by Stacy Borel
I wanted to turn around and lash out, then beg him to fuck me. He nearly had me in a puddle of mush on the floor. His hand was on the door leading outside when he called over his shoulder. “And feel free to share what I said to Luke,” Camden sneered with an emphasis on his name, then slammed the door behind him.
My body gave out, and I flopped down on the bottom step. I felt more exhausted now than I had when I got back from the gym. Camden was being such a hard ass, and he somehow seemed to take great pleasure in fighting with me. How was it possible that a man who showed his clear distaste for me was completely adverse to me exchanging numbers with someone? It shouldn’t even matter to him. And what was worse? None of that was what was truly bothering me at the moment. It was even more disturbing than his stupid rules. It was that with one look, one snap of his fingers, one menacing step in my direction, my body became needy for him. Camden made me feel desire unlike anything I’d ever experienced before. I was angry with myself for every single ounce of it. I’d come to realize that I wanted him to touch me, and I wanted more than just his eyes to penetrate me. It was unacceptable.
Sitting here in the quiet apartment, the only sounds were of the AC units outside humming. My long wavy blond hair was draped around me, covering me like a blanket. It felt cold and bereft without Camden’s presence. I gritted my teeth and tried to pull myself together. Standing up I marched up the steps and climbed into an icy shower. While the water beat down on my sore muscles, I decided that I was going to go back to the gym. I would face seeing Camden on a daily basis. I’d deal with the fact that I was physically attracted to him, but I would ignore it. I hoped that I would run into Luke, and we could work something out and possibly go do something. I hadn’t been on a date in a long time, and I was long overdue for one. My bossy roommate was going to have to deal with me and my non-compliance to his stupid rules. I smiled to myself, almost giddy at my determination of defiance. Take your rules and shove them up your perfectly carved ass, Camden. I had other things in mind.
Chapter Seven
THREE WEEKS HAVE PASSED since Camden’s threat. I have pretty much continued my daily routine. I went to school, work, came home, and went to the gym. Yes, the gym. Despite my concern of body parts falling off, I liked how I felt after a good workout. I saw Camden almost every time I went. The first few days I showed he had a smug little smirk across his face. I seriously wanted to beat his face in with a dumbbell. I refrained, because it didn’t seem very nice, and frankly I wasn’t sure if I could get blood out of my clothes. It aggravated me to no end. It was as if he got his way, and he somehow was the person to convince me to get in shape. There was a time after my second trip to The Dugout that I had thought about adding a laxative to his protein powder. It would have given me great satisfaction to see him running to the bathroom. He was lucky I wasn’t a vindictive person. Around my fourth time coming in, he stopped with his shit eating grin and went about his business like I was any other paying customer. I wasn’t sure how I felt about that. For starters, I wasn’t paying a thing to be a member there. It made me feel a twinge of guilt, because I was already paying so little for the apartment, and now I was taking advantage of his facilities. This was his livelihood. But then his words ‘the chubby one’ replayed through my head, and I shrugged it off. He owed me.
Sarah has been over at least a dozen times. She seemed to be adjusting well to the change, and she loved coming here. As long as she was happy, I was happy. There was one particular day when Dodger was around that he asked her if she had a boyfriend. She blushed and said, “Yes.” My eyes nearly bugged out of my head. But what entertained me was Dodger’s response. At some point since meeting her, he’d taken on a protector role with her. He gave her a level stare after grilling her about this boy’s name, age, how tall he was, if he had any prior felonies…? To which she replied in a very Sarah like fashion, “He’s eight. What’s he gonna get arrested for, stealing Spiderman underwear?” He explained that with boys you never know, and then he proceeded to tell her that she was not allowed to kiss anybody until she was married. Dodge said, “You’re the best kind of girl out there, Sarah. You make sure you find a boyfriend that cherishes every single one of your smiles and laughs, treats you like a princess, and gives you everything you could ever want.” Then he followed it up with, “Things like diamonds, a castle, and a Ferrari, so I can drive it and make sure it’s safe.” I laughed at him. Sarah smacked him on the arm and said kissing was gross then returned to playing with her dolls. Dodger was sweet to take her under his wing. She lacked a male role model in her life. He was good to her, and I approved of the time they spent together.
Luke and I have gone out a couple of times since he asked me for my number. I remembered walking through campus while eating some Whoppers when my cell phone rang, and I saw Luke’s name flashing on my screen. I inhaled my chocolate ball whole and started choking. Thank God for passersby who knew the Heimlich maneuver. What a sad, and yet wonderful, way to die…death by candy. Anyway, after my near death experience, I got the courage to call him back. He asked if I wanted to go grab a bite to eat and see a movie. I said yes, and now here we are.
He’s been very nice, and I was certainly attracted to him. Luke has this carefree look about him. He had longer blond hair that was tasseled like he’d just gotten out of the ocean and let it air dry. His arms were very tan, and I could only assume that the rest of him was just as dark. Luke’s body was long and lean. Not like Camden’s bulky muscled look, but one that showed clear lines and ridges of abs and arms without it being too much. My favorite part of Luke, though, was his smile. It was so easy and warm. His perfectly straight and white teeth stood out each time his face lit up at something I’d say. I found myself on numerous occasions leaning into him when he directed his grin at me. Yeah, I was definitely attracted.
My cell was vibrating and dancing across the table I’d set it on. I was at the library studying for my next A&P test. I’d managed to pull off a B on the last pop quiz, but again, it wasn’t enough. I had to push harder if I stood a chance at making it into the nursing program.
Picking up my cell, I propped it between my ear and shoulder while I shuffled some books around. “Hello?”
“Hey beautiful, what’re you doing?” Luke’s pleasant voice traveled through the phone.
I couldn’t help the smile that spread across my face. “I’m at the library studying. How about yourself?”
“I was just at the grocery store picking up some things for the house. Those guys eat at least twenty-five pounds of food a day.” I giggled. “If you think I’m joking, you should come watch them sometime. If there’s food in the house, they are all like a bunch of bloodhounds sniffing out their next meal. If I was like this at all when I hit puberty, I totally owe my mom for keeping me well-fed.” I could hear the lighthearted tone in his voice. Luke lived in the same frat house that Dodger had invited me to for the Halloween party.
“Sounds pretty typical. Aren’t y’all still growing boys?”
His voice deepened. “Depends on what you’re referring to that’s growing.” I bit my lip, and I could hear his throaty chuckle. “I swear I can practically hear you blushing through the phone.”
“Shut up,” was all I retorted with.
“Alright, alright, well I’m calling because I wanted to see if you would like to come out to the park with me. I could pack us a picnic and bring a Frisbee or a kite. What do ya say?”
He sounded so hopeful. It still amazed me that I was seeing someone like Luke. People like him never happened to people like me. I must have been quiet, because he said my name. “Oh sorry, I got distracted. Yes, I’d love to, that sounds fun. What time?”
“I’ll be there around six.”
“Sounds good, see ya then.”
We both hung up, and I gathered all of my things, looking at the time. Crap, I had two hours to get ready. I still needed to head home to take a shower and pick out what to wear. Slinging my bag over my shoulder I headed
to the elevators.
***
When I got to the apartment, Camden was sitting on the couch. I wasn’t expecting him to be home so soon. He was always at the gym, working until at least seven. It still made me slightly nervous to be alone with him in the same space. Shrugging it off, I came in, took my shoes off, and set my bag on the loveseat.
“Hey, you’re home early,” I stated simply.
He looked over at me from the television. He was watching some show about muscle cars, figures. “Yeah, I was teaching a class to the seniors when one of the granny’s started to go down. I thought she was having a heart attack but turned out she just can’t seem to lift the free weights and step up on the platforms.” He sighed. “I ended up pulling my quad trying to get to her before she hit the floor.”
I looked down, and that was when I noticed the ice pack resting on his leg. I instinctively went toward him to check on it but stopped short. He was eyeing me like he was wondering what I was doing. Instead I walked in front of the couch and around to the back. I was certain I looked like a crazy person walking random circles in the living room, but I couldn’t play off that I made a move in his direction.
“Just remember to keep the ice on for twenty and off for twenty.”
He glanced at me over his shoulder, a weird look marring his hard features. “I work in the fitness industry, I know how to take care of a pulled muscle.”
He didn’t mean what he said in a snooty tone, but I sighed. “Are you going to be okay?” I asked moving toward the stairs.
He’d turned away to look at the television. “It’s fine, I’m fine. I just need to ice it and work it out.”
“K,” was all I responded with.
I climbed the stairs and started rummaging through my messy closet. Deciding on a light blue maxi dress that I coupled with some flat sandals, I figured it would be the perfect outfit for the park. I didn’t want it to overdressed, but I didn’t want to seem like I didn’t care either. Hopping in the shower, I cleaned every crevice of my body, shaved my legs, and pumiced my feet. I tended to walk around barefoot a lot so the soles of my feet were on the rougher side. When I stepped out, I wrapped my body in a towel and darted across the hall to my room. I hadn’t realized, until I was putting on my makeup and doing my hair, that I was really excited to see Luke. He gave me butterflies. He was also the first person since my high school boyfriend who made me feel pretty.
I styled my hair half up and half down, so it cascaded down my back in long blond waves. The makeup I applied had a natural glow to it. My cheeks were a soft pink, a little mascara was applied on my lashes, and a very light rose-colored lip gloss finished my lips. Looking in the mirror even I had to admit to myself that I looked good. I looked…happy, excited, fresh. Luke was doing this to me. It was nice.
As I walked down the stairs, I breezed past Camden who was in the fridge looking for something to eat. I took a quick peek at him and noticed his nostrils flare slightly. Did he just smell the air?
“There’s some sweet potato soup in the Tupperware on the bottom shelf that I made the other day if you’d like it. It’s healthy so I figured you might want some,” I offered, as I sat down on one of the stool and adjusted my sandals.
Camden was looking at me in such an odd way, but he eventually turned back to the fridge and dug out the bowl. When he lifted the lid, he grunted in what I could only assume was approval. “This doesn’t look half bad. Thanks for offering.”
I snickered. “That’s because it’s not. I can cook, you know. Just because you like to control everything doesn’t mean that others are incapable of making healthy foods for your royal mouth to taste. And…you’re welcome.”
That honestly all came out harsher than I’d intended, but whatever. He regarded me for a few short moments before he continued moving about the kitchen and heating up the leftover soup. While his back was turned to me he said, “You uh, look nice. You goin’ out?”
I gaped at him. Like full on, fish out of water, mouth hanging open, gaped. Did Camden Brooks just compliment me? Now that was a strange concept. And it was one that made me flush from head to toe. I wasn’t even sure if I should acknowledge it, or if we were supposed to pretend that it never happened. I was also a little curious about the tiny butterflies I’d had in my stomach over thoughts of Luke, and how they had now sprouted hummingbird wings and were fluttering so fast that I felt the need to check my pulse. Pay attention Keegan. There was a question associated with his compliment. What was it again? When I brought my head up after fidgeting with the straps of my shoes, I was greeted by that deep chocolate brown color that was becoming all too familiar. His brow rose, reminding me that I still hadn’t answered him.
“Are you going out?” he repeated but in a slower way, annunciating every word.
Snap out of it woman! “Umm, yeah. Luke is coming by to pick me up.”
He was mulling over something. “You two seem to be seeing a lot of each other.”
It was a statement, not a question. I responded anyway. “Yes, we’ve been out a few times.”
The heat of his stare was making me uncomfortable and squirmy. “Hmph.”
What. On. Earth? Just drop it Keegan. Thankfully a knock sounded at the door and saved me from asking. I answered the door and was handed a beautiful bouquet of wild flowers. Luke was beaming. His dusty blue eyes went from my face, down my dress, and back up again. He smiled approvingly.
“You look stunning, as always.” Luke leaned in and kissed me on my cheek.
“Thank you so much. These are gorgeous. Why don’t you come in so I can put them in some water and then we can take off?” I stepped aside and let him in.
Luke stopped short just inside the door and was watching Camden inhale his soup.
“What is Brooks doing here?” Luke asked.
Hadn’t I told him that Camden and I lived together? I thought about it, but the more I jogged my memory, I’d come to realize I hadn’t said anything about it. Oops!
“He lives here. Camden is my roommate.” I pushed inside of the kitchen and started digging for a vase. The quicker I got the flowers in water, the quicker we could leave.
“Sup,” Camden said in greeting.
Luke gave a curt nod. “I didn’t know you two lived together.”
Camden’s cocky grin was plastered on his face. “Well, you do now.”
“Huh.” Luke’s voice sounded put off.
The two continued their staring contest, while I desperately searched for anything to use for the flowers. Why in the hell did it feel like a testosterone induced battlefield in my kitchen? And an even better question, why was I even bothering to look for a vase in a dude’s apartment? I couldn’t imagine that Camden kept them on hand for the many times he’d received flowers. Getting a tall glass out of the cupboard I filled it with water and started placing the flowers inside. I looked up at both boys when the room fell silent. Both were looking at each other as though they were sizing each other up. I briefly wondered if I should blurt out that they should just compare their penises so someone could come out a clear winner and I could pass out ribbons. I almost laughed at myself for even thinking it. As much as I didn’t understand this weird male ritual that I was witnessing, it still struck me as odd. Camden didn’t seem like the type to get intimidated, and yet there was something in his face that made it like Luke was competition. Competition for what, I wasn’t sure. We needed to get out of here, now.
Clearing my throat, Luke broke the eye contact and looked at me. “You ready to go?”
He nodded and moved the door. Both guys said their last names as a way to say bye, and we walked out the door.
***
When Luke and I got in the car, there was an awkward silence that had taken over. My hands were fidgeting in my lap, and I was trying not to lean forward to start fiddling with the dials of the radio or A/C. I’d been alone with Luke on more than one occasion and never was it tense when neither one of us were speaking, although the quiet moments w
ere far and few between. Right now I’d sell a kidney to hear what was going through his head.
“Sooo…” I said but wasn’t sure where I was going with it.
He looked at me out of the corner of his eye. “So?”
MmmK, this wasn’t going to go anywhere unless I just explained this to him. “Listen, I’m sorry I didn’t tell you about my living situation. It wasn’t intentional. Camden and I hardly even see each other, because he’s always at the gym, or I’m on campus studying. Most of the time it feels like I live there alone. I guess the subject never came up or occurred to me. But, I need to know, is this going to be a problem?”
He sat for a few short beats before he reached over and grabbed my hand. My fingers laced with his and I glanced down, noticing a crinkly spot on my dress. Oh man, apparently I’d stopped wringing my hands together and had taken up fisting my dress. Wonderful, it was all wrinkled now, so when I stood up, it would look like I’d had a death grip on my crotch. I sighed.
“It’s fine. I think it took me by surprise more than anything. I just assumed you lived with Macie. But that’s what I get for assuming, I should have asked.” He spoke quietly, and I could tell he was still deep in thought over it.
“Well, I should have said something. It’s really not a big deal. In fact, we shouldn’t have even run into him tonight, but he came home early because he pulled a muscle while teaching a class. I really don’t see him that much.” I gave a sheepish shrug.
He squeezed my hand. “It’s okay, Keegan, you don’t need to explain yourself. You live with him, and there’s nothing else going on besides being his roommate, right?”