A Mother for His Twins

by Jill Weatherholt

  “I think the boys will have a really good time,” Joy said as she connected a piece of the puzzle.

  Jordan lifted his head and crinkled his brow. “My mommy died from Cwones disease.”

  “It’s Crohn’s,” Tyler corrected his brother. “He has trouble with words that have an r in them. He’s getting better, though. He did speech therapy in Chicago,” Tyler said before directing his attention back to the puzzle.

  Joy fixed her eyes on Nick, but he looked away. He didn’t want to see pity—the typical look he got from people when they heard about his wife. Following her death, going to work each day had been torture. The words of comfort and encouragement he’d received from his coworkers did nothing to ease his guilt. He knew they meant well, but if they’d known the truth, they would have been giving him a look of disgrace. In the end, he’d taken a leave of absence to try to deal with his grief.

  Bella broke the silence that lingered. “So, will you come to the resort? It will be so much fun.”

  The boys looked up, their eyes hungry for a yes from their father. How could he say no? The twins deserved to have fun even if the idea of attending the event turned his stomach into a giant knot. “Well, if it’s mandatory, I can’t exactly leave the two of you home alone... I’ve seen that movie.” He forced a smile.

  Giggles filled the room.

  Nick swallowed hard as he searched for a reason not to take Jordan and Tyler. The truth was, there were a million reasons, but the biggest one tore pieces of his heart every day. How could he attend an event for Crohn’s that would support others, when he hadn’t even helped his own wife?

  * * *

  Friday morning, the school cafeteria was a beehive of activity with adults getting their caffeine fix from the various lattes being served at the coffee bar and children loaded up with sugary sweets.

  Nick had learned the annual bake sale was another way the school earned money so teachers didn’t have to assume the cost of supplies for their classrooms. Glancing around the room, he decided whoever had this idea was a genius.

  “Did you try one of your peanut butter chocolate chip cookies?” Joy asked as she approached holding treats wrapped in a napkin. She wore a pair of fitted jeans and a bright red sweatshirt with the school’s logo. Casual Friday was another idea Nick liked about the school.

  Even dressed casually, Joy looked beautiful. His breath hitched before speaking. “Actually, I was a little afraid to try. After we went home last night I kept thinking I might have forgotten to mix in that second cup of sugar.”

  Joy laughed. “Oh, no, you got it in there. These are delicious and so gooey, especially if you zap them for a few seconds in the microwave.” She took another bite, leaving a smudge of chocolate on her upper lip. “They’re just the way I love them.”

  She looked adorable and the happiest he’d seen her since he’d returned to the valley. Maybe she was getting used to having him around again, or maybe that was wishful thinking and she’d just had too much sugar this morning.

  “I wanted to thank you and Bella again for having me and the boys over last night. If it weren’t for you, we would have been up until the wee hours of the morning baking and probably setting off the smoke detector. Tyler and Jordan had a great time.” He paused and held her gaze. “I enjoyed it, too.”

  Joy tucked a loose strand of hair behind her ear and smiled. “It was fun. The children seemed to get along really well.”

  “I think we did, too.” He threw a quick wink in her direction. “Seriously, though, it was kind of you to help me out. Since we moved, I feel as though I’m still struggling to get us settled, so you really came to our rescue.”

  “That’s what neighbors do here—help each other. Small-town living isn’t for everyone, but I can’t imagine being anywhere else.” She gazed around the cafeteria.

  “Speaking of helping out, Jordan is so excited for his lesson tonight. As soon as he woke up, he started talking nonstop about it.”

  A smile parted Joy’s lips. “Funny, it was the first thing I thought about when I woke up this morning, too. I’m really looking forward to it myself.”

  Nick’s heart was full. Being back in his childhood community, surrounded by people who really cared about one another, was beginning to make him feel whole again. Moving was definitely one of the best decisions he’d made in a long time. If he were being honest with himself and with Joy, he was actually as excited about tonight as Jordan.

  Chapter Five

  Later that evening, Joy glanced at the quartz clock hanging on her bathroom wall—six forty-five. Fifteen minutes—that was all the time she had to make herself presentable. Judging by her reflection in the mirror, she’d need more like one hour and fifteen minutes. This morning at the bake sale, after speaking with Nick, her excitement about giving Jordan his first lesson had ramped up a couple of notches. She couldn’t deny the fact that spending the evening with the Capello men was a nice change from her typical Friday night—home alone with a bowl of popcorn and a Hallmark movie. After school, she’d stopped by to visit Faith, who’d been thrilled to hear about her sister’s plans this evening. At six thirty, Joy had found herself racing through the front door like a wild woman and running late.

  She reached for her comb and raked it through her tangled hair. Outside, the northwest winds were howling, so she opted to go with a loose ponytail. During the bake sale, the twins had begged her to come over for Chinese food before the piano lesson. She doubted Nick was too keen on the idea, but he had suggested she arrive at seven o’clock. She’d only agreed for Jordan’s sake. He seemed so happy about the lessons. After learning of their mother’s death, Joy felt a need to protect the twins. Jordan seemed extra sensitive, though. He was a special child who was beginning to occupy more space in her heart, which wasn’t a good thing, given he was Nick’s son.

  Fifteen minutes later, dressed in black jeans and a yellow turtleneck sweater, Joy pulled on her coat and headed across the street. Never in her wildest dreams had she thought Nick Capello would be living a stone’s throw from her own house.

  As she climbed the front porch steps of the quaint Cape Cod home, she paused when she heard laughter and voices coming from the other side of the door...the sounds of a happy family enjoying time together. Her heart squeezed when she realized anyone standing outside of her front door would only hear silence. No family resided within her walls. She’d come to terms with the fact that this was something that would never change, but still, swells of doubt and fear carried the reminder of what could have been.

  Her gentle knock ignited a firestorm of cheers and the squeaking of tennis shoes across the hardwood floor. When the door whipped open, Jordan and Tyler stood grinning from ear to ear.

  “Miss Kellihuh!” Jordan lunged toward Joy and wrapped his arms around her waist. Her knees went weak and she wished he’d never let go.

  “We’ve been waiting for you. We wanted to show you our room,” Tyler said as he reached for her hand and pulled her inside.

  “You’ve got quite the fan club living under this roof.” Nick stood across the foyer wearing a casual smile and a crisp white shirt that drew her attention to his broad shoulders.

  Joy felt her cheeks warm before quickly turning her attention back to the boys. “Is everything all unpacked?”

  “Come see!” the boys sang out as Maverick jumped and took quick licks on her hand.

  She scanned the inside of the cozy space. They had just moved in. How could there be so much warmth and love already inside of this home? She had lived in her house for years and it was like a hollow shell. It was only a roof over her head—no family memories were being created.

  Jordan and Tyler pulled Joy down the hallway. Her eyes popped when she stepped inside of the twins’ room. Candid framed photographs of the boys covered the walls. She turned to Nick. “Did you take all of these photos?”

  He nodded. “I t
ook up photography about a year ago.”

  Tyler stepped toward Joy. “Our mommy used to take all of the pictures—but she can’t anymore.”

  Silence hung in the air as Joy glanced at Nick. His face flushed as he raked his hand through his hair.

  Joy strolled around the room, appreciating each shot. “These really look like they were done by a professional.” She stopped in front of the photo of the boys and a strikingly beautiful young woman. With golden blond hair that skimmed her shoulders, her smile lit up her pale blue eyes. The photo had to have been taken before she got ill. Joy’s stomach twisted when she realized it was their mother. The three were sitting in a pile of vibrant, colorful autumn leaves. Jordan and Tyler were laughing as they both looked up at their mom. The picture radiated love—they adored her...and now she was gone.

  She decided not to comment on that photo, but instead moved on and laughed at the picture of the boys covered in paint with their mother standing nearby with her hands on her hips. Her body language indicated she was upset by the mess, but her smile told a different story. “You two look like you were having fun.”

  Jordan stepped toward the photograph and placed his tiny hand on the frame. “That was the last pictuwe of me and Tyler with our mommy.” His lower lip quivered.

  A hush blanketed the room as the four stood staring at the wall. The sound of the doorbell chiming broke the silence.

  “There’s the food. Let’s go eat—I’m starving.” Nick spoke in an upbeat tone, an obvious attempt to lighten the mood.

  Tyler tore from the room and his father followed behind. Joy glanced down at Jordan, whose eyes remained fixated on his mother. “Are you hungry, sweetie?”

  Jordan nodded and placed his hand in hers. At that moment, a pebble from the wall Joy had built around her heart broke free.

  An hour later with only one egg roll remaining on the plate, Joy pushed herself away from the table and began to clear the dishes.

  Nick sprang to his feet. “Not so fast. We don’t allow our guests to do manual labor in this house.”

  Joy laughed and carried the dishes to the kitchen sink. “It’s the least I can do after you graciously invited me for dinner.” The past hour had been like her dreams on most nights—laughing and sharing stories at the dinner table with her family. Of course, she needed no reminder that real life was never like her dreams. She’d come to accept it, but it didn’t make it any less painful.

  “Is it time for our lesson, Miss Kellihuh?” Jordan came to the sink carrying his plate.

  She looked down and smiled. “That’s nice of you to help me.” Joy took the dish and ran it under the warm water. “We can start the lesson as soon as I finish up here.”

  “Nonsense. Tyler and I will take care of these. You two go get started.” Nick stepped beside Joy and turned off the faucet. His spicy cologne teased her nose.

  “I’ll go get my music book,” Jordan announced as he raced from the kitchen. Tyler trailed behind in a probable attempt to avoid helping with the dishes.

  Nick turned to Joy. “I’m surprised he ate any dinner. He’s been so excited about this lesson.”

  “I’ve been excited, too. He’s such a compassionate little boy,” Joy said as she reached inside of her tote bag sitting on the counter and pulled out some of her own sheet music.

  “He’s always been more sensitive than Tyler.”

  “Can I ask you something, Nick?” Joy hesitated for a moment, not wanting to overstep her boundaries, but she had to know.

  “Of course.”

  “After your wife passed away, did the boys receive any counseling to help them understand what was happening?” Joy noticed Nick’s jaw tighten. “I’m sorry. It’s none of my business... Forget I asked.”

  Nick nodded as he loaded the dishes into the dishwasher. “It’s okay. Yes, they did. According to the school counselor, Tyler did better than Jordan.”

  Joy wasn’t surprised by that statement. “How so?”

  “She said he wouldn’t talk. Anything she asked him, he just sat there staring at the ground.”

  Joy’s heart squeezed. She knew the pain of losing a parent, but she’d been so young when her parents were killed in a car crash. She only remembered snippets about them, like pieces of edited film, scattered on the floor. “Do you think maybe he senses that you’re uncomfortable discussing his mother?” The hum of the refrigerator filled the silence.

  “Jordan is waiting for you,” he croaked.

  Her stomach squeezed. “I’m sorry, Nick.” She turned on her heel and headed into the living room. It was no wonder Jordan seemed open to talking about his mother with her. He obviously felt he couldn’t talk to his father. Perhaps Jordan thought it would make his daddy too sad. Whatever the case, she couldn’t help but wonder if there was something else Nick was refusing to bring up.

  A half an hour into the lesson, Joy realized Jordan’s skills were much more advanced than she had expected. “You’re really very good. I think maybe you could give me lessons.”

  Jordan giggled and squirmed on the oak bench. “Thank you, but you’re pwobably ten times better than me. But I’m going to keep pwacticing, even if Tyler thinks it’s silly.”

  “I’m happy to hear you say that. It’s important not to let others steal your joy. I hope you’ll remember that.” Of course, each day she needed to remind herself, but it was a constant battle.

  “I will—I pwomise.” He turned to Joy and looked up. “Miss Kellihuh, how come you don’t have any kids? You’d be a weally good mommy.”

  Joy knew he didn’t mean any harm with his innocent question, but his words were like daggers shredding her heart into pieces. “It wasn’t in God’s plans, sweetheart.”

  “Was it God’s plan to take my mommy away fwom me?” He bit his lower lip. “Why would He do something so mean?”

  Joy was the last person to explain why God allowed terrible things to happen to good people. Of course, in her case, maybe He didn’t think she was good. She had made the choice to get in the car with Scotty. But Jordan wasn’t talking about her. He was referring to his mother. “Oh, sweetheart, God wasn’t trying to be mean to you. I know it’s hard to understand, but bad things do happen in this world. We have to trust that God knows what He’s doing and somehow He will bring some good from the situation.” By the expression on Jordan’s face, he was as confused as she was.

  “But I pwayed—a lot. She was always in the bathwoom and she kept getting skinnior. I asked God to make huh bettuh...but He didn’t listen.”

  “Jordan!”

  Maverick barked as Nick’s voice echoed from the foyer. He’d been listening.

  “It’s okay... We were just talking,” Joy explained as she took notice of the pain in Nick’s eyes while Jordan quivered against her arm.

  “I think it’s time to say good-night,” Nick said.

  “But, Daddy, what about my lesson? You pwomised me.”

  Nick rubbed the back of his neck. “It’s getting late.” He obviously wanted her to leave.

  Joy stood. “We’ll finish up another day, sweetie. Don’t you worry.” She glanced at her watch. “I’m a little tired, anyway.”

  Twenty minutes later, following a quick shower, Joy settled into her favorite comfy chair, in the corner of her bedroom. As she sipped her cup of chamomile tea, she wondered how an evening that had begun with laughter and good food had come to an abrupt end. The expression on Jordan’s face when she’d exited the house left her heartbroken. No words were uttered by Nick...not even a good-night. With his arms folded across his chest and his face expressionless, she couldn’t help but think maybe she’d been wrong about the happy family living behind the walls of the Capello house.

  * * *

  Tuesday afternoon Nick inhaled a deep breath before entering the school’s auditorium. Since Friday night, he’d done his best to avoid running into Jo
y. More like hide from her. Saturday morning, while out on his front porch watering his pots of pansies that seemed to thrive in the winter sunlight, he’d spotted her car cruising down the street. He’d slipped inside and watched from the window as she’d pulled into her driveway and begun to unload her groceries.

  There’d been a part of him that had longed to go over and help her as she made multiple trips in and out of her house. But he hadn’t been quite ready to face her again and risk having to explain his behavior. He couldn’t blame her for practically running out of his house after he’d snapped when he’d heard the conversation she’d been having with Jordan. It wasn’t her fault. She’d been doing what was in her nature...listening. Poor Jordan had spent the rest of the evening in his room in tears, while Nick had tried to prepare for his upcoming interview, to no avail. He knew he’d been wrong to react like he had. Hearing his son talk about his sick mother had washed in another wave of guilt. It had broken his heart to see Jordan so sad, but especially his questioning of God’s will.

  “Daddy!” Tyler ran down the aisle with his arms flailing.

  Nick’s stomach twisted when he saw the look of fear in his son’s eyes. “What is it, Tyler—what’s wrong?”

  “It’s Jordan... He said he doesn’t want to be in the play.”

  That couldn’t be. Just the other day, he’d seemed so excited. Unlike his brother, he didn’t want a leading role. But he’d seemed thrilled to be cast as a mushroom, especially when he found out Mrs. Buser planned to make his costume. She was the best seamstress in town.

  Nick scanned the stage and spied Jordan sitting alone on a folding chair. “I’ll go see what’s up. Don’t worry, bud.” With a deep breath, he scaled the steps leading to the stage and crossed the polished wood floors. “Jordan, you okay, buddy?”

  He nodded and wiped his cheek.

  A ripple of guilt seeped over Nick as he noticed the same sad look in Jordan’s eyes that he’d seen the other night. Protecting his sons from pain and heartbreak had become his number one priority since their mother had passed away. But why hadn’t it been before? Why hadn’t he protected their mother and sought out proper treatment for her? He’d been too self-absorbed. His stomach tightened as he squatted down in front of his son. “Jordan, talk to me, please.” He brushed his son’s hair away from his eyes. “Tyler said you don’t want to be in the play. I thought you were excited about it?” Just last night, he’d overheard the boys giggling in their room as Tyler practiced his lines.