Dr Sawyer

by Brittany Dreams

  Pointing his finger at him, he made a huffing noise and bared his teeth.

  “If I were ten years younger I’d have you on the floor with your nose down your throat. How dare you fuckin smart mouth me. I said I quit, now stop getting on my damn nerves.”

  He hissed and lay back against the pillows.

  Devon just grimaced and looked over at me, crooking his finger for me to go outside with him.

  I followed.

  We stopped just outside the room by the wall unit where we kept the charts and notes.

  The other day when he did that we were in the mentor meeting with the others, and all the while Dr. Morgan thought we were talking about our patients care we were actually seeing how best we could keep our faces straight while we talked dirty to each other.

  “You better not say anything sexual to me,” I warned before Devon could even open his mouth. I kept my voice lower than I would if we were whispering because there were people passing by.

  Devon gave me a devilish look with mischief in abundance in his eyes. “Don’t tempt me.”

  “I’m not trying to.”

  The seriousness returned to his face and I knew he’d switched to business mode. I wasn’t used to working with him like this. Where we had to be professionals and real grown up doctors. It had been four weeks since we’d taken this plunge to see what would happen to us and I had to admit I was liking it.

  I was being careful and he was being careful with me.

  Sometimes too careful when it came to work. As in, he was protective of my emotions when it came to our patients.

  “I’m a little worried about him,” Devon remarked and glanced over at Coach Fratelli.

  “I know.” I nodded. “Me too.”

  He knew we were seeing each other and would normally be straining his neck to hear what we were saying if we were in the room. Or if we were like this I swore he’d be trying to read our lips. Then when we returned to him he’d always make some remark.

  He’d been looking at us as we went outside the room, but now he was looking over at the long floor-to-ceiling glass window in the corner.

  “His blood pressure is worrying me. No one can work out why it keeps rising then falling the way it does. The meds aren’t stabilizing him. It’s been long enough. I’m going to refer him for some tests.”

  Now I was more worried. “What kind of tests?”

  “Just something more in depth, and an MRI.”

  I narrowed my eyes at him. He wouldn’t have wanted to send Coach Fratelli for an MRI for something routine.

  “Why an MRI? You suspect something. I can see it.”

  He smiled and brushed over my nose lightly with his thumb. “Or I worry too much.” He gave me a wolfish grin. “And since I’m not the kind of guy who wants his girl worried over nothing, I’m not gonna tell you.”

  “You do realize that your girl is more worried now upon hearing that.”

  “I do, but I’m still not saying anything until I have to. I like my girl mellowed out. There’s enough for us to keep our heads occupied with. No need to add more stuff.”

  Was it wrong that I was enjoying being called his girl far too much?

  At least I was at this point, and it felt like a good place to be.

  “Devon, do you think that maybe he’s just upset about his son?”

  Last week Coach Fratelli got the news that his son’s return to the States would be delayed by another six months. He’d have to stay in Japan on a new project. I knew and had seen many instances where patients took a nose dive after hearing something they didn’t want to hear. Particularly if it was something they were working toward. Like he was.

  “I don’t think the news helped, but I noticed it awhile back. It’s been going on for a while. Kelly, you know things like blood pressure and blood work are usually the first indicators of something else going on. I noticed today he has a high fever too.”

  My shoulders slumped. “What do you think it means?”

  He tapped the side of his head and smiled. “I’ve said too much, but I just want to make sure you’re on guard to keep watch.”

  I nodded, respecting his answer. I understood. I might be the same too, except I wasn’t. I liked to hash things out and brainstorm a problem until I came up with a solution of what to do.

  “I’m going to sit with him for a little while then go.” I was having dinner with Dad later.

  “What time am I seeing you tonight?”

  “I’ll be with you by nine thirty,” I promised.

  He turned his smile up a notch and leaned forward. “Make sure you wear that black lace thong. Nothing more,” he whispered.

  I bit the inside of my lip and hoped like hell I wasn’t blushing too much.

  “Okay.”

  He chuckled deep and low and backed away from me with a wink.

  I watched him go and went back inside the room.

  Coach Fratelli turned his head and looked at me as I approached.

  His expression always softened when he was talking to me or dealing with me in any way.

  He gave me a little smile and straightened up.

  “Something’s wrong with me,” he declared.

  “Isn’t that why you’re here?” I probably wouldn’t have said such a thing to any other patient. In the seven weeks that we’d gotten to know each other some of the barriers that would normally be in place sort of dissolved.

  He chuckled and started to cough.

  The coughing fit subsided after he took a sip of water and cleared his throat.

  “Something more is wrong with me. I’m so messed up I know when I have a new addition to the list of things that’s wrong. And the irritating thing is your Fonzie boyfriend knows more than he’s saying and sensed it from awhile back.”

  “My Fonzie boyfriend as in Happy Days?”

  “Fonzie. You see that leather jacket he wears.”

  Devon had a leather biker jacket and he looked so sexy and cool in it. Definitely not a Fonzie, but hey I’d humor him. I actually had no qualms about Fonzie.

  Also, I was kind of distracting Coach Fratelli from the real question or worry we both had.

  It was always the worst when my patients knew something more was wrong even before I did. it was often that thing that caused them to go and see a doctor in the first place.

  As a doctor the only thing I could do right now was listen to him.

  After the tests we’d know more and I prayed there was nothing to worry about because this guy had grown on me.

  “What do you think is wrong?” I asked.

  He shook his head at me. “I feel it in my soul. Like something dimmed. Something faded. Like the life is leaving me somehow. More than usual. The pain…when it hits it’s greater than it used to be. The headaches feel different too. They start and end in different places. Feels like something more has changed in just the last few days. Normally the bad feelings would pass after I get my meds; now it seems to trigger this weakness inside me that I can’t bear. Like a hollow.”

  Although he was being quite descriptive, what he was describing could have been anything. It was emotional. I understood it but couldn’t quite give an answer.

  “Try not to worry. We’re continuing with the treatment plan and if there’s more to do we’ll do it. Try not to worry about anything.” I was also referring to his worry over his son, and he knew what I meant.

  “All this”—he waved his hand over himself—“it’s bullshit isn’t it?”

  “What? What do you think is bullshit?”

  “The treatment. It’s not gonna work on me. Not one bit. I can’t walk. Haven’t walked in a long time yet I want to keep my legs so I don’t look bad when I turn up to the ice rink in a wheelchair with my grandson. Like that’s such a bad thing. I’ve been in a wheelchair now for years. I’ve been to the rink in it many times. It’s just…me thinking of the good old days when I had full use of my legs. I was an athl
ete. I worked hard to be who I used to be, and to become a coach.”

  “Coach, I can’t tell you whether this will work or not. You’re responding well to it and that’s good. If you’re asking me if it will make you walk again, I’m gonna be real with you and say no, but what we’re doing is helping to prolong your life and the life of your limbs—your legs.”

  He nodded. “I get it. I do. I foolishly had this wild vision of me getting full use of my legs back. I’d read the part about people responding differently and I hoped that maybe my ‘different’ could be that.”

  I gave him a little smile. “I hear you. I would have loved that for you too.”

  “You should have seen me way back when, when I used to play pro hockey. I was amazing. Championship winner. Nobody was faster than me. I always knew I wanted to be a coach. Always knew that was the natural order of things. It was a given. Then I met my wife and she was the kind of woman to help you accomplish dreams.”

  He’d never mentioned his wife before.

  “I can read your mind, Doctor.” He chuckled.

  “What am I thinking?”

  “You’ve never heard me mention her before. And you’ve never seen her. It’s a given that you’d be curious as to where she is. We’re separated. Not together anymore. I haven’t seen her in years, but guess what? If she knew I was like this she’d be here in a heartbeat.”

  That was weird. Nice but strange. If he had someone like that why would they be separated and why wouldn’t he want her here?

  In this whole time the only person who’d come by was Bernardo, his best friend who he’d introduced as his friend from when they were boys. Nobody else came.

  “Don’t you want her here?” I had to ask. He’d thrown me a bone and I was catching it.

  When he shook his head a flicker of pain darkened his eyes. “No. I do not. I don’t know why I even mentioned her. Maybe everything I’ve done feels like a waste, and everything I’m doing now. The money I spent here could have been used for something else. Someone else.”

  “I think you should call her. You need all the support you can get and if she is how you describe her to be, she’ll get here as quickly as she can.”

  He rested his head back against the pillow and turned his face away from me, signaling the end of our conversation.

  ***

  I was thinking about him a lot after I left.

  It was the first time Coach Fratelli had acted so vague. It was in my nature to be inquisitive so I always had to be aware of when I might be prodding too much. When I never got an answer to a question, or satisfied my curiosity, it left me like this.

  Dad noticed it straight away when I sat down to join him for dinner at our favorite restaurant. The place was originally called Montebello. It was an Italian restaurant that had changed hands twice. Now it was called Cicero.

  Different owners to the original we’d first loved but they were just as good.

  Dad first took me here when he made his first million.

  He’d kept his project under wraps and never let on that he’d been working on something top secret that was about to change our lives. I was fourteen at the time and we’d really had it rough after Mom left.

  We even lived in a trailer park for a few months because Dad had to leave his job to take care of me. It all worked out in the end when he started a company with a friend.

  Neither knew they were about to become millionaires. With how much Dad made, I wasn’t even sure if millionaire was the right term. No one would think it from looking at him either because except for his cars, he carried himself in such a humble way.

  That first day when Dad brought me here I’d thought we were going to Macdonald’s. That was our usual treat.

  He’d told me then that he wanted to take me somewhere nice to celebrate then he hit me with the news that would change my life. It did change my life, and definitely our relatives too because Dad was the kind of man to share his wealth and make sure his family all benefited from it. My grandparents, aunts, and uncles.

  Ever since that day we came here every month.

  “You look like a million dollars.” Dad beamed, giving me a proud smile.

  I laughed. “Dad, I wish I looked like that.”

  I was wearing a dress he’d bought me. He bought me a dress every month too and treated me like I was a doll.

  “You do. Now what’s with the mood? Your aura is speckled with rainbow-colored energy,” he boomed in a chirpy voice.

  Coach Fratelli might have had me curious but so had my father for the last few weeks.

  “Rainbow-colored energy? Sounds like you’ve been eating too much sugar again.”

  “I have not Miss Lady. You do know you’re one to speak telling me that right? Pot calling the kettle black.” He chuckled and I laughed.

  Nobody loved sugar more than me so he was completely right.

  “I know.” I held up my hands and nodded in surrender.

  The waiter came up and took our drinks order. I just wanted a virgin cocktail tonight. It was best because I wanted to be fully alert later with Devon. Not to mention, me and alcohol plus him equaled lateness for work.

  That sort of thing wouldn’t fly this year. We might be able to be late a little but not the way we used to be in our intern year.

  “So, what’s up?”

  “A patient. There’s always one that gets me worked up. But I think it’s because I’ve been doing a lot of thinking lately about a lot of stuff.” It didn’t escape me that I may have been inclined to take note of things that were relationship related because of my own situation.

  “Does the stuff include a certain young man I’m yet to get reacquainted with?” Dad asked with a stern expression. His bright blue eyes that mirrored my own gave me a pointed stare.

  Dad hadn’t seen Devon since we’d gotten back together. I remembered years back when it got to the stage where I knew I was going to have to introduce the two. It was heading that way again fast.

  “I’m hoping you’ll get to meet up soon.”

  He smiled. “Well nice to hear dear. It is. I’m…proud of you for taking such a big step and giving him a chance. Giving you both a chance. It’s all we can do in the end.” His eyes twinkled.

  I held his gaze and appreciated his words. It must have been a big thing to say to me considering all he’d been through.

  “Thank you Dad. I just hope I’m doing the right thing.”

  He reached across the table and took both my hands into his.

  “I’m trying. This part is the trying phase. The best part of trying is seeing what happens. I’ve been guilty of not doing any of that over the years and I worry that I might have been a bad example to you.” He released my hands.

  I narrowed my gaze and shook my head. “Dad, no. Please don’t think that.”

  “It’s true. I know I have. There was no question of it. I hope to change that anyway.” He looked nervous and caution spread across his face when I smiled.

  Once again I found myself wishing he was going to share some news of seeing someone. The last time I hoped it and felt he might have but he’d told me he bought a new car. Not the same thing.

  This time he seemed different.

  “What’s going on Dad?”

  “I met someone…I think you’ll like her.”

  I had to fight the urge to jump up and rejoice.

  “Oh my God. Seriously?” I gasped.

  He nodded. “Yeah. Her name is Gina. She’s a few years younger than me. Five years actually, but I think I really like her.”

  “Dad, oh please. You’re fifty-six, a woman who’s fifty-one is hardly that much different in age.” Never mind the men who were his age and dating women who were half their age. I think I would have definitely had to say something about that. She’d be the same age as me if that was the case.

  “I know. It’s just weird. Not because of that. It’s part of it though. Your…mother and I had th
e same difference in age and I kind of got used to that. It’s irrelevant now. I guess I just hung on and shut down on that front. Tried to focus on my little baby doll.”

  I rolled my eyes at him. “Dad, you’re gonna have to stop calling me that one day.”

  “Humor a tired father who’s proud of his daughter. You did good kid. Look at you. My little doll grew up to be a surgeon. I’m really proud of you. I’d…like you to meet her.”

  “I really want to. I’m excited!”

  “Thanks for making it easy to talk to you about something like this. It could be serious. I hope it will be. I’ve been treading softly for the last two years, not really dating her and trying to…I don’t know. I guess just being careful. But, here’s to happiness and something new. For both of us. You and me.” He nodded and I smiled.

  It was nice to hear his news.

  He’d found love again, and I was starting to think I had too.

  Chapter 15

  Devon

  I leaned over the pool table with my cue stick and took my shot.

  Rory booed me and made a show of putting his hands at his mouth and howled with laughter as my balls scattered over the pool table, none going down the holes.

  I just laughed.

  I completely sucked at this game but it was fun to play when we were out like this.

  We’d decided on a guys night out.

  Tomorrow was supposed to be my wedding day. It came fast. Real fast.

  This morning when I woke up I thought about it and felt no remorse or weirdness other than remembering what I could have been doing.

  “You suck big time bro. You owe me a drink and a hundred bucks,” Rory bellowed and laughed out loud.

  “You asshole. You’re supposed to be my friend. You’re supposed to take pity on me and not expect me to pay,” I argued, leaning on my stick.

  “Are you kidding me? Cough it up bro. You must be on crack because you know you suck at this game and yet you continue to challenge me.”

  I laughed because he was right. “Maybe I’m living on a wing and prayer that one day things may change and I’ll miraculously be good.”