2 Times the Bliss

by Sapphire Knight

  He shakes his head, and his dark, sandy hair falls over his forehead. He must’ve skipped the gel and just stuck a hat on this morning. He’s cute like this, so Nate—like the carefree guy I remember. His hazel irises take me in, as he lightly grazes his fingers along my jaw.

  “Not in the slightest, sweetheart. I want to tell you I love you every time I see you.”

  His words give me hope. I’ve wished for him to be mine for as long as I can remember. I thought it’d never happen, that he’d hate me, and yet, he doesn’t. He’s here, right now and telling me he loves me. It’s everything I’ve always desired.

  He continues. “You can’t change fate. We’re obviously destined to be a part of each other’s lives in some way. After thirteen years apart, you’re suddenly placed in my life again out of nowhere, and I discover I have a daughter with you. It sounds like maybe the Lord thinks we’re supposed to end up together at some point.”

  “I won’t lie, Nate, and try to deny it. You’re saying everything I’ve always wanted to hear. Even being around you again, it gives me this feeling, this...it’s like I’m suddenly whole again, after a piece has been missing for so long. All this time, that piece I’ve been missing in my life has been you.”

  He flashes a sexy grin, intertwining our legs more as he wraps his arm around to pull me tighter to his chest. We’re all tangled up in one another. “I love you, Shine baby.”

  The nickname he used to call me when we were teenagers has me choking up. God, I was so stupid to try to ever stay away from him. He’s everything. “I love you too, Nate. Always.”

  We seal the proclamation with a tender kiss, and I feel him growing hard again under my thigh.

  With a laugh, I joke, “Woah big man. Our daughter will be home soon, and while she’ll be happy you’re here, she’ll be extremely alarmed if we don’t have any clothes on. She hasn’t witnessed us kiss or even hold hands yet.”

  “Good point, but we need to come back to this,” he proclaims.

  I beam a wide, happy smile in return. “Definitely and often too.”

  “I like how you think.” He winks and moves to sit up. Once his feet are planted back on the ground, he reaches for his boxers and my shirt. He mentions, “Just so we’re clear, I won’t see anyone else, and I expect you’ll do the same.”

  “Well, yeah, of course. We’re completely exclusive in my book.”

  “Then that’s a good book.”

  “Smartass.” I giggle, and he flashes a smile, handing me my clothes. He moves to pull his boxers on, and I complain. “Wish you didn’t have to get dressed already.”

  “We’ll have plenty of nights that we can stay naked longer together.”

  “True. About that. So, you don’t mind if I come down on the weekends and stay when Natasha does?”

  “Honey, I told you already, I want you there. You’re always welcome. Since we’re talking about this, I may as well bring up everything.”

  I swallow, nerves overtaking me. What could be so imperative for him to suddenly become all solemn with our little chat? We just determined we’re exclusive, isn’t that about as serious as it can get at the moment? “Okay?”

  “Clyde, Dallas, and I have been working on my house nonstop, since the summer.”

  I nod, egging him on to continue.

  “It’s finished now, and I’d like for you and Natasha to come down and stay with me,” he begins as the front door opens and we’re no longer alone.

  “Mom?” Natasha calls out, before peeking her head in and finding me and Nate on the couch talking. We’re fully dressed now, thankfully. I’d have been mortified if we weren’t, and even more so as my mom comes in right behind Natasha.

  “Hey!” I greet happily. “Thanks for bringing Sashy home,” I tell my mom, and she nods. The older woman flicks her gaze between Nate and me curiously.

  “Dad!” Natasha exclaims and dives at him for an enthusiastic hug.

  “Hey, sweetie.” He embraces her tightly. Then addresses my mom, “Mrs. Simmons, ma’am.”

  My mom offers him one of her pageant smiles. “Nice to see you, Nathanial. Now, you all have a good evening. I have a roast in the oven I need to get back to.”

  “I’ll see you tomorrow,” I mention, and she presses a quick kiss to Sashy’s forehead.

  Something else I’ve been struggling with this week as well is if Sashy were to stop seeing my parents as much as she does now. They love her, and it would gut them if she weren’t around regularly. I don’t know what to do. I know she wants to be with Nate more. Nothing seems fair to her.

  We spend the evening as a family, cooking dinner together and then we end the night with a very competitive game of Yahtzee. It may not seem like much to some, but it’s everything I’ve always wanted for Natasha. If I’m being honest with myself, it’s what I’ve wanted as well. Nate was the missing piece to our puzzle, and when we’re together like this, it feels like everything is right in the world.

  “Thank you for today,” he rasps as he holds me to his solid frame. The man is carved from marble, I swear. He was always fit, but he’s gotten better with age. While he was getting hotter, I chose to spend my time making a name for myself as a successful family attorney. We’ve both grown and matured in our own ways, but it definitely helps that I get to pet his abs when I want to!

  “I should be thanking you. None of today would’ve happened if you hadn’t suggested we talk over everything. I’m not just saying that because you think Sashy needs to live with me either. I mean it about everything. I’ve wanted to be with you for so long and finally being able to admit that I love you, my shoulders feel lighter.”

  “I’m glad to hear that, and I feel the same way. I didn’t get to finish, however, before your mom and our daughter interrupted us.”

  “Oh, no? I didn’t realize, or I’d have told Sashy to shoot some hoops to give us some more privacy.”

  He shrugs, putting a little distance between us, and I miss his embrace instantly. “It’s fine; it gave me a chance to spend a good evening hanging with my family, so the delay was more than worth it.”

  “You’re making me uneasy, now,” I disclose. “I thought we’d hit on the important parts. What am I missing?”

  “I don’t want you on edge, quite the opposite actually.” He reaches for my hand, giving it a reassuring squeeze.

  Meeting my eyes, he tugs me until we’re leaning against his truck. His new truck, I might add. It’s a few years old, but the Chevrolet’s paint sparkles in the porch light as if it’s brand new, off the lot. He’d sold off his old truck with all of the back and forth driving he’s been doing. Nate wanted something reliable and safe for our daughter. I swear this man is swoon worthy. I had no idea he’d be such a great dad, I’m so happy that Sashy has someone else in her corner.

  “About the living arrangements; I’ve built my house with having a family in mind to share it with. Now I have a family with you and Natasha.”

  “Are you saying what I think you’re saying?” I ask, and swallow my nerves down. My hands move to my hips, not being confrontational, but rather, bracing myself for whatever is coming.

  Nate releases a pent-up breath. With a quick jerk of his head, he concedes. “I’m trying to ask you if you and Natasha would like to move in with me. Maybe make that new house into our home.”

  My throat feels tight, his words choking me up. Blinking a few times, I can’t hold the waterworks back. A few droplets escape, the warm salty water trailing down my cheeks. “You want us to be a family...permanently?” I question, caught off guard. He’s not proposing, but he’s asking us to live with him. That alone is a huge commitment he’s making to Sashy and me.

  “Of course I do. I’ve always wanted you Sunshine. When you left,...I-I was lost. I don’t ever want to feel that way again.”

  This man, his words, they crumble me inside. I’m partially responsible for making him feel like that, and that’s a terrible feeling. How on earth could he ever forgive me for what I’ve
done? If it were me, I’m not sure I would be able to.

  “I’m not sure, Nate. I mean, I know you’ve said you’re learning to forgive me. Do you think you’ve forgiven me enough to have a solid chance at a future if we live together so soon?”

  I can’t make any rash decisions. I have to think of our daughter and her well-being above all else. These past few months haven’t been crazy between us or anything, but they’ve been rocky enough to make me question it. Of course, I want to leap head first and say yes, but I won’t. It’s not only me in this decision.

  He leans in, his thumbs moving to my cheeks to lightly rub away the tears. “I’m positive that I love you, and I want us to live together, to be a family,” he reassures me.

  “I have to think about it. I’d need to talk it over with our daughter as well.”

  Nathan plants a heartfelt kiss on each of my cheeks, the tip of my nose, and lastly on my forehead. Then whispers, “Don’t think on it too hard, honey. We love each other, and we can be together. There’s no one stopping us anymore.”

  Nate

  I confessed my love, opening my heart up to Sunshine. I was honest and asked her to move in with me. Just as Shyla had suggested, I’d prayed long and hard on it before making peace with the decision to let my woman know exactly how I feel. It was going damn well, too until she told me she has to think it over about living together. To me, it’s cut and dried. We love each other, and we’re adults. What’s the problem? I want her to just let me fix whatever I can, so we can be a family like I want.

  Now, what am I supposed to do? I can’t just sit around and wait. Those trees Shyla had picked out? Yeah, they’ve been planted already. I couldn’t sleep the past few nights so I’ve come out and damn near dug to Texas it seems like. God knows I have the blisters to prove it.

  Fall’s in full swing, so I can’t do too much landscaping for fear of it all dying off. I need to find something to eat away the extra time. I’m bustling with thoughts that I need to drown out somehow. I haven’t really drunk since the summertime, and it’s cleared away so much from my mind. I know I don’t want to go down that road with this. It’s not the right answer.

  I do, however, want to hop in my truck and drive up to Sunshine’s house and demand she gives me an answer. I’m not going to do that, though. I’m attempting to be patient and give her the time she claims to need. On the upside, she hasn’t cut off contact completely. She’s texted me the past few days, and I’ve messaged her good-night each night. I don’t want her to think that just because she didn’t tell me yes or no right away, that I don’t want to talk to her. That’s not the case at all; if anything, I’ve missed her beautiful smile more than ever. The closer we get intimately, the more I want to be around her. That alone should be enough of an answer to her moving in.

  “You good, cousin?” Dallas casts me a weary glance. He’s not sure what to do or say with me like this.

  I’ve been banging the shit out of this front porch we’re currently working on. It shouldn’t be noisy at all really, as I’m placing a board where I want it and using the battery powered drill to insert the screw. However, I’m over here slamming the boards down and making the drill whine and strip screws. I’m so distracted with thoughts of Sunshine, I can’t be bothered to pay it much attention.

  “Just wish I knew what that woman’s thinking is all.”

  He nods and continues to brush stain on the pressure treated wood porch. He follows up with a quick swipe of an old T-shirt to remove any excess. “I’ve never understood women; reckon I won’t start anytime soon either.”

  “In this case, there shouldn’t be anything to understand.” I huff and drill another screw in place.

  “Have you tried thinking of it from her perspective?”

  I nod and move to the next board. We’ll run out of daylight soon enough, and I want to get as much completed as possible. Our games are over with, so my coaching schedule has freed up most of my evenings. I’ve been making some great progress because of it too.

  “All I’m saying is, she owns her house; she’s got a good paying job; Natasha’s been in the same school for a few years, and her parents are nearby.”

  It’s like his words finally make it all click in place for me. Of course, she’s anxious, I hadn’t even thought of everything like Dallas had pointed out. I’d be nervous as shit, too, and it’s not like she’s telling me flat out no, because she doesn’t love me or anything. She’s just being responsible about this decision, same as I’m trying to be with her making this place into our home.

  “Dallas, you’re a genius.”

  “Thought I was a dumbass. That’s what Clyde always says,” he mutters, and I crack my first grin at him all week.

  “You know my brother’s a grouch,” I reason and pull my cell from my pocket. There are no new messages, but I don’t let it deter me. Pulling up Sunshine’s name, I decided to let it all out again. I send her a text.

  Me: I’m IN LOVE with you.

  Me: I don’t love you like my sister...I love you like I want to marry you someday when you’re ready, and I want to have more babies with you kind of love. I don’t want you to feel like I’m putting you under pressure to move here. I get it.

  Me: You don’t have to sell your house. Keep it in case you ever feel like you need it, but just so we’re clear, I never plan on letting you go. If you’re going to miss your parents a lot, we’ll visit them every weekend. If you’re afraid to switch Natasha’s school, then keep her there. I’ll put in for a transfer or else you two can live here on the weekends. None of it is deal breakers. Where there’s an issue, we’ll figure out a way to make it work.

  Me: I meant what I said; I’m in this with you for good. I love you now and forever.

  Sunshine MY WOMAN Simmons: I’m IN love with you, too, Nathanial Owens.

  She doesn’t take it any further than that with her response. And you know what? I’m good with that. In fact, I’m fucking great. The woman I love loves me back, and I’m going to count it for what it is—a true blessing.

  ***

  The weekend finally arrives, and with it, comes my girls. My mouth drops, as I’m floored to watch Sunshine pull up in a moving truck rather than her Mercedes. Opening the passenger door, I help Natasha step down and give her a big hug. I round the truck to help Sunshine down next, wrapping her in a tight embrace.

  “Darlin?” I mumble into her hair, wondering if this is what I’ve been hoping for. I don’t want to be prematurely excited just in case. “You wanna tell me what’s going on?”

  Sunshine pulls back enough to meet my cautious stare. “The other day...when you texted me about the different ways we could be together?”

  I bob my head, quickly agreeing. I remember perfectly what I’d said, and I’d meant every word of it. Maybe the moving truck is here, for me.

  She goes on, saying, “I unenrolled Natasha from school. I got her transcripts and brought her home with me. We got some boxes, packed up the house together, and I rented a truck to bring it all down.”

  “Damn, honey. I’d have taken care of that stuff for you, so you didn’t have to stress.”

  She shakes her head. “I know you would’ve, but we needed to do it ourselves. It was our time to say good-bye to that life and to prepare for our new one here.”

  I’m beyond grateful, truly, but I have so many questions. “What about your job?”

  “I can work from home for the bulk of it. Once or twice a week, I’ll drive up to my office and use those days to see my clients and attend meetings.”

  “That’s a great plan. What about your parents?”

  “We can always visit, especially on the weekends. It was my father actually who put my mind at ease about it. He told me that he has my mom to grow old with and that I need to be with the person I want to spend my own life with as well. It made me realize that he was right. I was making up excuses, and I was done doing it where you and I are concerned.”

  “Smart man,” I comment. “W
hat about Natasha’s school?”

  She rolls her eyes. “Oh please, Nate. You know that girl wants to be here with her daddy, and especially to have you as her coach. I didn’t get to finish my sentence when I was trying to talk to her about it, and she’d raced to her room. When I asked her what she was doing, she said she was packing her stuff already.”

  I can’t help but chuckle as Natasha comes to stand beside us. She takes us both in, watching her mom wrapped snuggly in my arms. “There’s lots of room for a basketball court.” She points her thumb over her shoulder at the expanse of land toward the new house, not mentioning anything about her parents being so close. Maybe she’s good with the idea after all; I’d certainly hoped she would be.

  “Get Aunt Shyla to order you the basketball goal for your birthday gift, and I’ll have some concrete poured.”

  “It’s a deal.” She smiles widely, and we tug her in to be a part of our hug.

  We’ve got our own little huddle. It’s just the three of us, but if I have anything to say about it, we’ll be a family of four by the end of the year. “I love both my girls,” I murmur. I’m beyond grateful to have them here now and in the future.

  “We love you, Dad…” Natasha replies, and stares at Sunshine, “…both of us.”

  Sunshine nods, and just like that, my world’s never felt more complete.

  Sunshine

  Every day isn’t easy, but loving Nathan and Sashy is. Moving has been a transition, that’s for sure. Giving in and admitting that I share the same feelings as Nate was one of the most difficult decisions I’ve ever made. There was this massive chance that his affections could be fleeting and I’d end up with a broken heart, but I’ve come to learn to trust him. Falling in love with him all over again, was one of the easiest things I’ve done. In fact, I didn’t realize it was happening until it was too late.