Glorious Sinner (Lawless Kings, #4.5)

by Sherilee Gray

  I quickly left before she saw me standing there. When I got my hands on Ryan, I was going to make him wish he was dead, then I’d play the genie and give him what he fucking wanted.

  Stephanie had been quiet all dinner, on edge, constantly looking around. When she wasn’t doing that, she was deep in her own head. Today, she’d had a setback, and I fucking hated it. I hated that she was suffering and I didn’t know how to help her.

  We were on our way home after dinner, and she was sitting beside me, staring out the window.

  “I’m sorry,” I said into the silence. “This was a mistake.”

  Her chin jerked around, her gaze shooting to me. “A mistake?” she whispered.

  “I shouldn’t have suggested we go out for dinner after last night, the texts…I fucked up…”

  Her gaze slid away from me, a breath rushing from between her trembling lips.

  Jesus, had she thought…

  She thought I meant having her with me was a mistake.

  Fuck keeping my distance. “Come here, Angel,” I said, giving her the choice to refuse but hoping like fuck that she didn’t.

  There was no hesitation. She slid along the seat, coming right to me like she’d been waiting for me to say those exact words. She pressed in under my arm, tucking herself in close, and I felt all the tension I’d seen in her shoulders, in her rigid spine, leave her body. Christ, she let me take her weight, let me hold her up.

  I had to bite back my smile at the win, but it was hard, because this felt good. Really fucking good. “I’ve got you,” I said. “For as long as you need, and even when you don’t.”

  I felt her suck in a breath, but she nodded, and fuck me, that felt good as well. I moved my fingers against her bare arm, nothing demanding, nothing that could make her feel uncomfortable, or at least I fucking hoped not. I knew I’d gotten it right when she sighed and relaxed more.

  I kept that up, doing my best to keep my damn breathing even and my dick under control. Even though I knew she was a long way from taking it there, and I was okay with that, it didn’t mean my dick had gotten the memo. I wanted her beyond all reason. I wanted her in a way I’d never wanted another woman in my life, and there was no hiding that.

  Finally, I slid my fingers into all that gorgeous fucking red hair, leaned in, and pressed my lips to her temple. “Okay?”

  She nodded. “Yeah.”

  Steph was warm and curvy and soft, and as much as I wanted to do the right thing tonight, after seeing the lust in her eyes in my office, then with her fingers down her panties, touching her pussy, and what happened next, the mix of rage and need I was feeling was near to boiling point. I wanted Ryan off the street. I wanted the threat to Stephanie eliminated.

  I just wanted her.

  Which meant I needed to get the fuck away from her for a few hours and get my shit together.

  So when we walked inside the house a short time later, I pressed a kiss to her wrist and turned her toward the stairs. “I need to get some work done. Why don’t you head up to bed?”

  There was reluctance in her green eyes while they lingered on me, and it took everything in me not to yank her closer and take her mouth, fucking claiming it.

  Finally, she nodded. “Right…I’ll see you in the morning, then?”

  I dipped my chin.

  She started to head up, but stopped, body frozen for one beat, two, then she turned and came back to me.

  Her head tilted back and she looked up at me. “I want to…I want to thank you, for everything,” she said.

  Before I got the chance to remind her that I didn’t need her thanks, she got up onto her tiptoes and pressed a kiss to my jaw, taking me by surprise. I dipped my chin as her fingers curled in my jacket, pulling me closer as she came at me again, this time her lips managing to graze the corner of my mouth. It was a little awkward, a whole lot innocent, and so fucking sweet my gut ached.

  She started to pull away and I stopped her, couldn’t fucking let her go without knowing what her mouth felt like pressed against mine. So I hovered there, giving her the opportunity to stop it if she wanted to, to move back, and when she didn’t I closed the small gap, pressing a soft kiss to her warm, soft as hell lips. Once. Twice.

  She made a little moaning sound that hit me in the gut and made my already hard cock impossibly harder.

  I quickly set her back before I took things too far, before I lost my damn head. “Good night, Steph.”

  She blushed and that just sent my need higher. “Night.” Then she turned and rushed up the stairs.

  I watched her until she disappeared from view then strode to my office, flung off my jacket, rolled up my sleeves, and paced to the bookshelf on the other side of the room.

  There was no cooling the fire pumping through my blood tonight, I knew that much, so I grabbed the bottle of Jack sitting there and unscrewed the lid. But maybe I could numb it a little.

  An hour later, I was three drinks in and failing at getting my shit together. The drinks had done fuck all. I was pretty sure my rage over Ryan had burned off the alcohol before it hit my gut.

  I was staring at my laptop, trying and failing to work, when a light knock hit my office door. I knew who it was, and when she pushed open the door and walked in, I knew why she was seeking me out, what she wanted.

  What she needed.

  Even if she didn’t.

  She was wearing that same robe I’d seen her in earlier. It was hanging open, shorts and what looked like a tank on underneath.

  “You’re still up,” she said, walking in.

  I sat back in my chair, not even trying to hide how hard I was, fucking hoping she’d see it, realize how on edge I was, and run the other way. “What’s going on, Steph?”

  She shrugged. “I couldn’t sleep.” She looked around the office as she moved to the other side of the desk. “I thought I’d see if you were still awake. If you wanted to maybe watch a movie?”

  I should humor her, pretend just like she was, but that was impossible, especially tonight. I’d been gentle with her for twelve months, given her space. Maybe that was the problem. Maybe I’d given her too much space. So I shook my head. “That’s not why you’re here.”

  She stilled, biting down on her lip, eyes getting wider. “What?”

  “Watching a movie isn’t what you want, Angel. That’s not why you’re in my office.”

  “No…I…” She trailed off because she knew I was right and she couldn’t lie to herself or me about that fact now that I’d called her out.

  She was hot and needy, she wanted what she knew I could give her, and she was scared of it at the same time. Ryan had fucked her up in ways I could never understand, but I wasn’t going to let him take this from her, from us.

  “Come here, Stephanie.”

  She blinked, frozen like a deer in headlights.

  I held her gaze. “You trust me?”

  She nodded.

  I sat there waiting for her to make her decision. She stared back at me for the longest time, then finally, fucking finally, she started toward me. When she reached my side, I took her hand, bringing it to my lips, pressing a kiss to her trembling fingers then the inside of her wrist. “When was the last time you had an orgasm, Angel?”

  She stiffened and tried to step back. I wasn’t holding her so tight she couldn’t pull free if she wanted to. She didn’t.

  “You want to, don’t you, Steph? You want to come for me?” I said, voice wrecked now.

  She was still stiff, but she nodded.

  “Talk to me, Stephanie. I need you to talk to me.” I didn’t want her to dredge up that pain, but I couldn’t help her unless I knew what her triggers were, until I knew how to help her. I did what I had earlier, gliding my thumb over her wrist, offering comfort—nothing demanding—making sure she knew I was there for her.

  Her eyes slid shut for a moment, then she looked out the window. “Ryan didn’t like when I pleasured myself. He thought of it as cheating. He was worried I’d think of someo
ne else when I made myself come. He didn’t like that. We hadn’t been married long when I admitted I got myself off occasionally, thought it would please him, that it would be fun, sexy, to share that with him. I was wrong.”

  Jesus fucking Christ.

  “Steph…”

  She turned to me, her eyes locking with mine. “He played along, made me think he liked it, liked that I’d shared that with him. He brought me to the brink of orgasm that night, then just before I came, he slapped me so hard my ears rang. He’d do it every now and then after that. Always when I thought things were good between us, when he wasn’t even…angry. After a while I couldn’t…I couldn’t come anymore. Sex became something else to fear, to dread.” She blinked, and a tear streaked down her face.

  And now she associated sexual pleasure with humiliation and pain.

  It took everything to keep the rage under control, not to hunt that fucker down right then and end him.

  Instead, I reached up and brushed the tear away. “You deserve to feel good, to feel wanted.”

  “You pity me, don’t you? That’s why you came to the club all the time, why you gave me money.” Another tear. “You feel sorry for me.”

  “No…”

  “God, what you must think of me. Staying with a man like that, letting him do what he did to me. Now this…I…I need to go.” She tried to walk away.

  I stopped her again and made her look at me. “I don’t pity you, I fucking worship you. That’s why I came in all those nights, because I couldn’t stay away, because I’ve wanted you since the first time I laid eyes on you. You have all the control, baby, all of it. You have to know that. Christ, Angel, I’m yours to command.”

  Her slender throat worked, her eyes searching mine.

  “Do you want me?” I asked, voice guttural.

  “Yes.” No hesitation.

  Thank fuck. “No one owns your orgasms—no one. I want you to take them back. It’s your body, Stephanie. Take them back.”

  Her lips quivered. “I don’t know how.”

  “I’m going to help you,” I said. “You want that, don’t you? That’s why you’re here right now?”

  She looked scared as fuck, but again she didn’t hesitate. “Yes.”

  “Take off the robe and sit up here.” I patted the desk in front of me.

  She started chewing her lip.

  No man had touched her since Ryan and I didn’t think she was ready for that. “I’m not going to touch you.”

  “I’m not scared of you,” she said. “It’s not you…it’s me…”

  “It’s not you, Stephanie. It was never you. You’re fucking perfect. I promise, I’ll get you there. You want that?”

  She nodded.

  “We’re gonna take this nice and slow, okay?”

  She nodded again and finally closed the distance, climbing up on my desk so she was sitting in front of me.

  “That’s good, Angel.” I slid my fingers down the front of my shirt, undoing the buttons as I went, knowing she liked the way I looked, that she liked the ink. I let the shirt fall open and bit back a growl of relief when I saw her eyes moving over me and she licked her lips like she wanted a taste of me.

  “You like what you see?” I said.

  “Yes,” she said, her eyes moving over me again in a way that had me groaning. “Your body, it’s…it’s beautiful.”

  Her color was high and her lips were puffy from her biting at them. I dropped my hand to my dick and squeezed the hard flesh behind my zipper. “See what you do to me? How much I want you. How fucking gorgeous you are.”

  She licked her lips and wriggled on the desk. She was getting wet, hot, which was exactly what I wanted.

  “I want you to slide your fingers inside your shorts, over your panties, and give that pussy the pressure I know it needs,” I said.

  Her eyes were bright and her breathing choppy, but she was still wary, maybe even afraid of what she was feeling.

  I grinned, a wicked as fuck grin, when she hesitated, wanting to take away the heaviness around us, especially after what she’d told me. I wanted this to be about her, about feeling good. I wanted Ryan out of her head and out of this fucking room. “Oh, Angel, you don’t think you’re doing this alone, do you?” I dropped my fingers to the button of my pants and undid them.

  Her eyes dropped to my hand and she wriggled again. Her soft moan reached me, and my dick started to throb. Fuck knew how I was going to get through this, how I was going to stay in this chair and not lay her back on that desk and fuck her. I would, though. Whatever it took, I’d do it.

  I was about to ask her again to put her hand in her shorts, but I didn’t need to.

  Fuck.

  Her fingers had disappeared down behind the pale blue cotton and the sight nearly undid me. “That’s it,” I rasped and started sliding down my zipper. “Give that pussy the attention it needs, gentle pressure against your clit to start with. Feel good?”

  “Y-yes.” She moaned again.

  I got my zipper open and shoved my boxer briefs down at the front, freeing my cock, unable to hold back my groan of relief. I fisted it, long and thick and harder than I could remember it being. “Fuck, Angel, look at me. Look what you did.”

  Her knees spread wider, lips parting as she stared down at my hard as fuck cock.

  “Put your feet on my knees,” I said. “Thighs nice and wide so you can get your fingers where you need them most.”

  “Oh God.” She whimpered. “You’re…you’re so hard and…” She broke off on another moan.

  I stroked my cock nice and slow, because right then I wanted to do the opposite. I wanted to pump my cock hard and fast and relieve my throbbing balls, but this wasn’t about me. I had to get Steph there first. “You ready to go under your panties?”

  She nodded, her beautiful hair sliding over her shoulder as she did as I asked.

  “How wet are you, Steph? Tell me.”

  “So wet. I’ve never…I never felt like this before. My skin feels tight and hot and I’m aching.”

  Her thighs started to quiver and I started stroking faster. “Slide a finger over your tight little opening.”

  Her head fell back and her moans got more insistent.

  “It wants to be filled, doesn’t it, Angel? It wants fucking so bad.”

  She started shaking, her whole body, her toes curling against my thighs. “Yes. Oh God, yes.”

  “Push it in. Push your finger inside, nice and deep. Imagine it’s my hand, my finger. It’s me getting you off. It’s me getting you ready for my cock.”

  “Yes…yes, please…” She gasped.

  Her hand moving inside her shorts was so fucking hot. “That’s it, faster. Fuck yourself faster for me.”

  Her whole body stiffened and her face screwed up, and I knew he was there. He was in her head. “Look at me,” I growled. “Look at me, Stephanie.”

  Her eyes popped opened and there was fear there mixed with the pleasure.

  “Watch me, Stephanie. Keep your eyes on me.”

  Her eyes locked on mine and the fear bled from her eyes, the pleasure taking over again.

  Stephanie’s cry filled the room, her desperate whimpers turning me inside out as she shook and sobbed through her first orgasm in a long fucking time.

  Seeing that, I couldn’t hold on another moment. A shout erupted from me and I was coming, ropes of come splashing my stomach and chest.

  As soon as I was finished, I yanked my shirt closed and caught her when she slumped on the desk, lifting her into my arms. “I’ve got you.” I kissed the top of her head, did up my pants, and carried her out of the office.

  Her hand slid up my chest, gripping my shirt. “Thank you,” she said against my throat.

  Christ, she had no clue. Didn’t she realize? Didn’t she see?

  She’d done more for me than I’d could ever do for her.

  8

  Stephanie

  I woke in Tomas’s bed, in his room. I bolted upright. The bed beside me w
as empty. The bathroom door was open, no sound coming from inside. He wasn’t here.

  My face heated when I thought about what we did in his office last night—not just my face, my whole body. I couldn’t believe I’d actually done that in front of Tomas. That he’d done the same in front of me.

  Yes, I’d seen guys get themselves off before. I worked in a strip club, it happened, but that wasn’t hot or sexy, and they weren’t Tomas. The last thing I remember was being lifted off the desk. I must have fallen asleep in his arms when he carried me upstairs.

  God, I’d passed out on him.

  The bedroom door opened and my head shot up. Tomas walked in, wearing those black PJ bottoms, his chest bare, hair mussed. And he was carrying a tray.

  “You’re awake,” he said, voice still rough from sleep.

  I tucked my hair behind my ear, finding it hard to meet his steady gaze. I took my clothes off for a living, in front of a room full of people. I didn’t get shy. It was different with Tomas, though. I felt like I was baring more than my body when I was with him, so much more, and I wasn’t sure how to deal with it.

  He sat on the side of the bed, putting the tray down on the other side of me. “Thought you might be hungry,” he said, and reached out, touching my hair, gently rubbing it between his fingers. “You passed out last night.”

  “Sorry, I, ah, I haven’t been sleeping very well the last few nights,” I said. A shiver raced through me when Tomas curled the fingers of his other hand around my wrist and stroked the skin there with his thumb like he often did.

  “Why are you sorry?” he said, some of the heat leaving his eyes.

  As much as I wanted to pretend nothing had changed, it had. I wasn’t some nervous teenager, and Tomas wasn’t some guy who took me to prom. He was a powerful man, one used to getting what he wanted, and I had no doubt that included women. I forced myself to hold his stare. “Look, about last night. I, ah…I wanted to be with you, to have sex with you, but…”

  “Steph…”

  “But I don’t think I can…not yet.” My belly squirmed and that pissed me the hell off. So much for not acting like a nervous teenager.