Dirty Rotten Seizure

by Andrew Bardsley

  “Ok, hold tight, as we are off!”

  Ahava woke up as the light slowly increased, but this time it was not shining through the bathroom window. The first thing he noticed, as he was coming back to consciousness, was the smell. It was hard to describe, but it was a dry, slightly musty heat. The smell stirred memories from his childhood of when he lived in parts of Africa. It smelt like the morning, when he had been camping with his parents and siblings. He could hear the early morning calls of birds, sharp twitterings repeated at intervals of different levels of pitch and volume. In addition, he heard the noise of what he thought sounded like crickets. This was the low undulating whistling sound that could be heard as a constant background noise.

  As he opened his eyes, he could see the sun start to peek above the hills in the distance. The light level slowly increased as he started to see the shape of what looked like roots, sticking up into the air as if a tree had been planted upside-down. Others looked like jagged umbrellas of leaves on the trunk with twisting branches. The light level gradually continued to increase across undulating plains as they opened into waving grass in a slight wind. Below him, he could see a river flow into a large lake with deep green grass around the banks. He looked away from the view in front of him and found that he was on a slope, on a hill with craggy rock cliffs behind him.

  Ahava realized he was currently sitting on the ground, with his back pressed against a rock and no idea how he had got there. He was wearing the same jeans and T-shirt that he had left the house in. His laptop bag was still on his shoulder by his side, as it had been when he exited the carriage. As he came to the slow acknowledgement of his surroundings, he felt his heart beat faster and a cold sweat begin to form on his forehead. Suddenly, there was a sharp pain on his ankle. Roaring in pain, he jumped up from the ground he had been sitting on. Shuffling around, he found a small insect on his ankle between his jeans and his left sock. Quickly he flicked off the insect, which left behind a slightly red mark, still throbbing in pain. Rubbing the mark, he straightened up and walked around as he looked at the landscape again.

  Confused in regard to what was happening, he remembered the last thing he saw: the system logo and options. A jumble of questions cascaded into his mind, the most pressing being: where am I, who is the ‘History System’ and perhaps the most pressing, how do I get back home?

  “Good morning,” spoke a dulcet voice. “Good morning and how are you today—.”

  Before the voice could say any more Ahava interrupted. “What?” exclaimed Ahava. “Who’s there?”

  “The voice inside your head,” replied the voice in the same smooth overtone.

  Ahava scanned the area quickly to see if there was anyone else present. There was nobody in sight. He thought that, along with the rest of the experience, he must be going crazy.

  ”Yes,” said the agreeable voice again. “You are certainly going crazy and possibly becoming delusional too, as all of this experience gives impressions that are contradicted by reality or rational argument.”

  Not only am I hearing a voice inside my head, it is also telling me that I am crazy, Ahava thought.

  “I can hear your direct thoughts, you know.”

  Still looking around the area for anything to explain this voice and on the edge of panic, Ahava felt his heartbeat quicken again. Now it can hear my thoughts.

  “Ok, relax, it was only a joke,” said the voice soothingly. “You are not crazy or even delusional. This is all real, or at least as real as anything can be. I need you to calm down, so you can pay attention to what I need to say, as you have a lot to do today.”

  Still stunned about the situation, Ahava found himself trying to calm down and take stock of what was happening. Generally being a practical person, he thought it was better to find out more about had happened.

  “Ok,” said Ahava, “I’ll let you explain.”

  “First,” said the voice in what appeared to be a satisfied tone, “let's start off with me. You have the great pleasure of speaking to the ‘History System Interface.’ As that is a bit of a mouth-full, you can call me Thoth.”

  “Right,” said Ahava, “so then … Thoth. What is happening? Where am I and how do I get back home?”

  “If you keep interrupting,” said Thoth, more impatiently now, “then we’ll just be wasting time, as you have a lot to do to get through today.”

  Thoth continued as if he had never been interrupted. “Ok, the answers to all your questions will be given to you at some point in the future, but for now it’s better if we just cover the basics. You were brought in to help, which will be explained fully to you later. It is my job to help you get ready for those tasks, and from the looks of you, you're going to need a lot of my help! The important information you need to start with, and the question you should have asked is ‘how to survive in this environment.’ Where you are now is ... How can I say this?” Thoth paused as if considering. “Not as safe as where you come from. In fact, it’s probably better to say that it’s downright dangerous here. Also, there are some important differences in the laws of physics and metaphysics.

  “To help with your development, I have provided a familiar system that will guide, strengthen and enlighten you for the tasks that lie ahead. As you do activities that are beneficial to the task, you’ll get points, and what do points get you... prizes.

  “These ‘prizes’ are in the form of abilities and items you will need,” Thoth concluded.

  “Ok,” said Ahava, “not one for details, are you?”

  “Right, you are,” shot back Thoth “All the basic details of the system are on your tablet and phone, as well as some other information that will help. The devices have also have been improved a bit to start with. I suggest when you get some time, you should try them out. But you really should understand the basic survival skills before sunset tonight, as most of the wild animals hunt at night. In fact, you should be moving on.”

  “So then,” said Ahava, “what are the basics?”

  “Well,” said Thoth plainly, “you are out in the middle of nowhere with almost no food or water and no shelter. So my guess is that those three things should be the first items on your list. Also, as a top tip, you may want to make your shelter defendable from animals.

  “Ok, that’s it; the pep talk is over. Good luck! I will talk to you later, when you get settled in. Ta-ta for now.” Thoth’s voice ceased.

  “That is…” shouted Ahava. “That's all the information I get? You useless... whatever you are!” The slight echoes of the sound played off the cliffs in the distance.

  Ahava stood there, waiting for an answer, but the only sounds were the crickets and birds with their morning calls.

  Page Break

  Chapter Two: Survival

  Yes, Ahava was angry and also confused, but the need to survive was paramount. This was the driving force in his mind for now. He thought that he should have a look around the local area and see what resources were available.

  As he was located on a hill, he had a good view of the immediate area. Close by and down the hill was a wooded area. Behind him, he remembered the rocky cliffs. Ahava wondered if there was a cave or a small alcove in the rocks that he could use for a temporary shelter. With a fire lit in front of the entrance, it could protect him during the night.

  Ahava walked toward the rock cliff, muttering about the injustice of the situation. The cliff face was about fifty meters high in the center, tapering down to twenty meters at the edges. The shape was like a horseshoe, with a narrow entrance toward the plains, lake and distant hills. He walked through the narrow entrance and found the area the cliffs surrounded was about half the size of a football pitch. There were a lot of loose rocks at the bottom of the cliff, in addition to large cracks in the cliff. Walking around the area he found a large opening at about head height in the cliff face. There were some handholds and enough loose rocks to step on that he thought he could climb up to the opening.

  It had been a long time that he had been
rock climbing so he slowly eased up the rock face. Standing on the ledge to the opening in the cliff, he looked into the cave. There was enough light to see the back of the small cave that was the size of a small van. This was perfect for what he wanted for sheltering tonight.

  Great, thought Ahava. I will set up camp here for the night, as the ledge will offer some protection from animals and if I build a fire in the entrance, that should deter any unfriendly visitors. Now to go check out the wooded area to see if I can get some wood for a fire.

  It was a few minutes' walk from the cave in the cliff face to the start of the wooded area. The wood was on a slight downward gradient with varying sizes of trees. In between the trees were bushes of different types and even some flowers. There was a lot of dead wood on the ground. As he walked farther into the wooded area, he heard the sound of trickling water. A little farther into the wood and in a dip in the ground was a small brook flowing down the hill and through the wooded area.

  Wow, thought Ahava, it's like a really good starting area in a game I used to play with the kids.

  For the next hour, Ahava collected dead wood to the bottom of the cave entrance. This was done by a mixture of carrying and dragging large branches. By the end, he was very wet from sweat and had some small cuts on his arms.

  Quite a bit of exercise for an overweight office worker, he thought.

  Some of the large branches had a bush of smaller branches with large, closely packed thorns. This reminded Ahava of a documentary he watched about how some African villages used thorns to protect against predators.

  This, he thought, would be an ideal way of blocking the small, narrow entrance to the horseshoe-shaped area enclosed by the cliffs.

  Pulling and pushing some of the thorny branches, he managed to block off the entrance, with the thorns to the outside.

  The next item on the list was to try and start a fire. As he had been in the scouts when he was young and due to many camping holidays, he was pretty good at setting up a fire. The only problem was that the starting of a fire without matches or a lighter is very difficult. The two methods he knew of involved either using a flint striking steel or heat from friction from rubbing wood. As he had no flint, the only option was to use the wood friction method. Ahava understood that the best way to do this was to use a flat section of wood with a notch at the edge. Under the notch, you place the tinder to ignite, using a bow to turn the wooden rod while applying pressure with a stone on top of the wooden rod.

  He set up the wood ready for the embers from the tinder to light. Making the bow was a bit problematic as he had no string or rope. In the pile of firewood that he brought back from the wooded area, there was some fibrous plant that would do for the bowstring. With all the equipment in place, it took a couple of hours to get the fire going. The main problem was moving the wooden rod fast enough to get any heat. If looks could kill the tinder would have burst into flame from Ahava’s look after the first half an hour.

  With the fire blazing away, it was time to start thinking about the other necessities for his survival.

  Righty, thought Ahava, I have someplace to shelter for the night and a fire, with enough firewood to get me through the night. The next things I need are food and water. Oh, a weapon is needed too.

  Looking around and thinking about what would make a good weapon, he saw in the woodpile a meter-long stick with a large stump at its bottom. Picking it up and hitting it on the ground a bit, he found it to be very sturdy. He stripped off the excess bark and any twigs on the stick. Then he carried the club out of his makeshift enclosure toward the brook to collect some water.

  When Ahava arrived at the flowing water in the brook, he looked up and down the stream to check for any animals. He stepped on a stone at the edge of the brook and drank the water with a cupped hand. Thinking of how to get water back to his campsite for the night, he remembered that he had an empty water bottle in his bag. Filling this up, he put it back in the bag for later. Looking up from the water he saw a small animal move through the undergrowth of the wood. Hoping to catch up to it and maybe kill it for food, he jumped up and ran in its the direction.

  As he ran, he had little hope of catching up with it. He did not have a lot of endurance and expected the small animal to run away when attacked. When he got closer the small animal looked like a rabbit. The rabbit heard him approach and looked toward Ahava. Expecting the rabbit to make a run for it, Ahava slowed down, as he thought he would not be able to catch up with it in time. To his surprise, the rabbit stood on its hind legs and howled. When it finished the howl, it charged at Ahava. Its mouth was open, showing sharp, cat-like teeth. Before he could do anything with his club the rabbit had reached him and was biting at his jeans legs, tearing them. He swiped his club down toward his leg and managed to hit the rabbit several meters away from him. Looking up from the rabbit, on the ground, he saw out of the corners of his eyes that several other rabbits were running toward him from a different direction. What best describes the following screen is a mad golfer swinging for his life, with fur and blood flying in all directions. Finally, Ahava was left standing there, bent over and breathing heavily, with five dead and dismembered bunnies surrounding him.

  No rabbit acts like that, thought Ahava. What psycho animals are these things?

  Wanting to get away quickly, before anything else came along, Ahava picked up the bodies of the rabbits, leaving a few heads on the ground. He walked quickly away from the gruesome scene and up the hill toward the campsite. He arrived back at the campsite, where he dropped the rabbits on a rock and flopped down, putting his head in his hands.

  Where am I that as such creatures exist? thought Ahava. Well, at least I have something to eat now.

  With a heightened concern for the dangers in this world, Ahava started increasing the defenses for entrance to his campsite. He spent the next hour dragging more thorn bushes from the wood, to increase the barrier that was blocking the entrance, all the time keeping an eye out for rabid animals.

  After the defensive improvement, he managed to calm down a bit and start thinking about using the rabbits. In the past, he had skinned rabbits a few times for eating. He had no knives or any other tool for any skinning. In his bag, he had his house and other keys. Picking one that was jagged he tried to skin the rabbits. Ahava ended up with five very rough-cut rabbit hides and a pile of meat and bones. All the guts and other bits that he did not want to deal with, he dug a small hole and buried. This, he thought, would help not attract any other animals by the smell if it was buried.

  The next issue was cooking the meat for it to be edible. As he had no equipment for cooking, he decided to try and use some stones to cook the food. This was done by placing them in the fire and heating them up. He then used the hot stone to slowly cook the meat. The end result was a pile of slightly burnt cuts of meat with grit from the rocks in it.

  Slowly he ate the meat as he thought about the situation he was in. This was the first time he’d had to rest. Memories of his family flooded into his mind. He worried about what they thought of him missing. He wondered how he could get back home. In his mind, he was determined to get home but could think of no way to accomplish this. The next time he got to talk to Thoth he would give him a piece of his mind.

  After he ate his meal and drank some of the water he had in his bag, it was starting to get late. Ahava decided that it was time to get prepared for the night. Having collected enough wood to get through the night, he managed with a bit of climbing and some throwing to get most of the wood onto the ledge. He set up a fire on the ledge and then lit it from the fire on the dirt in the ground. He used some of the wood to sit on behind the fire and in the cave. As the evening had progressed the air got a bit cooler.

  Thinking about what to do next, Ahava remembered that there was some information about the ‘The History System’ on his phone and tablets. He pulled his laptop bag over to his side and pulled out the tablet. Switching on the screen, he saw his normal unlock screen. He swiped to unl
ock and looked at the home page. The first things he noticed were there were some more applications and the battery symbol had been replaced by an infinity symbol.

  The new applications were H-Mail, H-Shopping-Bay, H-TV, H-Stats, H-Tasks, H-Journal, H-Knowlogy, and H-Maps. Ahava noticed that the one new mail in the H-Mail application. Opening the application, he clicked on the mail and started reading:

  --

  From: Thoth

  To: Ahava

  Date: 1st day

  Subject: Welcome

  Greetings Ahava.

  It was a pleasure talking to you today. I would like to welcome you again. I have left you some tasks to complete in H-Tasks. Also, a just quick reminder that there some important differences to the laws of physics and metaphysics. To get some understanding of this please read through the information H-Knowlogy.

  That is all for now. I will contact you later. Remember not to get eaten tonight.

  Ta-ta for now,

  Thoth

  --

  As Ahava read the letter he was fuming with anger. Yet again so little information from Thoth and as for a reminder to not be eaten, that was a great help.

  Ahava thought, Is that Thoth’s sense of humor? If it is then he’s not funny.”

  Ahava decided to reply to the email:

  --

  From: Ahava

  To: Thoth

  Date: 1st day

  Subject: Re-Welcome

  Thoth,

  No thanks for the welcome. I would rather be at home, than in danger. I demand to be sent back!

  Not Happy,

  Ahava

  P.S.- You are not funny.

  --

  Ahava decided next to open the H-Stats application. As the application loaded up the following message appeared:

  Welcome to H-Stats (Version Beta 1)