Kiss and Break Up

by Ella Fields

  “You totally have to show your grandkids that.”

  “You’re acting like we’re some foregone conclusion.” I slammed my locker, my chest a bubbling, bouncing, mess.

  Daphne bit into her apple, chewing before she commented. “Because you’re probably the only one who doesn’t see that.”

  We pushed inside the cafeteria, heading for the back doors to sit outside. “He slept with Kayla. How am I the only one, besides her, who remembers that?”

  “Because you love him, and it hurt you, but he was hurting at the time, and he’s a dick even on the best of days.” She took another bite, mumbling around it, “If you and Byron hadn’t gotten a little freaky in the back of that limo, he wouldn’t have been so crushed. He would’ve continued to fight for you, and you know it.”

  Guilt gripped me, and I blew some curls from my lips as the wind washed over us. “This is all so stupid and messed up.”

  “Love is always stupid and messed up.”

  I pointed at a table near the garden ledge, hoping Dash wouldn’t bother looking for me. He always sat with his friends at lunch anyway. “Have you spoken to Lars?”

  She tossed her apple into a trash can, taking a seat. “I don’t want to talk about him.”

  “Fine. Have you heard from Willa?” I asked as I slid into the bench seat.

  The weather had cooled, but not so much that I’d rather sit inside among the prying eyes and careless whispers. Where I was easy prey for Dash.

  I’d thought too soon. “Oh, Peggy!”

  “Shit.” I fumbled and dropped my sandwich on the ground.

  Daphne started choking on her water as Dash took a seat right next to me, straddling the bench. “Dropped your lunch? No problem. I bought you some mac and cheese.”

  Daphne was crying, fanning her eyes to keep her makeup in place.

  My heart was racing, stumbling over nonexistent hurdles, and landing flat on its face. “Dash, please go.” I didn’t even look at him.

  His knee bumped my thigh as he scooted even closer. So close that if a teacher walked out here, which they would soon, he’d be asked to move. “Not going to happen. Also, I heard you mention Willa.” He unwrapped some utensils, stabbing the cheesy pasta with them and pushing one toward me.

  Heat rose from it, and the smell just about had me salivating. I tried not to buy too much from the cafeteria even though Dad took care of anything to do with school. Mom liked to make my lunch. Ever since we’d moved out of Dad’s, it was something she seemed to take pride in. But I couldn’t say I didn’t get excited on the days when I didn’t bring any.

  Swallowing my pride, I pulled the mac and cheese closer, stirring it before blowing and taking a bite. “Thanks,” I grumbled.

  “You’re welcome.” He began eating his own.

  “What about Willa?” Daphne asked.

  Dash swallowed his mouthful. “Right. Yeah, someone tattled on her and Jackson. I don’t think she’s coming back.”

  My fork dropped, and Dash caught it before it hit the table, setting it in the bowl. “She’s not coming back?”

  “Holy shit.” Daphne blinked, wide eyes directed at the wooden table.

  “Yep,” he said, uncapping his water and taking a sip before offering it to me. I declined. “Apparently, she’s been kicked out. Gone to live with her dad.”

  Her dad lived half an hour away on the outskirts of the cove, and I turned to Daphne, unsure of what to even say.

  “She didn’t tell us,” Daphne said, her forehead creasing.

  Dash waved his fork around. “I daresay she’s had more pressing matters to address, like, oh, I dunno, moving out of the house she’s grown up in.”

  Daphne thinned her eyes at Dash, who just kept eating.

  He had a point, though, and so I tried not to feel butt hurt over it. “We need to call her.”

  Daphne nodded. “Emergency scrap date.”

  We finished eating in silence. Mainly because I was starving, but also because I didn’t know what to say with Dash right there, and the shock sitting heavy between me and Daphne.

  When Lars came to the table, Daphne stilled, then immediately packed her things and said she’d see me in geography.

  “Jesus,” Lars groaned, rubbing his chin. “She really hates me, huh?”

  “You did get some other girl pregnant while you and her were starting to get serious,” Dash said.

  Lars almost growled. “It was before we started hooking up.”

  “Potato, potahto,” Dash sang.

  I spoke before the fists Lars was clenching on the table could do any damage. “Keep trying.”

  He blinked at me beneath dark lashes, his jaw relaxing. “Yeah? She say something to you?”

  “I wouldn’t tell you if she had.” I packed up my lunch. “All I’m saying is that you should keep trying.” I got up, taking it to the trash before heading to the door as the bell rang.

  “Freckles,” Dash said, exasperated. “Not even a goodbye? I bought you lunch.”

  “You shouldn’t have expectations when you do nice things for others.” I stalked between the tables inside the cafeteria, keeping my eyes trained on the doors ahead.

  His hand snuck around my waist as soon as the doors shut behind us, and he pulled me into a tiny alcove behind a row of lockers. “Dash, no.” I pushed at his chest as he pressed himself against me.

  “Be mad, but just look at me while you’re doing it.” I scowled at him, and he chuckled, his thumb dancing over my cheek. “That’s it.” The humor faded from his expression, and his eyes took on a softer sheen. “Did you get my poem?”

  A sound left me, half laughter, half breath. “Yes. Very romantic.”

  He grinned, then licked his lips, and I knew what he was about to do, so I ducked beneath the arm above my head and raced down the hall.

  His laughter shadowed me. “Never forget that I can run faster, Freckles.”

  Peggy

  I hadn’t been online since Dash left my room on Saturday. Partly because I knew he’d probably be online, and partly because I had no motivation to play.

  But after school the next day, and another round of Dash cornering me at every turn, I needed to switch off. He was everywhere—at school, in the parking lot, texting my phone with pathetic but kind of funny gifs, and worst of all, in my head.

  I couldn’t shake him. But at least online, I could ignore him. Maybe even just block him. Though that was likely to have him showing up at my house.

  I shoved my homework aside, then shimmied on my stomach to my nightstand and nabbed the remote. While I waited for it to load, I checked my phone, hoping for a message from Willa. There’d been radio silence, and Daphne and I had wondered if maybe her parents had taken her phone.

  I had to believe she’d get in touch or else I was going to find Jackson, who showed up at school today looking like he’d sunk to the bottom of a whiskey barrel and almost drowned.

  The game loaded, and I went through the motions, deciding my weapons needed an upgrade. I picked the battle axe and some nunchucks. That’d do.

  I lasted all of five minutes before someone shot me, and then a message popped up on screen. I knew he’d been online, but I’d just been happy he’d let me be. Until now.

  F*ckoffandie666: Want me to kill them for you?

  Don’t respond, don’t respond, don’t re—

  PegSue12: I’m good, thanks.

  F*ckoffandie666: Yeah, you are. ;)

  Ugh. My phone rang, and I switched the game off to answer it.

  “I can’t even. I know we can’t party, but I need out. Movies?”

  I pondered it, unsure. “I’m grounded.”

  Daphne groaned. “Just ask, maybe she’ll be fine with it.”

  I told her I’d call her back. I could go for some popcorn and a different kind of distraction.

  “Hey, what’s up?” Mom asked.

  Laughter rang sharp in the background. Familiar laughter.

  “Where are you?”

&nb
sp; She scoffed. “At a friend’s. Why?”

  I shook my head, jumping up off the bed to check my purse. I only had a twenty, which wouldn’t be enough. “Daphne wants to go to the movies.”

  Mom laughed at something someone said. “Sure, just be home by nine.”

  I frowned, pulling the phone away from my ear and checking I’d indeed called my mom and not someone else. “Seriously?”

  “Yeah, I’m kind of busy, ’kay? I’ll see you later.”

  “Wait,” I rushed out. “I need some money.”

  She sighed. “I won’t be home for a while, so you’ll have to come and get the card.”

  Dad gave us a credit card to use, but Mom tried to avoid using it, not wanting to take too much from him when they weren’t even married anymore. She knew giving it to me would be a bad idea, but she did let me borrow it when I needed something and she was strapped for cash.

  I grabbed my keys and purse, quickly giving myself a once-over in the mirror before nodding. “Okay. Where are you? Phil’s?”

  “No, I’m at May’s.” She hung up, and once again, I stared at my phone.

  “May’s.” I mouthed the word over and over, unable to make sense of it as I drove to Dash’s.

  And damn it, he’d been online, which meant he was probably home. Which meant I’d need to sneak in, grab the card, and bail.

  I called Daphne on the way over, and we went over the movie times, deciding on one in an hour.

  “And tacos,” she said before hanging up. “I need some freaking tacos.”

  I agreed, then hit end call on the steering wheel before driving through the looming opened gates.

  Mom’s secondhand car looked like an alien perched between two super models as its faded blue paint glimmered in the afternoon sun between Dash’s Rover and May’s Mercedes.

  I moved up the curved stairway to the heavy oak doors and pushed one open. I didn’t want to ring the doorbell and alert everyone to my presence. It was better if I just grabbed the card and made a run for it. Not to mention, I was supposed to be grounded. Whatever Mom was doing here had her forgetting about that.

  I slipped off my boots. The house was huge, but I wouldn’t put it past Dash to hear their thud on the expensive wooden floors. Tiptoeing down the hall, I stopped and caught myself. I was acting insane. Completely stupid. Who cares if he saw me? I’d just leave anyway, like I’d planned to. I did have plans.

  Squaring my shoulders, I wound down the ever-winding hall until I heard the sound of laughter in the family room closest to the kitchen.

  I halted in the arched entry, trying to make sense of what I saw before me.

  Mom and May were sitting together, side by side, a champagne bottle open on the glass coffee table and a bunch of photographs between them on the maroon chaise.

  “He looks dashing,” Mom said, holding a picture up to better survey it.

  May laughed. “Oh, you used to always say that, thinking you were so damn funny.”

  “I am funny,” Mom retorted, taking a sip of her champagne.

  “Keep telling yourself that.” May pursed her lips, flicking through a stack of what looked to be pictures of me and Dash from homecoming, judging by the flashes of bubblegum I glimpsed that matched my dress. My ruined dress.

  I swallowed, then made my presence known by clearing my throat. “Uh, hi.”

  They glanced over, and May smiled. A real smile. Teeth and everything.

  God. What was happening?

  “Darling, come in. Look at these,” she cooed, gesturing for me to join them by patting the empty space next to her.

  I shifted closer but remained standing. “Oh wow,” I forced out, staring at the photo of Dash and me. He was smiling against my head, and I was ducking mine, smiling at the ground. Before I knew what I was doing, I’d taken the photo, holding it close as my heart beat faltered.

  We looked happy. Even when we were anything but. As if it were natural for us to find comfort among one another while the world continued to shift beneath our feet.

  My eyes welled. A tremor flitted through my hand as I gave the photo back.

  May waved me off, taking a sip from her flute. “Keep it. I’ve printed dozens.”

  Of course, she had.

  I smiled in thanks, then cleared my throat again, trying to rid it of emotion as I rounded the coffee table to Mom, who was fishing in her purse for her wallet.

  “Don’t get too crazy,” she warned. “What are you guys seeing?”

  “Some romantic comedy.”

  Mom raised a brow. “You hate those.”

  “Daphne’s idea.” I sighed, slipping the card and photo inside the breast pocket of my blouse. “We’re grabbing some tacos, so don’t worry about dinner for me.”

  “Tacos?” May perked up. “I haven’t had a taco in years. We should get some. Do they deliver?” she asked Mom, already googling on her phone.

  Mom smiled at me with a look that said she’d explain later.

  “Uber eats,” I told May.

  “Uber what now?” She furrowed her brows, her long nails tapping over her phone screen.

  “A driver will pick up your order and bring it to you,” Mom informed.

  May’s mouth gaped. “That is genius. Why haven’t I heard of this before?”

  I shook my head, smiling at the ground as I went to leave. “Well, have a good after—what are these?” A stack of applications laid on the glass coffee table. I must have missed them in my first quick assessment.

  “Dash’s college applications,” May said. “Would you mind checking them? He’s been adamant he only applies for the schools you plan to apply for, so it’s best to be sure.”

  My heart stopped as I picked them up and began sifting through the pages.

  All three applications were for schools I’d told him I wanted to attend. One local to us, Gray Springs, and one in New York.

  “Looks fine to me.” I set them down in a messy heap and exited the room. “See you later, Mom.”

  May hummed. “Are they still fighting?”

  I didn’t catch Mom’s response, too intent on getting out of there before the tears finally escaped.

  Jumping into my boots, I raced for my car and stumbled slightly when I saw Dash leaning against the driver’s side door. “Told you I’m faster.”

  He had one foot tucked behind the other and wore no shirt, his black sweatpants hanging low on his sharply defined hips. His stomach contracted as he pushed off my car, taking a slow step forward in his slippers. “Did you think you could come here, and I wouldn’t know?”

  “How did you know?” I asked, trying to blanket the emotion that’d almost split me in two mere seconds ago.

  He huffed, scratching at the stubble growing in beneath his chin. “I feel it every time you enter a room, Freckles. Quit being foolish.”

  “I’m not the fool. You are.”

  “I’ve been the biggest kind of fool. The worst.” His teeth dragged over his lip, and my breath plumed, rushing out of me as I stared. “Where are you going?”

  “That’s none of your business.”

  A brow lifted, and he crossed his arms over his chest, making the muscles in his arms appear even bigger. “Well, I’ve got no place to be. My girl keeps bailing on me, so I’ll just wait right here until she opens her pretty mouth and tells me what she’s up to.”

  “I’m not your girl.”

  “Then quit looking at my body like you want to lick it.”

  I coughed out a laugh, then dragged my eyes from his smooth looking skin. “You’re so full of yourself.”

  “You can be full of me too, if you’d just forgive me.”

  My stomach heated. “You did not just say that.”

  His teeth flashed, lips curving into his right cheek. “I’ll say it again for those hard of hearing.” His voice rose to a shout. “You can be—”

  I slammed against him, shoving my hand over his mouth. His tongue swiped over it, his eyes glittering blue jewels pressed between ent
rancing lashes. “Stop this, right now.”

  I realized my mistake when his arms circled me, holding me tight to his body. My hand dropped to his chest as I tried to push off him. “I’ll ask one more time before I wrestle your keys from you. Where are you going that’s so important you had to come and get your Dad’s credit card?”

  Damn him for knowing every fucking thing. “To the movies.”

  He tutted, his eye twitching as his hold tightened. My breasts squished into his warm chest, and all I could smell was that clean soapy scent mingling with the fading aftershave on his skin. “Over my dead body. With whom?”

  Overheating. I was overheating, and I had to go. “Daphne.”

  He didn’t release me. His hand drifted to my chin, tilting it for his mouth to lower over. “I think I’ll come with you to make sure you’re not lying.”

  Oh, my God. I had to end this because he would. I knew he would. “I saw your college applications.”

  A harsh breath vacated him, feathering my lips. “You did, did you?”

  I nodded, and his hold loosened just enough for me to push off him but not enough for me to escape. Though I definitely could have if I wanted to. I suppose I didn’t want to. “What did you do that for?”

  His brows knitted. “Because it was always the plan.”

  I wasn’t sure if he was referring to college or us. “But then we landed in a steaming pile of crap. You can’t base your future off the decisions I make for mine.”

  “Like hell I can’t,” he said. “And I can study business at any old crummy college. Those plans are flexible, but the plans I have for you?” He shook his head. “Nowhere near the realm of flexible.”

  I gave up on holding them back, and he wiped at the tears leaking out. “What if—”

  “What if what? We’ve fucked it all up already, and now we have one option.” He kissed a lone tear near my eye, licking it as he whispered, “To go all in. I’m already there, waiting for you to let go and meet me in the deep end.”

  “I’m scared,” I said, unsure where the admission had come from.

  “Good.” Dash’s body felt impossibly warm against mine as if even his skin was trying to reassure me. “If love doesn’t terrify you, you’re not in love. And if you’re not in love, then what are you, Peggy?” He didn’t wait for me to answer that. He opened the door, then helped me inside. “I’ll be tracking your phone, just FYI.” After tapping the roof, he watched as I backed out.