by Huss, JA
“Of course I got her a gift.” I point to the ring box on my dresser.
“What the hell is that?”
“Exactly what it looks like.”
“You bought her an engagement ring?”
“Not an engagement ring. Just… a really nice ring.” Jack just stares at me with an open mouth. “What? She is the girl I love. This is not a secret. We all know Cadee and I are the real couple here, not me and Isabella.”
Jack shuts his mouth. Puts up a hand. “OK. I… I’m… not even gonna touch that. It doesn’t matter. Where’s the collar?”
“What?”
“The collar, Cooper. You have to collar her tonight. Do you really think everyone is here to eat dinner and drink eggnog?”
“Everyone? What are you talking about? Who is everyone?”
“Cooper! What the fuck have you been doing all semester?”
“My project. You know this.”
“How are you so ignorant?” I’m just about to get up and fuck his nearly-healed face all the way back up when he raises his hand and laughs. “Oh… shit!”
“What?”
“I guess I didn’t realize that you’ve never been to one of these before. OK, listen. I apologize.” He sits on the couch arm and faces me with a smile. “This is my fault. I guess it was my job to inform you on tonight’s ritual.”
“Ritual? It’s Christmas Eve. I’m pretty sure I know what happens.”
He holds up a finger. “Give me a sec.” Then he starts texting. “I’m sending Leela to the house to pick up a collar for you to use. We have an extra.”
“You have an extra… collar?”
“It’s a long story. One we don’t have time for now. Ask me again in two weeks and I’ll be happy to explain. But tonight, Cooper…” He shoots me a very familiar big-brother smile that instantly makes my heart ache for all the things I’ve lost this semester. Including my innocence.
Which is almost a joke. But up until six months ago when summer rush started, I really did think these people were my family. That we were, like it or not, related. That they do, somewhere deep down inside, love me.
I am such a dumbass.
“Tonight, Cooper…” He claps me on the back. “You are the man of the hour. Everyone is here to watch you show your little halter pony.”
“Excuse me?”
“Sorry.” Jack laughs. “Little breeding humor there.”
“Not only was that not funny, but it went right over my head.”
He pats my back again. “Like most things, little brother. Like most things.” He takes a deep breath and starts explaining how I will collar Cadee Hunter in front of the elite members of Fang and Feather.
I don’t say anything through his monologue, I just let him talk and remind myself that this is all part of the plan. Isn’t it?
Leela appears holding a bright blue Tiffany bag. She tells me not to open it—she wrapped it up nicely so Cadee will get the full treatment. And then I’m slipping my arms into a suit coat while Jack holds it out for me, and Leela is straightening my tie.
She pats my chest. “I’ll go grab Cadee. Meet you boys downstairs.”
She leaves and I study myself in a full-length mirror. Jack stands behind me and our reflected gazes meet. “What?” he says.
I just stare at him for a moment. Trying to reconcile this monster with the brother I used to know. He’s in so deep, he’s never getting out. And he’s OK with that.
“What, Cooper?”
“Nothing. Just trying to imagine the future.”
“Is that troubling you?”
“Troubling?” Is he kidding? “No, not troubling. It’s just not very clear right now. What happens after graduation? Father mentioned grad school and I don’t know. Am I really cut out for grad school?”
Jack actually laughs. “Grad school? You?”
“Why is that funny?”
He just chuckles and squeezes my shoulder. “Let’s not get ahead of ourselves here, Cooper. You’ve still got one more semester. Let’s go. Everyone is waiting and I’m sure they all need to get back to their families for their own Christmas Eve traditions.”
Jack walks towards the door, but I take one last look at myself in the mirror.
Who are you?
No clue.
But I’m about to find out who they want me to be.
CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT - CADEE
The entire mansion smells wonderful.
I’ve been in my room most of the day but when Leela and I returned from the spa earlier, I made a point of checking out the dining room where the staff was setting up for the evening festivities.
Leela grabbed me gently by the arm and whispered, “Don’t get excited, Cadee. None of this is for you. We talked about this, remember?”
Of course I remember. You don’t forget your first conversation describing how you are chattel. I am literally Cooper’s slave. That’s my term, not theirs. I’ve been paying very close attention to the word choices these past few months. Leela didn’t say “chattel,” either. She uses terms like “indentured” and “service” and once she even said my job was a “calling”. Like I’ve joined a nunnery.
Which is just hilarious.
But I took Victor’s advice about the dictionary and looked up the word ‘offering’.
A gift.
A contribution.
A proposal.
But the synonym that stood out the most was… sacrifice.
I am some kind of sacrifice.
So are Mona and Sophie. But Mona and Sophie are just getting started, aren’t they? They didn’t take the accelerated crash course like I did.
And it’s weird, too. Because you’d think that the crash course would be jarring. Being thrown into something is a shock. If I were brainwashing someone I’d avoid the jarring shock and go straight for the easy boiling-frog method myself. Because a shock makes you react, a slow drip of insanity eventually becomes normal.
But what do I know. Seems to be working on me.
Neither Jack nor the Chairman even talk to me. They don’t even look at me. I’m not worth their attention. Cooper has been absent for weeks now. He lives in this house and he hasn’t come to my room once.
So what? He thinks he can just walk up to me outside in the driveway and tell me to leave? Again? Fuck that. I didn’t come this far to give up now. I don’t know what Cooper is doing, and I don’t really care, either.
Dante’s plan fell apart months ago, all the people I thought were friends are busy carving their own new roles in Fang and Feather, and at this point I’m here for one reason and one reason only. I will find out what my parents were to these people or I will die trying.
“Knock, knock!”
I love how Leela always opens the door first, then says, “Knock, knock.” It takes all my willpower not to roll my eyes at her.
“Ready?”
“I’m ready.”
She steps all the way into my room, then closes the door and walks over to my vanity and stands behind me. Our eyes meet in the mirror and then she leans down and presses her lips into my neck. She stays like that for a moment. I watch in the mirror as her eyes close, then she kisses me. Lingering just a little bit too long.
“What the fuck are you doing?” comes out of my mouth before I can stop it.
She puts her hand over her heart as she straightens. “What?”
“You just… creepy-kissed me on the neck, Leela. What the fuck was that?”
“You’re silly, Cadee. Get up. Let’s get your robe on. Cooper is waiting.”
Yes. I have a robe tonight. It even has a hood. And it’s black. So fucking cliché I can’t stand it. But the robe is a good idea because what I’m wearing underneath it is basically a fancier version of the Maiden’s night gown from the tomb. And by fancier, I mean shorter. And by shorter, I mean doesn’t quite cover anything below my hips and my panties are nothing more than strings. The neckline is elastic so it can easily be pulled down, which is probably gon
na be super convenient for Cooper at some point.
Leela insisted that this is what all the “offerings” wear when they get collared. We had a long talk about tonight while I was at the spa. I wasn’t getting my nails or hair done. I have no make-up or nail polish on and my hair is just unstyled and straight. I was there to get waxed. My pussy is so smooth right now, even I want to touch it. But Leela explained that once Cooper collared me, I would have to display my gratitude.
When I asked her what that meant, she said, “It’s up to you.”
I’m just assuming that means a blow job. And I’ve steeled myself for the eventuality that Jack and Leela—and possibly the Chairman—will be watching me give Cooper a blow job tonight.
I want that to be shocking when I think about it, but it’s not. Not really.
Cadee’s conditioning part three is all about hyper-normalization.
You take all those things that once shocked me and you normalize them. Then you expose me to it over and over again until giving my boyfriend a blow job in front of others is just something we do here.
Leela likes to talk about sex. Every time she and Jack fucked it was the topic during our next lunch date. And she was explicit. Told me all about how talented Jack is. She even showed me a picture of his cock. Then she asked me to compare it to Cooper’s.
They are pretty similar, actually.
I am so deep in this rabbit hole, I sometimes don’t recognize myself.
Leela holds the robe up and I slip my arms into the silky, bell sleeves. There is only one satin tie to hold it closed, and that’s at my throat. She stands in front of me and looks me in the eyes as she ties it into a small bow.
Then she leans down and kisses me on the lips.
I pull away instinctively. “Leela. What the fuck?”
She places her hand on my cheek. “You make me so happy, Cadee. I can’t wait to see you bloom into a proper offering.”
I make a face at her. “I don’t know what that means.”
“Don’t worry.” She pulls her hand away. “You will.” She turns away, but then quickly turns back. “No blow jobs.”
“Excuse me?”
“Tonight. If you’re thinking you’ll show your commitment to Cooper with a blow job, I would like to caution you right now, that’s not enough.”
“I don’t understand.”
“Be creative, Cadee. No one is impressed with a blow job. Whores like Elizabeth give blow jobs when they are demoted. Not sweet sacrifices like you during their initial ascension. So think of something else. Remember—you exist to challenge Cooper. Give him the opportunity to rise, Cadee.” Then she opens my bedroom door and pans her hand at the dark hallway that is lit up with pillar candles spaced about six feet apart that lead to tonight’s destination. “Let’s go. The men are waiting.”
The men? And that’s when I hear them. The low rumble of male voices somewhere deep inside the house. “What men? I thought this was private?”
“Private?” Leela cocks her head at me. “Nothing is private, sweetie. Not for any of us. But for you especially. You belong to everyone, Cadee. All of us own a piece of you. Tonight, it’s just Cooper’s peers and the newer members, though. Every blue-blooded male from the last four graduating classes. They’re the ones who have been paying your way all these years and this is the first of their many rewards for that generosity. I won’t be there, or any of the other wives. Not this time.” She pats my hand. “But don’t worry, I’ll be close by.”
“Wait!” I grab her arm. There’s a lot to parse in that statement, but I concentrate on the most pressing one. “What do you mean, Cooper’s peers?”
“Come on, Cades. You know what that means, sweetie. Lars and Ax, of course.”
I’m shaking my head as she talks. “No. Ax would not come—”
“Oh, he’s here. Don’t you worry about that. He’s here. And it’s no big deal, right? You’ve already done that. Lots of times.” Then she winks at me.
“How do you know what I’ve done?”
“Cadee. We’ve got vids, honey. Cooper filmed you. Every single time.”
“What?”
“No more questions. We’re late. Walk in front and follow the candles. When you reach the door, pause until everyone notices you, then walk straight to Cooper and kneel. Just like we discussed. Got it?”
I’m thinking maybe I should make a break for it. Just push this bitch out of my way, hit the patio door, run outside and… then what? Where would I go?
The people I would usually depend on—Ax, and Lars, and Cooper—they’re all here. I don’t even know where Isabella lives. So even if I was dumb enough to go there for help, I can’t. Mona is a giant no, since it’s pretty clear from the way the bodyguards showed up at Victor’s house the other night that they are part of the problem, not the solution.
And then a conversation with Victor from that first day of summer rush pops into my head. There’s a path, Cadee. Right behind the Glass House. And that path takes to you to a gate. And outside that gate lives the real world. You could just slip out the gate and be done with it.
Why didn’t I do it? Why did I stay?
Are the answers that important?
I mean, four months ago I was a millionaire. I had everything. I could’ve left. And if I really wanted to talk Cooper into going with me, he would’ve gone. We would’ve grabbed Isabella and we would’ve left. We would be safe right now. I would not be walking down a dark hallway lit up with candles towards yet another bizarre sex ritual.
Is the truth really worth all this?
The hallway ends and that question hangs in my mind as I realize the path turns down a little alcove that leads to another, much narrower hallway.
I can hear them. They are getting louder because I am getting closer.
The narrow hallway is very dark because there are no candles. But the flicker of firelight beckons me forward towards an open door.
I look over my shoulder, just to check and see if Leela is there.
She is. Not right behind me. She’s back where the narrow hallway began, but she’s definitely making sure I don’t stray off the path.
I look forward again. I don’t want to hear her crazy bullshit right now. I just want to get this over with and be one step closer to the secrets. So I take that final step, stand in the doorway, and wait as every single man in the room looks in my direction.
They go silent.
I find Cooper in the crowd. He’s standing in front of a throne at the top of the room. Not a room—it’s a chapel. Behind the throne a long, gold banner with the High Court lions hangs from the cathedral ceiling. On either side of him are three six-foot-tall floor pillars with flickering candles.
I wait there, unsure what to do. But then Cooper sits down on the throne and all the men in the room back up a little so that there is a clear aisle for me to walk. I glance around nervously, looking for Ax first. He nods at me. Then Lars. He takes a deep breath.
Then they both walk up to Cooper and stand on either side of him.
Then the men in the room begin to chant. Leela warned me about this, but I am not prepared for how fucking creepy it is to have men chanting as you stand in a candle-lit house chapel wearing a black robe.
I can’t make out the words they say. I’m not even sure they’re speaking English. It might be Latin.
Cooper beckons me to walk down the aisle towards him with one crooked finger. He looks calm. Very self-assured. In control.
And why shouldn’t he? He’s the one sitting on the throne.
I walk. One step at a time. Trying my best not to look at the men on either side of me. They are wearing robes too. Gold ones. Only Jack, his friend, Ax, Lars, and Cooper aren’t wearing the gold robes. They are just wearing very nice suits. Like this is just another corporate event.
With each step I become angrier.
But I’m not sure who I’m angry at.
Cooper? Because he’s sitting on that throne?
Jack? Because h
e and Leela set me up so thoroughly?
Lars? Because he stayed away?
Ax? For not trying hard enough to stop me from going through with this?
All the rest of them? Because they buy into this insanity?
Or… just myself? Because every moment leading up to this one was my choice.
I reach Cooper and kneel down on a black velvet cushion with gold tassels and then I settle back on my butt, the way Cooper taught me to sit when we were just ‘practicing’.
I bow my head too, because I’m not supposed to look him in the eyes until he tells me to.
“Cadee,” Cooper says. “Look at me, Cadee.”
I’m very close to him. His feet are less than a foot from mine. And when I raise my eyes, he’s leaning forward with his forearms flat on his knees, hands lightly clasped together between his legs, his blue eyes more disturbing than ever.
“You’re a good girl,” he says. “Such a good girl.” His fingertips reach out and pull on the silky ribbon at my throat. The bow falls to pieces and my robe spreads open. His hands gently brush against my shoulders and the robe falls down my arms. Then he pulls on the elastic of my night gown, dragging the neckline down so my shoulders are bare.
He licks his lips. Like he’s getting turned on. I glance between his legs and find a bulge there.
Against my own will, heat blooms between my own legs.
We are all sick here. All of us.
But especially me.
Because I suddenly know how I will challenge Cooper to rise tonight. And it’s turning me on just thinking about it.
Both of my hands dart out. One grabs the hard bulge on the side of Ax’s thigh. The other cups Lars’s balls.
Cooper just looks at me. I never take my eyes off him. “What the fuck are you doing?”
“I’m not a good girl, my king. I’m very, very bad.”
CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE - COOPER
THREE YEARS AGO
The snow is falling so gently, everything has a slow-motion quality to it.
And it’s quiet too. Just the sound of her boots as she walks further and further into the woods. Her coat is light blue wool. It’s an old-fashioned double-breasted style that flares at the waist and has a wide, tight belt. She is wearing yellow gloves and black boots that go up to her knees with fake fur underneath the crisscrossed laces.