by Tricia Lynne
Lily Costello is Under Construction. Caution: Hard Hat Area. The thought made me smile as I let my hand dance through the wind out of the driver’s window and sang along with Alabama Shakes to “Sound & Color” letting the words wrap around my ears. It was amazing how much energy it took, how much weight I carried because I wouldn’t let myself depend on anyone but me. I was tired of it. I was tired of shutting Brody down whenever he started to crack my shell.
After parking in a visitor’s spot, I headed for Brody’s apartment. It wasn’t until I was in the elevator that I remembered the voicemail and listened as I walked down his hall.
“Hey, Lily. I’m sorry for the way I acted earlier. I just... I’m worried about you.”
I knocked and Brody answered before the message was finished. Before he could say anything, I held my index finger to my lips.
“I care about you. A lot, Liliana. Okay, give me a call when you get this. Talk soon.”
Hitting save on the message, I slipped it into my purse. “I was listening to your message.”
He scratched his stubble. “Yeah. I’m sorry. I... The thought of someone hurting you. I didn’t handle that well.”
I cocked my head. “You care about me.” It wasn’t a question.
“I do.” Brody’s cheeks turned pink.
Warmth bloomed in my chest. When he held the door open wider in invitation, I walked in under his arm.
CC was lying on the couch. All four paws in the air, snoring like she had sleep apnea. It made me smile. Brody shut the door, and I could feel him behind me.
“Does she always sleep like that?”
“Like that. Or curled into a ball pushing against my ribcage.”
I grinned up at him, the butterflies returning. “She feels comfortable. Safe and protected. She’s at ease. Curling into your side means you’re hers. She’s bonded to you. I’m so glad, Brody. She depends on you. You’ve really put your heart into helping her find her way.”
“More like she stole my heart right out of my chest. You can depend on me, too, Liliana.”
His eyes held mine.
When I didn’t respond, he turned toward his kitchen, but not before I caught the disappointment. “Glass of wine?”
I followed him, my sandals tapping against the floor. That was the tricky part, wasn’t it? I wanted to depend on him. To trust that he would be there when I needed him. And I knew Brody would be there for the dogs. But being there for me... “Yeah, that would be great.”
He pulled an open bottle from the fridge, filling two glasses. “I’m glad you’re here, Lil, but what’s up? Something happen with the mill?”
As I slid on to a barstool at the kitchen island, he pushed a stemless glass in front of me. I felt myself wishing there was a stem to fiddle with. The man was all kinds of yummy.
Bare feet, loose shorts sitting low on his hips with the outline. The one that meant he was freeballing it. A threadbare UNT Football T-shirt stretched across his chest. Freshly trimmed scruff with the ends of his hair still damp.
And a heat radiating from him that I couldn’t ignore. But why else had I cleaned up? I liked the heat. That tug in my abdomen, and the ache that came with it. The fact that this man wanted me as much as I wanted him.
I couldn’t reconcile the Brody I knew with the one the media hounded. My Brody had a big heart in that big body. He’d been a man of his word and was smart and thoughtful. My Brody was a guy spending his Saturday night with a dog that had him wrapped around her little nubbin. That was my Brody—the one that mattered to me.
My Brody. Jesus.
“Actually, it’s me that owes you an apology.” Clearing my throat, I tracked his movement as he came around the counter to sit on the bar stool opposite me. “I know I’m not good at asking for help or letting people in. Anytime I’ve thought I could depend on someone, they’ve let me down. I’ve learned if I assume the worst of people, then I’m disappointed from the start, right?” I knew my smile wasn’t hiding my pain. “I know I have my baggage—leaning on someone, trusting them to be there, it’s like acknowledging I can’t do it all. But self-preservation tells me that I have to do it all because everyone else will let me down.” I pushed out a heavy breath.
“My dad took full advantage of the football lifestyle. Cheated on my mom, partied too hard, drank too much, and took too many pills. Hell, I am the product of my father knocking up a Bulldogs cheerleader.” I chuckled, but even I could hear the sarcasm. “Sometimes I wonder how many half siblings I have that I don’t know about. The fact that you play football makes it even harder for me to trust, but I’m trying. I promise I am.”
“What about your mom?” His voice held such concern.
“After my dad died, inside of six months, Audrey Costello dumped me at a boarding school with what little money we had left so she could find her next cash cow.”
The muscle in his jaw ticked. “Then she married the Dick Head—who treats everyone like shit on his shoes.”
“My mom included. Dick likes to hold money over her head. He thought he could do that to me, too. He even cut me off financially a while back because I wouldn’t let him manipulate me with money like he does my mother.” I sniffed. Do I tell him about Trey, too? That Dick cut me off financially when I refused to marry Dr. Chase? As much as I wanted to, I couldn’t. If Brody knew that the team’s head orthopedist had cheated on me then harassed me for years... I couldn’t taint the working relationship between them. “Dick has never warmed to me, never tried to be a father to me. I am simply my mother’s baggage, and I have no idea why. There was a time when I was younger that I wanted him to accept me, but he never did.”
He rolled his lips in as he wet the bottom lip with his tongue. “I’m so sorry Lil. I can’t imagine the pain you must have felt losing your dad, but not being able to count on your mom...”
“Anyhow.” I shrugged. “That’s why I don’t let myself depend on other people, and I guess... I’m afraid you’ll let me down, too. I don’t want that.”
I met his eyes for my next words. “Because I care about you, too.”
Elbow on the counter, Brody rubbed his thumb over his bottom lip as he listened without interrupting.
“I’m sorry I didn’t tell anyone about the note. I should have, I know that. But I was afraid you all might back out on me or try to talk me into slowing down. I didn’t realize how selfish it was until you pointed out I’m not the only one who could get hurt. I never want to put my friends in danger. I realize this is more than a friends vibe between us, but even if we were only friends, with nothing else between us, it would still break my heart if you were to turn out like everyone else. Understand?”
With a soft touch, he turned my face back to his. “Better than you think I do. When you’re in the limelight, everybody has a handout or a fucking agenda. Every screwup you’ve ever had follows you forever and gets dredged back up at every chance. The granddaughter thing... I didn’t know you knew about that, but it set off a chain reaction with the team. Hell, I half think they want to get rid of me.”
“Brody, you want me to trust you, but I can’t do that blindly at this point. I’m not built that way. Tell me your side. What happened with the granddaughter?”
He sighed, pinched the bridge of his nose. “I had no idea she was Barnett’s granddaughter. Ashlyn approached me in a bar after an away game we’d lost. I’d been drinking, I hadn’t been with anyone in close to a year. I just needed to blow off some steam, is all. I slept with her once. But she misled me on purpose. I thought she was older than she was. I didn’t know her last name, didn’t give her my number, but she’d planned out this grand life with me she told her granddad all about. We were going to have babies together and she was moving in with me. Honestly, I think the old man knew she was making shit up, but he had to save face, ya know? It’s stuff like that that makes me skeptical of everyone around me. The me
dia...” He shook his head. “Boring Brody doesn’t sell magazines the way manwhore Brody used to.” The muscle in his jaw twitched. “I shouldn’t have raised my voice, though. I’m sorry.”
“You don’t scare me, Brody Shaw.”
He blew out a frustrated breath. “That’s the problem, Liliana. You’re concerned for your friends, for your dogs, but not for yourself. You’re not invincible, damn it. Neither am I.” Brody cupped my jaw, pleading with me. “I care about you too damn much to watch you get yourself hurt because of all this.”
I pulled back, my own forehead furrowing. “I’m not walking away, Brody. Those dogs need us.”
“I’m not suggesting that. I can’t be complicit either. I want you to slow down, is all.”
He slid off his stool. Those warm chocolaty eyes penetrated my every cell. “Ease off until after camp is over, Lil. That’s all. We’ll make them think you took the threat seriously. Do the research, work on our next step, but leave the rest until I get back. That’s all I’m asking. Please.”
“When you get back, you’ll go straight into the season. You won’t have time for any of this!” I shoved back, got to my feet to put distance between us. I couldn’t think straight with him that close.
“I promise I’ll make time. We may have to do things at odd hours, shuffle stuff around, but I promise I will be there every step of the way. We’re a team, darlin’. I don’t leave my teammates’ asses hanging out in the wind. Especially when the ass is as nice as yours.” He grinned.
I’ll never know unless I try. “I’m counting on you, Shaw. Don’t let me down.”
“I won’t,” he said in earnest.
My mouth kicked up. “Okay. Me and my ass will wait until you get back.”
“Thank fuck,” he whispered as he closed in on me with that big body. When his scent teased my nose, what had been kindling when I walked in lit on fire.
“Brody...” It wasn’t a prelude to my dissent. It was a yearning I wouldn’t deny.
He cares about me.
Brody Shaw had wormed his way into my heart despite my best efforts. This man would leave me devastated; I was sure. Pulse kicking up, my breath escaped in a rush.
Brody reached for my waist, stopping short as he balled his hands into fists.
“If you want me to stop, tell me now, Liliana. Because I give zero fucks about anyone or anything outside this room at the moment. I only want to bury myself in you.”
The only time I’d enjoyed being called Liliana was when it rolled off Brody’s lips. Lips I wanted against my own. Along my neck. Lower. “Don’t stop.”
“Be sure.”
I rested a hand against his chest, slid it to his sternum. “I want you, Brody. Only you.” I let my hand drift lower, over his abs and belly button until I felt the rim of his shorts. “If you’re not going to fight it anymore, I’m not either.” Leaning up, I feathered a kiss along his jaw, down to his Adam’s apple.
“Shit,” he whispered. Pushing his hand into the hair at my nape, he angled my head. Brody’s mouth brushed mine, once, twice. A whisper of feathers against my skin.
I let out a breathy sigh when he captured my bottom lip and scraped his teeth over the sensitive flesh.
Our mouths were an endless slide of velvet tangling together, and the kiss got more desperate, more primal. Deeper. My hands gripped his hair. Fisting his shirt. Marking his biceps and dragging along his ribs. When I dipped the tip of my tongue into the indent at the base of his throat, that purely male sound of his vibrated against my lips.
Brody’s palms circled my waist before dipping down over my cheeks. Gripping. Kneading. Pushing them together before pulling them apart in a feeling that I can only describe as naughty as hell. “Fuck, Lily. This ass...”
Grinning against his mouth, I slid my hands under his shirt. His abs tensed as I ran my fingers through the delineations.
Brody’s hips jerked, his erection rubbing against my stomach.
Heat ran through my veins as my body ran slick. The need in my core was both pleasure and pain.
I ached for this man. Above me. Beneath me. Inside me. His scent, his salty-sweet skin against my tongue. The slope and curve of his muscles.
Tracing the vein in his biceps with my tongue, I let out a husky chuckle as he pulled my A-line skirt up with his fingertips only to grip my butt tight in his hands, lifting me off my feet.
I wrapped my legs around him. Locked my ankles over his butt. That crazy hot football ass I couldn’t wait to see. A squeeze of my thighs and I was rubbing my center against him like a cat in heat.
Brody hissed, and I dropped my head back only to have him drag his mouth up my neck. “Jesus. I want you inside me.”
His smile was naughty as hell. “When you see it, you might change your mind.”
“Mmm, you poor man.” I ran a finger over his scruff. “See, women like me—with all our soft spots—we were custom designed for...bigger things.”
“I can’t tell you how often I’ve thought about how your thighs will cradle my hips. The way your ass will shake when I take you from behind.” When he lowered me to the floor, he made sure my body stayed pressed against his. “The color changes in your eyes as I look up at you from right...here.” He ran a finger over my damp panties and my hips surged forward.
Christ, this man.
“As often as I’ve thought about straddling you. About the sounds you’d make when you came for me. Will you stretch me far enough that I’ll feel it when you come, Brody?”
Eyelids rolled shut, he tipped his face to the ceiling. “Jesus, fuck. I wanna do this slow. I wanna explore, savor you, but—”
“Next time.” I sat on the bed, tugging his shorts down. “This time is about need.” Letting my eyes drift down, I checked out what Brody brought to the table.
“Christ on a cracker. That is an immense...”
“Dong?” He chuckled.
The man was thick, long and rock hard. The shaft was granite covered in silk, his veins high under the skin. The ruddy head, with its pronounced crown, had a bead of moisture pearled at the tip, and trimmed thatch of black hair surrounded the base. God, I couldn’t help rubbing my legs together. Feeling the slide of my wet skin as I thought about him pushing into me.
I wondered what he tasted like. His cock was at the right level. I could swipe the liquid from the tip or cradle my tongue underneath, tickle the vein on the underside to see if he squirmed. Would Brody be salty or sweet? Both?
He must have seen my thoughts churning.
“Uh-uh.” Stepping back, he tugged his T-shirt off and stepped out of the shorts. “Next time. Down and dirty, remember?” Wrapped a hand around his shaft, he ran his palm root to tip.
God, I’d never seen anything so sexy in my life as this man stroking himself while he watched me with fire in his eyes.
“You want to be fucked, Lily?” Grabbing a foil packet from the nightstand drawer, he threw it on the bed.
I whipped my shirt off. “Yes.”
Brody moved forward until he was right in front of me. Hands on my ribs, he guided me up the bed. “Please, let that be a front clasp.”
“It’s your lucky day, Shaw.”
In a matter of seconds, he was pushing my skirt up around my waist. My sandals—well, I wasn’t exactly sure when they came off. “Give me a second, I’ll take the skirt off.”
“No, leave it. It’s like opening a present.” His grin was all kinds of mischievous, but his calloused fingers were at my hips, tugging my underwear past my knees. His warm brown gaze fixed on my center, making me squirm.
He brushed a single finger over my slit. “Goddamn you’re pretty, Liliana. You ready for me, darlin’?”
“See for yourself.”
“I intend to.” When a thick finger dipped inside me, a gasp escaped my throat. I arched off the bed, chased his hand
as he pushed in and out of me.
“Fuck, Lily. So damn wet.”
“I guess I’m ready,” I gritted. I ripped open the condom, holding it up to him. Instead of taking it, Brody slid forward until his knees were under mine and his shaft bobbed over my center. “Put it on me.”
Sitting up, I pinched the tip and rolled it up his length.
“Shit.” Brody’s hips arched forward. “I like your hands on me,” he hissed through his teeth. Sliding his fingers into my hair, he took my mouth in a deep, penetrating kiss that left me with heavy lids and flushed skin. The ache in my lower belly turning painful. Guiding him to my entrance, I rubbed the crown through my soaked folds, over my engorged bud before positioning the tip where I wanted it most.
Popping the clasp on my bra, Brody palmed my breast, rolled my nipple with his thumb and forefinger as he put pressure on my opening.
This man would be the death of me. “Brody...”
“Yeah, I’m with you.” Strong arms reached under my knees and cradled my legs in the bend of his arm.
With entirely too much caution, Brody sank the tip into me.
I’m fairly sure my eyes rolled back in my head. The sting of the stretch, the bliss of the pressure—a throaty moan tumbled from my throat. “More. All of it.”
“Lily, shit. So tight.” Irises turned the color of coffee, Brody’s neck and shoulders corded with power.
I ran my hand over him, all that strength he held in check. “Brody, I want you to fill me up. Let me watch your body disappear inside mine.”
“Not yet.” Letting one of my legs go, the wicked man put a thumb against my swollen nub. He circled around it, inching into me, rocking his hips in short, quick strokes. “Jesus.”
“You gonna come for me, Liliana? Already?” His lips quirked up on one side as he pushed in deeper, a little more sting and pleasure with each thrust.