Blaine

by Katie Dowe

  “I told him he was suffocating me,” Skylar told her friend. The woman looked at her in shock and Skylar told her what else she'd said to him.

  “Honey, why would you say something like that?”

  “Because I was out of my freaking mind!” She got up abruptly and started pacing again. “I actually told my husband that I resent the fact that he loves me so much! Most women would kill for a man to love her like that but, oh no! Not me. I am so selfish and stupid that I took the love of a good man and ground it underneath my shoes.” She came back over to the bed and sat back down. “What am I going to do, Del?”

  “You're going to apologize.”

  “I tried and he's not picking up his phone. I left several voice messages and he hasn't responded.” She twisted her hands together and her wedding rings caught her eyes. “We haven't been married three weeks and I already managed to drive him away from me. Who was I kidding, Del? I'm not cut out for marriage and I should have known that! Look at my history. My mother's been married three times and my aunt never got married. I saw the signs and didn't heed them. I'm not the wife type and I should never have done it!” She buried her head in her hands. “Oh God! What am I going to do?”

  “You're going to pull yourself together and do whatever it takes to make him know you're sorry,” her friend told her firmly. That man loves you honey, and he isn't going to stay mad forever.”

  Skylar jumped as her phone rang. She stared at Deloris for a moment, not knowing what to do.

  “Answer it. It just might be him.”

  Skylar raced to get her purse and pulled out her phone, her face lighting up as she realized that it was indeed him, “Blaine I've been calling—”

  She listened for a moment. “I'm glad you are okay. Did you get my messages?”

  She listened and then hung up.

  “What did he say?”

  Skylar came over and sat down on the chair. “He told me he was fine and that he was in meetings for the entire day. He told me he was extending his trip until next week Monday and that he would stay in touch.”

  “That’s good, right?”

  Skylar heaved a sigh and shook her head. “His tone was like that of a stranger. I have a feeling that he was deliberately extending the trip to stay away from me longer. I think I've lost my husband.”

  *****

  “I had no idea that you were in town,” Blaine greeted the man enthusiastically. “It’s good to see a familiar face here. What are you doing in town?”

  “Business trip,” Bradley Wellington sized up his friend curiously. “How are you, man?”

  “Why don’t we talk over a bottle of whiskey?” He signaled the waiter over and placed the order. “You're not hungry are you?”

  “I just had lunch,” Bradley told him. “I was meeting with a couple of associates who wanted to resurrect an old building. I keep telling Leesa that I've retired but I cannot fully stay at home and do nothing. My wife knows who I am so she puts up with it.”

  “I think I made a mistake in getting married,” Blaine told him.

  “What?” Bradley looked at the man in shock.

  Blaine waited until the man had placed the bottle and glasses in front of them on the table before continuing. “I was never cut out to be a husband.” He poured the whiskey into the glasses, adding a generous amount to his. “You know my history.”

  “And you rose above that. What’s going on?”

  Blaine drank too fast and almost choked as the fiery liquid burned his throat. He'd been at the hotel in Boston for the past three days and he hadn't gotten one good night's sleep. He'd spent the nights playing his wife’s words over and over in his head and found it difficult to sleep. “I fell in love too hard.”

  “There's no such thing as falling in love too hard, so try again.”

  “There is.” Blaine toyed with his glass. “I've never had the love of parents. Any decent therapist would tell you that that's the first relationship you form. Parents/child relationship. The love of parents towards the child and vice versa.” He shrugged. “I never had that and therein lay the problem. I was denied that and when I met Sky I poured everything I had into loving her and in doing that I overwhelmed her with my emotions.” He finished the drink and poured some more.

  “Nothing's wrong with loving someone to the point where it overflows. I feel that way about Leesa.” Bradley stared at his friend in concern.

  “I call Sky every few minutes and I want to be with her every single minute. That, my friend, is not natural.”

  “I'm here with you looking at your ugly mug and I want to be with my wife and we've been married for several years well,” Bradley told him.

  “I bet you don't call her every single time.”

  “No I don’t but that’s because I've been married for years. You, on the other hand, haven't hit three weeks.”

  “I'm giving her space.”

  “That's not a very good idea.”

  “I'm drowning, man, and I have to get a hold of the churning emotions inside me before they destroy us both. I have to find a way to control them and put up boundaries.”

  “And I'm telling you that it's not a good idea,” Bradley insisted. “Talk to her and get your feelings out in the open.”

  “I've already done that and I have a feeling that it's too open.” He finished the drink and reached for the bottle. Bradley stopped him.

  “You've already had enough.”

  “You're right.”

  “When are you leaving?”

  “I'm staying some extra days.”

  “To avoid her?”

  “To sort myself out,” Blaine said grimly. “I need to get back some control.”

  *****

  “Honey how nice to see you!” Skylar's aunt hugged her tightly as she came into the living room. “I was just making myself some tea. Would you like some?”

  Skylar shook her head and went with her into the kitchen. It was a sunny afternoon, the weather very mild for spring. It was Friday afternoon and Skylar had decided to come and visit her aunt as she didn't relish going home to her empty apartment. Blaine had called her a total of three times since he'd been away and had sounded as if he was talking to an associate. She had no idea what to do.

  “How is that husband of yours?” Grace asked as she poured the water over the pouch.

  “I think I've broken the record for having the shortest marriage in history,” Skylar told her with a short laugh.

  “Honey, what’s wrong?”

  Skylar told her.

  “My dear.” Grace sat opposite her and cradled her cup of tea. “Have you told him you're sorry?”

  “Several times, but I don’t think what I said can be fixed with an apology, Aunt Grace. I know his history. I know that his parents never showed him love and I did the same thing. I threw his love back in his face and for what? I could have handled the situation differently and I didn't.”

  “You are human—”

  “You think that makes it any less damaging?” Skylar cried. “I told him that he was suffocating me. I can't imagine what that must have done to him. I don’t know how to fix it and I have a feeling that it's something that can't be fixed.”

  “That’s not true and you know it,” her aunt said firmly. “Granted, what you said was damaging but I've seen the way that man looks at you and he loves you. A love like that can't die just like that. It's going to take some time, but you'll get there.”

  “I don’t believe that,” she said wearily. “I really don’t.”

  *****

  “Mother, I really don’t have time for a long lunch.” Skylar had thought about not accepting the invitation to meet her for lunch but the woman had insisted and she didn't have the strength to put up any arguments now. Blaine was due back today and had told her that he would see her later at the apartment. She had no idea what that meant but she had every intention of going home early and making dinner for them. She had no idea what would happen after that but she was hoping fo
r the best. She'd been without him for almost a week and she felt as if the best part of her had died.

  “I know darling, but I haven't seen you in a while.” Delia Thomas looked different somehow and wasn't dressed in her usual flamboyantly expensive manner but was instead wearing a tasteful red-and-white polka dot skirt suit and her hair in a neat chignon at the nape of her neck. “How are you and that handsome husband of yours?”

  Skylar looked at her sharply, wondering why she'd asked. “We're fine.”

  “I was thinking that Morris and I could have you over for dinner next weekend,” she said as she dug into her salad.

  “I'm not sure of our plans.”

  Delia looked at her daughter. “I'm trying here, darling.”

  “I think it's years too late for that, Mother.” She bit off a sigh at the injured look on her mother’s face. “I'm sorry, that uncalled called for. I'll let you know if we're available.”

  “I would appreciate that.” She reached out and touched her daughter’s hand briefly. “This is just my way of saying how sorry I am for all those years when I wasn't there for you.”

  Skylar stared at her for a moment, wondering if she could believe her and then nodded. “Thanks for reaching out.”

  “When I saw you and Blaine at the wedding I realized that you got a very good man and I'm so happy for you,” she said softly.

  Skylar felt the meal lodge in her throat and had to make a supreme effort to swallow. “Thank you,” she said hoarsely. She pushed away her half-eaten meal. “I really have to go, Mother.”

  “I hope to see you next week, darling.”

  Skylar nodded. “I'll let you know.”

  She hurried out of the restaurant and went into her car to sit for a moment, staring out at nothing. Her eyes fixed on a squirrel as it raced up a tree and raced back down to nibble at something at the root of it before racing away again. It had been a week since she'd been without her husband, a week that she'd had to go to work and pretend that she was okay only to go back to her apartment and walk around it, torturing herself with the words she'd said to him. She'd twisted in her bed because he wasn't in it and could smell the scent of his aftershave each time she went to take a shower. She started the engine and backed out of the lot. Tonight she had a lot of making up to do.

  *****

  Blaine came slowly into the kitchen and stood just inside the doorway, watching her as she sliced the pie he'd smelled as soon as he opened the door. He'd noticed the table set and knew what she was doing.

  “Hey.” She left what she was doing and came over to put her arms around his neck. “I missed you.”

  “I missed you too.” He could not control the reaction of his body to hers and he resigned himself to it. “Something smells good.”

  “Lamb chops with garlic sauce and mushrooms. I hope you're hungry.”

  “I am.” He smiled slightly and kissing her lightly on her lips he moved out of her arms. “What can I do?”

  *****

  Skylar stifled the panic and went back to cutting the pie. “The wine as usual.”

  He took the bucket into the dining room and placed it on the table and then came back into the kitchen to help carry the rest of the things in. He pulled out the chair for her automatically before taking his seat.

  “How was the trip?” she asked.

  “Productive,” he said briefly as he passed her the salad bowl.

  Skylar floundered as she wondered what else to say. In the past they never had difficulty having a conversation, but something had changed and she had no idea what to do to fix it. “I had a new customer walk in yesterday.”

  “Yeah?” He stared at her as he drank his wine.

  “She was there on referral from an old customer of mine and was determined to spend as much money as she could.”

  “That’s very nice.”

  Skylar nodded and waited for him to say something else. “I'm sorry, Blaine.”

  He put his glass down and looked at her. “I know.”

  “I want things to go back the way they were before,” she pleaded.

  “I don’t.” He surprised her by saying. He sighed at the fear that must have shown on her face. “I don’t want to ever feel that way again. I was spinning out of control with the emotions I felt for you and it was drowning me. I can just imagine what it was doing to you. I'm glad we had that argument when we did, Sky, because it showed me myself and it was not a pretty sight.”

  “Blaine, please don’t talk like that.”

  “I love you, no doubt about that but we both need our individuality and I get that now.” His eyes wandered over her face. “I don’t love you any less, I just need to step back a little.”

  “And if I don’t want that?” Skylar felt as if she was falling into a murky patch of water where she wasn't able to see anything or breathe.

  “You do,” he said firmly as he pushed away his meal. “You've been independent for all your life and then I came along and that changed almost overnight. We can love each other without crowding each other.” He got to his feet. “If you'll excuse me the flight was long and I'm tired. Thanks for the meal.” He smiled at her faintly as he left the room.

  Skylar stared after him and sat there not knowing what to do next. Usually he would help her to clear the table and they would do the dishes together. There would be laughing and a lot of playing going on, which would turn into him taking her into his arms and kissing her. Now she'd sat across the table from a polite stranger who'd told her that he loved her, but it was different. She'd thought she wanted different but she wanted the old Blaine back! She got up and put away the rest of the meal and then slowly washed the dishes and tidied the kitchen before going into the bedroom. He'd already taken a shower and was in bed, propped up on the pillows with a document in his hands. He was dressed in t-shirt and pajama bottoms, which had never happened before. He didn't look at her as she came into the room and she had to take a steadying breath as she went to change out of her clothes. She slipped into a thin lime-green nightgown with layers of rich lace at the bodice and was transparent at the bottom. She deliberately didn't put on panties and was determined that no matter what happened she was making love with her husband tonight.

  Let’s see how unattached he could be when he was inside her!

  She climbed onto the bed and when he still didn't look at her she reached over and took the folder from his hands, forcing him to look at her.

  “We haven't been with each other for a week,” she told him lightly as she propped her head on her hand to look at him. “I would like a proper greeting.”

  “You're right.” A smile came and went on his lips. “Is that new?” he asked as he looked at the plunge in the nightgown.

  “Yes,” she whispered, reaching across and sliding her hand underneath his shirt and feeling the warmth of his skin. She smiled as she felt his quiver. He eased up onto the pillows and pulled the shirt over his head, giving her access to his bare flesh. She let her fingers wander over his muscled chest and up to his nipple, letting her nail graze it before going down to where the pajama pants rode loosely just below his waist. She sat up and pulled them down, almost sighing as his erection sprang free. He wasn't wearing underwear; he never put them on after showering when he was heading to bed. Maybe one thing hadn't changed. She wrapped a hand around his thick penis and watched as it sprang to life immediately. Her head lifted and she stared at him. He couldn't mask the raw emotions that came over his face and she had a feeling that he'd tried but failed. His dark green eyes held hers and a groan escaped his lips as she ran her hand up and down the length of him. “Tell me what you want,” she whispered.

  He didn't answer immediately and she used her fingernail to circle the head of his penis, lingering over the opening there. “Blaine?”

  “I want you, dammit!” he gritted.

  “You have me.” He reared up in shock as she bent her head and took him fully inside her mouth.

  “Christ!” He moaned as she used h
er tongue to savor him slowly. His hands clenched into fists when her tongue swirled around the tip of his penis. He felt as if the top of his head was going to explode. His body moved up into her mouth in a desperate attempt to get his release but she wasn't having that and was determined to direct the pace. “I can’t—”he muttered feverishly as she put pressure on his testicles and moved her mouth over his shaft. With a muttered oath he reached down and pulled her up to him, his breathing ragged as he stared at her. “You made your point,” he said hoarsely.

  “I'm happy I did.” She climbed over him and as she sank over his dick she felt him shuddered as he pushed deep into her. He brought her closer to him and reached for her breasts, gripping them in his hands before bending forward to take a stiff nipple inside his mouth. He tugged on it hard and she had a feeling that he was punishing her for what she'd done to him just now. But she didn't mind one bit. She arched her back and gave in to the lash of passion that threatened to overwhelm them.

  Chapter 13

  But things hadn't changed as she hoped. She'd thought that after that intense night they'd shared that things would have gone back to normal, but she was wrong. She'd woken up the next morning to see him already in the kitchen dressed and drinking coffee. He looked up as she came into the kitchen and pointed to the coffee pot. He'd made love to her twice and had held her in his arms after.

  “You're up early,” she poured the coffee into her go cup and screwed the top on. “I have a meeting with the Mayor and then I have to go look at a block of apartments.” He hesitated. “I might be home late.”

  “How late?”

  He shrugged as he finished his coffee and got to his feet. “I'll let you know.” He went to put his cup into the sink and left without rinsing it out. Usually she would point it out to him but she knew they were no longer in that place. He walked by her and stopped to rub her shoulder briefly. “Eat something.”

  “Blaine?” her voice stopped him at the door.

  “Yeah?” he said, turning to look at her.