Everwinter (Chronicles of Naelyra Book 1)
Page 18
My arms wrapped around his strong shoulders, and I held him to me. “Kane, I’m not leaving. I’m staying. Someone would have to drag me out of here forcefully to take me from you now. And I wouldn’t go down easily.”
He let out a small chuckle. “No. I supposed you would not.”
Moving slowly, I straddled his hips so I was fully facing him, my arms still around him. His grip on me became less rigid as his fingers slid up and down my back. I kissed the top of his head. “I’m sorry.”
He jerked his head up. “You have nothing to be sorry for. I should not have reacted as strongly as I did.”
A smile creeped across my lips. “I see now.”
He tilted his head. “You see what? Could you not see before now? Were you blind?”
I knew he was being literal, and it made me giggle. “I can see just fine with my eyes. But I also see now that you do love me. That this is real.”
He blinked. “Had you doubted my words?”
I lifted a shoulder. “It’s not that I doubted you. It’s just that your reaction showed me the depths behind your words.”
His lips came crashing down on mine as his hands moved up, gripping my hair. After a kiss that made my heart beat out of order, he pulled back. “Do you feel it now?”
I smirked, reaching down and taking him in my hand. His hard cock showing me in yet another way how he felt for me. When I lifted up slightly, brushing the tip of him over me, I smiled at the moan that rolled from his chest. Lowering down, taking him in me ever so slowly, I savored the feel of him filling me and the slight pain as he gripped my hips tight.
“Auri…”
“Shhhh…” I set my finger on his lips.
Moving my lips to his before moving my finger, I moaned at the taste of him. “Just love me.”
He growled again. Only this time, there was no anger; only carnal desire. “Always.”
Chapter
Nine
Nightmares
The slightest bit of light came through as I barely started to wake, my eyes fluttering open to adjust. Sunlight made its way in through the spaces between the heavy drapes that were parted, allowing for the breathtaking views that lay beyond them. At one window, Kane stood, arms crossed, hair and clothes neatly pulled together, looking out over his lands.
He looked like an angel standing there, not at all like a vampire. His long, blonde hair, his lean, muscular body, his piercing blue eyes. And, of course, how he could stand there, completely naked, arms folded in front of him as he gazed out of the window, the sunlight caressing his features. I was glad that one myth was false, that he wasn’t relegated to a life of darkness – of living in the night.
It wasn’t a complete surprise. I knew that the vampires on earth were not affected by the sunlight either. But looking at him right then? I grew an appreciation for it that was not lost on my consciousness.
Pulling my hair up, I made my way over to him and leaned into his back. I placed my hands on his arms and my chin on the back of his shoulder, kissing him softly.
He reached back, pulling me to him more. “Good morning, little one. Did you sleep well?”
“Yes, actually.” I relaxed into him. But I could tell he was all but calm. “What’s wrong, my king? You seem like something is troubling you.”
He moved fast. In a blink, I was pulled around in front of him, and his arms were around me. “Do you feel safe here, Auri?”
I’d long given up on correcting him on my name. Auri was his thing. That and little one. I smiled up at him. “More and more every day. Why?”
He moved his gaze from me to back out the window. “After yesterday, I worry that you feel we all are out to attack you. I fear you are afraid for your life and that is why you stay by my side.”
Shocked by his words, I reached up and placed my hand to his cheek. My heart broke as his eyes closed at my touch. “Kane… last night in the bathroom was…”
He stopped me. “Not just that, Auri. The man in the tavern and Mika in the hallway. I will protect you even if you do not love me as I love you. I need you to know that.”
There was a lump in my throat that threatened my ability to speak, let alone breathe. “The man in the tavern was trying to warn me from a danger that did not apply to me. And Mika…” My mind replayed the brief fight I’d had with her. I hadn’t even let myself think about what had happened. And I sure wasn’t ready to unpack that scene right then. “Either way, I do not fear you or my safety as long as you are near.”
“But that is my fear.” He took a step back. “If it is for your safety only that you stay with me, I do now want you to think that you must be romantically close to me to have my protection.”
“Do you not want me close? Have you changed your mind after last night?” For a moment, my chest felt heavy, as if something pressed down on me, crushing me.
He closed the gap between us again, his hands slid to either side of my face, tilting my head up to look at him. “I want you even more. But I want you to be here, with me, in this way because you want to be. Not because you feel it’s the only way to feel safe.”
“I want to be here with you like this.” I placed my hands on his. “I was worried that your loyalties would lie with Mika, and you would not want me here knowing how badly she wants me gone.”
“Mika is being dealt with. I assure you of that.” His words were pointed.
“Dealt with? How? And how are you? I know you care about her.” My hands slide up his arms and back down to his hands.
He rests his head on mine. “She is unruly. Like a feral faxori. I care for her like a little sister.” He pulled back to look me in the eye. “I do not care for her romantically, despite her having those feelings for me. I have yet to sentence her, but she is being held. Guards are in and out of her room until I arrive. I will be banishing her until she proves that she can accept that she and I will never be as well as prove herself to not be a threat to you.” He ran his hand over my hair, smoothing out the stray strands flying about, resting his head back on mine.
“Kane?”
“Auri?”
“What is a faxori?”
He laughed. “It is the common animal version of the animal god, Faxorum.”
“Ahhh…” I leaned into him.
He held me close. “I could get used to this.”
I smiled. “I said I wasn’t leaving.”
“Yes. But…” he trailed off before continuing. “I mean for longer than until the portals are working again.”
My eyes found his. "Play your cards right, and you'll get to feel me pressed against you for the rest of my life. Well, until I'm all old and ugly and you don't want me anymore."
Sorrow clouded his beautiful, blue eyes. "I could make you forever if you allowed me."
My eyes found the floor beneath us. "But I'll grow old and die one day. So, just as you've pointed out, I'm but a drop in the bucket of time for you." I bit my lip. "But I want to make the most of the time I do have if I can."
He pressed a finger to my chin, lifting my face. "I mean, I can turn you." He kissed me again. “I don't want to lose you. It is a way to keep you from that fate."
I stopped moving. Feeling frozen in place, my eyes land on him squarely as I struggled to take a breath. "Would that not be a step beyond marriage? Would that not bind us in more permanent ways?” It dawned on me then that I was probably wrong seeing his reaction to my new arch nemesis. “Oh… Mika. You’re not bound to her, so, it wouldn’t be like that, would it?”
His fingers brushed my cheek as he moved a lock of my hair behind my ear. “The act of siring you would carry a small binding weight behind it, but it does not equal love. My love for you is its own thing. Siring enhances the connection between a vampire and the person they change. I did not love Mika.”
“Oh.” I rolled my lips between my lips.
A small grin played on his lips. “I did not love Mika romantically, so our bond was strengthened by my love for her as a friend. But I l
ove you.”
“Ohhh…” I giggled.
“Yes.” He nodded, as if confirming that he knew what I was thinking. Which, honestly, wasn’t a stretch to conclude. I was realizing that if he did turn me, it would make his love for me stronger.
I changed the topic slightly, “But once turned, I cannot become a mother.” I wasn’t sure which way I felt on the topic, but the question pushed its way out of my mouth before I could stop it.
His hand roamed over my tummy. “That is correct.”
“And you want me to, no?” I was stunned by this question more than what I’d previously said.
The same shock flashed across his face for a split second before he returned to his usual expression, leaning in and brushing his lips against my ear. “I want many things.”
"You, sir," I touched the tip of his nose. "Are the most skilled at avoiding questions I have ever met. Do you know that? But I did ask a question."
He sighed and leaned in, burying his face in my neck, breathing me in. His hands slid up my sides. Then, I his fangs grazed against the soft flesh just under my ear.
"Kane! Answer me!" I heard an urgency in my voice, half reacting to the exquisite feel of him so close.
He pulled back enough to see my face. "I'm sorry what was the question?" He looked amused.
I pouted. Bottom lip out and all.
Kane let out a breath and kissed the tip of my nose. “I want many things, little one. But over the years, I have never considered finding someone I would be so scared of losing yet so intent on keeping close to me, no matter how dangerous that is. And yes. A part of me is pleased at the idea that we could have children. That you would mother my children. That we could be a family. I gave up on that longing many years ago. Yet sometimes, I find myself lost in thought, dreaming of such a day with you. So, while the answer to the question you mean to ask is yes. A part of me wants that with you. The answer to the more broad question is… I want many things… with you. And while intoxicating, I can not help but know full well that it puts both of us in danger if we are not careful… and even if we are.”
"It looks like we found the one thing that scares the shit out of you." I played with a few strands of his hair.
He tilted his head. “Oh?”
“Mhmm…” I grinned. “Me.”
His fingers slid down my cheek to my shoulder. Holding me in his hands, he examined the contours of my face. Almost absentmindedly, he spoke, “If I believed in such things, I would almost say I have seen a glimpse of our future. I have seen how happy we would be if we let ourselves have this.”
“If not for the prophecy,” I added.
He shook his head as if trying to expell some trance. “Little one, as I have said, I do not believe in such things.”
“Then what do you believe in?” I asked.
“I believe that you are my queen, and we will be happy.” There was no hesitation in his response. Only certainty.
My heart ached for him. I could see the battle raging in his mind. He wanted to believe his own words, but he felt what I felt… something was looming over us. And while I wondered if he knew what those dangers could be, I was illequipped to have a clue since I was not from his world.
I breathed deeply, lacing my fingers with his. “What dangers?”
“Hmmm?” He was lost in thought again.
“Dangers.” I kissed the palm of his hand. “You said something about dangers. Am I in more danger then when I got here? Am I putting you in danger?”
He doesn’t respond right away. Not with words anyways. For a moment, his eyes searched mine as he measured his words to what he thought my reaction will be. I can see it in the way his expression changes back and forth. The tip of his finger trailed from the part in my hair, around my face along my hairline to my jawline. A dark cloud crossed his eyes before he pulled his shoulders back, pulling me closer into him.
Kissing my forehead, his lips stayed against my skin as he spoke. “No matter the danger, I will protect you, my little one… my queen.”
Of course, I had so much I wanted to say, but in that moment, it wasn’t about me. It wasn’t about what I needed or wanted. I became so completely aware of him and his love for me… his desire to keep me safe and keep me his, my words disolved before they reached my tongue.
I took his hand in mine and started walking backward to the chair by the fireplace. Repeating the chant I’d previously spoke that stoked the fire before, and it roared to life.
I positioned him in front of me and placed my hand on his chest, pushing him back into the velvet seat. Climbing on top, I straddle his hips. I didn’t wait, nor did I have to. His body had already reacted to me, and I slid down on top of him, moaning as he entered me.
Sitting down with him completely inside of me, I kissed him deeply. My pull to him causing my heart to race even more when his hands gripped my sides, and he moved his hips just enough that I could feel his shaft pulsing against my walls.
“Kane?” I breathed.
“Yes, love?” His lips moved to my throat.
“What happens when we get the portals working? If I want to escape the dangers. Will you come with me? If that’s the way to keep me safe?”
“No. I can not leave the people on this world. Without me, they are vulnerable. It is not that I would not go with you to the ends of the universe. But leaving Naelyra does not make you safe. If threats to you develop here, they will follow you. I have to take a stand.”
“Is that why you want me to be your queen?” I tightened down on him, my fingers pressing into his flesh a bit.
“I want to make you queen to make you happy. Women want the world to know what they own." He playfully patted my butt and thrusted up into me.
I moaned before reacting to his words. "Oh no! No you don't. Look around you Mr. Rathmore!" I waved my arm about. "You own a city and live in a castle. A lavish castle. Do you not announce, proudly, what all you own? Is it so bad for a woman to want to feel secure in her life? It's not like being this lavish just to show off. It's not putting your latest lover in jeweled attire and parading them about. But it is making a statement that the role she's in is rightfully hers in case someone might challenge that or try to take it away… or take her away."
He chuckled, his voice husky, full of desire. "Are you saying you want to marry me, Auri?” He kissed more along my neck, raking his fangs against my skin again.
“I am saying that I love you, Kanedraven Rathmore.” I rose up far enough that he almost slipped out and paused. "Time is a commodity you have plenty of. But on my world, tradition is honored. And in tradition, the woman does not ask for marriage. If it is right, the man asks for the woman’s hand."
He yanked me back down on him and let out a growl before he chuckled. “Just her hand?”
I opened my mouth to respond but then realized he was being sarcastic. “Yup. Just her hand.”
“And what if I want more than just her hand?” He pulled me back down, and his hips started keeping a rhythm.
“I would suppose, unless you plan to make it otherwise, the rest of her would come with said hand.” I glanced down at my own hands and blushed.
A corner of his mouth curls up and slowly as he bounced me a little harder on him. "Tell me what kind of ring is expected on your world in order to keep one’s hand… and perhaps all of her.”
I blinked, frozen for a moment. "Ummm. a variety. It depends. But gold, white gold, rhodium... one of the better metals that doesn't tarnish or tarnish the skin. And usually a diamond. Sometimes a bunch of them. Sometimes one. Sometimes small. Sometimes large. And sometimes the metal is a simple thing or is ornately carved. Like I said... it varies. Sometimes the woman picks it out. Sometimes the man does." I had stopped rocking my hips and was sitting on him, my hands on his chest. "Why? Do you want me to stay so badly that you're willing to give me what I want despite it not being what you want?"
He took in all the words I said. Obviously thinking it over by his expression. "I think
I have been holding back honestly. In things that I have wanted in my life. Now, I know one of them is you. And you the most above all else. It is not that I do not want to pledge myself to you. It is that I do. I simply have not wanted to pledge myself to anyone for a very long time."
"If you put a ring on my finger and speak vows to me, it needs to be because you want to as well. Not to simply make me happy or to shut me up or to keep me around to fuck me." I kissed his cheek, starting to move my hips again.
“Binding is not done for manipulation. It is done for love,” he states plainly.
I leaned forward, kissing his neck. “For love.”
“For love.” His lips were on my ear. Kane moans and thrusts deeply. "I want to show you my world. I want to do everything with you and show you everything."
I didn’t slow or loosen up on him. Actually, I did the opposite. I work to keep the pace, my fingers digging into his shoulders as he slid in and out of me. "Should I stay with you, what would I do here?" I kissed his neck again. The tip of my tongue trailing along the soft part of his neck up to his ear. My breath warm on him as I whispered. "What can we do, my love? What is this everything you want to do with me?" I lightly dragged my teeth over his earlobe.
His hands ran down my back, leaving trails nail marks as they dragged across my flesh. "I… I want you to be mine, I want to live my life with you, I want you…" His moans grow loud.
I held him to me as he came, feeling him filling me completely. Hugging him tight, I smiled. "You have me.”
“Do I?” He hadn’t stopped despite finishing. He was determined to get me to climax as always. And he was so good at it, seemingly knowing exactly what to do to get what he wanted. I swiftly got there. as he pulled me in and moved his hips against mine, pushing deep inside me as our bodies were pressed together tightly, his lips searching mine hungrily. He fit perfectly, hitting just the right spot, causing me to fall over the edge into ecstasy with only a few more thrusts.
Panting hard, I all but collapsed against him. “Mhmm…” I started to rise up off him.