Longing For His kiss

by Sherri Hayes

  She turned toward the noise when she heard him get out of the car. The look on her face morphed from concern to joy as she realized it was him. He would never get tired of seeing that look. It had been appearing more often the last few days. Alexander hoped that meant she was getting used to the idea of them being a couple. Based on the conversation they’d had the night before, he was hopeful.

  “Have you been waiting long?” she asked as she came toward him.

  He grabbed his overnight bag and his cane and locked up his vehicle. “Not too long.” In truth, he’d been there since a little after seven. It didn’t matter. He pulled her against him and gave her a swift kiss before they went inside. “How was dinner?”

  “Nice.” She removed her coat and hung it in the closet before taking his and doing the same. “Did you know Beth grew up in Ohio?”

  “Can’t say that I did.”

  “She moved here to go to school—”

  He crushed her against him and cut off her words with a bruising kiss. When they came up for air a few minutes later, her breathing was labored and her lips were swollen. “As much as I want to hear all about your evening, there are more pressing matters I want to attend to first.” Alexander took her hand and placed it over his erection.

  She cupped him and rubbed her palm up and down, causing him to groan. It felt good, but it wasn’t exactly what he wanted.

  Before all thought went out the window, he removed her hand. The cooler air hitting his groin brought back a little sanity. “I want you in your room, kneeling on the floor, waiting for me when I come upstairs.”

  Her pupils dilated a little more. “Yes, Sir.”

  Alexander dropped his hands, releasing her. He waited at the base of the stairs while she ascended and turned the corner toward her bedroom.

  The time it took him to check the downstairs and make sure everything was locked up for the night gave him the opportunity to settle himself. After the day he’d had, what he needed more than anything was to let it all go and sink into the dynamic he and Grace had. The thought of seeing her gazing up at him with those expressive eyes of hers while she waited for his command had him hurrying up the stairs as fast as his bum leg would take him.

  When he walked into her bedroom, he found Grace exactly as he’d requested. She was naked, kneeling by the end of her bed, her knees spread wide. Her breathing told him she was as excited as he was for what was to come. She was such a beautiful submissive, and she was his. The internal voice inside his head telling him he should feel guilty for the thoughts running through his head was almost nonexistent. He wanted Grace and she wanted him. They weren’t betraying anyone.

  He closed the distance between them, using his cane to steady himself. It had been a long day. She kept her gaze on the ground as he approached, but that wasn’t what he wanted. He wanted to see her eyes, to see the emotion in them staring back at him.

  Reaching out with his left hand, he threaded his fingers through her hair, letting the silky strands run through his fingers. Even such a simple gesture brought him some much needed peace. He heard her sigh and knew she felt it, too.

  Alexander gathered her hair together and tilted her head back so she was looking up at him. There was complete trust in her eyes, and he decided to take a chance. He lifted his other hand, his cane dangling from his fingers, and rubbed his thumb and index finger along the line of her jaw. “I missed you today. I had a horribly long meeting and all I could think about was how much I would rather be here with you.” He paused. “Or anywhere with you.”

  There was a slight shift in her eyes and he could tell she wanted to avert her gaze, but she didn’t—her years of training evident. He waited for several minutes to see if she would bolt or use her safeword, but she didn’t.

  When he was satisfied she wasn’t going to abruptly end their scene, he continued. “We’re going to enjoy some impact play tonight. I want you to lie on the bed facedown, legs spread. I’m going to have some fun.”

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  Chapter 23

  Grace could feel the warmth from her shoulders to her knees. Alexander had worked her over good with several different floggers. She’d forgotten how good it felt to drift into subspace as the flogger kissed her skin.

  A contented sigh left her lips as she snuggled closer to Alexander. He tightened his hold, giving her breast he held in his palm a little squeeze. “All right?”

  “Hmm. More than all right. I think I’m still in subspace.”

  His chest vibrated beneath her cheek. “You did seem to enjoy your flogging quite a bit.”

  “Yes, I did.” She placed a kiss on his chest and skimmed her hand down the length of his torso. “Are you feeling better?”

  It hadn’t taken her long to realize he’d had a bad day and had needed to work through some of his frustrations. He hadn’t been rough with her, not really. But as the scene went on, she felt his mood shift as he let go of whatever it was that had been bothering him. She’d been pleased she was able to help.

  “Much better. Thank you, gattina.” His lips brushed against the top of her head.

  They fell into a contented silence as they lay there touching. Everything felt right. Peaceful. She thought about what her sister and Beth had said. She knew they were right. It was time she fully embraced whatever this was between her and Alexander and stopped living in the past.

  Making that decision took a huge weight off her shoulders. “Are you staying?”

  She felt his lips turn up into a grin. “Unless you’re kicking me out.”

  “Nope. No kicking.”

  He continued to play with her breast as they talked, and her lady parts were starting to wake up again even though he’d already given her three orgasms tonight. She knew she needed a distraction. “Can I ask you a question?”

  “Anything.”

  “What does gattina mean? I’m assuming it’s Italian?” She absentmindedly traced a circle around his nipple, memorizing the dips and bumps.

  “It is.” He lowered his hands to her waist and shifted her so she was lying on top of him. “It means kitten.”

  She could feel his erection growing against her belly and wondered if her playing with his nipple had a similar effect on Alexander as his massaging her breast had on her. Still, she tried to focus on the conversation at hand. “Do you call all your submissives kitten?”

  An amused smirk appeared on his face. “No.”

  So it was only her. For some reason she liked that he’d reserved that name for her alone.

  Alexander cupped the side of her face with one hand and reached between them with the other, finding her clit. He circled it slowly as he held her gaze and whispered, “My sweet gattina.”

  She heard his words, but more than that she felt the emotion behind them.

  He increased the pressure on her clit, driving her higher, yet he made no move to change their position or reach for a condom. Instead, he cradled her face in one hand with the gentlest pressure while he drove her toward another orgasm.

  Her body was still buzzing from earlier, so it didn’t take long before she was teetering on the edge. “Sir?”

  “Yes, gattina?”

  “Sir, I’m so close. May I come? Please?”

  He pulled her face down to his. “Let go. Come for me.”

  His words were barely audible, but she’d heard them. More importantly, her body heard them and responded. He caught her gasp with his lips, plunging his tongue inside her mouth to devour every moan she had to give while she rode out her fourth orgasm of the night.

  As she was coming back down to earth, she heard him rip open a condom. Moments later, he lifted her hips and placed his cock at her entrance. There was no talking, no sounds other than their kisses as he lowered her down onto his erection.

  He held onto her hips, guiding her movements. Time slowed and all her nerve endings felt as if they were right below the surface of her skin. She could feel the air around them brushin
g against her flesh. It was so much cooler than the heat, the fire, she felt inside.

  She had no idea how long they rocked back and forth, grinding against one another. He kept her on the brink without allowing her to fall over the cliff for what felt like forever, but she didn’t mind. He seemed to need this as much as he’d needed to flog her earlier. And to be honest, she needed it as well. Things were shifting between them. It had been happening for a while, since the beginning really, but she’d been resisting it. But this. Here. Now. There was no way to pretend. Somehow, Alexander had pushed past all her walls.

  Eventually, he flipped them over so he was pressing her into the mattress, but he refused to pick up the pace. He hiked her leg up over his hip, changing the angle. The new position had her digging her nails into his shoulders. She wasn’t going to be able to hold on much longer.

  He must have been able to read her mind because he reached between them and pinched her nipple. Hard. “Don’t you dare come. Not yet.”

  A whimper escaped her. Grace gritted her teeth, hoping she could stave off her orgasm. She didn’t want to disappoint him.

  The exquisite torture went on until she saw sweat beading on Alexander’s temples. It was obvious he was trying to hold his own climax at bay. “Sir, are you okay?”

  He met her gaze, took hold of the side of her head, and kissed her. “I’m fine. Just enjoying fucking my submissive. I can’t seem to get enough of her no matter how many times I’m inside her. Or for how long.”

  Her pussy liked that and responded by tightening around him, trying its best to hold him deep.

  Alexander propped himself up on one elbow, but didn’t stop the gentle torture as he continued to move his hips in and out. He ran his index finger along the curve of her neck and her mind immediately went to what was missing. His gaze locked with hers. “I want you to wear my collar. The next time we go to Serpent’s Kiss, I want my collar around your neck, letting everyone there know you’re mine.”

  She swallowed, a flood of emotions surging through her body. He watched her face and waited for her answer. The answer was easy. Despite her back and forth, her uncertainty that whether or not what she felt for him was right, this thing between them was real. She felt it every time he touched her—every time she thought about him. “I would be honored to wear your collar, Sir.”

  He took hold of the side of her face, tilted her head back, and kissed her hard. “I will make sure you don’t regret it, gattina. I promise.”

  Alexander didn’t give her a chance to answer as he continued to kiss her with abandon. As his tongue danced in her mouth, his hips increased their rhythm. She held on, lifting her hips to meet each of his thrusts.

  Snaking his hand down over her breast and along her side, he splayed his hand on her hip. He eased his thumb between them, placing it over her clit. The sensation was too much to bear. Her head fell back and her muscles contracted around him in a vise grip. She was panting, desperate to come. Her heart felt as if it would beat out of her chest.

  “Do you wish to come, gattina?”

  She could barely get the words out. “Yes, Sir.”

  “I do like seeing you like this, so close and trying not to come without permission.”

  He brushed his thumb over her clit again and she jerked. Not because she didn’t want him to touch her, but because he was right. She was about ready to blow whether she wanted to or not.

  Alexander scraped his teeth against her neck as he placed gentle pressure against her clit once more. “Come for me.”

  As he offered his permission, he bit down on her neck, sucking the skin into his mouth. At the same time, he picked up his assault on her clit and began pistoning in and out of her deeper, harder. It was too much. She screamed as her climax hit her like a freight train.

  Seconds later, while she was still riding out her own orgasm, she heard Alexander grunt as he reached his own climax. His entire body shook as he emptied himself inside her, letting her know that his reaction to their extended joining had been as powerful for him as it had been for her.

  He peeked up at her through his lashes, a satisfied smile on his face. “We will definitely be doing that again.”

  Maybe it was the look on his face or maybe it was the fact that her emotions were still so close to the surface after what they’d done, but she started laughing. A concerned look crossed his face for a moment before he decided to join her.

  ***

  Alexander woke up drenched in sweat. After he’d regained consciousness in the hospital, he’d suffered from frequent nightmares. They were vivid and terrifying. It was always the same. He was trapped, his leg pinned down, preventing him from moving more than a few inches, while he watched his buddies get picked off one by one. He could see all their faces—the look in their eyes the moment they realized their fate—and there was nothing he could do to stop it.

  As his body recovered, he’d also worked on healing his mind as well. He’d talked to one of the VA shrinks a few times and wrote down everything he could remember in a journal. It had been one of the most difficult things he’d ever done in his life, but he knew that if he didn’t face it head on that it would slowly destroy him. But dealing with the realities of PTSD was a lot different than reading about it in a medical journal.

  He took several deep breaths, trying to calm his heart. It had been months since he’d had one this bad. And usually he could take a few moments to center himself and he’d be okay. For some reason, that wasn’t happening this time.

  Careful not to wake Grace, he climbed out of bed and made his way into the bathroom. He felt hot and cold at the same time. It was unsettling, but rationally he knew it was most likely the difference in his internal temperature and the cooler air hitting his sweat-covered body.

  The logical part of his brain forced him to turn on the shower and get under the spray. As the warm water fell against his skin and the steam filled his lungs, he began to breathe a bit easier. He reached for the soap and began working the latter between his hands, taking his time washing his body.

  By the time he turned off the water and reached for one of Grace’s towels, he was feeling somewhat normal again. Or as normal as he ever felt these days.

  Alexander threw his wet towel into the hamper and turned off the light before heading back into the bedroom where Grace was still sleeping. She was lying on her side, her arms tucked up under her chin. A light from outside streamed in through the windows, landing on her hair. It almost looked as if it had flecks of gold in it the way the light was hitting it.

  His chest clenched with a surge of emotion. It was so powerful it nearly sucked the air out of his lungs. It was a combination of overwhelming love mixed with the weight of responsibility he felt to do right by her.

  A sigh escaped her lips as she rolled over. The movement caused the sheet to pull away from her chest, leaving most of her upper body exposed. Although his libido wouldn’t balk at going another round, he knew she needed her sleep. They both did.

  With that in mind, he slipped back into bed as gently as he could. Alexander closed his eyes and tried to relax back into sleep. He listened to Grace breathing beside him, the soft inhale and exhale relaxing him.

  The feel of her fingers against his arm made him open his eyes. He looked over at her, but her eyes were still closed. She sucked in a breath and scooted a couple of inches closer to him. “You okay?” Her words were mumbled, barely audible.

  He gathered her in his arms and turned them so her back was against his chest. “I’m fine. Go back to sleep.”

  A sleepy grin appeared on her face. “Yes, Sir.”

  Alexander smiled and placed a kiss on the back of her head before closing his eyes again.

  It took a while, but he did eventually fall asleep again. Holding Grace had helped ward off the nightmares.

  Her alarm went off at five thirty. Neither one of them seemed all that anxious to get up, but they both had work. He pulled her to him and gave her a lingering kiss. “Why don�
�t you grab a shower while I go downstairs and make the coffee?”

  She stretched. “Okay.”

  He waited until she was out of sight before he got out of bed. Last night his adrenaline had been pumping, so he hadn’t paid much attention to his leg. This morning he was paying for the neglect. It took him several minutes until he felt comfortable putting his full weight on it.

  The sound of the shower turning on told Alexander he needed to get a move on. He’d brought his cane upstairs the night before and he reached for it without hesitation. Last night was amazing, but it had taken a toll on his body.

  Alexander was pouring their coffee into mugs when Grace strolled into the kitchen. He handed her one before taking a seat at the kitchen table.

  “Thanks.” She took a sip and set the mug down on the table. “We had some muffins left over yesterday.”

  “Sounds good.” He wasn’t picky. At this point he probably would have eaten just about anything she put in front of him. They’d both burned off a lot of calories last night.

  Grace brought a plate of five muffins to the table. “There’s cranberry, banana nut, and one blueberry, I think.”

  They spent the next several minutes devouring the muffins. To be honest, he probably could have eaten all five himself.

  As they were cleaning up, Alexander felt he needed to broach the subject of her collar again. Although he was fairly sure she did want to wear his collar, it was always better to address these things when hormones were not in play. This was a serious commitment for both of them.

  He wrapped one arm around her waist and tugged her flush against him. Grace came willingly, circling her arms around his neck. She looked almost angelic as she smiled up at him.

  “I thought we could go shopping tonight.”

  The look on her face told him she hadn’t been expecting that.

  Alexander pressed on. “I know some Doms like more traditional collars for their submissives, but I want something you can wear everyday as well.”

  He felt her muscles tense, but she didn’t comment.