From Port to Rigor Morte

by J. C. Eaton

  “Can you tell if he was shot or stabbed? Bludgeoned or beaten? Poisoned maybe?” I asked.

  “I’m not the coroner,” Theo announced. “But the guy’s clothes are torn and rumpled. And the body looks kind of bluish and bruised. He’s on his side and I don’t want to look at his face.”

  “Okay. Don’t look, but I’m going to walk over to you and you can take photos of it. We might need them.”

  “What?? Why would we need them? And why can’t you take the photos?”

  “Because I don’t want to look at a decaying corpse and because something always happens when I wind up investigating a murder.”

  “You mean interfering with a sheriff’s investigation.”

  “You sound like Deputy Hickman.”

  “Yeah, well, speaking of which, maybe now would be a good time for you to give him a call.”

  “Maybe I can simply shoot off a text and we can get the heck out of here. Honestly, I was certain those kids spied a giant log with moss or something.”

  “You and me both. So, who wants to make the call?”

  Chapter 4

  “I will. This was my idea, after all. Hold on, I’m dialing nine-one-one.” My fingers all but flew over the numbers on the screen. “This is Norrie Ellington,” I said, “and I’m calling to report a dead body across the road from Lake View Winery. It’s in the wooded bushy area about fifty or sixty yards from where my car is parked. A Toyota. Only you can’t go in straight. You have to take a footpath past the rocks.” By now I was babbling and the 911 operator interrupted me. “I need your exact location, ma’am. What city, street, or road?”

  Ma’am? Was she insane? Ma’am? That’s for middle-aged women.

  “I’m on Route 14 in Penn Yan, across from Lake View Winery. I don’t have their exact address.”

  “Okay. Stay on the line and we’ll send someone out. Is anyone injured?”

  “No. Dead.”

  “Are you in any danger?”

  “No. I’m fine.” If you can call coming across a dead body covered in flies, fine.

  “Remain where you are. The deputies are en route.”

  “Okay, good. I don’t need to stay on the line. I’ll wait.”

  Before she could answer I ended the call. “I’ve got to call Catherine. She’ll go berserk if she hears sirens and sees a sheriff’s car.”

  Theo nodded. “Good idea.”

  “I’ll hold the phone out so you can hear.”

  Berserk was an understatement. Catherine went nuclear. “OH NO! NOT A DEAD BODY! OH MY GOODNESS! ON MY PROPERTY NO LESS! A DEAD BODY!”

  I took a slow breath and spoke even slower. “Try to stay calm. I called nine-one-one and they’re on their way.”

  “What should I do? Oh my goodness!”

  “Um, nothing right now. There’s nothing you can do. I’m sure Deputy Hickman will speak with you once they, um, well, cordon off the area and investigate the situation.”

  Catherine all but shrieked in my ear, “The situation? What situation? How many bodies are there?”

  Theo tried not to laugh but I could tell it was tough.

  “Um, only the one.”

  “Do you know who it is?”

  “Of course not.” But as soon as I said that, I had an idea. “Catherine, I need to go. Stay calm and wait until someone from the Yates County Sheriff’s Office gets to your winery.”

  “Of all weekends for my husband to be visiting his mother in Plattsburgh. I’m calling Steven. He’ll know what to do.”

  “Yes. Call Steven. Bye.” Then I looked at Theo. “Quick! Before that forensic crew gets here, see if you can maybe reach in the guy’s pocket and pull out a wallet. It’ll save us time in the long run.”

  “It’ll save us time, all right, but it’ll wipe us out in legal costs. And since when are we the investigating detectives?”

  “You know how they say possession is nine-tenths of the law? Well, maybe first dibs on a crime scene gives us similar rights.”

  “It doesn’t.”

  “Come on. One fast look. And don’t worry about fingerprints. You can use this old Ziploc bag I’ve got. I had some of Charlie’s treats in it from when I had to take him to the vet for his shots.”

  “You carry a Ziploc bag in your pocket?”

  I shrugged. “Not my first rodeo.”

  Theo groaned and took the bag. “It’s not going to be that easy. The guy is wearing cargo shorts. They have a zillion pockets and I’m not about to roll him over.”

  Much as I didn’t want to, I looked at the body. The man appeared to be in his forties or fifties, thin and with a full head of dark hair. Had he been standing I would have used the word lanky to describe him. But sprawled out on the ground, the splotches of dried blood and dirt dominated his body. Not to mention the bluish bruises that matched his polo shirt. From what I could discern from the side of his face, it looked as if he needed a shave. That image, in combination with the sickening flies and the dried blood, made me queasy.

  “Don’t think about it. Pat the pockets and see if you can find a wallet or cell phone.”

  Theo bent over the corpse and turned his head toward me. “You are so going to owe me for this one.”

  I watched as he gingerly tapped the pockets with the Ziploc bag.

  “Nothing. Those pockets are empty. Now, are you satisfied?”

  “The guy’s really thin. Maybe you can give the body a slight push and—”

  “Forget it. The body stays where it is.”

  For a moment I lost sight of all reason and gave the body a slight nudge with my foot. It moved just enough for us to see the other two pockets.

  “You’re unbelievable,” Theo exclaimed. “And a bit scary, I might add.”

  “Quick! Before the deputies get here. Check out those pockets.”

  Again Theo tapped them with the Ziploc bag. “Empty. Whoever dumped him here, and I say dumped him because he sure as hell didn’t walk, must have emptied the pockets.” Then he paused and looked around.

  “What? What’s the matter?”

  “I’m no medical examiner, but my money’s on a hit-and-run. Look at the ground to your left. Those are drag marks. They lead directly to the road. Someone didn’t waste time cutting across the rocks and using a footpath. They went straight for the woods.”

  “Oh, wow! Maybe that was the fender bender Catherine mentioned. She said it was the other day. But what other day? Yesterday? The day before?”

  By now Theo had moved a good two or three yards from the body. “I think it might be more recent. I mean, with the flies buzzing around and all. If it was a day or two ago, wouldn’t there be maggots on the guy?”

  “Only one way to find out. Give me a second.” I pulled out my phone and dialed Godfrey at the Experiment Station. “I’m putting this on speaker phone so you can listen, too.”

  Theo rolled his eyes while I waited for Godfrey to answer.

  “Hey, Norrie, I didn’t expect to hear from you so soon. I’ve got to be at a meeting so I don’t have much time.”

  “No problem. This will be quick. How long before flies on a dead body turn into maggots?”

  “I hope this is a theoretical question as opposed to, well, never mind. In a nutshell, the Calliphoridae, better known as the blowfly, lays eggs two days after death. Very interesting species, I might add. It’s attracted to the body fluids and gases that emanate from a dead body. The eggs of course turn into larvae and start consuming the flesh. That usually takes about a week. Why do you need to know this?”

  “Because Theo and I are looking at a dead body with flies buzzing all over it.”

  “Where? What dead body?”

  “I thought you had to get to a meeting.”

  “I do. So talk fast.”

  I gave Godfrey the rundown beginning with Eli and Stuart’s appearance at Two Witches and culminating with the current situation.

  “Whatever you do, Norrie, don’t touch the body. Step away from it and wait for the sheriff’s depu
ties. Those flies carry diseases like crazy. The good news is that the stages of larvae development can indicate how long the body has been in rigor mortis. Forensic entomologists use that knowledge to assist with criminal investigations.”

  As soon as Theo heard the words Don’t touch the body, he moved another three or four yards back and shouted, “Ask Godfrey if I need to be worried. I was on top of the body with the stupid Ziploc bag thanks to you.”

  “I heard that,” Godfrey said. “Tell Theo he’ll probably be fine. What was he doing with a Ziploc bag? Oh my gosh. I’ll be late. Call me later. By the way, the body couldn’t have been there for more than a day or it would be besieged with flesh flies followed by the dermestid beetles. Like I said—call me.”

  With that, the call ended and I gave Theo a shrug. “Like Godfrey said, I’m sure you’re fine.”

  “Maybe we should walk back to the spot where the footpath goes into the wooded area. That way we’ll see the sheriff’s car pull up. The foliage is too dense in here to see the road from where we are.”

  “Shh. Listen. Those are sirens. The woods may be dense but the sound carries. And yeah, let’s wait where the footpath begins.”

  If I thought the sound of sirens was loud, it was nothing compared to the bellow that reached my ears the minute Deputy Hickman spotted Theo and me by the opening to the woods.

  “Miss Ellington! I prayed the nine-one-one operator got it wrong and it wasn’t you who placed the call, but I should have known better.”

  He thundered over to where Theo and I stood, leaving a dazed assistant deputy in his wake. With tousled blond hair and a baby face, the assistant looked more like a high school sophomore than a member of the Yates County Sheriff’s Office. As soon as the young deputy realized what had happened, he charged toward us, huffing and puffing until he finally caught his breath.

  Yep, Grizzly Gary Hickman was in better physical shape than any of us. He turned to the deputy, pointed to the notepad the guy had in his hand and directed him to start writing. Then he looked at me. “From the beginning. And don’t leave out anything.”

  Then he looked at Theo and sighed. “This is becoming a habit with you, too, Mr. Buchman. Don’t those wineries keep you busy enough?”

  Theo started to answer but Deputy Hickman was quick on the draw. “It was a rhetorical question.” Then back to me. “I’m waiting, Miss Ellington.”

  Me too. For Francine and Jason to get home so I can get the heck out of here.

  Chapter 5

  With his arms crossed in front of his chest and his shoulders squared, Deputy Hickman looked like a brigadier general about to launch a military campaign.

  I winced and looked behind me at the bushy woods. “To be honest, I didn’t really think there would be a dead body but I had to find out for myself.”

  Grizzly Gary didn’t move a muscle. “You’ve lost me. Perhaps you should begin with the simple five Ws. As a screenwriter, I’m sure you’re familiar with them.”

  I sighed. “Fine. Here goes. Who—Eli Speltmore, the son of our wine trail president, and his little buddy Stuart. What—They thought they saw a dead body in the woods. When—Earlier today. Where—I already said. The woods across from Lake View Winery. Why—The boys are only eleven or twelve and shouldn’t have been there so they were too scared to tell their parents. Oh, and How. The five Ws also include an H.”

  “All right. An H. How did you come about to assist Eli Speltmore? He’s not exactly in your circle of friends and acquaintances.”

  I gave Deputy Hickman the complete history about Eli and his tagging. Then I filled in the blanks about the body. “So you see,” I said, “I couldn’t very well call your office and tell you there was a dead body somewhere in the woods without actually having seen it for myself. And I wasn’t going to go alone.”

  The deputy looked at Theo before turning to face his assistant. “Get this all down, Clarence.”

  “The body is fairly deep in those woods. Theo and I used the center footpath but all the footpaths merge so it really doesn’t matter. It’s a male. Forties or fifties. Maybe a hit-and-run. The bruising would support that. And Theo thinks the body might have been dragged from the road because—”

  “Enough, Miss Ellington. I’ve summoned a forensic team and they should be here any minute. They will make a preliminary determination. Now, will you please show us the way?”

  I motioned for Theo to go first and followed right behind. Deputy Hickman was on my heels and that poor assistant deputy was, well, pulling up the rear. And not figuratively.

  The activity from the flies seemed to have intensified in the past half hour, making it easier to spot the body this time.

  “That’s it,” I said. “With the flies swarming around. That means the body hasn’t been here all that long. I mean, it’s not as if the flies had time to lay their eggs and have their larvae start eating the flesh.”

  “Did you want me to get that down on paper as well, Deputy Hickman?” the younger deputy asked.

  “No!” With that he took a step closer to me. “Please reserve your speculation for your screenplays. Time of death will be determined by the coroner. Now, I suggest you and Mr. Buchman wait over there by that mound of rocks until the forensic team arrives. And whatever you do, Miss Ellington, do not share this information with anyone. Understood?”

  “Uh, I already told Catherine Trobert since this is her property.”

  “Dear God, no! Not Mrs. Trobert. She’s probably on the phone now calling all of the other women in that winery klatch of yours.”

  Deputy Hickman then leaned over the body and began to hum. Theo and I didn’t say a word as we waited for the forensic crew to arrive. It was only a few minutes but it seemed like an eternity.

  A series of crunching noises and shuffling followed by someone shouting, “You over there, Gary?” left no doubt the lab guys had made their way into the woods.

  Then Deputy Hickman’s voice, “Ten yards ahead and watch out for the thorny bushes.”

  I caught the movement in the woods before I actually saw two men approach, but the second I did, I gulped. One of them was Eugene, a lab tech I apparently unnerved during a prior investigation. I gave him a slight wave and he recoiled. If I didn’t know any better, I could have sworn his pale complexion turned even whiter.

  Eugene’s response didn’t escape Grizzly Gary, who motioned him closer. “Miss Ellington discovered the body. You and Treyton can get started. By the way, when’s the coroner getting here?”

  “He’s on his way now,” Treyton replied, running a hand through his wavy auburn hair. With his stocky build and broad shoulders, the tech looked more like a bodybuilder than a forensic lab technician.

  Theo and I stood off to the side while the men approached the body. They were two or three feet away when I called out, “You may want to get a forensic entomologist over here to determine the exact time of death.”

  I had barely finished my sentence when I heard, “Miss Ellington, please! Do not interfere with a criminal investigation. Our forensic team, in conjunction with the coroner, are capable enough to make a preliminary determination. In fact, I see no reason whatsoever for you or Mr. Buchman to remain on scene. You’re free to go about your business. If I need to contact either of you, I will.”

  “Good idea,” Theo said. “Come on, Norrie.”

  Still fixated on the body, I stood perfectly still as Treyton took a few cell phone photos of the body.

  “Okay, guess we can go.”

  Just then, he and Eugene rolled the man on his side and I got a good look at the entire corpse. “Check out the polo shirt,” I whispered to Theo. “It’s got the Lake View Winery logo on it. You don’t suppose it’s someone who works there?”

  “Your chitchat will disturb the forensic team,” Deputy Hickman announced as he moved closer to inspect the body. “You need to leave this area immediately.”

  “We’re on our way,” I said.

  Theo and I were about twenty yards away and
nearing the end of the footpath when I thought of something. “Hold on, I’ve got to go back. It’s important.”

  “Don’t push your luck, Norrie. We don’t need to ask for trouble. They’ve got it under control.”

  “I’m thinking of Eli. That kid’s going to be totally freaked out if the sheriff’s office sends a deputy over there. And believe me, they will. Then Henry Speltmore will pitch a fit because I didn’t inform him of his son’s escapade. That’s all I need. Aggravation from the wine trail.”

  “What are you going to do?”

  “Plead with Grizzly Gary to leave the kid alone. I mean, what’s Eli going to tell him that he doesn’t already know? Besides, those boys didn’t get close enough to see the body, they saw the protruding leg from a distance and bolted out of there. Come on. This should only take a second.”

  I didn’t wait for Theo’s response. I turned and tromped back to where the four men were standing and planted myself directly in front of Deputy Hickman. “Um, there’s no reason for you to pay a visit to Eli Speltmore. Or his friend Stuart, for that matter. They’re little kids and they’ll be up to their eyeballs in trouble with their parents if their parents find out they were in the woods over here. Can you leave well enough alone?”

  It was the first time I’d seen anyone rub their chin and shake their head simultaneously but Deputy Hickman did. “No, I most certainly cannot. To begin with, it’s protocol. Something that cannot be ignored or dismissed, for that matter.”

  “That’s it? Protocol?”

  “That, and the fact Eli Speltmore and his friend are the only ones who can corroborate your story.”

  “What? You don’t think I had anything to do with this?”

  “I don’t think anything at the moment, Miss Ellington. I’m merely fact-finding. That’s what our office does in criminal investigations. Now, if you don’t mind, I believe that’s the coroner approaching.”