Me, My Hair, and I

by Shawneda

  Me, My Hair, and I

  Shawneda

  Contents

  Chapter 1

  Chapter 2

  Chapter 3

  Chapter 4

  Chapter 5

  Chapter 6

  Chapter 7

  1

  “So, I’ve been looking through the photos from the shoot.” Aunt Tanya swept into the room. A smile covered her face as she passed her iPhone to me. “We must look into something more distinct. This is your senior year of high school. You need that senior swag.”

  Keylisa followed Aunt Tanya into the room and plopped down on the oversized pillows across from my bed. Big puffs, elbows, and knees were all I saw. “She’s right, JeShaun. You’re almost a woman.”

  “Don’t get carried away, Keylisa.” Aunt Tanya picked the iPhone up and chose an image three years old. “She just turned seventeen.”

  My insides cringed as I bit back the urge to scream. Screaming and tantrums were for children. “I’m sure the pictures you have work fine for your product pics. We’ve had like a gazillion photoshoots.”

  Aunt Tanya dropped down on my bed across from me. Her slender fingers traced the pattern on my duvet cover. I’d picked the pink, salmon, and stripes to match my walls when Uncle Corey took me shopping a few weeks before school started. Accessories on the end of her locs clinked together as she turned her head around to face me. “We haven’t built a business by settling. Our pictures have to be styles that were done using my products.”

  “You’ve been using your products in our hair for the last three years.” I hand her back her phone, unable to force myself to smile to soften the no. “I don’t want to be in your little photo spread or Instagram Lookbook. This is not something that is gonna benefit me in the long run. I’m not going into cosmetology.”

  Keylisa stopped bouncing her knees up and down and turned to stare at me. “JeShaun, don’t be like that. You never wanna do anything fun anymore.”

  “Fun for who?” I walked over to the mirror in my closet. My edges were laying down today, after twenty minutes. I’d never tell Aunt Tanya her cream is the only one that works in under five minutes. I’d planned to ask for some more before she barged in to rope me into another free photoshoot.

  Aunt Tanya sighed. “I’ll be happy to compensate you for your time and the use of your likeness.”

  “I see you and Uncle Corey have been talking, about what I told him in confidence, again.” I made a mental note to pretend to be upset. I knew the only way Aunt Tanya ever listened to my feelings was when I told them to Uncle Corey.

  Keylisa stood up. She tiptoed over to my side and wrapped her arms around my waist. As long as I didn’t look into her eyes, I’d be able to keep my word to myself. No more hair modeling. When people search for me online, I want them to take me serious. “Please, Jeje.”

  Don’t look down. Don’t look down. “I don’t want to do this after I graduate high school. You have to get used to doing the shoots alone at some point, Keylisa.”

  “But you’re here now. You told me not to borrow worries for tomorrow. Why can you do it, but I can’t? That makes you a hypnotist.” Keylisa squeezed me.

  I looked down into those big beautiful brown eyes that made me miss our mother. She pulled on every edge of my heart. I ached. “Hypocrite. Not hypnotist.”

  “You’re the one doing it, not me.” Keylisa let out a long breath and rested her head on me. I felt the sadness under her skin. The same way she felt when we first moved in with Aunt Tanya and Uncle Corey.

  “I’ll think about it.” My arms returned her hug. I kissed the top of her head on her perfect part. The sweet scent of Aunt Tanya’s moisturizer mocking me.

  Aunt Tanya clapped her hands as she tapped her feet on the carpet. “You can even pick the outfits you wear. I just want to style your hair.”

  “Oh, me too. Me too!” Keylisa gave me a happy squeeze before she released me. I didn’t care what she wore as long as it came with her three dimpled smiles. “I have to keep my colors the same for my brand.”

  Aunt Tanya nodded.

  My side hurt from laughing by the time I caught my breath to respond. “Let’s get this done sooner than later, so I can schedule an appointment with Peaches to get my hair straightened.”

  “Unh-unh” Keylisa shook her head as she sat back down on the pillows.

  Aunt Tanya froze. “Excuse me. You know no one else can silken your hair the way I do.”

  “True, but you don’t do relaxers,” I pretended to mess with my hair in the mirror to avoid looking at her.

  “Keylisa, go to your room.” Aunt Tanya rose from my bed. She crossed her arms.

  Keylisa looked at me and shook her head. “Man.”

  “Don’t talk back to Aunt Tanya.” I cleared my throat.

  Aunt Tanya chuckled. “Not working, Missy. Give me a moment to calm down cause I know you didn’t just say what I think you said.”

  “I’m not sure I want an actual relaxer, maybe a texturizer or keratin straightening treatment. Just need to do something different. Like you said, I’m a senior.” My breath caught in my chest as I eased onto the pile of pillows Keylisa left warm.

  Keylisa popped her head back into the doorway. “Can I record a video at your channel station?”

  “Go play video games or do anything that doesn’t involve going in the salon or coming back in here. You can’t distract me with your cuteness.” Aunt Tanya never took her eyes off me. “I’m not a little girl.”

  My eyes met with Keylisa’s as I heard her swallow to buy some time. Her second oldest stall tactic. “Go ahead. I’m sure Auntie isn’t in the mood for drama from both of us. I’ll come play with you when we’re done.”

  “Promise?”

  I nodded with a reassuring smile. “Air pinky promise.”

  We wiggled our pinkies toward each other before her face disappeared.

  “You’re not getting a relaxer JeShaun LaTanya Wright not now, not next week, not ever.” Aunt Tanya uncrossed her arms to place her right hand on her slender hip.

  I took in a deep breath. Sometimes I wish my mother and sister weren’t so close. Every time I did something she didn’t like, Aunt Tanya reminded me my mother loved her so much she named me after her. Stupid childhood sister pinky promises. “I’m pretty sure when I’m eighteen you won’t be able to tell me how to wear my hair. Technically, if I go get it done, you can’t do anything to reverse the process.”

  “Ha… you gonna use me teaching you about hair against… You know what, JeShaun, not today. We’ll pick your fits out for the shoot when your Uncle gets home since you’re in one of your moods.” Aunt Tanya slid her phone into her pocket. “We will discuss this when he gets home. I’m going for a run to clear my head. Before I… I’ll be back.”

  My heart stopped for a moment when Aunt Tanya stopped in my door. She turned around. I saw tears about to spill from her eyes, “You have no idea how much I love you. Maybe one day, you’ll understand.”

  “Aunt Tanya, I know you love me.” I scrambled to my feet. “Please don’t make this about you. This is about me, my hair, and I.”

  Aunt Tanya turned her body back toward me and laughed. “About me… all I’ve ever done since your mother died is adapted, twist, and adjust my life to care for you and your sister, little girl.”

  “Wanting a relaxer isn’t a crime. It’s just hair.” I sighed. “Can we talk about this after you go run? I can tell you’re getting upset your neck is turning red.”

  A tear slipped from the corner of her eye. She turned back around to leave my room. “You have no idea how much everything I’ve built is for you. I can’t wait til you turn eighteen. Til you see how wrong you are about all of this.”

  Uncle Corey’s footsteps wer
e level and calm. He hadn’t talked to Aunt Tanya yet, “Uncle Corey!”

  He poked his head into my doorway “Wassup Buttercup?”

  “Gotta second?” I motioned for him to come in.

  He stood inside the doorway as I crossed my legs on the pillows. “You remember when I told you I needed to talk to you about something important before the product photo shoot?”

  “Yeah.” He sat in the chair in front of my computer desk.

  I cleared my throat. “I didn’t get a chance to tell you before I told Aunt Tanya. She’s really mad.”

  “Tell me what?” Uncle Corey rested his elbows on top of his knees.

  I pushed my index finger into the plush carpet. “I’m going to make an appointment with Peaches to have my hair straightened.”

  “Ha!” Uncle Corey sat up in the chair. “You had me going for a second. Tell me what happened.”

  My hand hovered over the carpet.

  “You’re not kidding?”

  I shook my head.

  “Peaches… and a relaxer?” Uncle Corey dropped his head back. He closed his eyes and massaged his temples. “How long has Tanya been gone?”

  I shrugged. “Not sure. Said she needed to go for a run to clear her head.”

  “Clear her head. Cry.” Uncle Corey lifted his head. “You know you those things are permanent, right?”

  I nod. “Relaxers are but keratin treatments can give you the best of both worlds.”

  Uncle Corey chuckled.

  “All I want to do is finish this year without worrying about my hair frizzing up or going back if I have it silkened during the season. You have no idea how much work it takes to be an athletic teen with natural hair. I just want a slick ponytail and my Saturday mornings back.” I tried not to huff before crossing my arms. “This is my life. Yet I have control over nothing. She said I’m selfish for wanting to have a say in what happens to my hair.”

  Uncle Corey his closed eyes. “You two are going to have to work this out. How you wear your hair is your decision, JeShaun.”

  “That’s what I said.”

  Uncle Corey opened his eyes. “But keeping you healthy and teaching you how to make good decisions is our responsibility. Let’s agree you won’t do anything to your hair until we can all sit down and talk.”

  My stomach knotted. My toes tightened as I snatched my phone off my bed. Every unspoken frustration about being expected to be in the product photoshoot poured through my fingertips onto my phone. By the time I pressed post on Instagram, I felt sweat on top of my upper lip. I grabbed my phone. I stuffed it into my pocket before grabbing my bag to walk to Breyonna’s house.

  I text Uncle Corey to let him know I’d gone for a walk over to Breyonna’s house to hang out until dinner. My emotions crashed around against each other as I stepped out of the back door to the shop. Aunt Tanya’s hair salon did so well right before Mom passed away she’d just purchased a mixed use house in the part of town everyone was building up close to downtown.

  Something about a major investment and retirement money when she sold or some other boring old people talk about appreciating their buildings or something. No matter what she did back then, at some point she had to stop treating me like a moving hair mannequin. Next year I go to college. What will coaches think when they search me online?

  Programs aren’t interested in divas or troublemakers. Who wants to recruit someone they think will need some fancy expensive ethnic hairstyles to be happy? No one. Most of the big ten schools were in podunk rural areas that didn’t even have buses. My grades are good, but what if I don’t go to school somewhere that has a natural stylist nearby?

  Aunt Tanya doesn’t think about anyone but herself. Won’t teach me how to do my hair. I’ve been asking since a few years after we moved in. She keeps forcing me to do these photos. I can hear her voice “I thought people your age liked being the center of attention?”

  Not once did she listen to what I said. Not about liking volleyball more than basketball. Not about not knowing where I’d go to school because I wanted to get as far away from Macon as possible. Nothing I ever said made sense until Uncle Corey wrapped his logic and baritone voice around my feelings.

  Stupid hair photoshoots like I’m still the same age as Keylisa. I wasn’t that young when we moved in after Mom died. She’d never force me to do something I didn’t want to do.

  Buzzz. Buzzz. Buzzz.

  I saw my Aunt’s face flash across the front of my phone. A small icon showed several text messages were waiting for me to read. I placed my phone back in my pocket.

  Buzz. Buzzz. Buzzz.

  I pulled my phone back out of my pocket. Uncle Corey’s face stared up at me. Great. She’d called in reinforcements. “Hey, Uncle Corey.”

  “You both are making it very hard for me to help rehabilitate our youth with all of this back and forth.”

  I stopped walking and took a breath. “We? Your wife is the one trying to control me. Your wife makes me do something she wants me to do without talking to me. I said I’d wait until we talked. You told her, because I know y’all talk about everything. Instead of her keeping her word to wait, she tries to force me to do it by getting her Ask Tanya B minions to pressure me into giving in without hearing anything I have to say. All I did was respond. She put my business out in the world.”

  “Two wrongs don’t make a right, JeShaun. Your post comment has gone viral and people are still talking about it and giving their two-cents which can have a negative impact on the business.” Uncle Corey said.

  Regret danced around the bottom of my stomach. Negative impact on the business? Like lose money because of something posted on social media? “So I’m supposed to be more mature than a grown woman who was too impatient to wait until we were altogether to talk about something that should not even be up for discussion? That doesn’t make any sense, Uncle Corey. Your wife is wrong for trying to make me do something because she can’t tell the difference between what most teenagers want and who I am.”

  “You’re right, JeShaun. You’re also wrong for posting that response to the situation. Why didn’t you call me? Your normal response when your Aunt does something like this. I could have had her archive the post. Change the caption. Anything to keep this from going viral. A random regular post does not get coverage. This has been picked up on Twitter. They’re coming from there to comment.” Uncle Corey sighed.

  Felt like a boulder settled in the pit of my stomach. “No one ever comments on those posts except for her people. How am I supposed to know this would go viral? She’s the adult. I’m getting in trouble for her trying to manipulate me. How is that okay?”

  “You’re not the first person I called.” Uncle Corey paused. “Don’t go to Breyonna’s house. I’m wrapping up. We’ll all finish this discussion when I get home.”

  Cherry blossoms hung down from the trees as I made my way back to the house. The scent of the fresh bread from the bakery floated by on the breeze as I took my time walking up the sidewalk. No one knew how I hated the fuzzy white looking stuff that grew on the trees. Looked like something from a sci-fi movie ready to come to life.

  My stomach rumbled as I walked up the stairs. Uncle Corey’s spinach and mushroom omelet from the morning sat in the dish on the top of the stove. He made sure to make dishes with no meat to make sure I had one cooked meal a day. Aunt Tanya refused to accept my choice to be vegetarian. Three years later she still called me not eating meat or animal products a phase.

  I climbed the steps to the third floor and slipped into my room undetected. Keylisa’s favorite computer game sounds crept into the silence as I flopped down onto my bed. Every teenage girl didn’t want to grow up on Instagram. I preferred volleyball to social media fame.

  My eyes dropped as I lay on the bed listening to my little sister giggle and chat while playing games online with her friends. I’d pose for a thousand photos if I were the only one taking care of Keylisa. She has more say so over her wardrobe and hair at eight than I do abo
ut to graduate from high school. Unreal.

  Knock. Knock. Knock.

  I sprang up on the bed. When did I fall asleep? Ugh. My stomach growled as I remembered why I’d come home instead of making my way to Breyonna’s house for taco night.

  Tap. Tap. Tap. “Jeje, open the door.”

  “It’s open.”

  Uncle Corey, Keylisa, and Aunt Tanya entered the room.

  Keylisa plopped down on the pillows. Aunt Tanya leaned against the wall next to the door. Uncle Corey gestured toward the chair in front of my computer desk. Aunt Tanya shook her head.

  Uncle Corey shrugged as he sat down. “I can’t believe I had to come home early because my wife posted something inappropriate on Instagram.”

  “Excuse me.” Aunt Tanya clutched imaginary pears around her neck. “I’m a grown woman.”

  Uncle Corey rested his ankle across the opposite knee. “Who posted a passive aggressive baited social media request to try to do something you’d kill anyone else for trying to do. Get one of your nieces to do something they’d expressed no desire to do.”

  “No--” Aunt Tanya dropped her hand from her neck and sighed. “I hate when you’re like this, Corey.”

  Keylisa and I exchanged a glance before returning our eyes to Uncle Corey and Aunt Tanya.

  “Don’t try to deflect blame for the mess you two made on me.” Uncle Corey turned and made a silly face at Keylisa. “Two of the people in this room are innocent bystanders. Caught in the line of fire between an ambitious, beautiful adult and an independent, intelligent young lady with opposing motivations and desires.”

  I rolled my eyes. “This is why I’m not going to law school. You’re at home now. You don’t have to talk like this, Uncle Corey.”

  “Now we agree on something.” Aunt Tanya threw her hands up in an exasperated manner.

  Uncle Corey turned so his back was to my computer desk, and everyone was facing each other. “This is not my fault. Don’t hate on a man for enjoying using proper diction. Kids at school weren’t able to bully me into talking slang. Neither will you. Now, back to the matter at hand. What can we do to resolve the media frenzy your passive aggressive post caused thanks to your niece’s aggressive aggressive first comment?”