by McKayla Jade
Hurt her. Kill her, lanced through his mind. “Run.” He choked out. When Cassidy obeyed him without hesitation he sank to his knees. Controlling his rage was not easy. It pushed at him from somewhere deep inside. This black magic was a powerful thing, but he would die before he let it hurt her. Dalton and Calum burst into the room. He looked up and took a deep breath. He was calm now, but he knew he would have to explain, but as he opened his mouth her scent wafted into the room. He roared as pain slammed into him.
Kill her.
Holding his head in his hands he roared. “No! Damn you! I’ll not hurt her!” Dalton wrapped his arms tight around her and ran with her from the room. Calum closed and locked the door behind him. Turning back to Hawk he said, “What happened? What is happening?” He shook his head and looked up at him from his knees. “I know not. Just, keep her safe. Kill me if you must, just don’t let me hurt her.” “Well, there will be no killing on my watch, of you, nor her.” Calum told him. “Perhaps she should just keep her distance for tonight.” He agreed. He and Calum talked for most of the night, finally he said “I seek my bed. I feel fine, just defeated. Good sleep my friend.”
Calum nodded and silently left the room. Hawk’s thoughts were in turmoil. How was he to get near Cassidy ever again if this magic, this black magic, parasite wanted him to kill her? How could he keep it under control? Tonight, he almost lost it and in turn lost her. He rubbed his hands down his face and said into the empty room.
“Damn.”
Chapter 16
Hawk found himself in the training fields again this day. He watched his men learn to fight in new ways and to learn to think and react differently than before. They had never faced demon’s or creatures before. The world they had come from was human and only human: until he had been turned into half dragon, half man by a dying witch. That day, he and his men had become closer than any other fighting men. They had vowed to keep his secret and vowed to fight to protect him and his own. Now a dark mage was hunting him, by way of trying to kill Cassidy. Alexandar was still working on a way to fight the black magic that was slowly consuming him. Keith was next to face a Centaur. Gareth had already faced him, and he would say Gareth had lost; however, Gareth had gained valuable knowledge. It was truly no loss at all. Just a lesson. Keith had been one of Hawk’s elite warriors since the death of his wife two years ago. Keith had always been a soldier for the Hawkins family, but the day his wife died in his arms, was the day Keith’s world changed. He, as Hawk saw it, was numb. He fought hard because he had nothing left to lose. It made him an incredible fighter because his emotions never got in the way. He never second guessed himself. He never hesitated. He was just an efficient soldier and a calculating killer. Nothing more. Nothing less.
Keith had indeed watched Gareth. The first swing of his sword told Hawk that much. He swung high because the centaur expected the low swing. Most men think to cut off the legs of the centaur. That cuts off the centaur’s escape and keeps those hooves from reaching you. Giving the person who goes for the large torso and chest area a better chance of cutting deeply. Indeed, it did catch the centaur off his guard. Making him step backwards to avoid a fatal blow. Still Keith showed no emotion. Then the centaur charged. Using his massive chest to push Keith off balance and into the crowd of soldiers gathered around the field.
Keith regained his footing and charged the Centaur, but the horse man was ready. He smiled as he sidestepped. Keith’s blade missed his intended target but left a bloody trail down his side. He watched closely to see if Keith would show any emotion whatsoever. If he never did, would Keith ever change into a demon, like the rest of them? The Centaur turned away as if to retreat and threw his big body into Keith. He knocked the big man to the ground. Keith roared with rage and his chest heaved. He jumped onto the horse man’s back and put his sword to the neck of the man. Giant black wings exploded from his back ripping his shirt apart and shocking everyone watching. Keith dropped his sword for the first time in his life. Hawk could see the pain etched on his face, as his muscles bunched, and his breathing became labored. Both participants stopped. He reached for Keith’s thoughts and found just what he suspected. Keith was in more pain than he was letting the others see. ‘You can show your brothers your pain.’ He encouraged him. ‘We all know what it is like to go through. Breathe deeply. It helps to lessen the pain.’ Keith jumped to the ground. There was no way he could hide it. The pain was like nothing he would have ever felt before. Everything would hurt. Every muscle. Every bone. It would feel as if his body were tearing itself apart. Keith’s chest heaved with his attempt to breathe. Hawk listened to Keith’s racing thoughts as the man writhed in pain, confusion and humiliation screaming through his warrior. It surprised Hawk none of his warriors felt as he did, that this was a curse. They marveled at the abilities. He focused on the limitations.
He put his hand on Keith’s shoulder. “Welcome, my brother. I hoped it would be this way for you. I could not go to battle without all my warriors. You are just a bit tougher to crack than the others.” “I suppose I am. Since Sandra.... I have not had much reason to feel emotion.” He confessed. “We all know her passing was hard on you, but without emotion you are only half of what a man should be.” Hawk told him. “Aye. It was.” Was all Keith could manage to say. He was glad Keith had finally shifted. All his other elite warriors had. Each dealing with it in their own ways. Each one triggered by something different. They now made an impressive looking troop. Each man had giant black wings. Every one of them except Keith and Marcus had a gold band on each arm above the bicep. Keith and Marcus both had tattoos that were interesting. He would ask Alexandar about the differences at the meal tonight.
He patted Keith on the back as he stood and said, “I think that is enough training for the day, let us sup. I am starved.”
He waited until all the others had left the field before he began speaking to his elite warriors. “I wish to know why Keith and Marcus have tattoos instead of gold bands. It seems odd, for us all to be matched, except for these gold bands. There must be a meaning or reason.” His men nodded in agreement. There were so many things happening to them and so fast. Every day they were learning something new.
These last few days were spent on the fields learning battle techniques they had never thought of before. They had never fought with or against these types of men. It had been decided, tomorrow they would train with their mates. This was all new territory for them. Never had women been on the field with them. Some of them were hesitant to allow it, but Alexandar had insisted. He said they would discuss it further, at the evening meal tonight, as not any of Hawk’s men except Gareth had a woman.
EVERYONE HAD GATHERED in the hall and the announcement was made that food was served. Taking their places at the tables, Hawk noticed Cassidy trembled. “Are you well, m’ dear?”
She smiled. “Yes, Sire.”
“Your head does not ache, does it?” He wanted to know.
“No, Sire. I am excited to hear what Alexandar has to say about tomorrow’s field training.” She told him.
Across the room Alexandar entered the hall. Everyone got quiet. It seemed everyone knew this would not be an easy conversation. Alexandar chatted with a few people while making his way to Keith. Once making sure Keith had fared well in his transition, or half transition, since he had no mate. The sorcerer moved on, taking his seat at the head table. There he sat himself down and looked directly at Hawk.
He nodded to Alexandar. “Good evening, friend. It is good to have you here with us tonight.”
“Yes, I can tell. It is very good that I came. I am thinking I need to stay for a bit, since you seem set against the very idea of doing battle with your greatest asset by your side.” Alexandar leaned his elbows on the table pushing his plate aside, his hands cupped under his chest. He asked him. “How do you suppose you can do battle alone, without your mate there to help you, should you have need?”
Hawk glanced at her. “I fight better when I know she is safe and f
ar from the danger.”
The smug look on his face told Cassidy he was in trouble. His next words confirmed it. “How can I concentrate on the battle if I am worried about Cassidy?”
“I’ll tell you how, you little snot!” Alexandar was clearly not impressed by his words or thoughts. “You give her the training and support she is asking for. Then you will have no doubts, for if she fails, YOU fail! Each of you is not whole without the other! If you are wounded, only she can touch you! Any other will die! Is that what you want for your warriors? Death?”
Heat radiated from Hawk. “I would die before I would put Cassidy on the front lines of battle. How can it be, Alexandar? Keith has no mate! Nor Marcus! Nor Calum! And yet they fight, and they fight well!”
“They that do not have mates yet, also do not have poison coursing through their veins! If you would remember, once not too long ago, you did not have poison.” Alexandar stood and fired back, so unlike his character, everyone in the room stopped to stare. “Hawk! Mark my words! Your thick skull will lead you down a dark path! It is not a place you wish to be! You must learn to accept changes where they are needed! And above all, you must listen to the Magic! It is what guides us all to our destiny.”
One moment Alexandar was standing in front of them and the next he was gone. Looking around the room, all she saw were the looks of censure from his men. No one ever talked to Alexandar that way. No one had ever dared. She carefully eased into Hawk’s mind. He knew he had made a mistake, but he would not listen to a man who thought a woman like her needed to be on the front lines. It was absurd. He thought her brave, but too tiny to be of much use on the battlefield. She could be near if he should be injured, but never on the front lines. The thought had him mad with fear for her. His whole body shook.
Cassidy did not need to be inside his mind to feel his rage. She reached her hand out to touch his forearm. As her fingertips touched him, he yanked it away, as if her touch burned him. He looked at her as if he had just now noticed her and blinked.
“I need to go.” He stood and abruptly left the great hall. Now it was her turn to blink. She had meant only to offer her support, not anger him further. She tried to jump into his thoughts, but he had blocked her. He was really getting good with his new skills. She had to admire him for that. So why was it so difficult for him to accept she had her own abilities? It had to be the black magic. It was the only thing that made sense. She sat in the great hall, surrounded by her people and her brother warriors, completely alone. Her meal untouched in front of her, trying to show her people, her strength.
She picked up her food and began to eat; the food, however, had no flavor. Everyone followed her lead and tried to move forward. None of them really knowing what to do or say. They ate and the minstrels began to play again. If one did not look too closely, they would assume all was as it should be. Inside, however, her heart was breaking again. Falling at her feet, piece by tiny piece. Her chin quivered and her vision blurred. She took a deep breath and tried to calm herself down. She was the queen. She must be strong. How was she to fight by the king’s side if she was so weak, she cried. It was not to be. As she sat there trying to hold herself together, she shifted. Her wings exploded from her back and she lurched forward to grab hold of the table.
Gareth was at her side before Jenna could get around the table. He knelt at her side as she slid to the floor in front of her chair. Her head was bowed low, but she whispered. “I am sorry.” He took her shaking hand in his and told her.
“There is nothing to be sorry for. You are doing everything you are supposed to. You are the one accepting all the changes thrown at you with grace and dignity. He is the one struggling.”
“I need him now.” Putting a hand to her forehead, she whispered. “This ache is intense.”
“Then call him to you.” Jenna knelt on her other side. “He will have to come back. Won’t he?”
“I know not. I just cannot focus past this pain.” She gripped the table edge tight and tried to concentrate. His total rejection hurt more than she wanted to admit. “He has blocked my thoughts to him.”
“Alexandar should know. Where has he gone?” Gareth looked around the room. Alexandar was nowhere to be found. Gareth’s desperation did nothing to help. “We will take you up to your bed chamber. Hawk will be here soon.” She heard the lie for what it was. Gareth had no idea where Hawk went or when he would return.
Gareth told Jenna. “Come with us? I have Megan with me tonight. Training in the healing arts. I see, I can wait no longer on that. Can you attend Cassidy?”
Jenna told him. “Yep. Sure can.”
Gareth wrapped his arms around her and carried her from the hall. She heard Gerard step up then and announced to the hall of people.
“Feast! The queen is simply tired from her training today. The king had matters to attend to. They send their good wishes for us to feast and enjoy our evening. We will see them both in the morn.” She stopped listening.
Her head throbbed, and her heart ached right along with it. The latch of the door seemed too loud and the light within the room hurt. She turned her face into Gareth’s chest, wishing he were Hawk. If he were, she would not be hurting now. He gently laid her on the bed and turned back to Jenna. She heard him talking, but couldn’t tell exactly what they said, nor did she care. She curled up on the bed and sobbed. Hawk’s rejection and this pain lancing through her made everything hurt. Every muscle. Every joint. Every heartbeat threatened to choke her.
Chapter 17
Cassidy woke enough to hear Gareth and Jenna talking, but she did not bother to move. Hawk was gone and she was dying.
“Doesn’t her blood call to him? Isn’t that how the magic works?” Jenna was asking Gareth.
“It does, but for some reason he has blocked her thoughts to him and has not checked in on her as he knows he should.”
“Do you think this is part of that black Magic?” Jenna wanted to know. Cassidy didn’t hear Gareth’s response, nor did she care. Too much pain was coursing through her. She had to focus on keeping it at bay.
“Take care of her while I try to find Hawk. He could not have gone far.” With one eye open, she saw Jenna nod and Gareth turned to the balcony. He shifted fast and hard. She would have sworn she could hear his bones breaking. He stretched his wings and glided off into the night.
She had laid in the bed for what seemed like hours. Megan had brought a tea that eased the pain but could do nothing to take it away. She was numb. She had wallowed in self-pity long enough. Either Hawk would come back in time or he would not. Gareth and Megan would find a cure, or they would not. All she could do was wait and bear the pain. She was tired of the desperate looks Megan kept giving her, as if any moment she would perish. Thankfully, Jenna had kept her distance, staying by the balcony drapes and not saying much. She was in no mood to talk. The silence suited her.
She tossed back the covers and slid off the side of the bed. Jenna gasped, making her look up. Three of the Elites came to stand in front of her. She squinted her eyes and looked up into the face of the man nearest her. “Gareth?” She asked.
“‘No. Tis I, Keith, M’ Lady. I have come to see how you fare and to inform you, we have searched everywhere, and we will continue our search for Hawk as soon as we have rested.”
She raised her hand as she walked toward him. “Do not.” She began to say and had to swallow past the lump in her throat. “Do not trouble yourselves.”
All three men knelt in front of her and Keith took her ice-cold hands into his, kissing her knuckles. “M’ Lady do not ask me to stop looking for him. I cannot. ‘Tis not for him I seek him, but for you. I swore my allegiance to you as well. I will not fail you.”
She placed her hand upon his shoulder and used his strength to steady herself. “You honor me. Thank you, good sir. My brothers.” She tried to look at each in turn.
“M’ Lady. I am truly honored but please, rest upon your bed. It does you no good to wander about your chambers.” Keith s
tood and helped her back to bed. “Jenna. I leave our Queen in your care once again.”
She saw Jenna nod and as each of the Elite’s left they knelt in front of her and swore they would find Hawk for her. New tears tracked down her cheeks, and when she wiped them away, her cold fingers made her tremble. It would not be long now, and she would freeze to death. She saw Jenna adding logs to the fire. ‘You could come sit here in this chair.’ Jenna sent her. She had people who cared around her now, and she would not live to relish that fact.
Chapter 18
Hawk glided through the night skies. His thoughts in turmoil and as dark as this night. How could he have treated Cassidy this way? He had been cold to her. He was not ready for her to be in danger. It had nothing to do with her. So why had he lashed out at her? She was the last person he had wanted to hurt, and she had been the first. She did not deserve that, but he had not been able to stop himself. Even now just thinking about it was getting him nowhere. He could see no good from either outcome. If he let her join on the battlefield she could be killed. If he did not, he might perish before she could reach him. Since no one else could touch his blood or repair his wounds.
He looked below him at the beauty of the dark landscape coursing by. He loved the quiet and the peace of the night. He loved the freedom his wings gave him. It came with such a great cost. When he had taken Cassidy flying, she had indeed been a quick study. She would have to learn to shift faster and on command, to be on the battlefield. It might be her only escape. Is that why he had not found the time to teach her everything about it yet? He had thought sharing the skies with her flying next to him would be exhilarating. The more he thought on it, the more he disliked the idea. It was nice when he could hold her in his arms and carry her through the skies. It was a different matter all-together, to let her fly on her own.