Never Enough

by Kristina M Sanchez

  He closed his eyes tightly, feeling a massive weight lift off his shoulders. His chest loosened, and he gasped, the light feeling making him a little dizzy. He didn’t fight it when Mina guided his head to rest at her breast. He wrapped his arms around her waist, letting her brush her fingers through his hair. “Thank you,” he said, his voice gone rough.

  Chapter 18

  Dante and Momma Cora were avid church-goers. Mostly, Mina saw it as a challenge she had to tiptoe over every few weeks. She wasn’t a fan, and no cajoling from Momma Cora could make her one.

  Val, on the other hand, was exempt from her wheedling. One of the perks of being an accepted delinquent, Mina supposed.

  She waited until she heard their car pull away before she leapt out of bed. She eased Val’s door open. Sure enough, he was fast asleep.

  The way Val slept broke her heart a little. He was on his side, his legs drawn up almost to his chest. It was such a vulnerable position. Defensive.

  She padded across the room and got on the bed, sitting cross-legged in the space beside him. He gave a soft grunt but didn’t wake. She smiled, brushing her fingers through his hair around his ear. He made a soft noise, moving his head.

  As he came slowly awake, Mina pressed his shoulder. He followed her silent direction, letting her guide his head onto her lap. He rolled onto his back, blinking with sleep-hooded eyes and a soft smile on his lips. She cradled his chin in her hands, strumming her thumbs along the stubble. “I should brush my teeth,” he muttered, his voice scratchy and sexy.

  “For what? You think I’m going to kiss you? Pfft. You’re not getting any right now.”

  A devilish look came into his eyes. “You think not?”

  She leaned down and kissed the tip of his nose before straightening back up. “There. That’s all you get.” She traced the shape of his jaw. “We should talk.”

  “Oh, yeah.” He reached up, his hand sliding along the side of her neck in a gentle caress. “Apparently, you have a boyfriend. Is that what we should talk about?”

  Mina bit the inside of her cheek, tamping down the well of pleasure that bubbled up inside her as she looked down at his handsome face. “Makes sense, no? I mean, I don’t know. You got a lot of side pieces?”

  He snickered, flashing a grin that was all teeth, as he found a spot just behind her ear and rubbed. “You know me. I walk down the street, and women are falling all over themselves trying to get in my bed.”

  “Hey, there’s no accounting for taste. I’m not going to assume.” She reached down and tickled his belly. He laughed, squirmed, and caught her wrist in a firm grip.

  His look gentled, and he brought her captured hand to his lips, taking her knuckle in his mouth and giving it a playful bite. Then he dropped their joined hands to his chest. “Mija, do you think it’s a good idea to want me like that? For keeps?”

  She turned her head, self-consciousness sending a wave of irritation through her. “If you don’t want me like that, you just have to say so. I’m no—”

  He laughed and reached up to tweak her nose. “This isn’t about what I want. It can’t be.”

  She had to resist the urge to roll her eyes. “Don’t get dramatic. There are two of us here. You want to do this thing, be my person, or what?”

  “It’s not that simple.” His lip tugged up at the corner, and he ran his fingers in small circles on her leg. “You know, I’ve never really had a chance to think about that? What I want? Not about anything. When you’re a kid, they tell you all it takes is hard work and you can do anything.” He shook his head. “That’s bullshit. I’m a felon. I gotta take the jobs I can get. Forget about dreams. I can get lucky. A nice guy can come along and hand me a good career on a platter.”

  His eyes flicked up to her, and he grinned. “A beautiful woman can tell me she wants me for her own. It feels like too much luck.”

  “I literally just told you not to get dramatic, Valentin.”

  He shrugged. “I don’t know how to think about big things.”

  “Oh, my fuck. Val, this isn’t difficult. Yes or no? In or out?”

  “It’s insanely simple for me. You know what you do when you see a lucky star? You run after it as long as you can see it. I’m with you. As long as you want me. You’re the best thing that’s ever happened in my life, now and before.” He waggled his eyebrows. “Though for much different reasons now than when you were tiny.”

  Her heart had picked up a rapid pace, and at this last, she pointed a finger in his face. “Don’t tell me you’ve been thinking about sex since I walked in here.”

  Val bucked his hips, guiding her so she was the one on her back and he was staring down at her, propped on his elbows. “You’re a fantastic fuck, Mina, but you know that’s not what I’m talking about.” He leaned down and kissed her—a sweet kiss, chaste but lingering—and when he pulled back, he kissed the tip of her nose. “My answer is simple, but yours…” He kissed her again, a peck. “Yours isn’t so easy.”

  “Val—”

  “No. I need you to realize what it means that you have choices. You’re twenty-two years old. You have nothing but choices ahead of you. I’ve lived all my life one day to the next, because that’s about as far as I can plan things. What I feel for you, Mina, mi amor, is all magic and stardust. You have to see me for who I am. Then you choose.” He shook his head, cutting off her protest again. “We hid this from Mom and Dante. You hid this. Why?”

  “Because it’s a little weird. They’re my guardians, my parents, even if I don’t think of them as my mother and father. My Momma Cora is your momma, but I’m not your sister.”

  “And you’re full of shit. That’s not the only reason you hid it. That’s not the only thing they’d have to say. ¿Sabes? I’m not the kind of man parents want for their daughter, even if they didn’t know me. You have to think about it. That’s all.”

  By that point, Mina’s lips were pressed into a thin line. She looked away from him, hating that her eyes stung. She had the petulant thought that she wanted the simplicity of her teenage years back. Go to school, and if you liked a boy and he liked you, he was your boyfriend. What was there to think about?

  But life kept reminding her she was an adult. She was responsible for planning everything out now, and she should think with her long-term goals in mind. She’d watched him live life by the seat of his pants, and it had never done him any favors.

  “My love” he had called her.

  She looked at him and cupped her hand behind his neck. She pulled him down to her and kissed him hard. He whimpered against her mouth and gave in, putting his full weight on her as he tilted his head into her kiss.

  When they were both breathless, she pulled back and took his face in her hands. “Everyone makes mistakes, viejo—my old, wise man. Tell you what. If we crash and burn, you’ll be my favorite one. That all right with you?”

  His grin was wide, kind of goofy, and beautiful. “You’re the boss, baby. It’s all you.”

  Chapter 19

  “What’s all this?”

  Val gave a short snort of derision and ran a hand through his hair. He tilted his head, looking up at his boss. “I’m seriously regretting being born in California.” He sat up straight, rifling through the mess he had spread around him on the table. There were printed pages, booklets, and flyers in the mix. “Other than that, I have no idea what the hell I’m doing.”

  “Trying to buy a place?” Tuck asked, sliding into the seat across from him.

  “Ha. Right. Buy a place.” Val crossed his arms, leaning on the table. “A guy like me doesn’t own much, but in Southern California? The only house I’ll ever own is a house of cards. I’m lucky. I think I can just about afford my own space instead of renting a room, but I don’t know where to start.”

  “Finally had enough of your stepfather?”

  Val hesitated but inwardly rolled his eyes. He wasn’t one to air his business, but hell. Tuck had already heard him whine oft
en enough. “I was sick of Dante the minute I decided to come back to California.” He rubbed at his chin, thinking and overthinking. “Maybe it was the wrong thing. I kept telling myself I needed to stay still, put up with Dante’s shit long enough that I could have something. What do they call it…? A nest egg? You know what I mean? Enough money that the next time the shit hits the fan for me—and it always does—I’m not going to start that cycle of paying the bills and then the rent late. I’ve been down that road before. You can’t get anywhere when you’re always falling behind. It’s expensive as hell to be broke.”

  “That’s a rock and a hard place. I get what you’re saying, but it’s gotta suck to be in that position, to have to take whatever bullshit he dishes out.”

  “Eh.” Val shrugged. “There’s no shortage of people who want to tell me I’m an asshole. I can take it, but my, uh, circumstance has changed.”

  Tuck raised an eyebrow. “Oh, yeah?”

  “Yeah.” In spite of himself, Val felt his lips start to tug up of their own volition. It was all he could do to keep from grinning. “My lady wants to get serious.”

  Tuck laughed and gave his arm a healthy thwack. “Good, right? That’s a good thing.”

  “Man, everything in my life has ended in flames, so I don’t know. I don’t know if I want her mixed up in all that.” He rolled his shoulders and let himself smile. “But it’s what she wants, and who am I to argue with that?”

  Val straightened up, patting the stack of papers in front of him. “A guy my age should have his shit together, but I don’t even know what that means. If it’s just me, it doesn’t matter too much. I figured I’d find a room to rent at some point, but if I’m going to do this thing with Mina, I need to think more than one step ahead. I gotta know my next move.”

  “You mean like a five-step plan? That’s kind of yuppie, don’t you think?” Tuck asked, teasing him. “No, but for real, bro. That’s not a bad thing. You set an end goal and figure out all the steps in between. That’s what they call adulting.”

  “People have been trying to get me to set a damn goal all my life.” Val shook his head. “What does that even mean?”

  “Stability’s probably the first thing. Not that you asked me.”

  “I kind of did.”

  “Yeah, then. Stability. You got the job, and you’re doing well here. That’s good. When you’re thinking about a place, you want something that’s not going to cost you every penny you earn, because you need room to grow.” He winked at Val. “And you need a place at least nice enough to impress your woman. No slum and not a room in someone else’s house.”

  His boss drummed his fingertips on the tabletop a few seconds before he shook his head. “I’m no help here. I never had to house hunt, because my mom gave me the house my grandparents left her. But I’ll tell you what.” He pointed at the kitchen. “You got a lot of people back there. It doesn’t hurt to ask around. There’s always someone who has some kind of hook-up.”

  “I don’t want to bother people. I keep my head down and do my work.”

  Tuck gave him an odd look. “Your crew has your back, Val. They like you. They’ll help you.”

  Now there was a weird thought. Help? Camaraderie?

  But Tuck was right. It didn’t hurt to ask around.

  ~0~

  After his talk with Tuck, Val started to see the way his crew moved in a different light. He hadn’t thought much about it before. He did his work as quickly and efficiently as possible, following the orders of the long line of chefs above him with a succinct, “Yes, chef.”

  But now that Val thought about it, he could see how the crew truly cared about each other. Like when Ryan’s dog had been hit by a car, the others could have been all tough guy about it, but they’d spent all of a busy lunch shift telling stories about their lost pets in between barking out orders.

  “You kiddin’ me?” their sous-chef, a linebacker-looking motherfucker named Tony, had said. “When I had to put Lady Marmalade down, I curled up on the floor at the vets. Didn’t even care that if it was dirty or whatever. I just cried, man.” He’d looked a little misty-eyed even then. “No shame in that game, brother. She was my baby.”

  Val could relate. He’d bought a puppy in a desperate attempt to make his son like him. Trust Emile to be the one little boy on the planet to dislike dogs. But Val had gotten attached by the time he had to switch apartments to a place that didn’t allow dogs. It had broken his heart.

  When Val saw Ryan was about to lose it, he’d casually mentioned that they were out of pickles and maybe he could go to the store room and get them.

  The crew was chummy with him too. One time, Mina had met him for his lunch break. They hadn’t gotten further than the car where their make-out session had gotten a little heated. Marie had seen them and told the others. He’d returned from lunch to a chorus of razzing.

  “You’re breaking Danesh’s heart,” Marie had chided. “He thought he might’ve had a chance, but now…”

  “You do have such a pretty face,” Danesh agreed with a sigh of mock-despair.

  “Hey, Val. If you’ve got a girlfriend, why’re you always lookin’ so surly, huh?” Tony asked.

  “He don’t look so surly now. You sure they were just making out?” Ryan snickered.

  Though, they could turn, and Val knew that too. If someone came into the kitchen not ready to pull their weight or keep them moving as a team, they were iced out pretty quickly.

  That was part of what kept Val on his toes. He didn’t want to mess with the good thing he had, but he also didn’t want to let down his crew.

  Which was why Murphy’s Law kicked in on the worst possible day.

  A critic was going to be dining with them, so everyone had been on edge, sharpening their A-game for a solid week. That day—the day—Val fell asleep on the couch in the morning, something he almost never did, and woke up three minutes before his shift was supposed to start. When he got to work twenty minutes late, he was held up even longer by an insane amount of traffic around the circle. He found out later that the university up the street was having some kind of festival, which meant not only extra traffic and ridiculous parking conditions, but an overwhelming influx of diners too.

  They were busy, and to top it all off, Marie had gotten into a minor car accident that morning. It was nothing life threatening, but she was still at the hospital.

  After his gaff, Val was determined not to call attention to himself. He kept his hands busy and his eye on the prize, hustling when someone barked an order at him. He ignored the persistent vibration of his phone in his pocket.

  Someone wanted to get ahold of him. Badly.

  When his ass had been vibrating for fifteen minutes straight, Val couldn’t ignore it anymore. His heart was pounding fast, his throat tight, both because he was positive something was really wrong and he was dreading what he had to do next.

  “Chef,” he called, getting the attention of the head chef.

  The man didn’t turn around. “Talk to me.”

  Here goes nothing. “I need to step out.”

  The chef stopped what he was doing, standing stock still for two beats before Val hurried on. “Five minutes. I think it’s an emergency.”

  “And after you were late today, huh? Get out of my sight.”

  Val grimaced but didn’t argue. He stepped away, and Danesh moved in seamlessly, taking on his work as well as his own. Val hurried out the back door, his phone already in hand. As he pushed outside, he pulled up his missed calls list.

  Mina. Mina. Mina. Mina. Her name repeated over and over. His heart leapt to his throat. He pressed her name to connect a call and waited, patting his pockets for his keys as an all-around bad feeling consumed him. “Pick up. Pick up.”

  “Val?” Her voice trembled as she connected the call.

  He let out a breath in a gust. “What’s wrong?” he demanded, because he knew without a doubt something was.

  “I
need you.” She took a wheezy, shaky breath. “I need you to come get me. Please. Now.”

  About a million questions raced through his mind, but none of them mattered. He was already striding toward the parking lot. “Tell me where you are.”

  Chapter 20

  Mina was furious.

  And scared, yeah. She couldn’t remember ever being more scared than she was right then. She was shaking so badly it was a wonder she could keep walking. The sirens were still too close.

  “Where are you going? Mina, come—”

  Mina yanked her arm out of Celeste’s grasp. “Get the hell off me.”

  Celeste grabbed her again, yanking her down another alleyway, away from the main street she’d been heading to. “Would you calm down?”

  “Calm down? No. That’s not happening.” She shook Celeste off again. “I’m so through listening to you. I just ran out of a house like a damn criminal because… Fuck. I am a criminal. You made me a criminal.”

  “I didn’t make you anything. We weren’t doing anything. We were serving drinks, for Christ’s sake. That’s not illegal.”

  Mina rounded on her friend. “Can we cut the bullshit since we’re currently on the run from the goddamn cops?”

  “Don’t be so dramatic. We’re not on the run. On the run means they actually know we exist and are about to throw us in jail.”

  “Oh, yeah?” Mina stopped mid-step and started heading back where they came from. “Then, come on. No need for us to run. Let’s go tell them we were there.”

  Celeste made an aggravated sound and pulled Mina back. “What do you think you’re trying to prove?”

  “That we were breaking the law, and you know it. You’ve always known it, yet every time I tried to get away from this bullshit, you dragged me back.”

  Celeste stepped up to her then, getting right in her face, and thrust a finger at her chest. “You want to play that game? Don’t try to come at me like you’re some innocent angel.”

  Mina shoved her. “Get the fuck out of my face,” she hissed, finally getting her trembling fingers to work enough to pull her phone out of her pocket. The need to be far away from here—and even further from Celeste—was palpable. She managed to press the three buttons she needed to dial.