October Song
Page 48
Bares her teeth and gasps.
Kisses his cold lips.
She half-pushes, half-carries him into a sitting position at the stern.
‘Alistair.’
She keeps repeating his name, like a looped recording. She can’t stop. Can’t let him go. She aches to feel his skin, warm and alive, against hers again. But now there’s just … this cold thing, with a face that looks a bit like his used to, and a sad, slightly worried expression in place of that reckless grin of his, and something empty where the spark in his eyes used to be, and that horrible metal thing sticking obscenely out of him. That thing which she put there. It’s unbearable. It feels like someone tearing her guts and her flesh out from inside her, leaving only a shell of pain.
Seconds is all it had taken. Seconds for this awful, horrible … mistake. If she’d only hesitated. Just for a moment …
‘Alistair.’
For an uncertain time she watches his head lolling on his shoulders with the swell. She runs her fingers through his hair. Traces the faint lines on his face with her fingertips. She had wanted to watch those lines grow deeper. Watch his hair turn as grey as hers is. She wishes it had been her, instead of him. That he’d been the one to carry on. That she’d just jumped in the sea when he’d given her the option.
If she’d done that, they could have shared everything that was left.
She screams. Over and over. She’s not ready for this. She’ll never be ready for this. She lowers him gently, tenderly into the water. His face hangs, ghostly, below the surface. She can’t unfasten her grip on his hand. She just can’t let go: it’s like something magnetic is holding them together. If she lets go, she knows that part of her – perhaps the last part that’s keeping her human – will be ripped out and will sink with him.
But then she’s watching the hand fade to blackness as the weight of the anchor pulls him under, and someone called Alistair Skeates, childhood best friend and twenty-something lover – capable, brave, beautiful, flawed, human Alistair, who loved his boat, and who wanted, in his way, somehow to make a difference, is gone forever.
She stares at the spot where he disappeared. Watches it recede into the distance to merge with the fading land.
She feels like nothing. She is transparent. Like what she used to be has somehow evaporated.
She hasn’t a clue where she will go, or how she can make it there even if she knew. She has hardly any sailing experience, isn’t sure how long her rations or water will last, and is heading into the north Atlantic at a time of year when yachts aren’t meant to be sailing.
She finds she doesn’t care, really. She doesn’t yet know if she wants to live.
She thinks of the islands she’s leaving. Of the tens of millions jostling and wrangling and treading over each other for position in the festering spoil heap that was her home.
She spits over the stern.
Fuck every last one of you.
She turns her back. Focuses on the horizon ahead. It’s getting chilly, so she goes below to put oilskins on.
As she returns to the tiller, tiny snowflakes are drifting from a dead sky.
The End
THANK YOU for reading October Song. If you enjoyed it, I’ve a small request: telling friends and leaving a short review (even just a star rating) would be incredibly helpful. Publicity is a big challenge for independent authors, and your help enabling other readers to discover my books will let me write more for you to enjoy. Leaving a review on Amazon and one on GoodReads would be even more helpful! Many thanks in advance.
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Details of all my other titles are on the next page.
BY RU PRINGLE
October Song
Sanctuary (coming soon)
FATE AND THE WHEEL SERIES
A Time of Ashes
Hunting Gods
The Ice Queen’s Song (coming soon)
Connect online:
https://twitter.com/RuPringle
https://rupringle.com/fiction
https://www.facebook.com/authorrupringle
mailto:ru@rupringle.com
ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS
Many thanks to Seylan Baxter (inspiration as well as a supporter in this one), to John Jarrold, my agent, for invaluable feedback and editing suggestions which went a long way to making this novel what it is, to Ralph and Sophie Houston for your keen eye for detail and hugely generous donation of time and proofreading expertise, to Ewan for going way beyond duty as a beta-reader, and to all the other friends who helped in ways large and small, particularly with refining the cover.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Ru Pringle began his writing career at the age of 18, paying university bills by writing features for magazines. After a stint as an environmental scientist, he became a full-time writer, gradually veering towards travel journalism. He has also worked as a tree- and vineyard-planter, footpath builder, roofer, joiner, plumber, yacht crewperson, youth hostel warden, mountain and trail guide, oil-painting salesman, cook, sound engineer, and didgeridoo and mandolin tutor.
After several years as a touring musician, he now lives in the South West Highlands of Scotland.
Read more at Ru Pringle’s site.
CONTENTS
PROLOGUE
PART ONE / KAYAK
CHAPTER 1 / Selkie
CHAPTER 2 / Otter’s Pocket
CHAPTER 3 / Operations Centre
CHAPTER 4 / This Way to Hell
CHAPTER 5 / The Loch
CHAPTER 6 / Roadblock
CHAPTER 7 / Sleep on It
CHAPTER 8 / Meghan Trainor
CHAPTER 9 / From the Top
CHAPTER 10 / Barnhill
CHAPTER 11 / Camp
CHAPTER 12 / Whirlpool
CHAPTER 13 / Blunt Object
CHAPTER 14 / Scarba
CHAPTER 15 / Light Sleeper
CHAPTER 16 / Scent
CHAPTER 17 / Luing
CHAPTER 18 / Donkey
CHAPTER 19 / Craobh Haven
CHAPTER 20 / Skeleton Crew
CHAPTER 21 / Retaliation
CHAPTER 22 / Smoke and Mirrors
CHAPTER 23 / Squeeze
CHAPTER 24 / The Strait
CHAPTER 25 / Kerrera
CHAPTER 26 / Signs
CHAPTER 27 / Marina
CHAPTER 28 / Neon Town
PART TWO / YACHT
CHAPTER 29 / Mull
CHAPTER 30 / Dip
CHAPTER 31 / Damage
CHAPTER 32 / Iona
CHAPTER 33 / Sidelined
CHAPTER 34 / RPG
CHAPTER 35 / Hunt the Otter
CHAPTER 36 / Message
CHAPTER 37 / Secrets
CHAPTER 38 / Danish Pastry
CHAPTER 39 / Decision
CHAPTER 40 / Lucky
CHAPTER 41 / Surprise
CHAPTER 42 / Boat for Hire
CHAPTER 43 / Rùm
CHAPTER 44 / Orca
CHAPTER 45 / Visitors
CHAPTER 46 / Glass Tower
CHAPTER 47 / Proposal
CHAPTER 48 / Safe Haven
CHAPTER 49 / Forum News
CHAPTER 50 / Stormbound
CHAPTER 51 / Interrogation
CHAPTER 52 / Hope
CHAPTER 53 / Juggernaut
CHAPTER 54 / Ginger
CHAPTER 55 / Shipwreck
CHAPTER 56 / Feeding Pigeons
CHAPTER 57 / Foundered
CHAPTER 58 / Soay
CHAPTER 59 / Agenda
CHAPTER 60 / A Lack of the Health
CHAPTER 61 / Shangri-La
CHAPTER 62 / Fog
CHAPTER 63 / Juggled
CHAPTER 64 / Unimaginable
CHAPTER 65 / Stor
noway
CHAPTER 66 / Victory
CHAPTER 67 / Confession
CHAPTER 68 / Fade to Grey