“Dude, you will not believe what I just heard,” Tab said, appearing at my side.
“Alright, what did you just hear?” I asked warily. “Wait, if this is about another peephole into the girls’ locker room, I’m not interested for a variety of reasons.”
“Rory is gonna run for student council!”
“What?”
“Yeah, Anderson told me during French. Apparently, he saw a poster for student government on his way to his first class and said something to Anderson in passing.”
“Rory does not want to run for student council,” I said. “Wait, does he?”
“He hasn’t said anything to me about it,” Tab replied. “Maybe he was waiting to tell us at lunch or something.”
“Or maybe Anderson is just trying to get the rumor mill going.”
“Don’t you think there are better rumors to start?” Tab suggested.
I winced. I knew that Tab hadn’t meant anything by that, but I was still nervous that I was going to get found out. The image of the large flashing rainbow sign over my head worked its way into my brain for a brief moment. The look on Tab’s face told me that he hadn’t really realized what he had just said.
“Oh shit. Sorry about that, Henry.”
“No reason to be sorry,” I said, shaking my head. “We should just ask him.”
When we entered the classroom, we hurriedly headed over to where Rory had already staked out some seats the the back of the class.
“What the hell, dude,” Tab said as soon as we sat down. “When were you going to tell us?”
“Tell you what?”
“Student council,” Tab hissed. “Anderson said you were going to run for it.”
“I saw the poster,” Rory replied. “I told him I would think about it.”
“Why?” I asked.
“I dunno.” Rory shrugged. “I mean, you said yourself that you wanted a clean slate this year. Maybe it would be good for all of us to try something new.”
“But student government?” Tab asked. “Really? That involves actual work, you know.”
“I can do work, jackhole,” Rory replied.
I sat back and considered what it was that Rory was saying. Maybe he did have a point, or maybe that was another subtle way of him encouraging me to come out at school. Ugh, the big gay flashing sign was back in my mind again. I pushed it away and grabbed my notebook.
“Well, if you’re going to do it, then you need votes, and if that’s the case, then I am totally going to be your campaign manager.” Tab smiled.
“You are?” Rory asked.
I couldn’t help but notice the twinge of worry that fell across his face when Tab announced that particular nugget of information.
“Yup,” Tab said.
“I don’t see how this could go wrong at all.” I smirked.
“Hey, there are worse people.”
“True, he could have volunteered me,” I said.
“Please, you don’t have the contacts that I have,” Tab said.
I raised an eyebrow in confusion. “We pretty much have all the same friends. You know that, right?”
“Oh, I got my sources,” Tab said.
“What does that even mean?” I asked. “Sources? Who do you think you are, like, the CIA or something?”
“I could totally be CIA.”
“You’re sixteen, you cannot be CIA,” I reminded Tab.
“Maybe I’m sort of boy soldier,” Tab suggested.
“No. Just no,” I remarked.
“Never say that again,” Rory added. “You sounded like a total idiot.”
Tab’s very mature response involved him sticking his tongue out at both of us.
I rolled my eyes at settled back in my chair. Hopefully, this class wasn’t going to be a total bust.
CHAPTER 3
“Do or do not.
There is no try.” ~ Yoda
English Lit was awful. I love to read, so I really thought that I would not end up hating the class. That was my first mistake of the day. My second mistake was that just because someone looked like your kindly old grandmother, didn’t mean that she was going to act like it. When we walked into the class, I saw this gentle looking old women sitting behind her desk, flipping through the pages of a book.
I knew from my class schedule that her name was Ms. Hamner, and judging by her ancient-looking exterior, she looked like she had been doing this awhile. A very long while. Her hair had gone white and her eyes were this weird sort of yellow/green. She glanced up at me as I took my seat, but otherwise said nothing.
“I think she could pull a Temple of Doom and rip my heart right out of my chest,” muttered Tab.
And then the class started and she opened her mouth and sounded just like Emperor Palpatine. I shit you not. Trust me, I have watched those movies enough to know. What made matters even worse was she acted like him, too. I wouldn’t have been surprised if she started force choking kids or hurling lightning across the room. I exchanged a worried look with both Tab and Rory.
And her laugh. My god, her laugh. She even cackled like him. Add to that fact that she carried around a yardstick like she was some kind of pissed off samurai warrior and you’ll understand my unease. Apparently, her mission this year was to suck all the joy out of class, along with my soul. Well, maybe not, but that's what it felt like.
After surviving English Lit, I headed to biology, while Rory and Tab headed off to history. Luckily, biology was taught by a pleasantly plump women named Ms. Grover. She had the same intensity and energy that I had seen in my first class with Mrs. Mendoza. I had a feeling that I was going to like her class.
It had nothing to do with the fact that Danny was sitting directly in front of me. Really, I swear that it had no bearing on my enjoyment level whatsoever. Danny was shorter than myself, with red hair, blue eyes, and a muscular build that made me want to decree that he should never be allowed to wear a shirt again. Before anyone points this out, I am well aware that he is a ginger and, according to my brother, therefore has no soul. Perfect abs, perfect pecs, perfect everything. Unlike Hunter, Danny’s personality made him all the more attractive.
“Hey Henry, what’s up?” Danny smiled.
Those dimples, those perfect teeth… I think I managed to kick my brain into gear long enough to say something that sounded vaguely like ‘hey’.
Oh yeah, you’re really smooth, I thought to myself. No way that didn’t sound weird as shit.
I realized I was going to enjoy sitting behind him for numerous reasons. I could stare at his muscular shoulders or get a glimpse of the top of the boxer briefs he wore every time that he moved and his shirt rode up a little. What? Anyways, a little harmless leering never hurt anyone.
“You ready to get back to the gym?” Danny asked, turning around in his seat. “I bet the coach is gonna put us through some serious workouts.”
“Maybe getting married will have mellowed him some,” I suggested with a smile.
“Now, that would be awesome.”
“But, yeah, I think I am ready for it.”
“Cool.”
We didn’t talk much after that, mostly because Ms. Grover launched directly into her lesson plan, which was full of experiments and just a few papers. That was a welcome break from my lit class. After biology, it was time for lunch. Everyone stampede toward the lunch room, nearly running each other over. I don’t know why. It’s not like the food was that good. I think by that time we were all just ready for a break. I grabbed a tray and headed out to the quad to eat.
Tab joined me a few moments later, munching on a sandwich that he had produced from his backpack. He tossed his bag down and then joined me on the bench.
“You’ve seen us naked,” Tab blurted out.
I sighed. “So? you’ve seen me naked. You’ve seen each other naked. Why is that such a big deal?”
Tab looked the quad nervously before speaking. “Well, um, you know. Have you ever checked out our… stuff?”
“
Stuff?” I asked, confused. “What are you talking about?”
Tab vaguely gestured to his crotch.
“What!?!” I snapped. It came out a lot louder than I intended, which caused about half of those students gathered in the quad to snap their heads around in our direction. Tab politely waved and then turned back around to face me.
“Be quiet!”
“Why the hell would you ask me that?” I asked, keeping my voice low. “I mean, really, what the fuck, Tab?”
“Why are you yelling at Tab?” Rory asked, vaulting over the bench. “And why are you blushing again?”
“I was just asking him something–”
“We went over this last night,” I snapped, glancing around to make sure that no one else was in earshot. “No, I don’t think that either of you two are cute, okay?”
“That’s not what I asked,” Tab prodded.
“What did you ask?”
I looked over at Rory and rolled my eyes before glaring back at Tab.
“I asked if he ever, you know, checked out our stuff.”
“You mean our junk?”
I groaned and smacked my notepad against my forehead, which hurt more than I thought it would. Mental note: although it looks dramatic, it’s not worth the headache.
“Equipment, family jewels, dick,” Rory continued. “Actually, hold on. I should google what else you can call your stuff. Oh, package, totally missed that one.”
“And cock,” Tab pointed out.
“What in the hell is wrong with both of you?” I moaned, shaking my head.
“Well, did you?”
I was quickly starting to realize that although my friends might be okay with me being gay, they were probably going to continue to ask stupid questions like this for the rest of my life. I guess there were worse things to happen to someone when they come out.
“No, I didn’t look at your stuff, or whatever it is that you want to call it.”
“Did you look at anyone’s?” Rory asked, nudging my shoulder with his. “Like, say, I dunno Danny’s?”
I smacked myself in the forehead with my notebook again, ignoring the mental note that I made earlier.
“I knew I shouldn’t have told you guys that.”
“We were just kidding around, man,” Rory said. “Besides, even if you did look at my junk, which you say you didn’t and I totally believe you, I wouldn’t really care.”
“For the last time,” I said through clenched teeth. “I. Did. Not. Look. At. Your. Dick.”
“Easy there, man,” Tab said.
“And I didn’t look at yours, either!”
“Okay, okay, we get the picture,” Rory said, putting his hand on my shoulder. “We promise to try and not ask any more dumb questions.”
I knew that was an impossibility. Not because Rory and Tab were dumb. They weren’t. But because they were sixteen like me and every sentence that came out of all our mouths was something dumb. No, really. Have you ever heard a group of sixteen year olds talk? It can be brutal, and I’m one of them.
Tab opened his mouth and then shut it again, apparently thinking better of what he wanted to say next. He did that three more times before I arched an eyebrow at him. “What?”
“Danny?”
They were not going to let this go.
“Yes, fine I looked at Danny, and if you do that fist-pumping happy thing you do when you are right, I swear to every deity in the known world I will kick your ass right here and right now.”
Tab nodded, but otherwise remained silent.
“He sits in front of me in biology,” I said, taking a bite of my apple.
“Who?” Rory asked.
“Danny.”
“I guess that means that class is gonna be interesting for you,” Rory said, wiggling his eyebrows at me.
“Ugh. Again, I should have never have said anything.”
“Wait, I just thought of something!” Rory said suddenly. “That’s why you like antiques.”
“Huh?” I asked. I really had no idea where this was going, although given the past several conversations I had with the two of them I probably should have figured it out.
“You’re gay, that’s why you like antiques.”
“What. The. Fuck,” I said. “Does that mean you’re straight cause you like baseball?”
“Wait, what?”
“But you like baseball, too,” Tab pointed out. “And football, and soccer… oh, I think I see your point now.”
“I don’t like antiques because I’m gay,” I snapped, keeping my voice low so that only Tab and Rory could hear me. “I like them because I like them. Just like you don’t like baseball because you’re straight; you like it because you like it.”
“I guess I sounded like a dick there, didn’t I?” Rory asked.
“Oh, you have no idea.”
“So, about this student council thing, are you serious?” Tab asked.
I looked over at Rory, actually happy to have attention diverted from me for a change. Even if it only lasted a few minutes.
“I have the form right here,” Rory replied, pulling it from his backpack. “You still wanna help out?”
“Absolutely!” said Tab, rubbing his hands together. He looked almost maniacal when he did that.
“You sort of look like some sort of evil politician when you do that,” I pointed out with raised eyebrows. “Please stop. Rory, are you sure about this? I mean, it’s a lot of hard work and commitment. Do you think that you can keep up with everything? Gymnastics, this, your school work?”
“Thanks, mom,” Rory grumbled, rolling his eyes. “I got this. Besides, we don’t even know if I’ll get elected or not. People have to vote for me and see me as all responsible and stuff.”
“I hope that you aren’t going to base your campaign on being responsible and stuff. Or use it as your slogan,” I said.
“Aren’t you supposed to be supportive?” Rory asked.
I nodded. It wasn’t that I didn’t think that Rory could do it. He was smart enough and more popular than he probably knew. I was just trying to figure out exactly why he would want to do it. I guess that was his business and not mine.
“If you want to, man, I got your back,” I said. “Except for the asking Shawna out. You are totally on your own for that one.”
“I told you, by the end of the year she won’t be able to keep her hands off me.” Rory smiled. “Besides, I am totally going to blow her away with my smooth moves at the fall talent show. So much that she’ll have no choice but to go to Homecoming with me.”
“That’s like two months away,” Tab pointed out. “A lot can happen in two months.”
“You’re thinking about Homecoming already?” I asked. “Jesus, dude. That seems so far away.”
“And did you say talent show?” added Tab.
Rory looked at both me and Tab with this giant grin on his face. I did not like that grin. That grin usually got us into some kind of trouble. The last time Rory grinned like that, we all went for a joyride in his dad’s new four-wheeler. The vehicle had been returned without any damage, save the fact that it and we were covered in mud. We thought we got away with it, too, until Rory’s dad came downstairs and caught us stripping off our muddy clothes. Needless to say, Rory had been grounded for the better part of June.
“You’re grinning like a creeper again,” I pointed out. “Stop that.”
“I’m gonna sign up for the talent show.”
“Wait, you’re gonna do what?” Tab asked, shaking his head. “You have to be on stage in front of the whole school. You know that, right?”
“Jesus, you two, have a little faith in me!” Rory snapped. “Yeah, I know that I will be up on stage in front of the whole school. I’m not an idiot.”
“Sorry, sorry,” I quickly apologized. “It’s just that, well, you never wanted to do anything like this before.”
“I don’t think he ever wanted to impress a girl like this before,” Tab said.
“You’re rea
lly doing all this for a girl?” I asked.
“Yes… no… maybe some of it for a girl.” Rory shrugged. “But also because of what you said earlier. You know, about starting this year off with a clean slate.”
“What are you going to do for your talent?” Tab prodded. He had finished his sandwich and was busy munching on a peach. “Backflips across the stage or something?”
“That sounds dangerous,” I said. “The stage really isn’t all that big.”
“I’m going to sing,” Rory declared.
I looked at Tab, who looked at me, and then we both looked at Rory, and then back at each other, and then back at Rory.
“Sing?” I asked.
“Sing.”
“You can sing?” Tab said, raising his eyebrows. “We’ve never heard you sing.”
“Just because you haven’t seen me do something doesn’t mean that I can’t do it,” Rory retorted.
“Eh, he’s right about that,” I replied, looking over at Tab. “Maybe he’s a good singer.”
“I’m an excellent singer,” Rory insisted.
I quirked an eyebrow in his direction. “Um, I guess we’ll just have to wait and see.”
“So, what are you going to sing?” Tab prodded. “Some sort of eighties power ballad?”
“Do you even know any eighties power ballads?” I asked.
“Do either of you even know what a power ballad is?” Rory replied.
“Yes,” both of us answered at the same time. It sounded a little creepy.
“You’ll just have to go to the talent show and find out.” Rory grinned. “And on that note, we need to talk about dates.”
I shook my head. I could practically hear this conversation already and I was not looking forward to having it. Actually, scratch that. I wasn’t going to have it all.
“Oh no, you are not backing out of our first Homecoming dance,” Tab said, pointing a finger at me.
“What?”
“You’re doing that thing,” Tab continued, waving his hand vaguely in my direction. “That thing where you completely ignore everything that we’re saying because you don’t think that it applies to you.”
“Does it, though?” I asked, trying to sound innocent. I had a feeling that neither of them would buy it.
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