Reckless Hate: A Bully High School Romance (enemies-friends-enemies-lovers-enemies) (Westbrook Blues Book 1)

by Thandiwe Mpofu

  I don’t know why and I fucking don’t understand—but I want to soothe the hurt that I just inflicted. My right palm starts caressing the solid, chiseled cheek that I just assaulted.

  I’m apologizing.

  Ace pulls away, leaving my lips bruised and definitely puffed but I don’t care. On their own volition, I start peppering kisses all over his face,

  “I’m sorry.” A kiss on his forehead. “I didn’t mean to lash out like that.” Another kiss over his eyelids. “I’m sorry, Ace.” I press an open mouth kiss on the cheek that I slapped.

  Ace groans low in his chest and it pains my entire body. I don’t know what’s happening between us but I need him right now. “You make me so fucking mad.” I tell him, pressing our foreheads together.

  It’s painful. The constricting in my chest, the air between us, the groans of this hurt, large man before me and the painful past that haunts me like nothing else in this world.

  It all hurts.

  “You destroy me each time.” He growls.

  Heartbeat.

  Heartbeat.

  “You’ve already destroyed me Ace. I’m sorry.”

  “What was about to happen back there?” He questions again, he can barely contain the anger in his voice and I know in his eyes, I’ll only see destruction. Ace has never been good with his anger, not since we were kids and I know and sense that it’s even more now.

  “Nothing happened.” I answer but even the trembling of my voice tells on me that I’m lying.

  “You have never been a good liar in your entire fucking life. You have also never fucking lied to me before, don’t you dare start spewing this shit to me now!” He is harsh, he is brash. Demanding.

  He grinds into me and I moan so loud, my cheeks actually warm in embarrassment.

  “I just want answers, Ace. He’s not. . .I’m not at rest without them.”

  “Stop digging, Star.” He rumbles his displeasure. “I fucking mean it.”

  His words feel like an ice bucket has just been poured over me and I’m once again back on earth, free from the hazy cloud of intoxicating, addictive arousal that Ace creates, just by being around.

  I try to push at his chest, letting my feet drop from straddling him but he doesn’t let go of his hold on me, in fact, he opens my legs further and presses in my core, groaning as he does so.

  Oh god.

  “How can you say that? What did you fucking do?”

  “Damnit Star, can’t you fucking see that I’m trying to protect you here?” He growls, stepping away from me allowing me to step away from his hold. “Can’t you fucking see that there is something beyond your control going on here?”

  “So why keep me in the dark?”

  “Because you are in fucking danger that’s why. You come around here like you can just get by unnoticed. And I know you fucking think that your digging is harmless, it’s fucking not!” He runs a hand through his short hair in obvious frustration.

  “I told you to stay away from him. I fucking warned you and here you are, sexy as fuck in the lion’s den and demanding attention just by the way you walk. What was about to happen there?” He points back to where the party is in full swing.

  “I had it under control!” I shout back but I’m trembling. I remember the suffocating force of my constricted breath, the weight of danger pressing down on my chest making it pretty difficult to breath. My heart pounding so hard as I watch the predator that is Ace. A predator that somehow controls the storm around us.

  “Your fucking eyes told on you! I know that piece of shit saw it too but he still moved in. What was he going to fucking do?” Ace steps into my personal space, demanding that I look up at him. I step back.

  “I had it under control.” By this point though, my voice is weak, defeated by the truth Ace is trying to show me.

  I don’t want him to shout at me, I’m almost at the verge of tears because I see what he is saying. I know he is right, I felt it too. I’m just denying it.

  A rough, calloused fore finger and a thumb are suddenly tugging my chin up with a gentleness that shatters walls and builds a tenderness that I don’t want, yet crave from him.

  I quickly close my eyes. I don’t want him to see my tears. I know what that means. I shiver and he sighs, then his heat disappears. My eyes fly open, looking him, only to find him stretching out his sexy as hell torso to remove his hoodie. Fuck, he isn’t that boy anymore. He is a man now, a man that I don’t want to cry in front of if I know what’s best for me. I watch in stunned silence as he dresses me with that same hoodie.

  Immediately I feel warm, sheltered, engulfed in his large, warm hoodie. It smells like him. Like a mix between a royal kind of violence, danger and arousal. Ace smells like the fresh air that I crave, the fresh breeze from up in the mountains where the estates are located but then there is that tantalizing scent that is all Ace that makes me heady and delirious with arousal and need.

  He moves back into my personal space. We breath in unison, watching each other with heavy leaded gazes. I can feel he tense energy between us, pulling us closer. I know what he wants but I can’t give it to him. I have to be wise about this. I break gaze and look down at our feet but not for long. His electrifying touch tugs my chin up again. And just like before, I quickly shut my eyes.

  I can feel the intense burn behind my eyes. I need to get the tears under control because if I cry. . .

  “Don’t fucking do that, open your eyes let me see them.” His voice is gentle but I know it’s not a request, it’s a command.

  “Open them, let me see.” He gently presses a kiss in between my eyes and I try as hard as I can but the tears start falling down my cheeks, and I open my eyes.

  “Ace, please. . .”

  “There they are. I have never lied to you, I have never fucking broken a promise to you, even when you did.” His voice is raspy and I can feel the threat permeating the space between us.

  “Ace, no.”

  “What did I tell you about them?” He questions gently, looking down at me with war and murder in his eyes. “What did I fucking say, Star?”

  “That. . .” I stutter because in this moment I know I’m about to be responsible for another devastation. It’s going to happen because of me.

  “Finish it.”

  “That my tears seal fate.” I sniffle but I know I can’t wipe my tears away, not when he is present, it will only make things worse.

  “Whose fucking fate?” He questions, gazing down at me, our gazes connected, hearts thumping at the same beat, the same base.

  “The fate of whatever or whoever caused them.”

  And just like that, Dereck’s fate has just been sealed.

  SILENTLY, ACE OPENS the passenger door of his car for me and gestures for me to get in. I’m not about to fight with him, not when he is in this state. Not when I’m in this state either.

  When I’m settled in the luxurious seat, he leans over and secures my seatbelt but doesn’t move away until I turn my head back only to find his gaze waiting on me.

  Is he going to kiss me again? I want him to kiss me again, I’m almost panting with the need but instead, his gaze drops down to the pendant around my neck.

  Something in his eyes change, his nostrils flare and then he cups my cheek, bringing my face closer to him.

  We gaze into each other’s eyes but for us it has never been hearts and flowers, it has never been the rainbow and the fucking colors. For as long as I can remember with this very boy in my childhood, both of our eyes have held trauma, have held pain, mayhem, chaos, confusion.

  And an understanding of each other.

  Only now, it’s all grown and morphed into unprecedented measures. He still gives me chills. I’m still fucking scared of him but now, now my brother is gone and things are different. A lot happened here and we are both different.

  He is studying me so carefully, very much detailed and thorough. I know we are not on the same page here. Even though Ace has never lied to me, I know for a
fact that he won’t be forthcoming with the answers I need. I know he will keep a chunk of knowledge away from me and that pains me. It pains me to know that he doesn’t trust me with the truth.

  No matter how much he can try to mask it, I can see the distrust in his eyes. He doesn’t trust me. And while the feeling is the same for me to him, it hurts knowing he feels like I betrayed him. There is hurt, there is anguish in him—and in me.

  They say time heals all wounds, that’s a fucking lie. Time worsens wounds. Time rots wounds, time corrupts, time disintegrates. Time kills, time never forgives and time never forgets.

  Anguish. We are intricately linked together by anguish. It might be unknown in it’s true nature but he isn’t a fool, he knows it’s there. I wonder if he knows what happened to me. . .

  I’m still trying to figure his anguish though. And over time, my issues—my anguish—have grown bigger, and so has his—whatever those are—it's all in his eyes, and in the way he touches me.

  Everything feels painfully real and so damn blue.

  I lift my hand softly and cup his cheek, the one I hurt before and caress it again as softly as I can. I apologize with my eyes because I know he doesn’t want my words right now.

  I can see the calculating gleam in his eyes as the gears shift in his head. My tears might have dried but the way he is looking at me right now, I swear it feels like my tears are still falling.

  “I’m taking you home.” He declares and with that, he shuts the door and rounds to his side of car. He jumps in and brings the car to life, only to quickly back out of the deserted, rural road. I have no idea why he parked out here but it’s obvious he knew I was here and he knew exactly where I was.

  “We can’t leave Kim here.” I tell him after a long minute.

  “Why are you friends with her?” He questions after a while.

  He doesn’t spare me a glance but I can feel the tense energy between us. I’m not so sure why he is asking but I can see that he doesn’t want me to be friends with Kim. In fact, Ace has never really approved of any of my friends before.

  All of them—especially Brittney who he seems to be friendly with now. Just the thought of Brittney and how she was so close to Ace on Friday before the confrontation sours my whole mood.

  It fucking pisses me off and in that moment, I’m reminded that Ace is not my prince who is trying to rescue me. He is obviously trying to block me from getting to the truth. Blocking all and every attempt that I have at finding out the truth as to what happened to my brother.

  Fucking hell.

  “So, you want to dictate who I can be friends with now?” I don’t even bother looking at him, my voice is already icy and sharp. I hate it when he is so condescending like that. After all, it might just be because he wants to isolate me. Dark, bad things happen to isolated people. I know that better than anyone.

  “I fucking question everything that goes on in your life.” is his only response.

  It’s then that I turn sharply to look at him. He hasn’t changed one bit. Still the same entitled asshole, thinks he can rule everyone and dominate everything. Well, it has never been me. It will never be me.

  “Stop this car.” I demand but he only increases the speed.

  “I told you that Kim is back there and I won’t just abandon her.”

  “You mean like you have a history of doing?” He grits out. I can practically hear the grinding of his molars with the clenching of his teeth.

  “No one asked you stalk me or follow me. I don’t need you to protect me from whatever it is you think I need protecting from.” I shout at him as we speed down the dirt road. The road is bumpy and I’m being jostled around like a fucking bag of potatoes.

  “And I don’t need you either.”

  I don’t know what happens but the car halts to an immediate stop right there in the middle of the deserted road. If it wasn’t for the seatbelt holding me in my place, I swear, I would be out of the seat and out through the windshield.

  Fear.

  It snakes through my system right there and then and I’m suddenly frozen in my seat, the need to escape now growing so intensely within me. He isn’t looking at me—and I don’t want to look at him for fear of the white hot branding anger that I know he has right now—but from the corner of my eye, I can see the one hand at the steering wheel and his knuckles are pale white—evidence of him gripping the wheel so tight.

  “Get out.”

  The demand is so abrupt and sudden that I think I must have heard him wrong. He can’t have possibly ordered me to get out right here. Out of nowhere is where we are and I really don’t know this place but he just ordered me out.

  “What?” My voice is a stutter, filled with disbelief. He must be into comedy now, I mean what sane person would order me to exit the car to the wild. The party that Dereck invited us to was at the very edge of the town, with wild vast aches of undeveloped land stretching for miles.

  It’s chilly and really dark out there and I have no idea what kind of animals are there but I wouldn’t be surprised to find a mountain lion. This is high altitude land after all.

  “Get out.” He says for the second time and I can see his patience has run out.

  I’m just about to plead with him but my door is suddenly opened out of nowhere. My heart is racing and fear is an understatement. Surely Ace doesn’t mean to end my life out here in the wild. Surely, he doesn’t mean to kill me like he did my brother. He just fucking kissed me a few minutes ago and literally told me that there is danger.

  Am I so naïve to have believed him and the history we share that I willingly wore his hoodie—giving myself a sense of false security in the process—then hop into his car like everything is all bright and shiny in the world? How stupid can one be? Ace has shown me, on several occasions just how brutal and ruthless he can be, why did I. . .

  My head whips from Ace to the sudden interruption—probably a hired hitman to end my life and make it look like a fucking accident. As soon as the gust of wind rushes into the car from the open doorway, I let out a shrill scream.

  “Please don’t kill me! Please!” I say in between my screams.

  “Jesus, what did you do to her?”

  Somewhere between the fear that courses through me and the noise that I just created, I think I just heard Emmett’s voice. Is Ace going to have Emmett kill me?

  “Astraea! Stop!” There it is again, his voice.

  My screams stop and I open my eyes and slowly look to the open doorway and there he stands, looking dark and mysterious as ever.

  “Emmett?”

  “Shit, what the hell is wrong with you?” Ace questions, none to friendly but I ignore him looking at Emmett’s expressionless face and his dark gaze that penetrates me.

  “Are you going to kill me out here?” I question him, my voice low. All he does is raise an eyebrow and then shoots Ace a look. I have no idea what kind of communication passes between them but for whatever reason, Emmett steps closer and then reaches for my seatbelt to undo it.

  “Well, are you?” I question again. If anyone is going to end my life, I would rather it be someone I know. Someone as large as Emmett would be just fine with me. That way I’ll know why my life ended and just who I’m supposed to haunt soon after.

  “You know, you really do have so many questions that are starting to piss me off. If I was going to kill you, I would have done it up in the mountains not down here.” He answers as he unclips my seatbelt. His long fingers graze over my thigh as he does and then our gazes connect but I can’t read anything in Emmett’s eyes, and that makes me shiver.

  “I don’t have time for this. I have things to do.” Ace grits out. I turn to look at him, breaking gaze with Emmett—but he isn’t looking at me.

  “Let’s go, Astraea.” He says after unclipping the seatbelt. He tugs my hand but I can’t stop looking at Ace.

  “Where are you going?” I question him with suspicion. Ace has never really been one not to follow through on his promises and
I know for a fact that he also isn’t good at being still. He always needs to be doing something, but right now, he is just too. . .still.

  Is it because of what I said?

  “Ace, what are you going to do?” I question again, but my voice is low and breathy. That stillness in him, that’s something new and it frightens—no—it terrifies me and chills me to the bone.

  He turns then and our gazes connect. He doesn’t say anything but an icy frost has set in his eyes and as he looks at me, it extends to my bones. The thing about Alexander King the IV is that he doesn’t really ever forgive and right now, for whatever reason, he isn’t forgiving about whatever situation that has him on lock up like that right now.

  “Go with Emmett, I’ll deal with you later.” Is all he says after a while then turns away, dismissing me right then like I’m nothing.

  “Ace. . .”

  “Go.”

  I sit there frozen until I feel Emmett’s gentle nudging on my thigh. Looking over at his expressionless face, I take his outstretched hand and he helps me out of the car but before he can shut the car door after me, I turn back and shoot Ace another look.

  “If you do what I know you can do, don’t bother showing up to my house.”

  And with that, I turn away and make my way to a Jeep Cherokee that I hadn’t noticed parked by the side. I think it’s Emmett’s car but the guy has always had a hardon for cars and he commits to them so well that I’m disappointed to see this silver car.

  Ace peels out of there with so much speed and leaves a storm of dust in his wake, but whatever. I know he is going back for Dereck. I know he has something in store for me too but it doesn’t compare to whatever he has in line for Dereck.

  I walk over to the passenger seat but before I can open the passenger door, Emmett’s hand passes over mine and he opens the door for me instead, opening it for me. I pause and turn to look up at him from over my shoulder. He returns my gaze but for the life of me, I have no idea what he is thinking.