Kiss and Break Up

by Ella Fields

  I started slow, drinking and bopping around as people sprawled over the couches and danced over the coffee tables and jumped up and down on the floor.

  A guy with venom tainted eyes had his hand wrapped tight around the neck of a bottle of Jack, and I squinted at him, trying to place whether I’d seen him before or not.

  I hadn’t. Wade must have invited the whole town, and that was why there were so many people.

  I kept drinking, and his head tilted as he watched me down the burning liquid. It soon caught fire and spread through my limbs. The sigh that left me had my eyes shutting as I slouched back into the wall.

  When I opened them, the guy from the couch was there, leaning against the wall next to me. “Name?”

  “Does it matter?” I licked my lips. He had nice eyes. Dark, depthless, and framed in a thick layer of black lashes that matched his cropped hair and the stubble peppering his jaw and thick neck.

  His thin lips met, then opened as he smiled, flashing me a glimpse of his teeth. “I suppose it doesn’t.”

  I could hardly hear him, and I’d lost interest in dancing. I crooked a finger at him to follow me, knowing he would. I was probably a sure thing to him, and that was precisely what I wanted him to think. We moved to the stairs, and the sight of Raven talking to a caramel-skinned guy who sometimes rode with them had my ankle almost rolling.

  He looked up, his brows rising and my name on his lips.

  Not wanting to cause any alarm, I waved, smiling easily, then continued up the stairs.

  “Know him?” the guy trailing me asked as we neared the top.

  I grabbed the railing as a group of guys raced by, throwing themselves down the stairs and leaving us in a dust of laughter. “Raven? Yeah. You?”

  He shook his head. “New to town. I haven’t seen you at school.”

  “I go to Magnolia Cove Prep.” I took another swig of whiskey as we meandered by a couple of girls making out in the hall, then headed toward the upstairs living room.

  The guy said nothing, and sick of calling him guy, I gave up the lame attempt at remaining mysterious. “I’m Peggy.”

  His shirt pulled taut at his arms as he swung them and surveyed the half full room before looking at me. A smile bloomed as he said, “Todd.”

  We sat on the floor by a long-arched window, and I listened as he told me about where he’d grown up and how he’d had to move here due to his mom’s job transfer. She was a nurse, and he was hoping to head to medical school after college.

  “What about you?”

  I’d kept drinking as he’d talked, my head spinning as I stared at plastic cups getting kicked around on the marble floor in front of us. I hadn’t wanted to know about his life, but as he spoke, I found his deep voice a nice fit for the numbing taking place inside my head.

  “Me?” I asked, my head swaying a little too far to the left.

  He frowned at the bottle between my legs. “You’ve had a fair bit of that.”

  “It’s good.” I took another sip, then offered it to him. He declined by lifting his own bottle. “And I want to get into computer science. Design some games.”

  He laughed. “Whoa, that’s awesome.”

  “Yup.” I popped the word. “Can we make out now?”

  Once again, he laughed, then coughed. “Oh, wait. You’re serious?”

  I nodded, licking my lips as I tried to build the excitement by staring at his. I could kiss him. I wanted to. I planned to kiss a lot of boys before I ever let another one close enough to ruin me so completely again.

  Setting his drink down, he glanced around the room, and I did too, but from our vantage, all I saw were legs and more trash rolling around on the floor.

  Warm skin met my skin, turning my face, and then his forehead was almost touching mine, the scent of alcohol heavy on our breaths. “Are you going to remember kissing me tomorrow?”

  My lids felt heavy when I blinked. “It depends how well you do it.”

  Eyes blazed and then closed as his mouth melded to mine. He took the challenge seriously, his lips firm and coaxing mine into action.

  A growl rippled around us, and the fact I’d evoked that sound from him already had my hand reaching for his face. Until another set of hands pulled me from the floor, and I clued in.

  Todd hadn’t made that noise. It’d come from the furious cussing wall of man who was slinging me over his shoulder.

  “Dash!” I screamed, ramming my fists into his leather clad back as he hollered at Todd.

  “Do you have a death wish, motherfucker?”

  “She didn’t say she had a boyfriend.” A pause, then, “I wouldn’t hold her like that too long. She’s had a lot to drink.”

  Dash’s grip on my thighs only tightened, and I feared it’d bruise if he didn’t let me go.

  My stomach sloshed, and my head swam. “Don’t tell me what to do, or I’ll rip out your idiot tongue and feed it to your ass.” Then we were bouncing downstairs as I continued to scream.

  No one stopped him. No one even tried to help me. They all parted like the Red Sea, and it wasn’t until I was thrown into the back seat of his car and the doors shut that he said a word to me.

  “It’s like you want me to wind up in prison.” The engine started as I slapped my hands around on the door, trying to open it. “Locked. You’re not getting out of this car until I let you out, so quit it.”

  “Argh.” I flopped back onto the seat as he sped down the street. The world was upside down, streetlights and rooftops dancing by the windows. “What are you even doing?” I shouted the words.

  “Taking your ass home.” His tone was more curt than usual, and I heard leather creak as though he was clenching the wheel too tight.

  “I didn’t want to be rescued. I was having fun.” I forced myself to sit up, realizing that was a bad idea when everything took its time to take shape before my blurred eyes. “Who the hell do you think you are?”

  “Yours, but apparently, it’s taking some time for you to get the memo.”

  “Maybe because you fucked someone else.”

  Another growl followed his hand slapping the wheel. “We weren’t together, and you’d flayed me right open too, Peggy. Do we need to go over how once again? Because even though just thinking about it kills me, I’ve got no place else to be.”

  “He was my boyfriend.”

  “He was never your boyfriend.”

  I leaned forward, hissing at him. “He was too, yet I still wouldn’t have sex with him.”

  “Enough.” Dash’s throat corded. “This isn’t a game anymore, Peggy. It never was.”

  “It’s nothing anymore, Dash. Get over it already and leave me alone.”

  He parked in front of my house. “If it’s nothing, then why are you so intent on getting drunk and making out with other guys?”

  “Because I can, and because I hate you, and because I want to forget all about you.”

  He undid his seat belt, turning to me with raised brows.

  I groaned, launching myself at the door that still wouldn’t open. “Let me out.”

  Dash sighed, then unlocked the doors, and I almost fell to the grass. He rounded the car, locking it and hoisting me into the air.

  “Jesus. Just put me down.”

  “No.” He marched over the grass, stopping to grab the spare key from its hiding place behind a broken piece of wood on the exterior of the house, then unlocked the door.

  After setting me on my bed, he walked back out of my room. I thought he’d left when I heard the front door close until his footsteps traveled back over the ancient floor.

  “You can leave now,” I said, kicking off Mom’s heels.

  Dash grabbed them, leaving the room again to take them to hers while I stripped out of my skirt.

  He returned as I was pulling the duvet back, a bottle of water in hand. Holding it out to me, he took a sweep of my bare legs, breathed out a loud exhale, then left the room again.

  “The hell are you doing now? You better be l
eaving!”

  “Not leaving,” he said, returning with a bag of chips and splitting it open.

  Shucking off his boots, he watched as I got settled and took slow sips of water, then set the chips next to me on the nightstand. “You should eat something to help soak up all that Johnnie.”

  I put the bottle down and frowned as he took his jacket off. “And you should go home.”

  He climbed over my legs, lying down over the duvet and curling onto his side. “Already am.”

  Those words had me sputtering, they were a fist colliding with my chest, and I yelled, “No, you’re not. You wrecked me. You ruined me. You destroyed me. You’re not home. You’re not anything to do with me. I can’t …” I drew in breath after breath, unable to get enough air as the world turned an array of bright colors. “Where did you even go?”

  “Shh.” He pulled me down to the bed and rubbed my arm. “Settle down, or you’ll be sick. I stayed at some shit-star hotel for a week and watched soapy as fuck TV.” Seeing my narrowed eyes, he added, “On my own.”

  “Seriously?”

  “Seriously.”

  My heart wouldn’t stop galloping. “I hate you.”

  “I know.” He sounded defeated, but I knew better.

  “I despise you.”

  “I know.”

  “Was it worth it?”

  “No,” he said. “Fuck no.”

  The burning in my eyes couldn’t be extinguished, so I let the agony roll free.

  Dash watched, his own gleaming and causing my tears to fall faster.

  “Please don’t cry, Freckles.” I’d never heard or seen him so vulnerable. “Please,” he whispered.

  “It’s your f-fault,” I stammered.

  “I know.” His breath blew warm over my face as he sighed. “I know.”

  The pounding started near my temple, and as it grew, morphing into a giant ball of pain inside my skull, it forced my eyes open.

  Sunlight crested the bed, its soft rays indicating it’d not long began its ascent into the sky. The glow fell over the bed, and I shut my eyes, my mouth dry and coated in a layer of film that would probably take three rounds of brushing to clear.

  They were heavy, but I forced my lids open again, taking in the sharp angles of the man lying beside me. His hand was close to mine, and the hairs dusting it matched that of his lashes, a dark brown that drew attention to his arctic eyes.

  The depths beyond were frightening. Though the temptation to test the frigid waters called to me, I’d never felt it so acutely as I had this past month. Now I knew better.

  You could get lost in a face like his—the high cheekbones, the feathered arches of his brows, and the masculine jaw. The dimple and his smile were an extra dose of unnecessary charm.

  But it was his eyes. They wouldn’t just cause you to lose your way; they would haunt you until you lay trapped beneath their intensity.

  Even asleep, all he was couldn’t be gentled. He was a slumbering beast veiled behind an angelic face.

  His voice caught me before his eyes did. “I’m so hard right now, I could probably hump your mattress and come.”

  My head thrashed as I attempted to roll my eyes. “Good morning to you too.”

  One bright blue eye blinked open, and the groggy smile that illuminated his face had my breath stalling, a harsh puff of air leaving my nose. “Fuck, I love waking up next to you.”

  I rolled to my back, closing my eyes against the brawl taking place inside my head. “You should go before Mom gets home.”

  “Not so fast, Freckles.”

  “Stop calling me that.”

  He huffed, his voice rough from sleep. “Like you can ever stop me.”

  I said nothing, wishing he’d leave and wishing he’d stay and tell me this had all been one messed-up nightmare.

  “Do you remember kissing that guy last night?”

  “Of course, I do.” I didn’t care that it would probably hurt him to say that. I wanted to hurt him. “He was sweet, and he—”

  “Okay, claws in.” He yawned. “I’m not going to lie, it felt like I’d swallowed a bouquet of knives when I saw that.”

  Ignoring the nausea his words ignited, I tried to think back to how he’d even known I was there. An image of Raven popped into my head. God. Duh.

  “What do you want me to say, Dash?”

  “Well, that you were at least thinking of me. I’m pissed, Peggy, but I’m trying with everything I’ve got here.”

  “Trying?” I sighed, not in the mood to fight with him.

  “Trying to ignore it long enough to focus on the long-term goal.”

  I barked out a disgusted laugh. “Long term. And what is that?”

  His voice roughened. “Your lips on mine for eternity, and no one else’s ever.”

  Flutters filled my chest cavity, taking flight. I tried to squash them. “I’m not sorry.” I wasn’t.

  “I know you’re not. That’s why I’m still here. I know you only did it because you’re fucked up over me.”

  “Your ego knows no bounds.” I pushed the sheets off, wanting away from him.

  “Call it what you like, but we both know it’s true, Peggy Sue.”

  I adjusted my panties, which were stuck between my ass cheeks, knowing he was watching, and smirked at my opened drawer as I plucked out a fresh pair.

  “You’re going to fucking kill me.”

  “Nope, I’m going to shower. Be gone when I get out.”

  I washed my hair, taking my time under the hot spray to make sure I erased every bad decision I’d made the night before. After brushing my teeth and rinsing my mouth, fog trailed me to my room, and my stomach dropped as I saw Dash with his hand around himself.

  “What are you doing?”

  He grunted. “What’s it look like?”

  I threw my damp towel at him. “Stop it.”

  He caught it with his free hand, then groaned as his eyes skirted over my body. “Thanks. Now lose the other towel.”

  My stomach flipped, and my lips parted. “No.”

  He smiled at the soft tone of my voice. “No?”

  I couldn’t take my eyes off his length. Entranced, I stood there, feeling myself grow wet as he pumped himself faster, squeezing and groaning while he looked at me.

  He’d taken his shirt off, his jeans and briefs bunched at the tops of his thighs. “Dash.”

  “Come here.”

  I did. Lord help me, I couldn’t stop myself from closing and locking the door, then moving to the bed.

  “There’s my girl.”

  His words wrapped around me like a warm embrace, sending lava through every vein and directly between my legs. Grabbing my hand, he removed the other from his length and took my face with it. “Now let me kiss away the memory of every asshole who’s dared to put his lips on yours.”

  I fell over him, my lips ravenous as I gripped his cheeks, then sank my fingers into his hair, my legs sliding over to straddle him.

  His tongue was hot, and I tasted mint. “Did you brush your teeth?”

  “Stole some mouthwash,” he said, ragged, then bit my lip. Air hit my skin as he tugged on the towel I’d wrapped around myself. “Holy hell, I think I’m about to blow.”

  I started rocking into him, rationale dissipating with the promise of pleasure and everything I wanted but couldn’t have lying right beneath me.

  “I can feel you,” he whispered, his hand digging into the back of my head as the other one palmed my breast. “So hot and wet over my dick.”

  I whimpered, shockwaves of bliss exploding as my hips moved faster and his tongue moved from my mouth to my neck, licking before his teeth scraped at my skin, then pulled. I gasped, and he soothed the sting with his lips. “Shit, it’s like I’m fucking thirteen again. Gonna come.”

  My hand held his head to my neck, my eyes mashed shut as I chased the magic coursing through me. “Me too.”

  A deep throated groan was my only warning before I felt warmth coat my stomach, my panties,
and his teeth clamped onto my skin.

  It sent me over, and his fingers found the dip of my spine, tracing the curve as I swayed over him, riding it out, our heavy breathing the only sound other than the birds outside my bedroom window.

  I fell on top of him, and he laughed as his spunk stuck to both of us. I didn’t care. I didn’t even care that I couldn’t be with him. Right now, I was at peace. And that peace, accompanied by his hands outlining every dip and line of my back, became enough to have my heavy, swollen eyes fluttering closed.

  Dash

  Time moved slowly yet way too fast as I listened to the sound of Peggy’s quiet breaths and felt them heating my skin.

  Her face had nuzzled into my neck, and even though I could feel my own sperm sticking to my stomach and hers, I wouldn’t have moved for anything.

  Her skin was silken, fine hairs rising with each sweep of my fingers. I couldn’t believe I could do this. That I was doing this. That she was sprawled over me, entrusting me to hold her as she dreamed.

  It felt like a dream. Like some type of foreign landscape I’d only ever dared to imagine before, but never thought I could bring to fruition.

  My eyes drifted closed as I tried to soak in every damn thing about these stretched minutes in time. For even though I hoped that when she woke up, she’d forgive me and we could do this every day, I wasn’t sure if she would.

  Seeing that guy pawing at her face the night before, watching her kiss him as I’d shoved my way through the partygoers to get to her was akin to walking over hot coals.

  I was ready to pound his head into the wall, but I had to check myself. I was there for her, and bloodying up some loser wasn’t part of the plan. I’d done that already, and it’d done us no good. The plan started and ended with her. And I was still trying to end it by begging and hoping for a new beginning.

  I knew why she kissed him, and though I’d wanted to slap her ass and growl obscenities at her for stabbing me repeatedly in the chest, I couldn’t. She was kissing him because of what I’d done to her, and she’d continue to act like someone she wasn’t until it stopped hurting.

  I hoped like hell that after last night and after she’d rubbed her clit over my shaft until her breaths whistled out of her, that some of that pain had dispersed.