saturday, which she is bound to. It’s early yet. But that just means I have time to pop home and get some things.’

  Bianca opened her mouth and spoke. ‘Get some things?’

  ‘I can’t just leave you here like this, can I?’ Macy said. ‘So, I’ll run home quickly and pack a few bits and pieces and come back. The bed in your spare room was very comfortable, I’ll be perfectly okay there until we get you back on your feet.’

  ‘Back on my feet?’ Bianca asked stupidly. Her head was still muzzy with sleep.

  ‘Of course.’ Macy stood and stretched, her joints crack
ing. ‘So many things to organise. I’ll need to find you a new model, obviously, so you can continue to work, and there’s all the publicity we need to arrange – might as well make as big a splash as we can, since this is the perfect opportunity to capitalise on your situation. Desire for your work is going to skyrocket!’ She stretched again and yawned. ‘That was the best night’s sleep I’ve had in months.’

  Bianca interrupted her. ‘My situation?’ she asked.

  ‘Definitely. Your blindness – it’s a great story.’

  Bianca was suddenly a whole lot more awake. ‘What do you mean it’s a great story? It’s not a story – it’s actually something that’s happening to me.’

  Macy laughed. ‘Well, we know that, of course. But it’s also something that folks are going to want to hear about. It will bring you a whole other level of interest from people. You’ll be a household name, rather than just an artist those in the know have heard of.’ Her voice was full of good cheer, and suddenly Bianca wanted to throw up.

  She pushed aside the covers and swung her legs out of bed, groping around to put the coffee down on the bedside table. Finding the surface, she lowered the cup carefully down, then turned with exaggerated care towards where Macy had been standing.

  ‘A household name?’ she asked.

  ‘Yes.’ There was an odd noise, and it took a moment for Bianca to realise that her agent was actually rubbing her hands together in glee. ‘You’ll be an example to the nation.’

  Bianca stood up. ‘I don’t know that I want to be an example to the nation,’ she said.

  ‘Of course you do – and don’t forget the more your name is out there, the more you’re worth, which is an iffy matter right now, because as good as I’m sure your new work will end up, at the moment it’s very decidedly a new direction for you, and not quite as accessible, I’d say. Brilliant, but especially at life-size it will be a much harder sell. Unless we can make everyone want it, and it’s your story that’s going to do that.’