by Kait Nolan
Contents
If I Didn't Care
Copyright
Dedication
Acknowledgments
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Chapter 19
Chapter 20
Chapter 21
Chapter 22
Epilogue
What's Next In Wishful
Other Books By Kait Nolan
If I Didn’t Care
A Wishing For A Hero Novel
By Kait Nolan
If I Didn’t Care
Written and published by Kait Nolan
Copyright 2016 Kait Nolan
All rights reserved, including the right to reproduce this book, or portions thereof, in any form.
AUTHOR’S NOTE: The following is a work of fiction. All people, places, and events are purely products of the author’s imagination. Any resemblance to actual people, places, or events is entirely coincidental.
License Notes
This ebook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. The ebook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each person you share it with. If you’re reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then you should purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.
Cover design by Kait Nolan
For everybody who ever fell in love with your best friend. This is a story of hope.
Acknowledgments
First and foremost, I have to my undying gratitude to my awesome editor, Susan Bischoff of The Forge Book Finishers. To Sidney Bristol, Lisa Kroger, and Kady Weatherford for your invaluable feedback. You made this a stronger book.
And to the members of the Squee Squad, who are the great champions of my work. I couldn’t do this without you!
Deniz Bevan, Gabryyl Pierce, Erica Turnipseed, Maria McConnaughy, Rose Kelley, Nancy Nicholson, Angela Zommers, Dawn Foss, Evelyn Nathalia, Naomi Nelson, Susan Bischoff, Barb Redner, Elizabeth Laurie, Cindy Thoennes, Caitlin Mannarino, Faith Wanjala, Annie Allen, Jay Perantoni, Barbara OBrien, Shelby Forbes, Karen Demeyere, Yasmeen Elfar, Alexis Roark, Lisa Orthmann, Vera B. Bolcevic, Carol McCarthy, Jacki N, Janice Richard, Vera Mallard, Leah Hughes, Sandra Mason, Margarita Gayle, Sheryl McNaught, Michael Lang, Irene Shea, Marjorie Mindel, Beth Colon, Pearl Moreno, Michelle Myre, Deborah Hawley, Melissa Riddle, Eunice Aleon, Mark Kyhl, Cathy Glenn, Christine Jordan, Lisa Benison, Connie Nowakowski, Andy Smith, Nicki Conroy, Mignone Chaves, Jessye Chevere, Beverly Pugh, Rebecca Donkin, Paige Ng, Deborah Bennett, Debra Punjabi, Kay Sterling, Theresa Morris, Amara Marcoccia, Elaine Boone, Suzy Perez, Lauren Dabney, Wendy Wright, Bernice Vigne, Meeta Mohabeer, Bert Blume, Andrea Partee, Tracey Landa, Trish C., Lesa Green, Ashley Nunn, Sharon Hughson, Angie McCaslan, Jackie Camire, Lorie Davis, Jo-ann Stenton, Heather Deal, Lynne DiTizio, Kathleen Kirkwood, Corlia Boshoff, Priya Prithviraj, Jami Plambeck, Bonnie Laurenzi, Wendy Jermier, Linda Dillbeck, Jennifer McMaster, Amy Drummond, Amanda Proch, Sinthia Hernandez, Heather Bahm, Fi Axford, Brandy Caywood, Carla Ellison, Reita Frazier, Sanet Steenkamp, Amy Webb, Alisa Price, Carey Colton, Carol Fraley, Cori Plastina, Tammy Jordan, Jen Apfel, Annett Krumske, Shayna Tyann, Carol Downer, Donna Rumfelt, Timothy Hendricks, Jessica Ramsay-Taylor, Susan Reis, Marietjie De Waal, Michele Perry, Pamela Mingus, Preot Oaks, Grace Adeleke, Josey Wales, Lacey Frink, Diane Klingman, T Clark, Jeri Denniston, Claire Spencer, Shayna Tyann, Susan Clement, FD Noz, Marci Higgins, Liz Smith, Wendy Edwards, Lisa Roth, Andrea Romero, Courtney Ludwig, Melissa Feriancek, Yolandi Henry, Georgina Akins, Mary Sundra, Myla Fujimoto, Lola Gillies, Loes Lotze, Brandy Nelson, Chelsea McNeil, Ava Grant, Patricia Parker, Jo Ladkin, Debbie Knieper, Wunmi Ayodele, Kady Weatherford, Melody Metz, Brianna Harvey-Khowley, Louisa Stewart, Lynn Henning, Georgine Kasprazak, Kathy Broggy, Roger Gisseman, Mary Miltier, Deena Knight, Nancy Kenney, Cynthia Duffee, Patricia Merritt, April Johnson, Gail Frankowiak, Sheila Waldner, Tammy Turnbow, Jean Pierson, Phyllis Souder, Paula Hurdle, Jen Roemershauser, Dawn Sablan, Carol Dominick, Becky Weldon, Theresa Denton, Holly Geer, Cindy Snider, Karissa C, Beth Blackmore, Sharon Shakinovsky, Deb Wagner, Tammie Neuenfeldt, Karen Beliveau, Jodi Lattanzio, Doris Chase, D C, Karan Jordan, Melanie Groff, Lynn Welborn, Eunice Elkins, Michelle Davyduke, Bev Harcourt, Sue Schultz, Loretta Cergol, Karen Call, John Alliapoulos, Lynn Cooke, Beverley Ettinger, Ronalee Coppock, Dawn Kuhn, Diane Harness, Glynneth Mathis, Priscilla Smith, Tracy Welsh, Ann Richardson, Judy Chamberlin, Karen Thompson, Ellen Ondo, Grace Ryan, Jodi Dawson, Dana Mullican, Susy Wolf, Shirley Pea, Joy Hack, Colleen Taylor, Margaret Ball, Yvonne Holste, Theresa Grant, Karen Nelson, Trudie Denton, Barbara Dombrowski, Cheryl Meyer, Charmaine Franklyn, Sharen Sherman, Kathryn Greiner, Rebecca Remley, Beverley MacMillan, Marilyn Burrows, Sue Everhart, Betty Caruthurs, Diane Gacki, Heiddi Zalamar, Richard Fetrow, Charlotte Holt, Kjristi Burningham, Noreen Chase, Karen Wilson, Deb Hazelton, Joyce Beard, Karen Baxter, Karen Cherry, Debra Turcotte, Alicia Muller, Barbara Rincon, Brbara Ultan, Alana Erstad, Jan Kingery, Janet Grindon, C Fannin, Larry Barlow, Rachel Burke, Marj Hodgins, Susan Byrd, Lori Tillman, Kim Bauer, Shaleen Varner, Beth Zone, Tondi Sorenson, Karen Kelder, Arielle Wood, Carol Sobeski, Kirstie Ibrahim, Joyce Insley, Michele Brooks, Jack Brumbarger, Martha Tippett, Kim Garman, Patty Garrett, Carol Kaczmarek, Anna P, Priscilla Patel, Betty Hopkins, Irene Griffin, Aimee Vanduyne, Gail Bell, April Angle, Annette Papageorgiou, Jeannine Muhn, Sue Mehr, Kristine Hoover, Debby Ong, Aren Ar, Anne Dallara, Lynette Elson, Katy Staley, Pam Walker, Sara Zuckerman, Cathy Wittie, Kim Jennings, Paula Pardue, Marian Andersen, Renae Bohnet, Kat Murray, Anne O’Brien, Suan Felts, Rita Aquino, Glenna Durst, Dorinda Perez, Sylvia Cole, Cathy Percae, Jackie Peters, Gisele Nicholas, RoxAnne Simon, Pam Skaggs, Joniara Orr, Martha Vega, Kimberley Goetz, Wenonah Schwedler, Samantha Roseberry, Karen Scheffler, Linda Trappe, Susan Gannon, Marlene Weber, Roberta Webb, Bernice Tresemer, Betty Martin, Narda Snell, Marilyn Ruediseuli, Elsie Thompson, Prathima Shetty, Penny Berry, Taylor Holden, Debbie Tolbert, Dorothy Scorr, Amanda Humphrey, Kimberley Capel, Kelli Prue, Kelly Jesso, Desiree Boettcher, Samie Hill, Dana Redding, Stephanie Smith, Eva Petelin, Jeslie John, Kerry Hackenberg, Cathy Long, Susan Kluchin, Susan Shrode, Cheryl Underwood-Eginton, Debbie Shepler, Marie Rogers, Jeannette Bruun, Anita James, Vicki Hammond, Marie Dehaas, Maria Drakopoulos, Stephanie Alexander, Debbie Keith, Donna Russell, Marilyn Hartz, Carol Pearson, Linda Denouden, Irene Heijser, Mabelisse Gonzalez, Alison Ritchhart, Gloria Kietzke, Anita van Vuuren, Cheryl Kendall, Edith Abraham, Kristen Lewendon, Pauline Garrity, Regina Cooley, Gwen Grant, Richard Smith, Deborah Poe, Lynn Palin, Karen Uhlik, Dawn Lowe, Katie Simmons, Nancy Miller, Shani Watkins, Marna Beineke, Deborah Renner, Natalie Cooper-Berthe, Whitney Hester, Misty Lewis, A Pastenes, Sue Greene, Selene Martinez, Carol Shreve, Leona Piane, Kristina Jalensky, Ann Levin, Elizabeth Weingart, Suzanne Zeller, Evonne Hutton, Caitlin Lijoi, Irene Bernstein, Cherie Dicken, John Rathborne, Patricia Ulam, Vera Norman, Gail Blau-Kalman, Alice McClellan, Rachelle Robbins, Lynn McWhirter, Andrea Paravano, Angie Rangel, Jessia Lyons, Randy Wilson, Ben Laurin, Jen Jorgensen, Olivia Davis, Ruby Watford, Betty Harrison, Angie Anderson, DeAnna Moore, Trudy Guiseppe, Julz Gudbrandsen, Kimberly Sjoberg, Debra Floyd, Judi Creedon, L Joner, Brenda Madsen, Laurie Anderson, Sharon Brown, Mary Lou Bachike, Tracy Carmody,
Kathy Graf, Autumn Mills, Merridy Buttice, Shawn MacKinnon, Nickole Wlasichuk, Renee Shirley, Anna Elsaesser, Carolyn Fitzgerald, Carole Snodgrass
Chapter 1
Dear God, if I’d wanted to break up elementary school fights, I would’ve become a teacher.
Headed into the second leg of a double shift, Officer Judd Hamilton tried his best to clamp down on the irritation. He had, after all, volunteered to organize FountainFest safety for the police department. And if that meant keeping Jim Vernon and Neil Faber from coming to blows over who got to kick off the 1-mile Fun Run, then that’s what he’d do.
Beyond the two geezers, he caught a glimpse of his girlfriend, Mary Alice, smiling at him. Her group of third graders were obviously excited about the race but behaved themselves. Unlike these two. He really wished he could put the pair of them in time out.
Instead, he tried his best to channel the calm, reasonable tone he’d heard Mary Alice use on her class. “Look, gentleman, I respect the fact that you were both told you could fire the starter pistol. I know it’s a big honor—” for the three seconds it will take for everyone to forget you were ever there, “and neither of you wants to be disappointed, but let’s have a little bit of perspective and festival goodwill, okay?”
“I’m not giving up my place!” insisted Jim.
“Why you old—”
Judd inserted himself bodily between them. “Y’all simmer down, or neither of you is doing anything.” His over-tired mind raced, looking for a solution that didn’t involve him plunking both of them in a cell for the duration of the festival. Somebody somewhere had to have some more blanks. “Look, if we can come up with a second starter pistol, you could both take the shot starting the race simultaneously. Equals. Is that acceptable?”
“I don’t know…” Jim waffled.
“Wouldn’t it look good to the townspeople to see the presidents of the Kiwanis and Rotary Clubs joint officiating?” Judd pushed.
“Well, I suppose that might be okay,” Neil allowed.
“As long as we both get to have our banners,” Jim insisted.
“One on each side of the starting line,” Judd promised.
“I can live with that,” said Neil.
“Good. Great. Y’all do that. Banners in place on those barricades, and y’all get in position. The race should be starting in fifteen minutes.”
Jesus. Was all this extra crap really worth enduring for the chance to be Chief of Police?
Of course it was. Because being Chief wasn’t the end goal. It was just a means to an end.
He waited until the combatants scurried off to their respective civic groups, then radioed to find some blanks. Couldn’t very well have civilians firing actual shots when town was crawling with pedestrians for the first annual Wishful FountainFest. Looking at the throngs of people, Judd couldn’t help but wish their city planner wasn’t quite so good at her job. The department didn’t have the manpower to adequately police this many people.
Should’ve called in some of the off-duty deputies from the county.
But the departmental budget couldn’t afford that either. Still, he’d seen at least two of the deputies in the crowd. Men he trusted, who could handle themselves. If anything went down, they’d lend a hand. Not that anything was likely to happen, but Judd had plenty of personal experience that made him less complacent than most.
As soon as the starter pistol situation was taken care of, Judd walked over to Mary Alice. Her sunny hair was pulled through the back of a FountainFest ball cap, and she was dressed to run in a t-shirt and shorts that showed off her toned legs. The sight gave him a bit of a jolt. He was so used to her conservative, elementary school attire, he often forgot what was underneath. Which was a terrifying sign of exactly how much he’d been working these last few months.
Need to rectify that.
“Kyle, pull your shorts up. Does anybody have to go to the bathroom before we get started?”
“Everything under control here?” Judd asked.
She looked up, blue eyes twinkling. “As in control as it ever is.”
“At least they’re better behaved than the race officials,” he observed.
“You get whatever that was sorted?” Her gaze slipped past his shoulder. “Danielle, stop picking your nose.”
“Barely. Race will be starting in just a bit.” A jaw-splitting yawn interrupted the statement.
She gave his arm a sympathetic squeeze. “Hang in there. Once this double is over, you’ll be off for four whole days.”
“Thank God.” The prospect of eight straight on a horizontal surface was more appealing than Venus herself.
With a quick glance at her charges, Mary Alice stepped into him, rising on her toes. Judd still had to lean down so she could whisper in his ear. “Maybe after you’ve slept, we could spend some quality time together. Do a little catching up.”
He hummed his approval at that idea, thinking about getting reacquainted with those legs of hers. A flash of red hair distracted him from the suggestion of what they could do with some of that quality time. Judd told himself the sudden jump in his heart rate was due entirely to the less than G-rated thoughts he’d just been entertaining about Mary Alice.
Autumn Buchanan, his oldest, dearest friend, cut through the crowd with Boudreaux, Judd’s massive bloodhound-mastiff mix, trotting beside her on a leash. She’d been dogsitting while he’d been on nights the last week. Livia Applewhite, one of her closest girlfriends, trailed in her wake. Judd straightened, eyes zeroing in on the number pinned to Autumn’s chest.
“Good morning, y’all,” Autumn called cheerily.
She and Livia both launched into greetings to the children they knew from the library, introducing them to Boudreaux. The dog sat, patiently enduring the kids’ adoration.
“Are y’all looking forward to the race?” Livia asked.
As she drew the children into excited conversation, Autumn stepped forward, extending the to-go cup in her hand. “I come on a mission of mercy. A Zombie Killer from The Grind. Extra shot of caramel, just how you like it. Figured you’d be dragging about now. Plus Boudreaux’s missing his daddy.”
Judd automatically took the cup in one hand, and gave his dog a head rub with the other, but he couldn’t tear his eyes off of Autumn. “Thanks. What are you wearing?”
She glanced down at her shorts and fitted tank top, which displayed miles of lean, toned legs and arms that he forced himself to ignore. “I realize you’re on a double, but if you’re so tired you don’t recognize running gear, I’m not sure you should be on duty.”
“I’m talking about the race number.”
She deliberately widened her green eyes at him. “It’s called participation.”
“You’re not running.” With a struggle, he managed to make it a question rather than an order.
“I am, actually. Livia, Riley, and I are doing it together.”
Frustration whipped through him. “You aren’t supposed to exert yourself. Dr. Webb said—”
“That exercise is good for my heart.”
“He meant yoga or swimming.” Hadn’t he? Nice non-competitive stuff that wouldn’t get her heart rate or blood pressure up. Nothing that might aggravate her heart condition.
“It’s a one mile fun run, not a triathalon. Besides, Boudreaux is looking forward to some exercise. Aren’t you, boy?” She scratched behind his ears, and Boudreaux pressed into her touch, eyes rolling back in bliss.
Missing his daddy, my ass.
“Boudreaux’s idea of exercise is walking from the sofa down to the end of my dock.”
“Which should be proof enough that I won’t be over exerting myself. Stop worrying, Grandpa.”
That was like ordering him not to breathe. He couldn’t just turn off twenty-five years of protective instincts. Not when he could still so clearly see her lying in that hospital bed, hooked up to half a dozen monitors and machines.
Someone’s voice boomed over a bullhorn. “Everybody participating in the F
un Run please take your position behind the starting line. The race will begin in five minutes.”
“We should go find Riley,” Livia said.
“Gotta go.” Autumn was already turning away before he could think of any other rational arguments against her running in this race. “Drink the coffee, Judd. You’ll feel better. Bye, Mary Alice!”
Beside him, Mary Alice lifted her hand in a wave. “She’ll be fine.”
Judd grunted a response and scanned the course to see what medical personnel were on duty in case something went wrong. The First Aid tent was about thirty yards away on one corner of the town green. They were more expecting scraped knees and sprains, but a defibrillator would be there. And he had his own EMT training to fall back on in an emergency.
None of it made him feel any better, but short of bodily stopping her from participating, it was the best he could do. Not that she’d had any incidents in years, and her last check-up with her cardiologist, three months before, had given her an all clear.
Judd blinked, realizing Mary Alice had been talking to him. “Sorry. What?”
A flicker of exasperation passed over her pretty face. “I asked if you’d be up in time tomorrow for us to go to your family’s Sunday brunch?”
“Yeah, sure. Mom’s been fussing she hasn’t seen me.” It’d be good to see his family. Plus he needed to firm up plans to go shopping with Autumn for his brothers’ birthday. No one was better at coming up with the best gag gifts for the twins than she was.
“No one outside the department has seen you since you went on nights a month ago.”
“Part of the job.” He shrugged. “Race is about to start. Y’all have fun and be careful.”
He bent to give her an absent kiss and hit her cheek when she turned at the last moment. Okay, so she was annoyed. He’d work on smoothing that over once this shift was done and he’d slept. He headed further up the street, judging the best spot to keep an eye out for Autumn. Just in case. The race course ran the length of the green, down Main Street, onto Franklin Street before looping back on Market Street to finish on the opposite side of the green. If she had issues, it would be on the tail end of the course. He positioned himself on the far corner of the green at Main and Spring Streets to watch the start.