Reclusive
Skulls Renegade MC
Elizabeth Knox
Reclusive
(Skulls Renegade MC #9)
Reclusive
This book is a work of fiction. The names, characters, places, and incidents are all products of the author's imagination and are not to be construed as real. Any resemblances to persons, organizations, events, or locales are entirely coincidental.
Reclusive. Copyright © 2019 by Elizabeth Knox. All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced in any manner whatsoever without written permission from the author, except in the case of brief quotations used in articles or reviews. For information contact E. Knox.
https://www.facebook.com/elizabethknoxbooks
Cover design by Cosmic Letterz
Editing by: Tania Jabbour Varela, Knox Publishing
Formatting by: Dee Garcia, Black Widow Designs
Proofreading by Brynn Burke, Knox Publishing
Photography by: Reggie Deanching, R plus M Photography
Cover Model: Darrin James Dedmon
Contents
Acknowledgements
Playlist
Dedication
Warning
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Chapter 19
Chapter 20
Chapter 21
Chapter 22
Chapter 23
Chapter 24
Chapter 25
Epilogue
Note from the Author
Acknowledgements
My Author Tribe: Iris, GG, Jen, Auden, Michelle, Erin, Linny, JP, Brynn, JA, & Christine – I know we may not speak every day, but know I love and adore y’all more than I can write down in words.
My Beta’s, Laura, Tania, Chas, Michaela, Keanna, Rach & Court – Have I told y’all that I adore each and every one of you? I do! Thank you for continuing to give me the best feedback an author could ask for.
My Editor, Tania – You push me, girl. With every book we work on you push me harder, encourage me when I need it, and tell me when I’m downright crazy. I can’t do any of this without you, and your friendship means the world to me.
My Bloggers: Jenna, Jen, Shannon, Chasidy, Angie, Heather, Lizzie, Jamie, Amanda, Deanna, Angela, Rebecca, Alicia, Jamie, Christiana, Christiann, Kristin, Valerie, Anna, Cia, Leanne, Linda, Emilie, Shasta, Nichole, Erika, Starr, Gwen, Nicole, Ashley, Keanna, Myn, Heather, Primrose, Jade, Dusty, Jen, Kristen, Lena, Caroline, Jes, Tracy, Ann, Meaghan, Tina , Charlei, Nia, Marian, Becky, Vanessa, Philomena, Jamie-Lynne, Ashley, Linda, Kathleen, Ashley, Danielle, Laura, Keanna, Tai, Kathy, & Shirley – Goodness gracious, y’all are about to eat Trick up for dinner and want him for dessert too. Don’t say I didn’t warn ya!
KBB, My Babes! – You all have been so patient as I’ve been taunting you with this story for months. I truly hope that it’s well worth the wait and that y’all enjoy it as much as I do.
Playlist
Playlist
Insecure | Svrcina
I’m so tired… | Lauv ft. Troye Sivan
Last Hurrah | Bebe Rexha
Sober | Demi Lovato
Tie Me Down | Gryffin, Elliy Duhe,
Common | Zayn
Dedication
Dedicated to the broken ones,
You may feel like you’re damaged beyond repair, as if you’re not worth loving, but you are.
Remember, even broken pieces can be put back together, and so can we.
Just keep breathing.
Warning
This content contains material that may be viewed as offensive to some readers, including graphic language, dangerous and sexual situations, drug use, murder, and extreme violence.
Chapter One
“The course of true love never did run smooth.”
- William Shakespeare
Trick
I’m standin’ here in this fuckin’ CVS knock off of a pharmacy in the card aisle. Why am I here? Well, if I could answer that I think today things would be a lot clearer. Today is Valentine’s Day. You know, the day when you spoiled that one lucky bitch who gets to suck your cock dry every night. Considerin’ I have one of those now, I thought it would be a good idea to pick her up a card and some chocolates. I figured what the hell, I’ll be in and outta here in less than five minutes. It was gonna be simple, I’d head straight for the candy dressed up in heart packaging, grab a whole bunch of different varieties of chocolate and grab a cute card on my way out.
I’ve been standin’ in this aisle for at least ten minutes, looking at the different messages on these cards. There’s some for boyfriends, husbands, girlfriends and wives. Shit, even some for kids. I’ve looked through almost every one of these and nothing feels good enough to buy for Angel, my girl, my fuckin’ ol’ lady. We haven’t known each other for very long, but I didn’t have to. The moment I laid my eyes on her I knew that she needed me. I don’t believe in love at first sight or any of that shit, but it sure as hell was something.
I pick up this orange card and think to myself, orange… for Valentines? Really? But figure what the hell. I open this fucker up and what it says would hit me deep in my heart if I had one.
‘We may have just met,
But I’m ready for the rest of our lives.
Just don’t give up, no, not yet.’
Corny as shit, but fuck it’ll do. Angel and I aren’t in love or any of that shit, but I find myself caring so much about the girl, even if all she’s done thus far is driving me insane. Having her in my life has been worth the insanity and all the headaches she gives me. I wouldn’t trade it for the world. It’s funny, I’m buying chocolates and a card for a girl that I’ve only known a few weeks when I didn’t even do this shit for serious girlfriends back in the day. Just as I’m walking up to the register, I see a cute teddy bear and grab it, then walk up to the register to pay. I hand the dude a fifty dollar bill and head out to my bike, putting everything safely away in my saddle bag before riding back to the club.
The drive is a short one and not interesting to say in the least. I’ll take boring though. After being in the slammer for all those years, it’s sure nice to have some peace and quiet for a change. While I’ve seen a bit of interesting shit over the last few weeks, it hasn’t been as hectic as jail. It’s ironic how we’re animals confined in a cage, yet it’s one of the most terrifying places of your life, never knowing who has your back or who wants to put a knife in it. Out here… Well, I know exactly who’s on my side.
I get back to the club and see a few of the bikes are gone. I’m sure they’ve just gone to handle some business, but I check my phone just to make sure everything is going smoothly. I pull it from the back of my jeans and don’t see any missed messages. Everything’s all clear from the looks of it. I park my bike, dismount and grab Angel’s presents from my saddle bag before heading inside. I see Daisy on the couch with Ryder playing in front of her. Looking around, I don’t see another person in sight. “Everyone throw a party and didn’t tell us?” I ask her, chuckling.
“Oh, nah. Three’s company is in the back, making an amateur porn video from the sounds of it. A few of the guys are helping Kyle put some finishing touches on his and Meech’s house since the contractors went AWOL and the others are doing who knows what.” Over
the last couple of weeks everyone in the club has started calling Pain, Chaos and Maria three’s company because they hardly ever leave each other’s sight. Not that I can blame them for it. If my girl had been what Maria went through, I’d be doing the exact same thing and stickin’ close to her ass.
“Yeah. I’m sure they want to get everything settled before Michelle gets too big in her pregnancy where she’s uncomfortable. Plus, they have three times the shit to buy for those girls.” I reply. Kyle was fucked up a few months back in an accident. We honestly didn’t know if he was going to pull through. It was touch and go for so long, but thank fuck he did. His girl has triplets on the way and all of his girls need him in their lives. “Angel in the back?” I ask Daisy, already knowing the answer. Of course, she’s in the back. She hardly ever leaves our room.
Daisy gives me a slight nod just as her little boy starts blabbering on, in his toddler language.
I walk down the hallway and turn the corner to where Angel and my room resides. With the way the club is set up, we have one of three rooms in this side of the back with no other neighbors. It gives us privacy, but it’s not like I need it. I’m not getting laid and even if I was, I like it when others can hear my girl screaming her throat out. I think everyone just wants to keep away from us, knowing how mouthy and sassy Angel can be.
She may look like an Angel, but she sure as hell doesn’t act like one.
“Hey Angel,” I greet her as soon as I walk in the door and shut it behind me. She’s sitting on the bed flipping through some sort of girlie magazine.
Her eyebrows cock up as soon as she sees a bag in my hand. “What do you have there? Heroin?” I know she’s joking, but even though she has dry as fuck humor, it hits me hard, deep in my stomach whenever she jokes about using drugs. It’s the last thing I ever want her to do again. My only priority is about keeping her sober and healthy. And happy, I want her to be really happy.
“Well, it’s Valentine’s day and I wanted to show you that you’re special to me.” I say, digging my hand into the bag as I walk over to her, I pull out the cards and chocolate. She tosses the card on the ground and within what feels like five seconds she has that poor little teddy bear’s head ripped right off.
She holds the teddy bear’s body in one hand, while his head is in the other. “This is how special you are to me.”
“Jesus…” I grumble, glaring at her. I just need to get used to this shit. It’s never going to change. Fuck this. I wrap my hand around her dainty little throat and stare into those light eyes of hers. I don’t fuckin’ speak because I don’t have to. I’m showing her who’s in charge and she needs to get it through her damned thick skull.
She tries to speak, but no words come out. I smirk at my grip around her throat before meeting my eyes back with hers. “Are you trying to say something?’
Angel nods slowly.
“I’ll let you talk after I say my peace. Listen up, and listen good. You’re my ol’lady Angel, whether you like it or not. It’s the way it is and the way it will always be. I’m gonna spoil you, however much I want. I’m gonna show you that even though you treat me like a piece of shit, I will never do the same to you because you’re worth more than that. You might not have ever wanted me baby, but you’re fuckin’ stuck with me. Learn to live with it. You know as well as I do that things could’ve been so much worse for you.” I release her neck and press my lips right against her temple before heading to our door, opening it and slam it behind me as I walk away from her.
The woman frustrates the living hell out of me, but I mean every word, and so much more. She just doesn’t understand that I’m going to cherish her through everything, no matter what she fires at me. I’m going to care for her just the same.
Chapter Two
“Some day we will find what we are looking for. Or maybe not. Maybe we’ll find something much greater than that.”
- Anonymous
Angel
With each passing day I’m here I feel more like a stranger. These aren’t my people, and they aren’t my family. It doesn’t even feel like Pain and Chaos are my family most of the time. I’m more of a nuisance to them versus a sister anyways. It’s the day after Valentines and the queen bee, Elena, decided there should be some sort of festive party thrown in honor of the holiday. So, here I am making sure the icing on my skank cake is up to par. I run the knife over the side of the cake, ensuring the ratio is equal on both sides and can’t help but wonder why I even care.
Oddly enough, I want to fit in here, even if I never will.
It’s not like I’m some girl who grew up in this life or fell for the big bad biker. No, my story is so much different. I’m the charity case that the old, somehow still good looking biker decided to dedicate his time to. Trick isn’t my boyfriend but, he sure as hell acts like he is. He calls me his girl, his ol’lady and I still don’t quite understand what it means. Is it like being married? Does it mean more than marriage? From what I’ve seen I think it does. I see Daisy and Seamus, Elena and Reed, and even my brothers with the girl they share. An ol’lady is something that I’m not used to, and I don’t know if I will ever be.
I pick up the plate that my skank cake is on and bring it out to the main area of the club, walking it over to the pool table that we’ve thrown a blanket over. It’s essentially a buffet table now, riddled with desserts, and an abundance of meat options. “What’s that you have there?” I hear his voice before I see him, noticing the curiosity lacing his tone.
Setting the plate down, I turn to look at Trick and think about what I’m going to say. I was nothing but a cunt to him yesterday and I do want to make up for that. I just had a bad day and we’re all entitled to them. Funny enough, Trick has never held one against me. He may stomp off all pissed like, but he always comes back. With the way I treat him I sometimes wonder why he comes back. It’s not like I kiss him or let him fuck me. “It’s called skank cake,” I start off telling him, watching his eyebrows furrow before he lets out a belly laugh.
“Skank cake?”
“Yeah. It’s a vanilla cake with marshmallows, M&M’s and other delicious delights stuffed into one sugar filled orgasm.”
“A sugar filled orgasm, is that so?” His cyan blue eyes light up. “I have a feeling that’s not the cake we’re talking about, Angel.” For the first time since I’ve been with Trick, if that’s even what I can call it, I think he’s flirting with me.
“Well, you’re just going to have to try a piece and let me know how you like it.” I say to him, hoping deep down that he does enjoy it. I love to bake sweets when I have the opportunity. I’m no Betty Crocker but I can get the job done.
Trick looks past me, and I turn to see Reed signaling him over for some reason. “Gotta go, babe. I’ll be back in a bit. Behave, will you?”
“I always behave.” I firmly state, flashing him a devilish smile.
“If that isn’t a crock of shit, I don’t know what is.” Trick mutters under his breath as he walks away, and for some reason I want to reach my hand out and grab him. I don’t want him to leave. Every day I fight something inside of me, telling me that I don’t need him to help save me, that he’s only with me because I am a charity case. But then there’s this other side of me that believes I may be able to have something feasible with him, something real.
Something that I’ve never had with anyone before.
Never have I been an actual person to any man, I’ve always been an object.
I look around the room to the abundance of people. Some I recognize where others I don’t and spot my brother, Chaos, sitting by himself on one of the couches. We don’t really get along at all but he’s a friendly face in a crowd. Well, sometimes friendly. He won’t admit it, but I believe he still resents me for not staying clean. Both he and Pain were able to get off the drugs and create a better life for themselves, where I just remind them both of someone, we all hate – our mother.
She chose the drugs over us too many times to count, and here
I’ve been doing the same. I’m not a mother, though, so it’s different. Right?
“I’m shocked you didn’t lock yourself in your room with a needle in your arm.” He grumbles out, crossing his arms.
“Jesus. Isn’t the point of me being here to stay clean? It’s kind of hard not to think about being high when you keep bringing up drugs.” I snap. The thing that pisses me off the most about Chaos is that he knows how hard it is to stay clean. He has felt every single thing I have, and so has Pain. In all honesty, he knows better.
I don’t want to hear whatever retort comes out of his mouth, so I rise from my seat on the couch and go over to the newly dubbed buffet table, scanning it for something awful and sinfully delicious. I grab some sort of pink cake pop and toss it in my mouth, chewing just as I hear her. “Fuck. Why is she still here?” I see the girl named Jenna roll her eyes at me from across the table and don’t understand what sort of problem she has with me.
I think about staying silent, but biting my tongue has never been my specialty. “I could say the same thing to you. You’re here all the time and don’t live here. Can’t you just do us all a favor and leave?” If someone wants to be a bitch to me, I have no problem being one back. Especially when I’ve done nothing to deserve being treated in such a way.
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