Rocks Fall Everyone Dies

by Eddie Skelson

  ‘Do you think that gives them the right to be so bloody rude?’

  ‘Well, no. I suppose not. But I usually find it’s best to just ignore them. The last thing you need is one of them losing his temper and making your teeth explode.’

  ‘Fair comment.’ Daisy said. ‘What do you think of the girl?’

  ‘Ah, Felicity, Felicity, she fills me with electricity!’ He said, then chuckled to himself. ‘I’m not sure. She’s quite delightful in manner but…’

  ‘But?’ Daisy pressed him.

  ‘But I can’t help but think that there is more to all of this than she is letting on.’

  ‘Too many coincidences?’ Daisy said, realising she was voicing her own concerns.

  ‘My dear, history is built on coincidences.’ Valeran said, ‘My concern is that this group or fellowship, or whatever it is, is not a carefully selected number of people drawn together through a common interest. We are all headed to the same destination, but each has entirely different reasons. Our only common ground is that none of us really appear to get on.’

  ‘We get on.’ Daisy said and smiled at him.

  Despite how they had met, and she understood that she had leaned on the Cleric to get herself into a group, she actually begun to quite like him. He was short-tempered, no doubt of that and he certainly had the arrogance and swagger of almost every other Cleric she had ever met, but he did have a certain charm about him.

  ‘Yes, I rather think we do.’ Valeran replied. ‘My brains and beauty, and your brawn.’

  He returned Daisy’s smile, and they laughed.

  ***

  Donalt cleared the area around his fire ready for the meeting. He liked to organise things and had a tidy mind, compartmentalising things for fast retrieval. This was vital when working with numerous locks, recipes for poison or determining where to jab a stiletto blade into someone to paralyse them, but not kill them. Or to kill them.

  He continued to fuss about the camp as Felicity approached.

  ‘Hello.’ She said.

  ‘Morning.’ Donalt replied. She was very pretty. It was distracting.

  ‘You are an excellent cook.’ Felicity said.

  ‘Thanks.’ Donalt replied.

  He realised he had cleared as much of the area as he could but didn’t want to talk to the girl directly, so he began to wipe a cloth over his pack.

  ‘Have you and your friend been partners long?’ She asked

  ‘About ten years.’

  ‘That’s quite a long time.’

  ‘S’pose.’ Donalt replied.

  He felt uncomfortable. He liked women. Liked them a lot. But he rarely got a chance to spend any real time with one. Most of the ladies he engaged with charged by the hour so talking to them was something of a luxury.

  ‘I do hope you will both agree to come on to the Quest.’

  ‘Depends on the split.’ Donalt replied, trying to sound as business-like and indifferent as he could, but the fact was they had to disappear for a while, maybe a long while. ‘Me and Andreton don’t work cheap.’

  ‘I’m sure we can all figure it out between us.’ Felicity said.

  ‘Hmm. Sounds like a fellowship to me.’ Donalt said, as he finally built up the courage to stand and face her. ‘Too many people for a group.’

  ‘You are thinking that you could perhaps lose the Mystic, and maybe the Fighter as you have Andreton.’ Felicity said without dropping her smile.

  ‘Er… no.’ Donalt said hurriedly. ‘I just meant that the swag… Groups work on a percentage and fellowships are…’

  ‘Too democratic?’

  ‘Awkward.’ Donalt said.

  ‘OK, well. We can talk about it in the meeting. I’m looking forward to it.’

  ‘Yeah. Me as well.’ Donalt replied with no conviction.

  Felicity’s smiled widened, and he felt his blood heat a little, then she turned away and walked over to Dorian. The Blink-Dog poofed into sight at her heels. Donalt shook his head to clear thoughts that had no place being inside his head when things were so chaotic.

  ***

  The meeting was convened once the sun had risen high enough to light the whole of the land around them. The adventurers, having made themselves presentable, gathered around Francis as Felicity was leaning against the animal, waiting. There was a low murmur of chatter which quickly reduced to a grumble, which stopped as Felicity spoke.

  ‘So, here we all are. Brought together by fate? Perhaps. Or possibly through something grander, maybe the will of the Gods.’ She glanced at Valeran. ‘Whatever the reason, we all came to the Town for the same purpose. Each of us sought a Quest, and adventurers to join us on that Quest. I don’t know what any of you did before travelling here, but I can tell you that in my visions I saw each of you. I saw this very moment, with all of us assembled, undecided, unsure. I didn’t see the explosion, or the big fight, or this lady,’ Felicity patted the hairy side of Francis. ‘That was as much of a surprise to me as I’m sure it was to you.’

  Corbett reddened. Francis gently mooed.

  ‘I haven’t seen much past this moment.’ Felicity said. ‘And I have bathed in the Essence more than it is safe too, purely to try and determine what, should you agree to proceed into the mountains, we might find there.

  But I have great faith that something wonderful will come to all of us if we journey together. So, Dorian, Andreton, Donalt, Daisy, Corbett and Valeran, what say you?’

  They all stood silent, avoiding each other’s eyes for a few moments, then slowly looking around to see who might be the first to comment. It was tradition to offer your service to a party leader through representation of your weapon, or skill, or honour. It was, to the surprise of everyone, Daisy who stepped forward first.

  ‘You have my sword.’ She said.

  Valeran immediately followed her, ‘And my staff.’ He said. Despite still not owning a staff. The principle was that at some point when he obtained a staff the statement would stand.

  ‘And Andreton’s Axe.’ Andreton said, stepping up and bouncing the head of Dennis in his hand.

  ‘I give you my dagger.’ Donalt said, peeved that Andreton had stepped up first.

  ‘My bow is yours.’ Dorian said. ‘For you and for our endeavour.’

  All eyes now turned to Corbett.

  ‘Me? No. You can all fuck off.’

  The group immediately broke out in gasps and chunters of disbelief.

  ‘Moan all you like. I’m not going.’ Corbett said. ‘Find yourself another mug.’

  ‘Mug?’ Daisy said. ‘That’s a bit strong isn’t it Wizard? You seemed quite keen back at the Tavern. Do you recall? Before you blew it up?’

  ‘Nice try princess, but I was there to check out Doctor Dingbat.’ He pointed at Valeran. ‘Not to be dragged by cow into some mad pick-up group.’

  ‘This is not a pick-up group Corbett.’ Felicity implored, ‘We have been brought together by purpose, not by chance.’

  ‘So you say. But I don’t recall our Cleric mentioning any God stuff. Unless of course…,’ at this Corbett paused, making sure that everyone was hanging on his words. ‘…unless you are chasing a Prophecy.’

  Gasps once again filled the air around the adventurers. The smile on Felicity’s face dropped a little while her eyes narrowed and burned into Corbett.

  ‘You just happened to have these visions eh? That led you directly to the town. And you just happened to turn up while I was making my pitch to Doctor Doom, right.’

  ‘Why does he keep making up names for me?’ Valeran quietly asked of Daisy.

  ‘Because he’s a dick.’ Daisy replied.

  ‘And then,’ at this Corbett began to pace in front of the others, one hand raised, finger pointing up, the other hand gripping his cloak, ‘by some absolute miracle, this enormous hairy bastard suddenly decides to lose its shit and go barrelling through the crowds and take all of us except for the tree hugger with it. And of course, it’s none other than our noble Doreen who brought you here i
n the first place.’

  Corbett spun with a flourish. ‘Deny that, Ranger!’

  ‘I deny it.’ Dorian said with a tone so neutral that Corbett lost his train of thought for a moment.

  ‘What?’ Corbett asked.

  ‘He denies it Corbett.’ Felicity stepped to him, her smile had no completely departed. ‘He didn’t bring me you dolt. I brought him. I used a magic circle to bring us both.’

  Corbett frowned, ‘Nonsense. Mystics can’t make a magic circle.’

  Felicity sighed. ‘I’m not a Mystic.’ She then turned to the group who were watching with popcorn-munching expectation. ‘I’m a Sorceress.’

  The inevitable gasps followed this admission and the now traditional chuntering.

  Valeran now came forward and stood at the side of Corbett. ‘A Sorceress?’ He asked, incredulous. ‘But you are so nice! And sorcery is so nasty!’

  It was true. Sorcerers were considered to be far too shifty to party with. Male, female or those who chose as it suited them, it made no difference, Sorcery was a dark art, an insidious stepchild of witchcraft, the drug-addicted cousin with a string of restraining orders to Necromancy. A strange of blend of the

  unspoken elements of magical manipulation that earned its fearful reputation because of its followers penchant for communing with Demons.

  Felicity nodded, looking up at Valeran from eyes that had suddenly become tearful.

  ‘I had no choice. No one will willingly take along a Sorceress, but a Mystic? Everyone loves a Mystic, and so I had to pretend. I had to because we have to quest together, it has to be all of us!’

  ‘Prophecy.’ Valeran said, he couldn’t help the quiver in his voice breaking his words. ‘You saw this.’

  Felicity nodded, the tears now streamed down her cheeks. ‘A Prophecy.’

  It was to everyone’s surprise that Andreton strode forward, and Corbett and Valeran found themselves instinctively shuffling aside to let him through. The warrior placed a single giant finger under Felicity’s chin and gently lifted so she looked him directly in his ocean-blue eyes.

  ‘Vot is the prophecy child?’ He asked, with a voice so sympathetic that even Corbett felt his heart flutter a little.

  ‘It’s… we… we have to find the Gate, the Rogues Gate, and enter. All of us at once.’

  ‘Vhy at once? Is important?’

  ‘It’s prophecy.’ Felicity said, strangely calm, lost in the huge man’s eyes. ‘You have to try and match the Prophecy, what I saw, if you do then everything might be OK.’

  ‘What do you mean, everything might be OK?’ Dorian stepped up, and as he did so the others began to close around Felicity. Keen to hear. ‘What did you see. How did you have this vision?’

  ‘A Demon.’ Felicity said quietly, almost whispering. ‘It said its name was Moloch. It said that the Prophecy of the Lost Gate was close, and that if I wanted to prevent the burning of the world I… I had to bring you all together, to make the Prophecy happen.’

  They all leaned in, desperate to hear the Sorceress.

  ‘Demons lie.’ Dorian said, flatly.

  ‘Bloody right they do.’ Corbett said.

  All eyes turned to him.

  ‘Sorry.’ He said.

  ‘Yes, I know. But it was Moloch who showed me the Prophecy. He is in it. If the Lost Gate isn’t found and its quest completed, he will be destroyed also. I saw it. His Hell will be lost in the Void along with our world!’

  Hearing this Corbett did something he preferred not to. He summoned his Demons.

  ‘What the fuck?’ Carl said.

  Corbett twitched as he could feel the demon scratching at himself.

  ‘Did you just summon me Corbs?’ Carl asked with genuine surprise.

  ‘I need your help.’ Corbett asked through his thoughts.

  He rarely bothered speaking to the demon secretly. People didn’t really listen to him when he talked to himself anyway, and if they did it never hurt for them to think he was a little touched.

  ‘Ooh. Secret communication eh? Must be important. Or embarrassing.’

  ‘I need to know about a demon and a prophecy.’ Corbett said. Ignoring Carl’s flippancy.

  ‘Ok. Challenge accepted. Whatch’ya got?’

  ‘The demon is Moloch, the Prophecy is the Lost Gate.’ Corbett said. ‘I think it’s something to do with a Rogue.’

  ‘Hmm. Moloch’s a pretty common name. A lot of demons use the names of the Big Guys. Y’know, Beezlebub, Baal, Azazael. His real name is probably something like Chris, or Tarquin, ha! Tarquin… Cracks me up every time. But if he’s tied to a particular prophecy I can probably fish him out.’

  ‘Thanks.’ Corbett said.

  He turned his attention back to the Sorceress.

  ‘…so I had to come. I used sorcery to scare Francis. I knew… I just knew that we would all get through with her.’

  She was talking to Daisy now. Corbett noticed that the Fighter had her hand resting on the hilt of her sword.

  ‘Are you saying the cow is part of this?’ Valeran asked.

  Francis mooed. Coincidence, the Cleric was certain.

  ‘I think so.’ Felicity said but offered no more.

  ‘Dear dear.’ Valeren said, shaking his head. ‘I’m not sure about this. Not sure at all.’

  ‘Why did you call the Gate the Rogue’s Gate?’ Dorian asked.

  ‘He knows where a Gate is, or at least he did in the vision.’ Felicity said, pointing to Donalt.

  Donalt looked startled at this. He hadn’t told anyone about the map. Except for Andreton, who he was convinced still wasn’t entirely sure what a map was.

  ‘She didn’t say map.’ He thought. ‘She doesn’t know about the map. If they don’t know that I don’t actually know where the gate is, I might be able to score from this.’ ‘Yeah. The Rogues Gate. That’s right.’

  ‘Ve haff Gate?’ Andreton asked.

  ‘Yeah. Course we do mate. Remember. The Rogues Gate. We’ll talk about it in a bit.’ Donalt knew he had to work fast before this group began to make up their own mind and formulate opinions that sided with safety and not profit. Also, if he didn’t get into a Gate soon there could well be an army after him. ‘Which sounds to me like she’s got a point, and as I’m the one with the location of a Gate, and I believe the fact that she probably just lost her party leader privileges would suggest that I become party leader.

  ‘No.’ Dorian said firmly. ‘You can’t be serious. A Rogue leading a quest? We may as well hand over our purses now.’

  Donalt bristled at this and stepped up to the Ranger.

  ‘You want to elaborate on that mate?’ He snapped, fuming.

  At this moment Spyra suddenly appeared on Dorian’s shoulder and stared with adorable ferocity at the Rogue.

  ‘Whoa guys.’ Daisy said deftly moving between them. ‘Let’s not start this now. She turned her head to the Ranger. ‘Dorian, that was incredibly rude.’

  To his credit the Ranger did appear a little abashed as Daisy scolded him.

  ‘And Donalt. Let’s be fair. Your profession does carry with it a degree of… well, roguishness, I mean you’re not called ‘stalwarts’, are you?’

  Donalt took a short step back. ‘S’pose.’ He grudgingly admitted.

  ‘We don’t need to change the leader.’ Valeran said, and now all heads turned to him. ‘Yes, the girl misled us about her profession and yes, she manipulated us to some degree. But her intentions appear to be sound. She has been polite and truthful I believe, certainly, when it matters. If the child has seen this adventure in a vision the she already knows more about what lies behind this Rogues Gate than any of us.’

  A very low mumble of agreement followed this.

  ‘We presently have all of the skills would could hope to take into a Gate. ‘We also it appears, have a member who will lead us to a Gate, and that scene back at the Town came about because there are dozens of groups who have failed to locate a Gate, let alone complete a quest.’

  More posit
ive murmurs sounded, and a few heads nodded. ‘Allow me to be the radical amongst this gathering. I suggest Felicity maintains her role as party leader. She has had visions, she had the wherewithal to bring us together and I will be the first to admit that I don’t hold with her style of magic, but Sorcery can be a strong ally when pushed to use it.’

  No mumbles or whispered opinion followed, instead there was only thoughtful silence. Then, as though consent had been reached via telepathy all eyes turned to Corbett. It was now back to him. He carried the fate of the quest, and possibly of them all if the girl’s visions were to be believed, within his decision.

  ‘Pfft. Whatever.’ He said. Throwing his hands up in the air with resignation.

  Still all eyes were upon him.

  He sighed. ‘Oh, for fucks sake.’

  He turned to Felicity. Pressed the flat of his hand across his chest. And bowed a little.

  ‘And you have my wand.’ He said, and then immediately added, looking around to the party, ‘Which I don’t have by the way, we don’t use them you know. It’s all just marketing. I could do the same spell if I pointed a cake at you.’

  Andreton’s huge hand dropped on his shoulder, making Corbett wince.

  ‘Vell done little bony man. Ve all friends now and go on adventure. Zis is Dennis.’ Andreton swung his huge axe as easily as if it was made of straw. ‘Dennis vill make unhappy anyvon who make little Vizard unhappy.’

  Corbett gulped.

  ‘Thanks…’ He croaked.

  The chunters and mumbles turned to light conversation consisting of ‘looking ahead, and going forwards, and kicking off the project.’ The words of people with zero belief or confidence in what they were about to do but who had to look on the bright-side, as the other option was a long walk home with nothing to show for their troubles.[6]

  The gathering began to break up and each went about the task of preparing their packs but talk soon began of the shortfalls of the group. For a start they did not all have mounts. Corbett was especially agitated as he couldn’t even intimate that he would require a lift or be offered a mount without breaking his Oath. He hovered around each cluster of the party whenever the matter arose hoping to spot a chance to somehow indicate his predicament. Fortunately, and to his surprise, it was Felicity who solved the problem.