Out of the Darkness: a Hope Valley novel
Page 20
I stayed motionless so long, holding my body so tight my muscles began to ache as that washed through me like acid in my veins.
“Just when I think you can’t possibly hurt me anymore than you already have, you go and prove me wrong,” I whispered. “You were right, Xander, you are toxic. In the past month you’ve made me feel great—”
“I—”
“Then in a flash, you turned around and made me feel like I was nothing. And I’m done. I learned a long time ago not to let people into my life who made me feel bad about myself. I made a mistake letting you in. Now I’m rectifying that.”
“Baby—”
“I wish I’d never met you,” I said on a broken whisper as my bottom lip quivered. “I wish you’d never come into my life, because you made me fall in love with you.”
His eyes grew red as he stared at the tears making tracks down my face.
“You’re one of the best men I’ve ever met, which sucks, because no one has ever been able to hurt me like you can. You’re letting those demons from your past destroy you, and I can’t let you take me down with you, Xander. I pray to god you’re able to overcome them one day, but I can’t be there when or if that ever happens.”
He remained stiff as I squeezed out from between him and the wall. I unlocked the door and pulled it open.
Fuck the coffee. I was just going to lock myself in my office for the rest of the day so I wouldn’t have to talk to anyone else and bury myself in work.
I’d almost made it when I heard a loud, rattling, booming voice shouting from the direction of reception. A voice that took the ground out from under me and righted my whole world all at the same time.
“Where’s my precious li’l bit?”
I turned slowly to look over my shoulder.
Then I ran.
Chapter Twenty-Five
Sage
I hit the reception area so fast I went into a skid, having to brace my hands on the wall to stop and keep from hitting the ground.
And right there, standing in the middle of the reception area, with a body and personality so damn big it felt like he took up the whole space, was the most important man in my whole world.
“Daddy.” It came out in a whisper so soft it was a wonder he could hear it. But I couldn’t find my voice. When those brown eyes hit me—eyes exactly like my own—and went soft, I had to take a step back. This was a dream. It was the only explanation. This wasn’t real. It couldn’t be.
“Haven’t gotten to hold my angel baby in eleven years, and the first time she sees me breathin’ free air since she was a kid, she stands a whole room away? What the fuck’s up with that, precious?”
That was when I realized it was real. It was very, very real. Only my dad would give me shit while standing there close to tears. As soon as it hit me, I moved. “Daddy!” I cried, shooting across the room faster than I’d ever moved before—cardio be damned—and threw myself right into him.
“My angel,” he whispered, his voice full of reverence. “Fuck me, but I missed this like you wouldn’t believe.”
The second his familiar scent and big strong arms surrounded me, lifting me off the ground and swinging me into a circle, I immediately burst into huge, loud, gut-wrenching sobs.
I felt him move as I clung to him like my life depended on it, burying my face in his neck. A second later he was down and I was sitting in his lap, my legs draped across his thighs as he held me just as close.
“Ah, don’t cry, sweet girl. Don’t cry. I got you, baby. I got you and I’m never lettin’ go.”
But I couldn’t stop. This was a dream come true. I’d been waiting for this moment every single day for the past eleven years, and now that it was here, I couldn’t get a hold of myself.
And that was all right. Because I had my dad back, and he’d do the holding. He’d hold me through this, keeping me safe and secure until I was finally able to pull myself together.
Several minutes passed before I finally forced myself to sit up straight so I could see him. I studied him closely, taking the time to mark every single inch of his face to memory, not that I needed to.
While I did that, Dad did the same, reaching up to drag a rough, calloused thumb along my cheek. “My girl, still as beautiful as ever. Been a looker from the moment the doc put you in my arms, and only got better from there.”
He gave me a smile that lit his whole face—well, as much of it as I could see over his thick, bushy beard. But it was still enough. My dad had always been handsome. Seriously handsome. And eleven years of hard time hadn’t changed that one bit.
To me, he’d always been bigger than life, standing six foot five with a big barrel chest, thick arms, and tree trunk-like thighs. He’d lived a life that included a lot of beer and some seriously good times, so it always surprised me how he stayed so damn strong, but somehow he did.
His stomach had gotten a tad softer with age, but it didn’t do one damn thing to detract from his looks. I’d gotten my thick mahogany hair from him, but I’d always thought the rich brown, streaked with undertones of russet looked better on him. Now his long hair and thick beard were streaked liberally with lines of gray, but if anything, it added even more character.
“Oh my god,” I cried once I was able to speak again. “How is this happening? When . . . what . . . how?” He’d been sentenced to fifteen years, and still had another four to go before he was supposed to be released, so while I was beside myself that he was here now, I didn’t understand how it was happening.
His rich, husky laugh soothed my soul. “Parole board decided to take pity on your old man and let me out early.”
My mouth dropped open as I let those words sink in. Then I reared back and socked him in his huge bicep as hard as I could. “Why didn’t you tell me?” I shouted, giving him another hit for good measure. “I could’ve been there when you got out!”
All that did was make him laugh even harder while grabbing my hand and holding it tight to keep me from landing another punch. “Calm, girl. I didn’t tell you ’cause I didn’t wanna get your hopes up in case it didn’t happen. And once it did, no way in hell I was seein’ my baby girl, free for the first time, outside a goddamn prison. You told me about this place. How beautiful it was and how much you loved it, so soon’s I could, I got my bike from Scooter, loaded up, and made the trek so I could surprise you. And I gotta say, precious, I see why you love this place so goddamn much. Beauty far’s the eye can see.”
I pulled in a breath, trying to wrap my head around all that was happening. “You’re really here?” I asked in a soft, quiet voice.
His voice wasn’t quiet, but it was soft as he confirmed, “I’m really here, angel.”
The sound of a throat clearing caught our attention, and when we both turned, I saw Linc had approached.
Daddy stood, taking me to my feet with him, and I noticed for the first time that he’d taken me over to one of the couches in the waiting area to sit.
“Lincoln Sheppard,” my boss said, offering his hand. “Pleased to meet you. Your girl here’s said wonderful things about you.”
“Judge Winthrop,” Dad replied, taking Linc’s hand and giving it a shake before letting go and looping that arm around my shoulders. “My Sage has mentioned you, so I know this is your operation here. Pleasure’s all mine, seein’ as you gave my girl a shot and a steady paycheck so she could set herself up.”
He wasn’t lying. I might not have been able to see my dad nearly as much as I wanted, but we wrote letters constantly and he called as much as he could with his seriously limited phone time.
“No thanks necessary. Hand to God, we were drownin’ before her. She came in and helped right the ship, takin’ on all the paperwork we hate and then some.” His gaze cut to mine, his expression full of meaning as he said, “Now that we got her, don’t think we’d be able to function if she left.”
Damn him. That was his subtle way of letting me know he wasn’t planning to accept my resignation. That was another bat
tle I’d have to fight, but it wasn’t for now.
Dad looked down at me with pride shining in his deep brown eyes. “That’s my girl. Always had a stellar work ethic. Don’t know where it came from.”
He wasn’t lying about that either. My mom had never worked a day in her life. Dad did, and he earned well enough to take care of us so we could live comfortably, and he did that by bouncing from place to place. He’d start somewhere, get antsy, decide it was time to move on, and do just that. Fortunately, he never left one job until he had another lined up, and he always made sure the pay was equal or better. He took pride in taking care of his girls and wouldn’t ever jeopardize that, but my dad got bored easily.
I noticed then that we had company. They’d undoubtedly heard my dad’s booming voice and my sobs, which pulled them to the front to investigate.
“Daddy, I want you to meet some of the guys,” I said, taking his attention from Linc. I made quick work of introducing him to Marco, Cord, Hunter, West, Bryce, and even Xander.
“Guys, this is my dad, Judge Winthrop.”
They’d heard him mention a parole board and getting out early, but they were good guys. They’d seen Linc’s easy acceptance of him and how happy I was, and didn’t let the fact he was an ex-convict cast a pall over their first meeting. With the exception of Xander who’d stayed back from everyone, they all greeted him as they would anyone, and I loved them all even more for it.
“Fuck me, girl,” Dad said, turning in my direction. “Told me you worked for a private investigation and securities firm, but didn’t say you worked with a buncha commando-lookin’ motherfuckers big enough to snap a goddamn tree with their bare hands.”
“That’s kinda the pot callin’ the kettle black there, wouldn’t you say?” Hunter asked. My dad looked like an older, slightly more weathered version of all these guys, just as big and strong. In fact, the only one bigger than him was Xander, and that was only by an inch and maybe a couple pounds of muscle.
“Don’t let it fool you,” Cord spoke. “Sage runs this place with an iron fist. Only one we’re more scared of is Rox.”
I let out a little jump of excitement and grabbed Dad’s hand. “Speaking of Rox . . .” I dragged him toward the reception desk so I could introduce my favorite guy to one of my favorite ladies. “Roxanne, meet my dad. Dad, this is Rox. She’s one of my favorite people in the world and is the one who actually hired me, so all the credit really should go to her.”
“’Course it should,” Roxanne replied with her usual brand of sass. “I’m smart as a whip and have excellent taste. Nice to meet ya, Judge.”
When my father didn’t speak in return, I glanced up to see why, and found him staring down at Roxanne with an expression on his face no daughter should ever see coming from her father.
I took a few seconds to be grossed out before it hit me. My dad had been loyal to his core to my mom—even though she didn’t deserve it—so I’d never seen him so much as look at another woman. But if I had to think of someone who’d fit my rough and tumble, rowdy biker of a dad, it would definitely be Roxanne. She was brash, coarse, and you either took her how she was or fucked off. Her whole look and personality screamed, badass biker babe. All of that with a big, generous heart and the same brand of loyalty. Not to mention, as I took them in I noticed they’d actually look really freaking cute together, and I suddenly felt the crazy need to play matchmaker.
Then my dad did something I’d never seen him do before. Giving Roxanne a wink, he reached across the ledge of her desk, took her hand, and pressed a kiss to her knuckles before murmuring in a low, raspy voice full of seduction, “And this town just keeps gettin’ better and better. Pleased to meet ya, beautiful.”
My head whipped in Roxanne’s direction just in time to see her cheeks flush pink and her eyelids drop to half-mast.
“Oh fuck me,” I heard grunted from behind us, and when I turned I saw it came from a disturbed-looking West. “Did Rox just go all girly?”
To that, the Roxanne I knew and loved snapped back into place. “If I did, it wouldn’t be any of your damn business. I suggest you all move along before you piss me off.”
Chuckles bounded around the room from the guys as they broke off and started back to wherever they’d come from. The reception area slowly cleared out, leaving me, Dad, Rox, Linc, and surprisingly, Xander.
I’d done everything I could to avoid looking at him, but that didn’t mean I hadn’t felt his eyes on me like a brand on my skin this whole time.
“Sage, sweetheart, take the rest of the day,” Linc ordered. “Catch up with your old man, show him around. We got things covered here for the time bein’.”
“But what about the staff meeting?”
It wasn’t a birthday week, but there was usually something important discussed in those meetings that I needed to hear.
“Like I said, we got it. Anything you need to know, we can fill you in on later. You don’t come back here ’til Monday, hear me?”
Oh, I heard him, all right. I also read the look on his face loud and clear. It said I had today and this weekend with my dad. And if I didn’t have my ass in my office come Monday, he’d track me down and physically put me there. He really wasn’t going to accept my resignation.
On his order, I told my dad to wait while I went to grab my stuff. As I was moving back down the hallway Xander was coming my way, heading back to the control room.
I kept my eyes straight ahead, determined to keep walking without acknowledging him, but he had other plans.
Coming to a stop directly in front of me, he took me by the forearms and leaned in, pressing his lips against my forehead as he muttered, “Had no business sayin’ what I said about your old man, and I feel like shit for it. Happy for you, Shortcake. Seriously fuckin’ happy you have him back.”
Then he let me go, stepped around me, and went on his way, leaving me rattled to my core.
Chapter Twenty-Six
Sage
After doing my best to shake off the aftereffects of Xander’s sweet words and that tender kiss, I informed my dad I was taking him to Muffin Top for the best pastries and coffee he’d ever had.
One bite into a chocolate muffin loaded with chocolate chips and walnuts—in other words, a brownie in muffin form—and a sip of coffee, he was hooked just like me.
I’d introduced him to Danika as the owner and my Hope Valley BFF, and he didn’t hesitate to let her know she had a new customer for life.
“You got a gift, sweetheart. Like a good cuppa joe. Not as much as my girl, but for this”—he picked up his cup and gave it a little shake—“I’d gladly start an addiction.”
Just like Roxanne, Danika immediately swooned after my father, blushing and mumbling her thanks at his praise before taking off to deal with other customers.
While we sipped coffee he filled me in on how his crew back in Redemption was doing. I hadn’t been able to see any of them because my mom ripped me from my home, but since his buds were all still there, and they’d been tight as brothers before he went in, they came to visit him regularly.
I’d grown up with Scooter, Banks, Fletch, and Danno, and each of them had treated me like I was as much their little girl as I was Judge Winthrop’s. Hell, I’d been so close with all of them that Banks’s son Cannon, who I’d grown up with since as far back as I could remember, had been my boyfriend from the time I turned thirteen until my mother took me away from the only home I’d ever had. So hearing they were all still good made me smile.
Scooter had kept my dad’s bike while he was away, riding it occasionally and keeping up with the fluids so it would be good to go the second my dad got out. Banks’s wife sent Dad care packages. Danno and Fletch handled selling the house we’d lived in, keeping the money in an account my mom couldn’t touch so Dad would have a little something when the time came to start his life again.
They’d all treated Lorelei Winthrop like gold. Until she proved herself to be a cold, heartless bitch by having my father ser
ved with divorce papers in jail and taking me away from him only days after his arrest.
As far as they were concerned—and I agreed wholeheartedly—she’d fucked him over, and they weren’t going to give her a chance to do anything worse. The house had belonged to Dad, had been in his family for generations, and they’d seen to it that Lorelei didn’t get a penny of what wasn’t hers to claim.
This was a serious bone of contention with my mom. For years I had to listen to her slander those men, insisting they’d turned their back on her when we’d needed them the most.
But I was Judge’s daughter, which meant I had a brain in my head and I knew how to use it. She’d cut off any contact between me and my family in Tennessee, but that didn’t matter. I knew those men, and I knew in my bones that she was the one in the wrong.
He’d lost his wife and access to his daughter, but my dad still had his boys and all who came with them, his family, and I thanked God for that.
The only reason I hadn’t returned to Redemption when I finally bailed on Arizona was because the memories made it too hard. I saw my dad in everything, but not physically having him with me hurt too much. I needed somewhere new that was just mine.
After coffee, I took him to The Tap Room. It was barely past lunch, but I wanted to have a beer with my old man and let him meet Rory and her folks, Bill and Becky Hightower—who were a freaking hoot together.
We swung by the diner after that, where I introduced Ralph and Sally to the man who’d created and nurtured my love of motorcycles. Needless to say, Dad and Ralph hit it off in a really big way. And Sally was just happy I was happy.
From there, I took him a couple places so he could see a few of the sights Hope Valley had to offer. He’d been proud as hell of how I’d kept up my ride, and as I took him around town, I basked at having him in the seat beside me.