Smoke & Mirrors

by Charlie Cochet

  was the same. He’d just never had anyone to tell him it was okay to smile. They were both too familiar with how short life could be, and there was no sense in not enjoying the journey while they could.

  Sparks gave Sloane two days off. It was the least she could do for the whole Wolf debacle. Despite her assurances that Wolf was no longer in the country, that didn’t mean someone else wouldn’t be sent in his place. Dex and Sloane went about their day but made sure not to let their guards down. After coffee, Dex spoke to his little brother, insisting he was fine. Talk of Dex and Sloane having sexy times had quickly turned Cael’s fretful ramblings to gagging noises and sounds of disgust before he told Dex he was a jerkface. In true Cael fashion, it was quickly followed by an apology and insistence that Dex was not, in fact, a jerkface. Dex promised to call Cael if he needed anything and asked him to annoy Ash on his behalf, or at least make an attempt.

  Less than an hour after their phone conversation, Cael was on Dex’s doorstep. Dex had opened the door, barely getting a word out before Cael launched himself at him.

  “Woah, hey.” Dex let out a soft laugh as he wrapped his arms around Cael. “It’s okay, Chirpy.”

  “Don’t call me that,” Cael replied, his words muffled against Dex’s shirt. He squeezed Dex gently, and held on to him.

  Dex couldn’t remember the last time Cael had clung to him like this. He closed his eyes and let his head rest against Cael’s. He didn’t pull away or comment. It was clear Cael had been shaken up by what happened. Once he pulled back, he wiped at his eyes with his sleeve, and gave a sniff, a deep frown on his face. He refused to look Dex in the eye. Who knew what was going on in that overactive brain of his.

  Dex put his hands on Cael’s shoulders, demanding softly, “Hey, look at me.”

  With some reluctance, Cael did. His big gray eyes were glassy.

  “I’m sorry I scared you.”

  Cael nodded.

  “How about a drink?” Dex motioned behind him, and Cael followed. They headed into the kitchen where Sloane was washing the dishes. He smiled at Cael.

  “Hey.”

  Cael gave him a wobbly smile before taking a seat on one of the chairs behind the counter.

  “So what’ll it be?” Dex asked, subtly squeezing Sloane’s side. Cael was quiet. Like Dex, Cael was never quiet. Not unless he was engrossed in a video game or movie. “Tea? Hot chocolate?”

  Cael sat up straight, seeming to shake himself out of it. “Hot chocolate. With marshmallows. Lots of marshmallows. Like, half the cup should be marshmallows.”

  Dex chuckled, relieved Cael was acting like himself again. He got to work fixing up Cael’s hot chocolate while Sloane made a latte for himself and Dex. Sloane knew him so well. Dex didn’t even have to ask.

  When Dex placed Cael’s hot chocolate in front of him, the tiny marshmallows forming a peak, and close to causing a tiny marshmallow avalanche, Cael frowned at it.

  “I can’t stick any more on there, buddy. Gravity’s got to do its thing.” Dex studied his brother. “Cael?”

  “I don’t know what to do with it.”

  Dex cocked his head to one side, smiling. “You eat the top part and drink the rest, silly.”

  “No, you jackass!”

  Cael’s outburst surprised the hell out of Dex and Sloane. The two of them stood speechless. Dex could see Cael was barely keeping it together. Usually he was easy to read, but right now he had no idea what was going on. Cael’s face was flushed, his eyes glassy, and he looked about ready to blow his top.

  “Cael, talk to me. Don’t know what to do with what?” Very gingerly, Dex made his way around the counter, stopping next to Cael.

  “With you almost dying,” Cael replied through his teeth. “With you being tortured.” His hands balled into fists on the countertop, his hard gaze on the peak of marshmallows. “I know you’ve been in tough spots before, but even then, I knew you’d be okay, because you always found a way to be okay, to get yourself out of trouble. This time….” He shook his head, his lips pressed into a thin line. When he turned to look at Dex, the fear in his eyes broke Dex’s heart. “I really thought this was it. I thought I’d lost my big brother for good.” Tears pooled in his eyes and Dex didn’t hesitate. He threw his arms around Cael and hugged him close, offering what comfort he could as Cael shed quiet tears.

  Sloane gave him a small smile before heading upstairs, leaving them alone to share this moment. Dex closed his eyes, trying hard not to let his emotions sweep him away. It was hard. Cael’s words reminded him of how close he had come to losing his life. What if he hadn’t freed himself? Okay, enough of that. With a sniff, Dex pulled back. He met his brother’s gaze.

  “You didn’t lose me, okay? I’m here. Whatever’s going on, we’ll get to the bottom of it, and I swear that I will do everything in my power to be here with you, with Dad, and Sloane, for as long as I can. I love you, Chirpy.”

  “I love you too, Dex.” Cael wiped his eyes before he narrowed them. “Tell me you kicked his ass.”

  Dex grinned wickedly. “I knocked him out with a metal chair.”

  “Good,” Cael said with a soft laugh. “Asshole. Hope someone sticks needles under his fingernails.”

  Dex instinctively dropped his gaze to his fingers. “Dad?”

  Cael let out a heavy sigh. “I don’t know how we’re supposed to keep him out of this, Dex. Sparks should know better. She’s been his partner at the THIRDS since he joined. Once he gets something in his head, he’s as stubborn as you. You should have seen how pissed off he was.”

  Dex’s head shot up. “He went over to yours?”

  “To Ash’s. I’ve been crashing there. Dad came over this morning, and just… he was so mad. He looked rough. He obviously hadn’t slept much, if at all.” Cael worried his bottom lip with his teeth. “He’s not going to stay on the sidelines for long, Dex.”

  “I know.” Dex eyed his brother. “Did you tell him anything?”

  Cael glowered at him. “No. I told him it had to come from you. It’s not like he expected me to. I think he just needed me to know that he was there, in his own way, and that he was looking out for us.” Cael plucked one of the marshmallows from the heap and popped it into his mouth. Dex couldn’t help but smile. He was so very lucky. He’d never forget that.

  The two of them made small talk while Cael ate his weight in marshmallows, and when he was done, after Dex had assured him for the hundredth time that he was okay, they hugged, and Cael left. Upstairs, Dex found Sloane on the bed propped up against a number of pillows as he read from his tablet. He looked up at Dex, his eyes filled with concern.

  “Everything okay?”

  Dex nodded. “Just hit him a little harder than expected.” Feeling the need for his partner’s warm strength, Dex climbed up on the bed and lay down beside Sloane, snuggling close. Sloane didn’t pry any deeper. He simply stroked Dex’s hair as he read, which was exactly what Dex needed at the moment. He closed his eyes, a weary sigh escaping him. He hadn’t realized how tired he was until now. Within seconds, he’d dozed off.

  “I CAN’T believe Sparks is making me stay home for a week. I’m fine.”

  Sloane patted Dex’s butt as he walked by on the way to the kitchen to finish washing up the breakfast dishes. “I know, sweetheart.”

  Sloane was humoring him. He’d been fussing over Dex since the morning after the incident, but Dex didn’t mind. If Sloane wanted to take care of him, Dex was going to soak it in and roll around in it like a cat with catnip. But tomorrow Sloane would have to return to work, and Dex would be left at home. Alone. With his thoughts.

  As expected, two days went by in the blink of an eye, even with Dex resting despite his protests that he was fine. Sloane was having none of it. He’d cook for Dex, they’d shower, fool around, watch TV, eat, fool around some more, shower, watch movies, eat, and go to bed, where they had some sexy times. Next thing Dex knew it was time to get up and for Sloane to get ready for work. He rolled onto his side to face hi
s sleepy, grumpy boyfriend.

  “I don’t want to go,” Sloane said with a pout.

  Dex smiled and rubbed circles over Sloane’s chest. “I know you don’t, but the city needs you. Your team needs you.”

  “They have Ash.”

  “How is that an argument against what I said?”

  Sloane chuckled. He rolled onto his side and propped himself on his elbow, using his free hand to caress Dex. It was like neither of them could go more than a few seconds without touching.

  “He’s been doing a great job.”

  It wasn’t the first time Ash had stepped in for Sloane. No one had ever complained about his leadership ability.

  “Has Ash ever wanted to lead a team?”

  Sloane shook his head. “He could if he wanted to. Sparks has been trying to give him his own team for years.”

  Dex was surprised by that. “Sparks wants him to be a Team Leader?” Not that Ash wasn’t experienced or skilled enough. If anything, he was overqualified for his position in Destructive Delta, but only because he preferred it that way. For all of Ash’s abrasiveness, he was smart, and more open to adapting to new situations than he was before. There was a time Dex believed Ash was too hotheaded to be a Team Leader, but Ash had changed since Dex had first met him. He’d mellowed out some, took more time assessing the reasons behind people’s actions rather than just reacting.

  “Believe it or not, the higher-ups agree. Every time a position comes up, Ash is the first one to get an offer, but he always turns them down. Occasionally he’ll fill in until the position is assigned permanently to someone, but he won’t leave Destructive Delta.” Sloane shrugged. “You know Ash. He’s never been big on change, at least none that he doesn’t initiate.”

  With a groan, Sloane got out of bed, providing Dex with a tantalizing show as he extended his beefy arms high over his head, the muscles in his back flexing and shifting under all that smooth skin as he stretched. The soft cotton of his loose pajama bottoms accentuated his firm, round ass. Dex had the urge to pounce, but knowing Sloane had to get ready for work, he behaved himself.

  Sloane used the bathroom and got dressed while Dex pulled on a T-shirt and made the bed. He went downstairs to brew more than the individual tankard of pre–morning coffee his fancy coffee machine had prepared for him earlier that morning. By the time he got back upstairs, Sloane was done with the bathroom. He kissed Dex sweetly on the lips on his way to the kitchen to make breakfast. It hadn’t taken them long to fall into a morning routine that worked perfectly for them.

  Thanks to Dex’s Waking Dead state in the mornings, he now set his smart alarm to wake him an hour before their regular alarm was set to go off. Dex would stumble downstairs half-asleep, his body on autopilot as he took his coffee mug—which he always left by the machine the night before, along with a spoon and small plastic Tupperware with the exact measurement of sugar he liked—and poured himself some nectar of the gods. He added all the sugar in the tiny container, mixed, and sipped enough to reach some level of brain functionality. Then he went back upstairs and climbed into bed next to Sloane. They snuggled, their alarm went off about half an hour later, and Dex was awake enough to enjoy Sloane’s sleepy morning smile.

  After putting on one of his faded Def Leppard T-shirts and a pair of donut-patterned socks, Dex went downstairs and sat at the kitchen counter as Sloane served up high-fiber english muffins piled high with scrambled egg whites, topped with melted low-fat shredded cheese and bacon bits. Dex’s steaming, frothy bucket of cappuccino beckoned.

  “Thanks for breakfast, babe.” Dex took a big sip of his coffee, sighing in contentment before chomping down on his english muffin. He’d been distrustful of the egg whites at first, but Sloane had ways of making them tasty.

  “Dex, you okay?”

  Dex realized he’d been staring down at his plate. “Shit, sorry. I must have zoned out there a second.”

  “Several seconds,” Sloane said, his amber eyes filled with worry. He placed his hand gently to the back of Dex’s neck, his thumb stroking his skin. “You okay?”

  “I’m good.” Dex smiled and leaned in to give Sloane a quick kiss. He finished his coffee and then got busy cleaning up. That was the deal. One cooked or prepared food; the other cleaned up. As soon as the dishwasher was loaded and programmed, Dex busied himself cleaning the kitchen. He gave a start when Sloane took hold of his elbow, turning Dex around, his brow furrowed.

  “Dex, you’re not good. What’s wrong?” Sloane brushed Dex’s hair away from his face. “And don’t say you’re good. You’re cleaning the kitchen.”

  “I like a clean kitchen,” Dex replied with a shrug.

  “Babe, you cleaned it twice yesterday.”

  Had he? Crap. He had. Dex let out a deep sigh. “I don’t want you to go, but I know you have to go. But I don’t want you to.” Man, he sounded like such a whiney whiner. Sloane didn’t seem to notice his pathetic pouting. He’d be fine. He was fine.

  “Should I call in?” Sloane put his fingers under Dex’s chin and tilted his face up so their eyes could meet. “If you need me to stay, I will.”

  “No.” Yes. Dex shook his head. “No, I’m fine. I’m being silly.” He just felt… weird.

  “Dex—”

  “Nope.” Dex smiled brightly and kissed Sloane’s lips before turning him and gently pushing him toward the front door. If he didn’t get Sloane out he’d never let him leave, and he couldn’t be that selfish. “You’re Team Leader. You need to go lead your team. Your city needs you.”

  Sloane turned and took hold of Dex’s hand. He put it to his lips for a kiss. “The city needs the THIRDS. It doesn’t need me. If you don’t feel safe or well, just say the word.”

  “I’ll be fine. I promise. The Tin Men are out there making sure the Wicked Witch doesn’t get me. I’m pretty sure Austen’s been hanging around too.”

  Sloane cocked his head to one side. “How do you know?”

  “Just a feeling. Also my Cheesy Doodles are missing.”

  Sloane sighed. “I warned him about that.”

  “Because he’s so good at listening,” Dex said, rolling his eyes. At least the guy had stopped peeping on them. Not so much because Sloane had told him not to for the billionth time, but because something—or someone—else seemed to have captured Austen’s full attention.

  After giving Sloane a thorough good-bye kiss, Dex stood in the doorway with a silly grin on his face as he watched Sloane get into the Impala. The passenger-side window slid down, and Sloane waved at him before pulling away from the curb.

  Dex closed the door behind him, then made sure it was locked. A deep sense of loss hit him out of the blue. He shivered and put a hand to the wall for support. What the hell? A wave of nausea almost knocked him over, and he ran to the kitchen, hurling when he reached the trash bin. When he was done, he grabbed the clean, wet dish towel hanging over the edge of the sink to wipe his mouth. He squeezed his eyes shut, willing his body to calm down. When he felt like he could move without puking, he rinsed his mouth out. Was it possible whatever Wolf gave him was still working its way out of his system? That had been days ago. TIN had assured him no traces of it remained.

  Dex turned, and his insides erupted in a fiery explosion of agonizing pain. It swept through his body like lightning strikes to his organs and muscles. His legs gave out from under him, and he hit the floor. His back arched violently, his muscles feeling like they were trying to burst out of his skin. His heartbeat soared, and Dex clenched his teeth. He wanted to cry out, but he couldn’t. Oh God, he was so scared. What was happening to him?

  “Quick, put him on the table.”

  Who the hell was that? Dex was in too much pain to figure it out. His vision was sharp yet dark at the edges. Hands took hold of him and lifted him, carried him and held him securely as his body twisted brutally. The pain came in waves, each one stronger than the last. He felt tears roll down his cheeks, but there was nothing he could do.

  “Don’t let him hit hi
s head,” someone else said. Seconds later, his head was carefully secured.

  “What’s happening?”

  “I don’t know. Boss said we needed to watch him. The tests were inconclusive. He’s not… normal.”

  Dex would have laughed if he could. Story of my life. Was he having a seizure? Surely he wouldn’t be aware if he was. At least he knew the people in his house were TIN operatives. For the first time, he was grateful for their vigilance.

  A light shone in one eye, then the other as he convulsed on the table. He was aware of hands on him, holding him down, on his arms, legs, torso, thighs, and ankles.

  “Make a note. His pupils are fully dilated.”

  “He’s strong,” another said. “Really strong.”

  That happened with seizures, didn’t it? A white light burst in front of his eyes, and everything he felt swept through him in a rush, erupting from his mouth in a fierce scream that almost sounded like a roar. The roar of an animal in agony. This was it. He was going to die.

  “What the hell?”

  “What the fuck is going on?”

  “Just hold him!”

  “Dex, think of Sloane.”

  Sparks?

  “Empty your mind and think of nothing but Sloane.” She put her hand to Dex’s brow. “Think of the first time he told you he loved you.”

  Dex closed his eyes and gritted his teeth so tight his jaw hurt. His heart was going to beat out of his chest. No. Think of Sloane. Dex thought about the first time he saw Sloane sparring with Ash in Sparta. His smile had blown Dex away. Dex thought of all the fun they’d had in the office, his time teasing Sloane, driving him crazy, playing pranks on him. He recalled all the times Sloane got his payback. He thought of their first kiss, the first time they’d had sex, then made love. He thought about Sloane telling Dex he loved him.

  “That’s it. Breathe. All you see is Sloane.”

  Dex moaned. His body hurt. It was broken. His bones felt broken. He thought of Sloane on the couch with him, his head on Dex’s lap as they watched movies. He’d made Sloane purr again in Human form. Sloane pouted, and Dex laughed.

  Something pricked Dex’s arm, and he flinched. He was tired, so tired. His eyelids grew heavy, and he appreciated the gentle fingers brushing through his hair, comforting. It was odd. Comfort wasn’t a word he’d ever associated with Sparks.

  “Good. You did good.” Sparks’s voice was quiet when she turned away, but Dex heard her as if she’d been speaking in his ear. “Keep an eye on him. He has to make it through this. I don’t think I need to stress how important he is. Make sure he’s comfortable, and that he doesn’t remember this when he wakes up.”

  Like that was going to happen. There was no way Dex wouldn’t remember this. He felt something cool against his skin, felt the prick of another needle before everything went black.

  MUSIC. FAMILIAR and soothing.

  Dex stirred with a smile. Journey.

  He rolled over onto his left side and snuggled closer against his pillow. The music stopped, and he frowned. Why did it sound so far away? It started up again, and Dex rolled over to the other side, his face and body falling, then hitting something hard.

  “Ouch.” Dex opened his eyes, blinking a few times to get them to focus. Why was he on the floor? With a frown, he sat up. Journey was playing, and it took him a second to realize it was coming from his phone. He grabbed it off the coffee table and turned to flop against the couch while he swiped the screen. His heart skipped a beat when he heard Sloane’s voice.

  “Hey, babe. You okay? Were you sleeping?”

  “Yeah, on the couch. I uh….” Dex frowned. “I guess I fell asleep after you left.”

  “You guess?” Sloane said with a chuckle. “Did the pillow accidently land under your head?”

  Dex took note of his pillow and fluffy blanket on the couch. Had they been there when Sloane left for work? They must have if Sloane remembered the pillow. “Something like that.” He pushed himself to his feet and stretched. Man, his body hurt. He must have fallen asleep at a funny angle.

  “You okay?”

  “Must have been a bit out of it. I remember you leaving, and then I think I went to the kitchen for something. Next thing I know, I’m on the floor.”

  “What do you mean on the floor?” Sloane asked worriedly.

  “I fell off the couch.”

  “Oh.” Sloane laughed softly. “Do I need to get you one of those toddler rails?”

  “Ha. Funny.” Dex sat on the couch and pulled his legs up before wrapping himself in his blanket. “At least I fell of my own free will and wasn’t pushed.”

  “Aw, come on. I didn’t do it on purpose.”

  Dex could hear the amusement in Sloane’s voice. He narrowed his eyes even though Sloane couldn’t see him. “Really? Do you know how far I had to travel to make it to the edge of the bed? Our bed is not small. It’s king-size. Therian king-size.”

  “You move around a lot sometimes. You obviously got too close to the edge.”