Naked or Dead

by Murphy, A. E.

  “I caught three, but they’re big,” Nok explains and points to the bucket, his chest swelling with pride.

  Dasan peers inside and beams with pride at his son. It makes me ache for my own dad. He looked at me like that… sometimes.

  “Did you catch anything, young lady?” Peter asks me.

  I shake my head. “No. I’m sorry.”

  “Maybe next time.”

  I look at Nok who looks at me and crosses his eyes, making me giggle under my breath.

  “Perhaps you can bring her back on Wednesday and help her catch her own?”

  Nok pulls his lips in and clears his throat. “You’re inviting her to the thing?”

  “What thing?” I ask and Nok stares at his dad unblinking.

  “We’re having a cookout on Wednesday; you’re welcome to join us.” Peter grabs the bucket of fish and whistles with appreciation. “Nice size.”

  “Everybody brings a little something they caught,” Dasan explains. “Say you’ll join us?”

  I look at Nok for confirmation, but he won’t give me his eyes. “I don’t want to intrude.”

  Dasan snaps at Nok in another language and Nok turns his thin-lipped look to me and grits, “You wouldn’t be intruding.”

  “Convincing,” I comment and smile when Peter breaks out his deep laughter, making his wrinkled face crease further.

  But then he leans around the side, getting a better look at my face. “You are injured.”

  My fingers touch my temple where the swelling is. “I’m okay.”

  “What happened?”

  Dasan and Nok share a look but I can’t work it out.

  “I had a fight with the back of a truck and lost,” I say, it’s not the full truth but I’m not about to rat on Nok. He’ll get what’s coming to him eventually. Karma is a beautiful thing. Even when forced.

  “You are okay?”

  I nod and he seems appeased for the most part, though Nok can’t meet his eyes when he looks his way.

  “So we will see you there?” Dasan asks.

  Nodding, I tug on my lip with my teeth. “What if I don’t catch anything?”

  “You will. I have faith in my son’s teaching abilities.”

  “You overestimate my ability to learn,” I mumble and kick my boot into the dirt beneath our feet. A pebble rolls towards the powerful stream and stops just before the edge. Lucky pebble.

  Nok and his father exchange more words before they say their goodbyes.

  But then Dasan stops and looks at me, his body turned back towards the way he came. His eyes scan me up and down and a frown worries his brow.

  I wait for him to speak, I can see he wants to, but he doesn’t. He nods and goes on his way with Peter following closely behind.

  “If you don’t want me to go I won’t.”

  Nok clicks his tongue against his palate. “Too late now.”

  And he’s gone cold on me again.

  “What should I wear?”

  His cool demeanor flashes with a brief warmth, I guess he hasn’t totally frosted over. “The skirt you wore on Friday.”

  Rolling my eyes, I pick up the fishing rod and glance at the chairs. “We should get back.”

  “Scared I’ll seduce you?”

  At that I laugh loudly, I can see his ego is bruised but I don’t care. “There’s no way in hell I’m having sex with you, Nok. You made one thing clear back there with your family, I’m nothing more than a conquest to you.” I’m not insulted by it. Not much anyway. “I get it. You don’t like me. I slashed your tires. But I’ll warn you that I hate fake people. You’re either lying to me, or you’re lying to them, either way you’re lying. I’m done with you.”

  He laughs once. “You’re done with me?”

  “Yes.”

  “I just had my tongue down your throat.”

  I move towards the rocks that create a slippery path across the stream and inhale a calming breath. I’m not scared per se, but I’ve got consistent, mild vertigo which is making me woozy and off-balance.

  “And you think I don’t like you?”

  I shrug and step onto the first rock, breathing with relief and smiling at myself when both feet rest on its slippery surface without death. “I know how this goes. We sleep together and you ditch me and brag to all your friends about how you had me, and I was a shit lay. Leaving me the sad, pathetic new girl that you destroyed to fulfill your own psychotic agenda.”

  I step onto the next rock and wobble a little.

  “Do you really believe I would do something like that?”

  “I believe anybody to be capable of anything. Also, I trust nobody.” I leap over the final two and land wonky on the bank but straighten myself before I step in backwards and get swept away by the undercurrent. That would so happen to me. I just know it. “Because then nobody can hurt me.”

  “If you really think I’d do that, then what kind of person are you that you’d kiss me and let me touch you?”

  I grin at him and wag my brows. “A horny one.”

  “You’re so confusing.” He’s behind me now, his hands tucked into his jeans.

  “You’re only here with me because your family made you. You only took us to the movie because your brother made you. In fact, every interaction up until this point hasn’t been because you wanted to spend time with me at all. Admit it. Tell me what you really want because you’ve made it and said it plainly that you don’t like me.”

  “Doesn’t mean we can’t have amazing sex.”

  I laugh at his crassness. “I’m not having sex, not with you or anyone.”

  “We could try, I’m really fucking good.” He falls into step beside me and raises a challenging brow when I look at him. “Don’t believe me? Try me.”

  “I’m not having sex with you. Legit it’s not happening.”

  “Legit it’s not happening,” he copies, making his tone sound high-pitched and whiny. “Why don’t you admit it?”

  “Admit what?”

  “You won’t fuck me because you’re shit in bed.”

  I find his attempt at riling me up laughable. But this is what I want. What I need to see. He’s not a good person but I respect that he doesn’t pretend to be. Kind of like me. “Probably. I doubt being this tight could be pleasurable for anybody.”

  He groans, sounding pained. I smirk to myself.

  “You need to stop saying that.”

  “You’ve had a finger inside of me, you know it’s true.”

  He groans again and adjusts his pants. “What if I say please?”

  “Are you saying please?”

  “Not until I know it will get me the answer I want.”

  “It won’t. Sorry.”

  “Such a tease,” he murmurs and slings his arm around my shoulder. “What if I tell you the truth about what happened with Yasmine?”

  This time I raise a challenging brow and hold on to his wrist so we can more comfortably walk in step with each other.

  “Go on then. Tell me the truth.”

  He blows a raspberry and we walk in silence for a minute.

  “Whatever I tell you now, it’s her word V mine so what’s the point? You’re just going to think I’m telling you a tale to get laid.”

  I nod. “Probably. But I know and you know that you have no trouble getting laid. So why do you want to fuck me so bad?”

  “Because you’re hot,” he answers simply. “And really interesting, in a psychotic ‘don’t ever want her to be my baby mama’ kind of way.”

  “You just want to see if my psycho translates to my sex life.”

  “Does it?”

  I stop us both and turn into his chest, placing my hand on his twitching pec. “I can deep-throat.”

  “No fucking way.” He looks dazed, almost high, definitely excited. “Never had a girl who can deep-throat.”

  My hand wraps around his neck, under his silky hair. “I swallow too… while deep-throating.”

  He grabs my hips and pulls me into his body. �
�Prove it.”

  “Tell me the truth about Yasmine and I will. The truth. I’ll know if you’re lying.”

  He groans for an entirely different reason this time. “Seriously? What if you don’t like the truth?”

  “I’ll still suck your dick.”

  “You’re so fucking blunt.”

  I smile with pride. “I know.”

  “Fuck…” He releases me and grips my chin between his finger and thumb. “You’re driving me insane.”

  “Already there,” I quip and raise a hand.

  Humming out a growl, he presses his lips to mine and looks into my eyes for the longest moment. It sends happy little flutters from my lips to the ends of my nipples. Nobody kisses like him. It’s as consuming as I thought it would be.

  “I have never put my dick anywhere near that girl.”

  I wait for it, the tell that he’s lying, I’m not brilliant but I’m usually pretty fucking good at figuring people out. It doesn’t come. Is he telling the truth?

  He continues, looking bitter, and sneering in a way he never has, “She fucking hates me because I rejected her.”

  “So… how’d you end up leaving her at a gas station?”

  His hands rise, signaling his confusion and anger. “I offered her a ride home after she showed up at my house absolutely wasted. She was falling all over herself.”

  “Doesn’t surprise me.”

  “She tried her luck, I shot her down and she went fucking crazy. Scratched my face, punched me, started ripping at the interior of my car, pulled the wheel while I was driving. We almost crashed. I called her dad and he picked her up. But she was embarrassed. She told him I’d put my hands on her. She told everybody else I coerced her into handing over her virginity and dumped her because of my hatred for white bitches.” He laughs humorlessly and picks up a stone to throw it as far as the trees will allow. “I didn’t rape her or fuck her or any of that. I don’t fuck white chicks.”

  I blink once. That was a lie.

  “Well… you’re different.” He corrected himself before I could call him out. I like that.

  I roll my eyes at his line though. “Right. Different.”

  “Whatever. Just…” He laughs coldly under his breath and I can see now how much this has affected him. “What’s worse is it made girls just want me more. Want to tame me. I got more pussy offers after that than I did before.”

  “But?”

  “No buts. I just did. I suppose everybody hated me even more after that. I’d only been at the school a month and suddenly I was this villain that I never wanted to be.”

  I almost feel bad for him. Almost. Not quite. For all I know he could be spinning me a well-crafted lie. He’s had plenty of time to think this over. But then the earnestness beyond his harsh exterior is calling for my pity and my support.

  Ugh.

  “That’s the truth?”

  “Pretty much.” He smirks at me in challenge.

  “Well, a deal is a deal I guess.” I grab the button of his jeans and pop it open.

  “I want to tell you that you don’t have to, but I don’t have the strength.”

  I look around, ensuring the coast is clear, and back him into a tree like he likes to do to girls. I give him a chaste peck on his lips and drop to my knees before him, yanking down his zipper as I go.

  If that man is nearby, he’s about to get a show.

  He helps me adjust his jeans, helps me push them down just enough to free him from the confines.

  He’s hard already. Hard, thick, clean, cut, trimmed…

  This is a guy that knows how to take care of himself. He’s big, but I knew he would be. You can tell by a man’s arrogance what kind of cock he’s going to have.

  His is for lack of better wording, fucking gorgeous.

  It’s solid, straight, powerful, and his girth is impressive to say the least.

  I waste no time. I place him on my tongue and swallow him in one. It takes two tries, but I get there. This is not my first rodeo, not by far, but it is the best penis I’ve ever had in my mouth.

  I don’t do the teasing foreplay before; I’ve found men enjoy it more when you just put it in and fuck it all up in a good way.

  He moans so loudly it echoes in the forest around us. His hand goes to my hair and grips it in a tight fist. He appreciates it all. I take my cues from him. Swallowing around him, making my eyes water and my nose tingle but it’s worth it. I know exactly what I’m doing.

  My head bobs as my hands grip his hips that thrust against my face.

  “Lilith,” he bites out, sounding strained.

  I want to smile my satisfaction, but I cannot stretch my face anymore. It’s physically impossible.

  His groans get louder, his thrusts get rapid and uneven, his breathing is shallow, and his cock, it thickens even more. I’m wet, normally I don’t get affected by the pleasure of a guy, but Nok is something else.

  When I feel him tighten and sense the change that comes when one is about to climax, I release him from my mouth and push away from him, bating the bear.

  His eyes that popped open the second I pulled away are wild with lust and confusion and a dash of desperation. His body is shaking. I did that.

  All hail Satan and the bounties he gifted me.

  I bite my swollen lip and grin a smug grin to rival the one he’s so well known for.

  “Why have you stopped?”

  “I said I’d suck your dick; I didn’t say I’d make you come.”

  “No,” he insists, shaking his head slightly but quickly. “Don’t do this.”

  I tap him on the end of his nose. “I’m bored. And hungry. It’s past lunch.”

  “I have something you can eat.”

  I laugh and go on my merry fucking way, kind of remembering the way back to the car.

  Kind of.

  “This is so unfair.”

  “It is what it is.”

  He grabs the front of my T-shirt in a tight fist, making me tense with an unadulterated thrill. When he yanks me to him, I accept his kiss and bite hard onto his thick lower lip.

  He answers it by bending at the waist, hitching my leg up his thigh and grinding against me. His cock which is still hard though confined is pressing against my own heated sex.

  I gasp as I wasn’t expecting it.

  I hum because it feels amazing and I find myself rocking against him.

  He turns us until my back is against the tree I had him against moments ago.

  We really do a lot of stuff around trees.

  He buries his face in my neck and grinds against me, desperate for entry I can tell.

  He confirms this when he kisses me again and then down my neck, making me feel wild with arousal as his hand flicks open the button of my jeans and yanks the front of them down. My lips part, my head falls back. I want to curse, I want to give in. I’ve never wanted anyone this badly.

  “Stop,” I whisper, it’s weak, I’m not sure he heard me.

  He pushes a finger into my slick sex, rolling it over my clitoris and making me almost scream with the pleasure it inscribes onto my very soul.

  His large hands push down my pants, getting them halfway over my curved rear. The denim is tight and traps my legs together.

  For a moment I panic, feeling an urge to run wash over me more powerful than my lust for Nokosi.

  “Stop,” I demand, firmer this time.

  He stops his frantic undressing of me and instead cages me in, his chest heaving. “Please… don’t make me stop.”

  I tug up my jeans and fasten them before I can convince myself to keep going. I really want to keep going. “Use your hand later.”

  “No hand of mine can cure how I’m feeling right now.”

  I kind of like that. I want him to pine over me. I want him to feel desperate for me. I want to push him and watch him unravel with his need for me.

  I guide him backwards with my own hand to his chest and shrug my shoulders. “Sorry, bro. Maybe next time.”


  With blazing eyes, he storms away from me, acting every bit the petulant child that he is.

  I smile, knowing I have him right where I want him. I’ll always have him right where I want him.

  Hook, line, and sinker.

  I hadn’t planned on using Loki as bait for Nok but it is working out quite nicely. It’s Tuesday lunch break and Loki, bless his heart, insisted I sit with him. Now, I was going to say no because I’m still mad at Loki for talking about my business. But… he asked me before school, by my car, right after Nok pulled up in his truck.

  He didn’t just ask me; he also picked a bug off my collar and I saw Nok’s eyes find us and slowly change from normal to angry.

  Nok had stared, glared, foamed at the mouth. I swear I even heard him growl when I looped my arm through Loki’s and let him guide me inside.

  He’s possessive but in a really sexy way. Or maybe it’s just because I’m attracted to him, because in other men I’d find it irritating.

  Loki slides his tray closer to me. “Want anything?”

  I take a grape. They have those here.

  “How are you feeling?”

  “You asked me that this morning.”

  He smiles sheepishly. “Maybe you’ve changed your mind since then.”

  The look I level him with is flat.

  “Or not.”

  I look around the cafeteria, wondering why I even bother with this place. It’s boring and typical as fuck. I’m not learning anything worthwhile here. Not anything I need anyway. I’m just wasting precious time.

  Yet I can’t help but find this place intriguing and endearing. The way people are with each other. How they help each other. It’s not as stuck-up as I thought.

  Bullying here is at an all-time low from what I’ve seen. Girls who wouldn’t normally interact are hanging together in little bubbles. There’s no jock worship for the most part.

  I’m going to be sad to see it in life’s rearview mirror.

  All except one.

  One whom I’ve seen today laughing and joking amongst their peers. I hate them by default, but they deserve it.

  “I’ll be back,” I murmur to Loki who was talking about something I wasn’t listening to.

  He huffs, but he won’t take it personally. He wants in my pants too much.

  “Where are you going?” Nok asks me as I pass him and his group of friends. I know their names, but we’ve never spoken.