The Terrible Gift (Empath Found Book 1)

by Colette Rhodes

  They got me to try to manipulate water, fire, and earth while they discussed my class schedule between them and drew it up on paper. Once, I think I managed to make a ripple in the basin of water I was experimenting with but I may have just been breathing too close to it.

  “Right, here is your class schedule, Ffion,” Gwyneira said, handing me a handwritten schedule. “We have configured it so you can move up to second-year air mastery early if need be, but you will be in the first-year class for now. I have also written a letter introducing you and explaining your situation for you to show the masters,” she added, handing me a long note that I fully intended to read once I was out of her sight.

  “Please come by my cabin after your final class this afternoon for your first mentoring session.” She didn’t elaborate, and Master Eurig’s curiosity burned hot against my skin.

  “I am confident Bryn would show you the way if you cannot recall it,” Gwyneira added kindly, and I snorted under my breath. I was confident that if I asked Bryn for directions, he would bark at me to find Briallen and vanish into the ether. I’d hadn’t even known him for 24 hours, but I felt strangely sure of my ability to read him and it had nothing to do with me being an empath.

  Gwyneira and Master Eurig dismissed me and I hurried back through the tunnel. Marlen was still leaning against the wall, lean, muscled arms crossed over his broad chest, one leg propped up at the knee, dark red hair shining the sun. He looked beautiful, and my breath caught at the sharp tug in my chest, urging me to go to him and act on the intense attraction I felt to him.

  I took a deep, head-clearing breath and could have sworn I saw him do the same.

  “So,” Marlen said, cocking an eyebrow at me. “I heard the distinctive crack of stone, foxglove. Was that the Academy’s strongest air fae giving you a demonstration or were you massively underselling your talent on the way over here?”

  My cheeks heated. “Neither,” I said slowly. “I guess my magic is a little hard to wrangle while I’m all dosed up on human poisons or whatever. It sort of exploded out of me.”

  “So it was you?” Marlen asked, his surprise spiking. “You’d still need a strong base of raw power to draw from to use that kind of force. Shit, foxglove, you might just give Arthus a run for his money. He was the strongest air affinity at the Academy since Master Eurig.” Marlen laughed, seemingly unperturbed by the fact that I’d cracked a solid stone wall with a ball. Fae were crazy.

  “Come on, time for class,” he said, reaching for my schedule. “Let’s give you somewhere productive to direct all that magic.”

  Fi

  I was mortified to show Marlen my class schedule filled with first-year courses, knowing he was a fourth-year and I was almost the same age as him, but he hadn’t judged me at all and had promised to tutor me to help me catch up. He walked me to the entrance to the small stone building my first fire elemental class would be in and his face lit up when we reached a group of younger students milling around the door.

  “Aderyn! You’re in this class? Perfect!” He pulled the redheaded woman into a hug that had me crawling out of my skin with jealousy despite sensing only annoyance from her. My irritation died as he moved back and I got a good look at the girl he’d called Aderyn — she was almost a carbon copy of Marlen. Rein it in Fi. She’s clearly his sister. They looked like they could be twins, but then surely she’d be a fourth-year too?

  “Foxglove, this is...Aderyn Ferris.” Marlen’s voice faltered slightly and I felt a wave of sadness from him and a prickling of shame from her. There were definitely some complicated family dynamics at play here. “She’s a first-year as well. Hopefully, you’ll have a few classes together. I trust her to take good care of you. Aderyn, this is Ffion Smith.” He didn’t elaborate, but the mischievous glint in Aderyn’s eye made me think he didn’t need to.

  “Hello,” I said, giving Aderyn an awkward wave. I felt uncharacteristically shy like I was meeting the in-laws even though Marlen was basically a total stranger at this point.

  “I prefer ‘Fi,’ nice to meet you. You don’t need to babysit me; I don’t want to get in your way.”

  “Nonsense, it would be my pleasure to get to know Marlen’s new friend. Come! Let’s go find a seat. Bye, Marlen!”

  She pulled me away from Marlen before I had a chance to say goodbye, and we headed into the classroom. I was relieved she’d taken the decision out of my hands. I was feeling all kinds of conflicted about this connection with Marlen. I’d have probably done something weird like shake his hand or go for a fist bump or something equally as uncomfortable.

  ◆◆◆

  Aderyn was awesome. She had Marlen’s playfulness but also a quieter, more reserved nature that kind of reminded me of me. But, if I had picked up small tremors of insecurity from Marlen, they crashed over me in waves from Aderyn. It made me wonder what their family was like to make them feel this way.

  She listened with rapt attention as I told her about growing up in Albion and arriving in Avalon yesterday. I sensed less shock from Aderyn than I had from the others at my story. She seemed like the kind of person who just took everything in her stride.

  Aderyn was also doing a lot better in this class than I was despite the term only starting a few weeks ago. I had been worried about going into this class since, as far as I knew, I didn’t have any fire magic. I’d never used it before if I did. It turned out, everyone in this class was in the same boat. The students who had a fire affinity were in a separate ‘mastery’ class, as I would be for my air magic.

  We spent the class learning to grow and shrink a small candle flame. Aderyn managed to manipulate her fire a couple of times, but most students had little to no control and I had even less than that. Nothing happened. For a freaking magic school, the whole thing felt kind of lame.

  “Do you have an affinity element?” I asked Aderyn as I focused on growing the tiny flame.

  “Ah, no, I don’t.” I felt a mixture of embarrassment and disappointment rolling off her and immediately regretted asking the question. Way to make a good impression, Fi.

  “I’m assuming you do? Do you have a strong mating pull to Marlen? He has a water affinity and a gifted ability — healing magic.”

  That threw me. I hadn’t asked Marlen about his magic because I didn’t want him asking about mine; I couldn’t lie if he asked me point blank about gifted abilities. Though healing magic sounded much better than my supposedly gods-given gift.

  “I haven’t really used it much or anything but apparently I have an air affinity,” I muttered, cursing myself for starting this whole conversation.

  “You must think I’m kind of lame, not having an affinity, let alone a gift.” She smiled sadly.

  “Not at all!” I exclaimed, horrified at the suggestion. “I don’t think that, Aderyn.”

  “Really?” I sensed her curiosity. “Maybe it’s because you’re from Albion. We have a caste system here, of sorts. Those with gifted abilities and elemental affinities are at the top, just affinities are the next step down, and regular, low-magic fae like me are at the bottom. We’re the most common in the rest of Avalon but the least respected. Here at the Academy, I’m the only student without an affinity.”

  “That’s awful,” I told her, making sure to hold her eye so she could see my sincerity. “I don’t think any less of you because of whatever magic you do or don’t have.” I was relieved to feel some of her confidence coming back.

  “It wasn’t always like this. Centuries ago, all fae had an affinity, and most had gifted abilities. They were granted at birth by the gods and only taken away if they were abused. And all fae had wings, like huge butterfly wings.” She had a dreamy expression on her face.

  “How many centuries ago? What happened?”

  “My great-great-grandparents were the last generation I believe, maybe 1000 years ago. Someone told you fae have long life spans, right? Anyway, no one really knows what happened. The gods suddenly stopped blessing the babies with gifts except for a select fe
w. A century or so later, the affinities started to disappear too. There are theories as to why — perhaps the gods are punishing us for something. I think they’re dying,” she added the last part quietly.

  I made a note to ask someone about lifespans. That seemed like critical information. Was I going to live until I was 700 or something crazy like that? I wasn’t really sure I wanted to.

  Both Bryn and Gwyneira had mentioned fae having different types and levels of magic but no one had told me fae magic was dying. Then again, most of the people I had met were on the powerful end of the spectrum by the sounds of it and I wondered if there was more to this than I was being led to believe.

  I pondered the magic drought for the remainder of the day and on my walk through the forest to Gwyneira’s cabin for our mentoring session. I had a lot of questions for her.

  ◆◆◆

  Gwyneira welcomed me into her reception room where a tray of tea and fruit was already laid out for us. I had been a little apprehensive about coming here alone, however I hadn’t sensed any worrisome emotions from Gwyneira, and she was probably the best person to talk to about my freaky magic.

  “Good afternoon, Ffion. I hope you enjoyed your first full day at the Academy?”

  “It has been very…interesting.”

  “Oh? Is there something on your mind?” Gwyneira asked, furrowing her brow. “You look concerned.”

  “I guess I’m a little confused as to why I have all this magic. I knew there were different levels of magic and that my empath abilities were unusual, but I found out about the gods today and how fae have less and less magic and no wings. It’s kind of messing with my head.”

  Gwyneira’s sadness rolled off her as she glanced at the tapestry of the six figures on the wall. “Yes, unfortunately so. The gods have not told us their reasons for granting us less magic. We simply have to trust in their wisdom. My guess is that if things continue as they have been, within the next two generations, fae will be born with no magic at all.”

  That answer didn’t really satisfy me. Why did a select few of us have so much more? If there were fae gods — and everyone seemed to be in consensus on that —surely this magic wasn’t being distributed at random? Aderyn seemed like a wonderful person. Why wasn’t she deemed worthy of having an affinity or a gift?

  “I was also wondering about life spans. Someone mentioned that fae have long life spans?”

  I felt Gwyneira’s surprise. “My apologies, Ffion. I should have thought to mention some of this to you or sourced some reference materials for you. This must all be very strange for you. Most fae live for roughly 500 years.”

  I gaped at her in horror. What was I supposed to do for 500 years? It sounded kind of awful.

  “Shouldn’t Avalon be massively overpopulated then?” I blurted out, trying to make sense of everything.

  Gwyneira laughed lightly at my train of thought. “The gods accounted for that. Fae women only have a window of fertility every 50 years until age 350. Seven children in total, without multiple births.”

  Weird. So, so weird. I guess that explains why I’d never gotten my period. I thought I was just a late bloomer.

  A really late bloomer.

  “Is it rude to ask how old you are…?” I asked hesitantly and Gwyneira’s eyes shone with amusement.

  “Usually, though I do not mind indulging you. I recently celebrated my 400th birthday.” She looked freaking great, all things considered. I suppose living that long wouldn’t be so awful if I was still in good health.

  “I understand that this is probably fascinating, but unfortunately we must move on to less pleasant subjects. I would like us to focus on your empath abilities and how best to keep you safe from those who may hunt you for them.

  “Before empaths disappeared, they were hounded by those who wished to either steal their magic and use it themselves or force empaths to work for them. It was particularly dangerous for those who could influence crowds. It is a powerful ability, to bring a group of people to tears, make them angry enough to riot, feel such powerful lust it makes them delirious…” she trailed off as I stared at her in horror. I didn’t want to do any of that.

  “I thought we might start by talking about what you can do already. I have managed to find some ancient reference books for you to study. Still, it has been at least six centuries since the empaths went extinct, and even before then, the empaths were very secretive about their abilities, rightly so. Most of what you will read here are secondhand accounts.”

  “Any knowledge is better than none. At least I have a starting point,” I said uneasily, dreading what I was going to find. I steeled my spine and imagined putting my big girl pants on. The only thing worse than knowing would be not knowing.

  “How do your abilities work currently? Have you noticed any changes since you entered Avalon?”

  “I don’t really know how they work; I don’t have any control over them and they’re different here in Avalon. With humans, the best comparison would be the sea — emotions sort of roll off people like waves and lap against me. I don’t seek them out; I feel anyone within a 10-foot or so radius, but I do have to concentrate on figuring out which emotion belongs to which person if I’m in a crowded room. I always tried to avoid that. Crowds give me a headache,” I explained.

  “With fae, I feel their emotions physically in my body like they’re my own. It’s a more intense sensation but my head feels much clearer since I entered Avalon. Perhaps because there is less emotional noise. Though crowds are still not great. Breakfast in the commons was a little overwhelming.”

  “I think it is likely that the magic in Avalon’s atmosphere is helping you process the emotions more easily. Do you feel emotions differently if they are related to you?”

  I thought about it. “Yes, I suppose the emotions feel more potent if they’re directed at me. It’s not something I noticed all that much until I came here. I tried my best to be as invisible as possible in London — it’s why I worked as a cleaner. But Bryn’s irritation felt much stronger when it was directed at me rather than the carriage driver.” I felt my face heat. Why did I say that? I totally ratted him out to the dean.

  Gwyneira chuckled. “Bryn has always had a rather serious disposition. You will be good for him.”

  She had the same mischievous glint in her eye that Briallen did when she was talking about mating so I quickly deflected to safer territory. I did not want to speak to Gwyneira about the weird mating pull I had towards Bryn. I didn’t want to talk to anybody about it. Even if I didn’t want the whole mating thing, his blatant rejection of me before he’d had a chance to get to know me was hurting my pride.

  “Do you know if there’s a way to block out the emotions?”

  “I cannot be sure that it will work, but fae used to practice putting up mental shields to block empath magic. It may not be suitable since you will be trying to block out your own magic rather than someone else’s but it is something I thought we could try in these sessions.”

  A tiny ember of hope flared in my chest at the thought of getting everyone else’s emotions off my skin and out of my head.

  “What do you know about other empath abilities? Will mine grow stronger as I work on my air magic? Honestly, I don’t want them to; the headaches already drive me crazy. Plus, people always felt uncomfortable around me when they realized I had a strange sense of intuition. I don’t need more reasons to scare people away,” I rambled nervously.

  A different older man to the one who brought in the tea yesterday came in. He whispered something in Gwyneira’s ear, affectionately kissing her temple before he left. Another one of her mates? This whole multiple mates thing was screwing with my head. Everyone seemed so chill about it, but having a whole harem of lovers definitely veered into kink-territory in my head. Did ancient Gwyneira and her two dudes get it on together? Why had my thoughts taken me in this horrific direction?

  “My apologies, Ffion. I am going to have to cut this session short. Duty calls.” She ch
uckled, handing me a stack of books about empaths she’d collected.

  “You do not need to worry about your empath abilities growing by chance or because of your elemental training. It is strong magic. Any growth requires strong magic for balance. Once you begin claiming your mates, you will see an increase in your empath abilities, provided you choose mates whose magic is as strong as yours. I will send word to your cabin to schedule another session as soon as I can. Be well, Fionn.” And with that bombshell, she swept out of the room.

  Well, if I was hesitant about the whole mating concept before, I was outright hostile to it now.

  Fi

  Overwhelmed by my first day of classes, mentoring with Gwyneira, and my first full day of not being human, I shuffled into the commons and dropped down next to Briallen. She gave me a sympathetic smile and disappeared to make a plate of food for me. I was already feeling attached to this girl; she was so kind. Then I remembered what Gwyneira had said about empaths being hunted for their abilities and began to question the wisdom of being friends with Briallen. I didn’t intend to tell Briallen about my abilities any time soon and it seemed unfair to befriend her and potentially paint a target on her back without full disclosure.

  As she returned with my food, she surreptitiously sat across from me as Marlen slid into the chair next to me. I cocked an eyebrow at Briallen. Subtle. Marlen offered me a charming smile and the excitement rolling off him was enough to lift my spirits a little.

  “Hey, foxglove. How was day one?”

  “It was a lot. Like a lot to take in. A lot to remember. Just a lot.”

  I felt a spike of concern from Marlen that made my resolve melt a little. He didn’t even know me; he had no reason to feel worried about me. I was going to get myself into trouble with this boy, I could feel it in my waters.

  Leigh joined us and I found my spirits lifting as he relayed his escapades from the day. He told us how he’d spent his air mastery lesson sneakily swapping everyone’s satchels around from the row in front of him by gusting them along the floor, baffling his classmates at the end of the lesson. Apparently, Leigh had a healthy dose of mischief in him and a knack for discretely casting air magic without drawing attention. I wondered if he'd be interested in tutoring me.