Cowboy Summer
Page 5
He hated long, serious talks. And these days, he didn’t much like the future, either.
Canting one hip, Molly gave him a flirty smile and nodded toward the barn.
“Looks like our little plan worked.”
“Of course it worked.” He made a pistol with his finger and pointed it her way. “You’re a devious woman, Molly Bailey.”
“Oh, pshaw.” She waved a plump, pretty hand in the air. Dimples blossomed when she smiled, and darn if she didn’t look as pretty as a spring heifer sleeping in the sun. “I just know how women think. Jess was too proud to come back home, especially after Cade got into that mess of a marriage. She needed a reason to come, and we gave her one.”
“So here she is. Now what are we going to do with her?” Heck sighed. “I told you, her mother poisoned her mind when it comes to ranching. She’ll go back to the city soon as she can kick off her boots.”
“It all depends on Cade.” Molly glanced out the window toward the barn. “I think she’ll stay in the end. You know they’re meant to be together. And that girl belongs here, in a way I never will.”
“I always thought so, but she thought different.”
“Well, I’ll just egg her on by leaving these brochures where she’ll see ’em.” She fanned a handful of pamphlets from various retirement communities in a half circle on the table. “There. Just a little nudge.”
Heck reached over and grabbed one, holding it up to show its dog-eared cover. “Is this the one you like? What’s it called, Moony Mind Manor?” He flipped through the pages, scene after scene of old fogies having what passed for fun in the so-called twilight years. “I’m thinking you’d like this place.”
“Now, honey, it’s Sunset Acres. And those pamphlets are just props for the plan.” The dimples bloomed again, but he thought he caught a shadow behind that smile. “You know it’s just to get Jess home. Once she and Cade get back together, you’ll have a son-in-law to help you, and we won’t ever think about retirement again.”
“And if they don’t?”
She looked away, a frown flitting across her face before she caught herself and smiled. “We’ll cross that bridge when we come to it.”
“Not the bridge to this place.” He glanced at the cover, grunted with disdain, and tossed it back on the table. “Can’t imagine living there.”
“I know, honey.” She slipped the pamphlet in with the others, straightening her display. “But lots of people do.”
“I s’pose.” He glanced out at the barn. “Jess didn’t seem all that happy to see Cade. Holding back, I’d say.”
“She’s hurt. You and I were surprised he married Amber Lynn, so just imagine how Jess felt.”
“Doesn’t matter. He caught his mistake, and the coast is clear. Girl ought to jump at a second chance with him.”
“It’s smart to be careful. Make sure that little sneak’s really gone for good.” Molly bit her lower lip. “I wasn’t going to say anything, but I saw Amber Lynn’s car over there earlier. She must’ve heard Jess was coming home, gone to stake her claim.”
“Cade ought to run that woman off,” Heck said. “She dang near ruined his life.”
“He’s too softhearted. Cade’s a good man.”
“Be better if he was a smart one.”
Smiling as if he’d made a joke, Molly headed back to the kitchen. But Heck knew he was right. Cade had been manipulated up, down, and sideways by a woman, and now Heck wondered if the same might be happening to his own self. Molly’s plan to get Jess to come back was brilliant, but it was also devious, underhanded, and manipulative. If his new wife ever turned that mind toward Heck himself, he’d be wrapped around her pretty fingers before he knew what hit him.
Maybe he already was. Maybe the plan wasn’t about his daughter at all. It had been, at first—he was pretty sure. But once he’d had that heart attack, Molly started getting awfully serious about those brochures. When the dust cleared, he was afraid his daughter would be back in the city and he really would be living at Sunset Acres.
It all depended on Cade.
“You go, Son,” he muttered under his breath. “Don’t blow it.”
* * *
Cade crouched in the barn’s wide entryway, rubbing Boogy’s furry chest and trying to imagine the Diamond Jack belonging to anyone but the Baileys. He couldn’t.
He could imagine Jess naked, though. Matter of fact, he couldn’t seem to stop.
Twisting his shoulders, he tried to wriggle off the hay that had drifted down his collar. Finally, he tugged the T-shirt over his head and used it to slap at his shoulders. Savoring the cool air, he dried the sheen of sweat that glossed his back and chest, tossed the shirt to the ground, and bent at the waist, shaking his head and running his fingers through his hair. More hay showered into the dirt.
“So you still take cowboy showers.”
He looked up to see Jess standing right where they’d tumbled together just an hour before. He’d relived that encounter with every bale he’d stacked, revising it in his head, trying out different responses. In his mind, he was one suave and clever cowboy. In real life, not so much.
“Molly and Dad said thanks for taking care of the hay. Me, too.” She bent down and scratched Boogy’s ears. “Plus, I need to talk to you.”
He felt uncomfortable standing there bare-chested, but the shirt, damp with sweat, was too disgusting to wear. Tossing it over a stall door, he grabbed his hat from a peg on the wall and clapped it on his head, tugging the brim low over his eyes. A man didn’t feel so naked with his hat on.
Jess perched on a hay bale just inside the wide barn doors. She looked tense, like a lark on a fence post, ready to take flight at the slightest threat.
Boogy trotted over and sat on her foot.
Good dog, Boogy.
“So what did you want to talk about?” he asked.
Avoiding his eyes, she stroked the dog’s ears. “Molly said you won’t work for Daddy.”
Boogy threw his head back, letting his tongue flop out the side of his mouth, grinning his toothy grin. Jess smiled back, and Cade vowed to give the mutt a treat when they got home.
“I do what I can,” he said. “It’s just that I’ve got all the work I can handle at home.”
“Your place keeps you that busy?”
Did she have to sound so surprised?
“I didn’t see any cattle in your fields, so I thought…”
“I quit the cattle business.” He sat down beside her, close but not too close. Resting his elbows on his knees, he clasped his hands and carefully looked away. Calming body language worked for horses; he hoped it would calm Jess, too.
“I work over at the Vee Bar now and then, but mostly I’m training horses. Cutting’s big these days, and team roping. I take on mounts for clients and have a few prospects of my own. There’s a good market these days for all-around ranch horses.” Hat or no hat, he still felt naked, so he tugged it down to hide his eyes. “Your dad helped. He used a couple geldings I trained as pickup horses at Wynott Days. They performed like aces, got me a lot of business.”
“It figures Amber Lynn wouldn’t want a farmer for a husband.”
“The change was my choice, not Amber Lynn’s.” He kept his tone mild, but it wasn’t easy. “I had to do something. She left a lot of bills behind.”
Jess turned, blinking as if she’d just stepped into the sun. “She left bills behind?”
“Yeah.” He wondered why she’d be surprised. Everybody knew how Amber Lynn was with money. “I wish I could do more for your dad, but she had a pile of maxed-out credit cards when we—you know.”
He couldn’t say when we got married. Not to Jess.
“She hasn’t paid a dime since she left, so I’m working pretty hard.” He stared down at the scuffed toes of his boots. “I help your dad when I can, but I wish I could do more.”
Jess was still blinking. She spoke in a strangled voice. “Did you say since she left?”
“Yeah. Since the divorce.”
“Divorce?” She stared at him, openmouthed, and the facts clicked together in his head. He understood her reluctance now, her anger, the new awkwardness between them.
She didn’t know.
She didn’t know about the divorce.
His heart leapt so high, he had to swallow so it wouldn’t jump out and land in her lap. He pictured it dancing a joyful rhumba there, turning cartwheels.
“I thought you knew,” he said. “I tried to call, but then—I figured somebody’d tell you.”
“I don’t really see anybody from home. I’m always at work.” She shook her head. “What happened?”
“She said I was always working. I didn’t talk enough, she said, or show her affection. According to her, I wasn’t cut out to share my life with another person. So she found somebody else, carried on with him behind my back. When I found out, well…”
Jess glanced at him, then stared out at the prairie, blinking as if she was holding back tears.
Dang it, maybe Amber Lynn was right. He wasn’t good at sharing. He should have tried harder, left a message—but he’d pictured a sleek answering machine piping his voice into Jess’s city apartment, and he just couldn’t do it. He wasn’t sure it would be welcome.
It had been easier to let it drop, let fate take its course, and hope somehow, someday, they’d see each other again.
Well, someday was here. And he’d better make the most of it.
Chapter 7
The brim of Cade’s cowboy hat hung low over his eyes, which left Jess staring at a shred of hay caught in the blond hairs strewn across his chest. It gleamed in the sunlight that poured through the window, and her fingertips itched to flick it away.
Once, she’d touched this man every day. She’d worn his love like an old shirt, casual and comfortable. The trouble was, she’d treated him like an old shirt, too.
They’d been friends since childhood, then lovers, together so long, it had been hard to tell where she ended and he began. She’d chafed at that and felt trapped by everyone’s assumption that she’d marry him, stay in Wynott forever. She’d wanted to see the world—or at least Denver. And she’d started to wonder who she’d be without him.
Well, she’d found out. She was the same person she’d always been—only lonelier. She compared every man she met to Cade Walker, and every one came up short. But once he’d married Amber Lynn, it was too late to change her mind.
Until now.
Holy cats, what was she going to do? She wasn’t ready for this. She’d come home to help her father, and now…
“Well, I ought to go.” He stood and stretched, stepping out into the sunshine. “You probably want to spend your time with your dad.”
Oh God. She’d been staring at him with her mouth hanging open for how long? She wasn’t sure. But she probably looked like a sun-stroked calf.
Rising, she joined him. “I’ve got lots of time.”
Her voice came out husky. She sounded like the kind of woman who dragged men to the hayloft and ravished them. Come to think of it, she’d been that kind of woman a time or two. But that wasn’t a good idea now.
Was it?
She scanned his face and caught that shattered look in his eyes again. Maybe he’d loved Amber Lynn. Did he miss her? Had he found something in her he hadn’t gotten from Jess? Amber Lynn had always been sexy and wild, a sleek cat to Jess’s big-eyed, clueless fawn. That fawn had been a complete innocent when she and Cade had first made love. He’d had to teach her everything she knew.
He hadn’t had much experience either, but they’d figured things out. The thought sparked a smile, and she reached out, running the back of her fingers down his chest and knocking that bit of hay to the ground. It was a gesture from the past, the ghost of an old habit come to life. He took her hand and held it, gazing into her eyes.
If she was going to resurrect old habits, she might as well dig up the fun ones. Tilting her head ever so slightly, she licked her lips. It was a question without words, and he answered.
He didn’t use words, either.
The moment their lips touched, her world rushed away as if they were streaming into the past on a runaway train. Old fears surfaced and pressed the brakes, but memory raced on, rushing backward in a blur.
He’s changed. He’s been married, divorced. He’s not yours anymore. And Molly saw Amber Lynn’s car. Wasn’t that just now? Or did I dream that?
Brakes, brakes, brakes, but the train sped on. Nothing mattered but the smooth, slow glide of his tongue, the warmth of his mouth, the press of his lips on hers. And his body—that body!—pressed to her own, making her feel all warm and melty.
There was no barn, no hay, no horses. No divorce, no sick father, no stepmom, no job in Denver. Her fear of losing the ranch faded away, and so did Amber Lynn Lyle. There was nothing but Cade in the whole wide world. He filled her empty places, warmed her cold spots, and chased off all her fears.
He kissed her as if he was dying and she was the air he needed to live. She wondered how he could have even looked at Amber Lynn if he felt this way, let alone married her.
The question hauled her up from the warm world of the kiss and tossed her into reality. Twisting in his arms, she tried to free herself, but that brought the unmistakable push of his arousal against her, hard, hot, and demanding. Her determination to push him away somehow transformed into a desperate need to close even the smallest space between them, and the train gathered speed.
When the kiss finally ended, she backed away, tripped over a half-buried rock, and sat down hard against the barn. Dangling her hands in her lap, she let her head drop back against the sunlit wood and gazed up at the sky as if the answers to everything were written in the clouds. He joined her, hands clasped, staring at nothing.
She didn’t know about him, but she was too dazed to speak.
Questions, though. Questions.
“Why Amber Lynn?” She did her best to smile, keep it light. “You knew she was about my least favorite person in the world, right?”
“Yeah.” Letting his hat tilt over his face, he rubbed the back of his neck. “Guess I thought it didn’t matter anymore. Maybe something inside me wanted to punish myself or punish you for leaving. I don’t really know.” He glanced at her, then looked away. “I thought I could finally be like other guys about women.” He swallowed hard. “With you, I was always after forever. I wanted something casual, you know?”
Yeah, she knew. She’d wanted to taste that freedom, too, wanted to care a little less, make love without her whole future twisted in the sheets.
“I didn’t care about a damn thing after you left.” He was studying the horizon as if he needed to memorize the mountains for a test. “Most of my life, things only mattered if they mattered to you.”
She started to speak, but he shook his head.
“I know that isn’t fair, and it might be part of why you left. I hung my whole life on you. Maybe it was too much.”
“No. I just got selfish,” she said. “I wanted casual, too.” She felt her lips tip into a mirthless smile. “It’s overrated, far as I can tell.”
“It sure is. I started to understand my dad—why he drank so hard once my mother was gone.”
“He always drank.”
“He did, but after she died, he drank like he was gunning for the grave.” He shook his head. “I’m not saying that was right, and I always swore I wouldn’t be like him, but you mattered too much when I was sober. So I got drunk. Great coping skills, right?” He plucked a black-eyed Susan from the weeds and stared down at the yellow wheel of petals. “Then Amber Lynn came along.” Avoiding Jess’s gaze, he spoke to the flower. “I don’t know why she wanted me, but she did, and she was relentless.
She went after me like she went after being rodeo queen.”
“Oh crap.” Jess’s sudden laugh surprised them both. “You were doomed, then. She didn’t know a horse’s ass from a big-mouthed bass, but she went after that sash like a tiger on steroids.”
“That sash belonged to you. You rode better than she did, and you did a lot more work behind the scenes, too.”
“Yeah, but she looked better. She was good at fashion and a real whiz with makeup.” Jess shrugged. “Besides, it wasn’t worth it. You wouldn’t believe the underhanded stuff she did. Bubble gum in my hair, salt in my coffee… When I caught her in Buster’s stall, I gave up. I didn’t know what she planned to do, but I cared more about that horse than about riding in some parade.”
“Well, she didn’t put bubble gum in my hair, but she scared me all right. Stalked me, I guess. I’d turn around, and there she’d be, usually half undressed for some reason I never could figure out. Then she followed me home one night, and well…” He pulled a petal from the flower and let it twirl to the ground, then glanced up at her with those eyes. “Men are weak, you know? I thought it was just a fling, but she kept pushing for more. I was about to pull the plug, but then there was the baby.”
Jess’s blood stalled in her veins. “Baby?”
“You didn’t hear about that either? The gossips are slipping up.” He plucked another petal off his flower, then one more. “She said she miscarried after the wedding, but I don’t think it was real.”
“But you believed her. And you married her.”
“Thought I might have a son or a little girl.” A wistful look softened those eyes. “Can you imagine?”
She couldn’t. Not with Amber Lynn. But she’d dreamed of the children she’d have with Cade half her life. Named them even.
Staring down at the fallen petals, he shook his head. “I loved that mythical baby. Dumbass, right?”
She plucked a flower of her own, a daisy. Its petals fanned out, neat and even. Loves me, loves me not. Suddenly, life made sense again.