Under Loch and Key

by Kathryn Cockrill

  “That’s some pretty great acting.” He teased, propping his head on his fist and tilting it to one side with a smirk. The cocky look on his face was not endearing me to him.

  “What are you talking about?! I’m just trying to get into my block!” My eyebrows knotted as I tried to keep most of the anger out of my voice. I didn’t want him to walk away, given that he was my only lead.

  “Trying so hard that you’ve been sat out here for two hours on that bench?” he gestured behind us to the grass and raised his eyebrow. My mouth dropped open for a second before I snapped it shut again, internally cursing.

  “Were you watching me?” I could forget the helpless student act. It clearly wasn’t working. I may have needed his help but at that moment I really wanted to storm away. He rubbed his hand over the stubble on his chin; that hadn’t been in the picture from Eli. Caden had clearly decided shaving wasn’t as important as he thought three years ago. I hated the fact that it was annoyingly attractive.

  You are not here to like him. Just get the information.

  Crossing my arms across my chest, and not missing how his eyes flicked down at the movement, I waited for his response. He drew out the silence, that half-smirk still at the corner of his mouth. Eventually he dropped his hand from his face,

  “I mean, a pretty girl sat outside my accommodation with a look of pure murder on her face? Why wouldn’t I?”

  Who the hell does he think he is?

  Sighing, I uncrossed my arms. I needed a new tactic.

  He’s caught you, might as well own up to it and hope he’s not as much of an asshole as he looks. Just try and spin it in a way that’ll make him feel like the hero.

  Judging from the cocky grin, girls generally fell at his feet, so maybe that was the way to go?

  Nope. Couldn’t do it.

  Just tell him the truth.

  “Look, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to upset you.” He spoke before I could say anything else, his words startling me from my own thoughts. The smirk had dropped from his face completely. Now was my chance.

  “It’s okay, I just… um. You’re right.” He blinked in surprise but didn’t say anything, “I don’t live here. I don’t even go to this university. I actually came here because I need to talk to you.” More blinking. Clearly, he hadn’t expected that. Point to me. “I was hoping to find you here since this is your accommodation, but I didn’t realise you needed a key card to get in.”

  “Yeah, it keeps strange girls with questionable intentions and clumpy boots from getting into poor, innocent guys rooms.” He leant forward, dropping his voice to a whisper, “I’m the poor innocent guy, in case you didn’t notice.” I rolled my eyes,

  “Yeah, I got it. Though I seriously doubt you’re poor or innocent.” I snapped, pointedly looking at the shoes that I knew came with a hefty price tag and the beat-up leather jacket. Caden laughed,

  “You know, you remind me of my old roommate.” I stilled, watching his face very carefully as he continued, “He had the same personable attitude and a jumper exactly like that.” He nodded to my jumper.

  “You mean Eli?” my voice was quiet, the tension in it almost palpable. He raised an eyebrow at the mention of Eli’s name but, after a few seconds, he nodded. “That’s actually why I came here. I’m Eli’s sister and I’m really hoping you can help me find him.” I held my breath as my words hung in the air between us. The rest of the world seemed to have gone very quiet, the background noises fading out as I waited for his response. His entire face softened as the words sunk in,

  “You’re Ari?” I nodded, “Eli told me about you. Heck, he never shut up about his little sister. He was so proud of you.” Tears sprung to my eyes and I swallowed around the sudden lump in my throat. “I didn’t realise he had disappeared until the police showed up. I’m sorry. Look...” he ran a hand through some stray hairs that had escaped the bun at the back of his head, moving wayward strands away from his face, “Do you wanna come up to my room? I’ll help you if I can.”

  I nodded, still not trusting myself to speak. He swiped his key card over the door and pulled it open, holding it so I could duck under his arm. We made our way up the stairs in complete silence, the cocky attitude gone. When we reached his room, I made myself take a couple of breaths.

  This would have been Eli’s room.

  He unlocked the door and pushed it open. Faded blue carpet greeted us as I cautiously stepped inside. The door shut behind me and clicked into place. Caden slipped past where I’d frozen in the doorway and sat on the bed on the left-hand side of the room. Looking around the room for the first time I noticed that it was completely bare in exactly one half of the room. Eli’s side. The bed was empty, save for a mattress and the walls and drawers were uncluttered. By comparison, Caden’s side of the room seemed like a bomb had hit it. Multiple times. Books were strewn across his desk, clothes piled in one corner next to a bin labelled ‘Laundry’ and water bottles littered the floor. I couldn’t help raising an eyebrow and, when he saw me looking, he hastily kicked a couple of them under his bed. Unsure of what else to do, I took a seat on Eli’s bed, the fabric of the bare mattress cold beneath my clammy palms. The room lapsed into silence, me unsure of how to ask and Caden watching me with an expression on his face that I couldn’t quite read.

  You need to say something. Get yourself together woman.

  “So, Caden…” I tried to transition back into the line of questioning I’d used on people before. “You said you didn’t even know Eli had disappeared? How is that possible? He was your roommate.” Caden stared at me with an expression I couldn’t read for a couple more seconds before answering.

  “He told me he was going home for a few days, which I figured was fair enough given it was right before exams and he was probably stressed. He didn’t seem to be acting unusual and he only took enough stuff for a weekend, so I had no reason to suspect anything different. The first I knew of his disappearance was when the cops came around a few days later and said he’d vanished from his home.” He kept eye contact the entire time. I nodded, having heard that from the police anyway.

  “Eli didn’t ever say anything to you about running away or about having ene…enemies?” I stumbled over the last word, hating the way my stomach seized when I thought about Eli ever possibly being hated by someone.

  Caden shook his head,

  “No. Everyone in the block liked Eli. He was charming, when he wanted to be, much like you I’d imagine, and he was never rude. We got on well.” He sighed, “Look, this feels strange. You’re Eli’s little sister and we’re sitting here like we’re in an interrogation. I’ll tell you everything I know about Eli, but I’d rather not do it whilst we face each other like a Mexican standoff.” His comment made me suddenly aware that I had been sitting like I had a stick up my arse. I could see where Caden was coming from; this just felt weird, especially sat in Eli’s old room.

  “I agree. How would you prefer to talk to me?” He flashed me a grin quickly and I could see the smartarse response formulating in his mind. Luckily, as I levelled a glare at him, he seemed to think better of it and stood up, walking over to a small box by his desk. When he opened it, I realised it was a mini fridge and couldn’t help the snort as he pulled out two cans of fizzy drink. He gestured to the nearby desk chair which I took as an invitation. As I sat down, he handed me one of the cans before sitting back on his bed, far more relaxed than he had been a minute ago. I watched with raised eyebrows as he leant back on his pillows, grey t-shirt riding up slightly to reveal a toned, tanned stomach. He cracked open his can of drink and before I could say anything else, started talking,

  “When I met Eli on the first day of uni, I knew we would get along. He came over to me and told me he was cool with having a mini fridge so long as I tidied up the cans,” I glanced at the battlefield of bottles decorating the carpet and back at Caden with a raised eyebrow, “We aren’t supposed to have fridges in our rooms, so I wasn’t sure if he was messing with me or not, but he seemed
cool. As soon as we got to know each other, heck even before we really knew each other, he’d told me about you. He was worried about whether you would be okay, now that he was at uni. I couldn’t help picturing this adorable little sister whenever he talked about you.” He grinned and looked me up and down, “I probably wouldn’t call you adorable now having met you.” I pretended to glare at him, but I was loving hearing about Eli after not talking about him for so long that I couldn’t even pretend to be mad, “One thing I always noticed was that he carried a notebook around with him everywhere.” I nodded, “When I asked him about them once, he said it was just a hobby, but he filled reams and reams of them. They took up most of the space on his desk and I was always tempted to have a peek when he went home, since he left most of them here, but I never did.”

  “Wait…” I interrupted Caden as a thought occurred to me, “He left most of his notebooks here?” Caden nodded, “Well where did they go after he disappeared? In fact, where did most of his stuff go? We never got it; or at least if we did, my parents hid it from me.” Caden glanced over to Eli’s side of the room,

  “The police sent someone round to collect it all; they said it was evidence? I guess I assumed they would give it back to you when they were done.” I shook my head,

  “I’m ninety percent sure they never gave it back to us. Which probably means they still have it including the notebooks!” The chair squeaked as I shifted, resisting the urge to bounce up and down;

  “What do his notebooks have to do with anything?” Caden sat up, propping one elbow on his faded jeans so he could look at me. I paused.

  I probably shouldn’t tell him anything. I don’t actually know him at all and he could say something to someone else.

  My teeth sought out my bottom lip, chewing and I noticed his eyes fall to them. I stopped quickly, licking my lip instead.

  “His notebooks are the only thing he didn’t let anyone see, so there might be something in there about who could be behind his disappearance. That’s what I figure anyway.” I couldn’t tell him everything. Not when I really had no idea who this guy was. But it needed to be at least somewhat true to get him to believe me. He nodded,

  “Well, the closest police station to your house is on Chestnut Street. That’s the most likely place for them to be stored whilst they were conducting the investigation. I can… I can show you if you like? I kind of owe Eli that much.” He muttered the last bit as he stood up, draining the last of his drink and throwing the can onto the desk. I stood up and moved next to him,

  “What do you mean, you owe him that much?” He looked over his shoulder at me and sighed,

  “I can’t help but feel responsible for his disappearance sometimes. Like if I’d paid attention a bit more maybe I would have noticed if something was off or unusual. Or maybe he would have told me. It sucks that now everyone looks at me like I had something to do with it; they all know Eli went missing and it’s like I’ve suddenly got the plague. I think that’s why they never assigned anyone else to this room.” He looked away from me but even from my position I could see the muscle in his jaw tick as he clenched his teeth. “So, if I have the chance to help his little sister find him, then I’ll do what I can.” I couldn’t help but smile at him. Especially since it seemed that he had had people exclude him as well.

  You don’t have to show him what’s in the notebooks. Just let him help you find them.

  “I’d love your help Caden.” He grinned at me, the tension dissipating. Moving back over to his bed, he grabbed a backpack and threw things in there from around the room. I stood in the middle as he became a whirlwind around me, moving faster than I thought a guy in a leather jacket could do. Generally, they look at the world with an air of practised contempt and ease. Not veritable excitement. Once he was done, he came to a stop in front of me, backpack slung easily over one shoulder. I smirked at him,

  “Why on earth do you need a pair of pliers and what appears to be a tub of hair gel? We’re going to ask for Eli’s notebooks, not break in.” I hoped not anyway. I wasn’t sure that would be the best way to go about getting evidence back. He shrugged,

  “You never know what could come in handy. I’ve also got some tweezers, a protein bar and a bunch of string.” He seemed proud of himself.

  “I would ask why you have all of that to hand, but I’m not entirely sure I want to know the answer.” It was weird how easy Caden was to talk to. I’d thought it would end up being awkward, like all the other people I’d talked to about Eli, but he just wasn’t. I told myself to stop relaxing around him; I still didn’t know this guy very well. But I knew at the back of mind that it was all because of Eli. Some part of me probably thought that, since Caden was my last connection to Eli, he was okay. I shrugged as Caden opened his door again, letting me past. As long as I didn’t end up with an unwanted sidekick or, more accurately, as long as I didn’t end up wanting a sidekick.

  We walked back across campus towards my car. I’d suggested walking but Caden had simply raised his eyebrow at me and continued walking to the car park. When we got there, he hung back a step or two, letting me walk over to my car.

  “Really?” I turned to see him staring at my Hyundai i10 in disbelief, “This is your car? I didn’t take you for a teeny tiny car kind of person. I was expecting something casually cool with a hint of disdain. This is definitely more cute and preppy.” I glared at him over her hood.

  “I don’t see you offering up a car, so shut up and get in.” Yanking open the driver’s side door, I deposited my phone in the console and put the keys in the ignition. After a couple of seconds Caden opened the passenger door and made a big deal of folding himself over to get into the seat. “Oh, give over, you’re hardly Dwayne Johnson.” Once he’d shut the door I slammed my foot down, ignoring his startled yell as he was thrown into the door. I may have smirked.

  “Just so you know, in order for me to get you to the police station, I have to be conscious and, you know, alive.” The mutter came from behind a pained grimace. I didn’t bother replying. Instead I slowed down to a crawl, waiting for directions. With a sigh, he told me to turn left and then straight over the roundabout. The radio was the only sound for a while, save for occasional instructions and the blaring of my own thoughts. The closer we got to the police station, the more I started to feel apprehensive. Why hadn’t they given us back Eli’s stuff? I wasn’t sure it was going to be that easy to get it now, especially given it had been three years. In the console, my phone buzzed, the screen lit up to tell me it was Jake. Caden saw it too, his eyes lighting up as he saw the ‘x’ after the text, the same way Eli’s used to before he teased me. Another pang hit my chest.

  “Don’t.” I snapped on reflex, even though it had been years since Eli, or anyone besides Becca and Jake had tried teasing me. It came out sharper than I’d intended, a leftover from the ache in my chest, cutting through the air before he could say anything; he sunk back into his seat, pouting. “He’s not my boyfriend, he’s one of my closest friends and he’s probably worried about me. I acted kind of weird earlier this week.” I didn’t know why I was telling Caden this. He didn’t seem bothered, choosing to ignore most of what I’d said,

  “Ooooh, ‘close friends’. The friendzone, poor guy… Is he not your type?” he teased “Maybe you need more of a charming, funny, gorgeous kind of guy.” He gestured a hand up and down the length of his body. I snorted, making the next turn. “So gorgeous isn’t your type either huh?” Another text lit up my phone, this one from Becca. Caden fell quiet for a few seconds, “Or am I fighting a losing battle because guys aren’t your type at all?” I tried to hide my smirk,

  “Both Becca and Jake are both my closest friends. Or, were anyway. We haven’t been that close recently…” I trailed off getting lost in that thought. Caden shifted and I snapped back to the present, “Not that it’s any of your business, but since I can see this is going to go on for a while if I don’t answer you, guys and girls are my type. I’m bi. So if I don’t like you,
that’s a problem with you, not your gender.” I enjoyed the moment of silence in the car as he processed that information. When I snuck a glance out of the corner of my eye, I could see a smile playing on the edges of his lips. “What?”

  “Eli was right. Take a left here.” I swung around the corner, trying to concentrate on the road but failing pretty miserably.

  “Eli was right about what?!” I’d never told Eli I was bi because it hadn’t come up. I didn’t think he would treat me any differently and, given that I hadn’t ever had a serious relationship, it wasn’t like I really needed to tell him. Sometimes I felt a bit bad because it seemed like I was keeping it a secret from him, but it had never been that. It was more that I didn’t see the point of making a big deal out of it when I didn’t need to. Caden seemed to know that I was entertaining my own internal monologue.

  “Eli said to me once that he thought you were bi but since you hadn’t said anything to him, you clearly didn’t want to make a big deal out of it. So, he never asked.” I couldn’t keep the smile off my face, even as my chest lurched at the memory of him. I was glad to know he hadn’t been upset. Wait…

  “Why were you discussing my sexuality?” I hadn’t meant it to come out sounding so aggressive, but I’d snapped before I realised. Caden looked away. Was he blushing?

  “I-I’d asked if you were seeing anyone. Eli showed me a picture of the two of you from when he went home for a weekend and you looked cute.” Well, now I was blushing too. At least mine was hidden by my hair. We lapsed back into silence until Caden yelled for me to turn right. I swore under my breath and yanked the steering wheel round, barely missing the curb. Up ahead I could see the sign for the police station.

  Probably shouldn’t be driving like a maniac in front of a police station. It’s not gonna make a great first impression.