Worth The Fight
Page 13
I'm in a fit of tears by the time Sasha and Kevin make their official entrance, being announced as husband and wife for the first time. Laughter turns to cheers for the happy couple, my heart lighter than it's felt all day.
As our dinner plates are cleared and the DJ turns the volume up a notch, my phone vibrates on the table. Everyone I talk to is here tonight with the exception of Liam's parents. Sharing a confused look with him, he reaches for my phone, but I pull it toward me before he can get to it, hugging it to my chest.
"Don't," he warns, his voice filled with concern.
"It's probably your mom. She has been trying to get me to have lunch with her all week."
"You and I both know it's not my mom. She knows we're here tonight, and she wouldn't bother you. Let me have your phone, Cass."
In my heart, I know he's right.
Still, I have to know.
Setting my phone on the table in between us, I slide my finger across the screen to reveal a waiting text from Kendra. Liam and I both stare at my phone but neither of us moves to open the message.
"She's not worth it," Aaron states. "It's a group message, and it's a bunch of bullshit. If you want to read it, do it later. She's just trying to get under your skin."
His eyes are focused on his phone, and then he begins typing.
"If she's not worth it, why are you texting her back?"
"Because I have jokes for days," he snickers as he continues to type.
He lays his phone on the table after he presses send and my phone vibrates again, the screen having gone dark in the meantime. I don't bother to read what either of them wrote, opting to put my phone in my purse for the remainder of the night.
I'll read the messages tomorrow.
"Shall we dance?" Liam asks, pushing his chair away from the table and offering me his hand as he stands.
"To this?"
The DJ has been playing a hot mess of fast songs for the last hour. If he were to slow it down, I'd be more than happy to twirl around the dance floor with Liam. But this music screams dirty dancing and that will get us in trouble.
Judging by the grin on his face, he's aware of that fact.
He doesn't wait for my answer. He pulls me from my chair and onto the dance floor, immediately holding me close and moving our bodies. I can feel people watching us. Judging us for the way we're dancing. I'm about to pull away and run when the song changes and a sweet melody begins pouring from the speakers.
The change in song sparks a movement. Other couples join us on the dance floor, and Liam leads us to the center of the masses.
"Is this better?" he asks as he adjusts our stance and we begin swaying to the music.
"Depends. Are people still staring at us?" I ask, unwilling to look at the small crowds of people gathered around the room.
"If they are, it's because you look so beautiful tonight."
"I'm pretty sure it was the way you were pressing your pelvis against me that caught their attention. Not my outfit."
"If you say so."
Resting my head against his chest, I allow Liam to lead us around the dance floor for two songs with my eyes closed. I picture us in my head. The way he's protectively wrapped his arms around my waist. The navy of his shirt against the deep burgundy of my dress, the colors complimenting each other nicely.
Then I step on his foot.
My heel digging into his toes.
He doesn't even falter.
"I'm sorry," I say, pulling away from his chest to find him smiling down at me.
"I told you not to wear those heels tonight. They were going to get you in trouble."
"Hey, I've mastered walking in these things. It wasn't easy either. You try adding three inches to your height and not feeling like you're about to topple over."
"And here I thought you wore them so you were closer to my lips," he replies, bending and placing a gentle kiss on my cheek. "That's the real reason, isn't it, Cass?"
Another kiss, this one to my temple.
"Admit it. You want me to kiss you right now."
"Liam, people are watching. We talked about this."
"You said no kissing. I haven't technically kissed you. Yet."
Nibbling on my ear lobe, I feel my knees threaten to give out and focus on staying upright. Falling on my ass would attract everyone's attention.
"Liam, you're treading on thin ice." My warning does nothing to sway him as he continues to suck on my ear lobe.
"It is getting hot in here, isn't it?"
I don't think it's the room causing the flush in my cheeks.
"You're killing me. We agreed to no PDA tonight."
"I know but then you wore those shoes," he whispers, his lips moving to the nape of my neck. "And that dress. And now I want to take you home and find out what else you have on."
Tilting my head back so he has better access, I close my eyes but not before catching a glimpse of the bride and groom smirking at us. As soon as it registers, I snap my head forward, my chin crashing against Liam's cheek.
"You okay?" he asks, rubbing his cheek. Nodding, I wrinkle my nose and tilt my head toward the head table. Liam doesn't bother to look, only smiles.
"You really are killing me, you know that?" I ask, attempting to wiggle out of his hold to no avail.
"I'm going to kiss you, Cass. Because I don't care who sees. I don't care who knows. I'm not ashamed of us—"
"Neither am I."
"Good. Because I think the entire world should know how much I love you. One kiss isn't going to show them, but it's a start," he continues, moving closer to my lips with every word.
And then it happens.
And the entire room and everyone in it disappears.
The only people who matter are us. The only thing that matters is the way he makes me feel.
And all I feel is pure bliss in this moment.
Until I hear cheering.
And the room comes crashing in around us.
Crossing the threshold into our apartment, I've never felt such a sense of relief. I tried to hide from everyone, spending twenty minutes in the bathroom after I ran off the dance floor, but it didn't work.
People wanted to congratulate us. To say how happy they were that we finally were together.
Finally, huh?
Am I the only person who was clueless as to how in love with me Liam was?
I'm not a stupid person. I consider myself very aware of what's happening around me. Not much gets past me. It's one of the things I pride myself on, especially in the classroom.
But this . . . this I didn't see coming.
I didn't see it at all.
Not only his feelings for me but mine for him.
Was I repressing them all this time?
That can't be it. If I were, wouldn't thoughts of him as more than a friend at least have crossed my mind?
Regardless, I feel like I've run into a brick wall. One that was built in front of me when I wasn't paying attention. Everyone had a hand in building it, even Garrett and Kendra, except me.
I should be upset by the fact the people closest to me saw how he felt but never informed me. That no one clued me in to the situation. I can't, though.
In my heart, I know if someone had tried to tell me, I would have brushed them off. Laughed in their face. Called them crazy.
"So," Liam says, pulling me from my thoughts as he wraps his arms around my waist and pulls me back against his chest. "Did you have a good time tonight?"
Rolling my eyes even though I know he can't see me, I reply, "You know I did."
"And you're not mad at me for breaking your rule?"
"Mad? No. Wishing we had at least told your parents first? Yes."
"You think I haven't told my parents?"
Spinning in his arms, I raise an eyebrow at him in challenge. If he told his parents, his mother would have said something to me one of the three times I spoke with her this week.
"I told them after the first night we kissed, Cass. They
couldn't be happier."
"But," I protest.
"But what?"
"Things were up in the air. I didn't know what I wanted. I ran away from you, Liam!"
Why I'm screaming at him, I have no idea. I'm not upset he told his parents. I'm actually relieved. I didn't want to be the one to break the news to them. I was worried they wouldn't approve. After all, I'm like a daughter to them. They took me in after my parents died. They've watched out for me ever since.
So has Liam.
And that's when it clicks.
"How long?" I ask.
"How long, what?"
"How long have you been in love with me, Liam? How long have you been hiding your feelings?"
Releasing his hold on me, he tries to step back, but I pull him to me, wrapping my arms around his neck. "Tell me, please."
He opens his mouth to speak but hesitates. Tilting my head to the side, I beg him with my eyes to be honest with me. Staring deep into my soul, I can feel the moment he breaks.
"Since we were fifteen," he finally says.
Eleven years.
Never once did he say or do anything that made me think he wanted to be anything other than friends.
"You've loved me that long?"
"I've loved you since day one, Cass. I only realized what I was feeling for you our sophomore year. Maybe it was puberty, or maybe it was because you had your first date. Something inside me snapped that fall, and I realized what it was. My dad and I went fishing one weekend, and it's like he knew what was going on in my head. He asked about you, and I told him everything."
"Why didn't you tell me?" My hands fall to my sides as I take a step away from him in an attempt to process everything he's telling me.
"For the same reason you ran last weekend. I didn't want to lose you. It was my greatest fear. I knew you'd always be a part of my life if we stayed friends, and so I decided I'd shove my feelings down and keep my feelings hidden as long as I could.
"That's why I sent Sasha to get you and I didn't come myself. I knew what was going through your head. I knew how strong the fear was. If I'd shown up, you wouldn't have been able to think straight. You needed time to weigh the good and the bad. We're not kids anymore, Cass. This is real. It's not a high school crush."
That's about as close to the truth as you can get. This isn't small-time romance. This could be life altering. Good or bad.
"Everything I've done has been to keep you close. College. Moving home. I wouldn't have done any of that if it meant losing you. I was ready to finally tell you, to see if there was any interest on your part, and then you reconnected with Garrett. You fell back in love with him so easily I thought I'd lost my one shot. But when he started fucking around with Kendra—"
Liam stops short, his eyes growing wide. I heard what he said. What his words insinuated. I don't give a shit. I need to hear this. I want to know everything he knows.
"When…" I let my voice trail off, hoping he'll continue.
"He had just proposed to you, and I was running surveillance on Kendra's neighborhood. There had been a string of break-ins, and I was filling in for the local investigator while he was on vacation. I caught him walking out of her apartment building one afternoon, tucking his shirt back in. I didn't think anything about it until she walked out on her balcony in a nightgown and blew him a kiss. I put the pieces together pretty quickly after that and followed him for a week. He visited her every day at the same time. I finally confronted him, and it took all I had not to beat the shit out of him.
"He swore he wouldn't see her anymore. That he would be honest with you, but I knew that wouldn't happen. I wanted to tell you, Cass. I really did. But the day I stopped over to tell you, Kendra was there. You looked so happy. You two were close, and I knew this would break you in a way I wasn't sure I was prepared for. I drove straight to my parents’ house to talk to my dad after that. The more I told him, the angrier I got. But it wasn't anger that was pouring from me, it was jealousy.
"I was jealous that he had you and I didn't. Jealous that you were marrying him when I wanted to be the one you spent the rest of your life with. He didn't deserve you. Not then. Not in high school. I also couldn't be the one to break you up because it wouldn't be for the right reasons. So I watched him, and he stayed true to his word. I didn't catch him at her place again. It was enough of a reason to bite my tongue."
He knew. For almost a year.
And he was prepared to let me marry Garrett because he was afraid to break me.
Chapter Sixteen
"I forgive you," I find myself saying before the words even register.
"What?"
"Everything you've ever done has come from a place of love. It's been to protect me. This is no different. Would I have liked to know? Of course. It would have saved me a world of hurt. But not knowing, finding out the way I did, that's what led me here. That's what brought us to this place. If you had been the one to tell me, there's no guarantee we'd be standing here right now.
"I could be angry at you. I could blame you. I don't want to. Garrett and Kendra are the ones that did this to me. They're the ones that deserve the blame. One day, I'll probably thank them for being the assholes they are. Because if they hadn't been, I wouldn't have you. There wouldn't be an us. People wouldn't be whispering about how cute we are together. And how it's about time we're a couple."
Liam laughs as I roll my eyes, repeating all the statements we heard earlier over and over again from friends and family.
"I'm choosing not to be angry, Liam. I'm choosing happiness. In this moment. With you. Let's leave the past in the past where it belongs and focus on the road ahead."
His lips are on mine, demanding and hungry, a complete contradiction to the gentle way he's cradling my face in his hands. But that's Liam. A man who knows what he wants, and isn't afraid to take it, but is still sweet and caring on the inside.
Slowing the pace of the kiss, I take a step backward and he matches me the way I hoped he would, not allowing our lips to disconnect. Walking us all the way into the living room and spinning us around, Liam's hands make their way to my hips as he takes a seat on the couch, pulling me to sit on top of him.
The hem of my dress gets caught in my heel as I straddle him, and I fall forward, our foreheads crashing together and our lips parting.
"Are you trying to kill me, Cass?" he jokes as he helps me regain my balance and free my heel from the fabric. I hear the rip of material and look over my shoulder to see a gaping hole with my heel still through it.
"Couldn't save the dress, could you?"
"I'd rather save the heels," he remarks, unclasping them one by one.
"Why are you taking them off if you like them so much?" I ask as I reposition myself so he can reach them better. The most sensitive part of my body brushes against the bulge in his pants, and my breath catches in my throat.
"Don't worry. I have plans for these. Later. When there's no chance of you hurting yourself."
"That sounds kinky."
The first shoe falls, and Liam's hands pause, the clasp of the second shoe partially undone.
"How so?" His face has turned serious, his eyes growing wide with concern at my statement.
"Depends what you're picturing."
A slow smirk begins to spread across Liam's face as he undoes my other shoe and lets it fall to the floor.
"You. In those heels and nothing else."
"That's your fantasy?"
"You're my fantasy. Right now. In this dress. Later in those heels. Tonight as I hold you while you sleep. Tomorrow morning in my t-shirt, sipping coffee at the kitchen table with a lopsided ponytail. Your knees pulled up to your chin while you try and wake up."
Talk about melting a girl's heart.
Liam's always been a sweet talker. There's a reason women fall at his feet. It's partially because of his striking good looks but also the words that fall from his lips.
He leaves an impression on your heart to say the least.
"Eleven years," I whisper.
"I know it's a long time, Cass. I know I should have spoken up sooner, but I'm just glad we're here now."
"No. Eleven years ago, I should have seen it."
"I was pretty good at hiding my feelings. There's no reason you would have suspected anything. Hell, I think I was in denial for a while. Fear is a powerful emotion, and the fear of losing you often outweighed how much I loved you."
"But I did know. You told me."
The memories of that night are rushing back. The way he held me. The words he said when he thought I was asleep. The feelings that blossomed inside me.
"What are you talking about?" he asks, confusion causing a defined wrinkle to appear across his forehead.
"Spring Break. Junior year. We stayed in that beach house for the week. Our parents said we could each bring a friend, but we didn't. It was just you and me for a week. We spent our days with our toes in the sand and our nights counting stars. The last night we were there, you found a way to sneak a bottle of vodka outside, and we sat on the beach drinking until we both fell asleep."
Liam smiles at the memory of our vacation. Our parents had no idea where we were. We both got in trouble the next morning when they found us fast asleep on a beach towel. It was the only time we were grounded in our lives. If we had hidden the empty vodka bottle, we probably wouldn't have gotten in as much trouble.
"I remember closing my eyes and listening to the waves crash against the shore. We had laid down. I had my head on your chest, and you were running your hand up and down my back the way you always used to do. You asked me if I was still awake, and I didn't answer you. I knew you wouldn't go to sleep until I did. A few minutes later, you pulled me close, wrapped both of your arms around me, and kissed me on the top of my head. You told me you loved me and that you'd always love me.